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The Worst You've Had To Pee During A Flight  
User currently offlineYflyer From United States of America, joined Feb 2007, 1350 posts, RR: 1
Posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

I was tempted to call this thread "When you've got to go, you've got to go!" but thought I should go with a more descriptive title.  Smile This is obviously going to be a bit of a silly topic, but I know most of us have been there -- you have to use the lav, but that darn seatbelt sign is on.

So here's my story. I was flying on my company's corprate air shuttle from SJC up to HIO (Silicon Valley spotters can probably guess where I work). During the flight, the FA offered everyone a bottle of water, and I accepted. And a little while later, she offered more water, and again I accepted. A bit later I figured I should go use the lav while I have a chance, but it was occupied (being an ERJ135 there was only one), so I stayed in my seat. And just my luck, as soon as the lav becomes free, on comes the seatbelt sign for our decent.

Now in retrospect I probably could have gotten away with just getting up anyway if I'd gone right then, but I didn't want to be "that guy" who disregards the seatbelt sign. And at that point I didn't have go that badly, so I thought I could wait until we were on the ground. That was not the case. As we desended into HIO, all that water I had drunk during the flight started to work its way through my system, and things started getting a bit more... urgent. Of course by that point it was definately too late to get up. By the time we were on the ground I had my hands on my seatbelt buckle, just wanting the pilots to hurry up and taxi to the terminal already. Holding it in was actually starting to get painful. The second, no, the milisecond that seatbelt sign went off I was up out of my seat and sprinting to the back of the plane, dodging the people getting up to retreive their carry-ons. As one coworker put it, I was in my seat, and then I was just a blur moving toward the back of the plane. I had never been so relieved to get to a bathroom. But afterwards we all had a good laugh about it.

Anyone else have an amusing airplane pee story?  Smile

20 replies: All unread, jump to last
User currently offlinePanAm747 From United States of America, joined Feb 2004, 4242 posts, RR: 8
Reply 1, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

They always say "while flying, you should keep yourself properly rehydrated".

Unless of course, you're flying out of Chicago ORD.

After having a bit of time to kill, I had a small bottle of water.

As they were calling for boarding, I did my best to flush it out of my system.

We waited on the ground for 45 minutes before taking off. Our climb - a 757, no less - seemed to take forever. Finally, when my bladder refused to accept the seat-belt sign anymore, I unbuckled and made my way to the bathroom. The flight attendants were not pleased, but I told them it was an emergency, which it was.

I was fine after that.

The moral of the story - NO LIQUIDS BEFORE ENTERING A PLANE!! Especially with an empty stomach...

Pan Am:The World's Most Experienced Airline - P(oor) S(ailor's) A(irline): San Diego's Hometown Airline-Catch Our Smile!
User currently offlineJeremy From United States of America, joined May 2001, 668 posts, RR: 1
Reply 2, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

I was on a QF 744 flying SYD to LAX and we were about 20 minutes from landing.
I decided that I would wait until we land to empty my bladder.
Bad idea.
The plane had to do a go around, which took another 20 minutes.
I learned my lesson and so now if I have to go, no waiting for me!

You are now free to be sexually harassed and then terminated for filing a complaint--Southwest Airlines to me.
User currently offlineYflyer From United States of America, joined Feb 2007, 1350 posts, RR: 1
Reply 3, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

Quoting Jeremy (Reply 2):
I learned my lesson and so now if I have to go, no waiting for me!

My number one rule to live by is now "Never pass up an opportunity to pee!"

User currently offlineZBBYLW From Canada, joined Nov 2006, 2019 posts, RR: 4
Reply 4, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

I was flying (in a C150) YLW-YCW before leaving YLW I was about to go to the washroom but someone else was in it, I decided to go do my walk around first. Anyhow I remembered I had to go as I was rotating. I contemplated stopping in YDC but decided to "press on" while I was coming up to YHE I had to pee in the bottle - no other option. Let me tell you at 6'4 at the time, peeing in a bottle in a C150 can pose some challenges.

Keep the shinny side up!
User currently offlineFbgdavidson From United Kingdom, joined Oct 2004, 3831 posts, RR: 26
Reply 5, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

I had a REALLY bad one just over a year ago. Was flying RIC-ORD on United Express and had arrived at the airport a little early. I went to the Sam Adam's Brewhouse in the Concourse and indulged in a couple of pints of the Cherry Wheat flavour beer. Delicious it was too  bigthumbsup 

The flight was called and I didn't think much about visiting the bathroom but for an ERJ it filled up pretty slowly and we left a bit late, then we had to wait to cross the main runway, another rarity for RIC. At this point I felt I needed to go but thought the weather was clear (as per the brief from the front) and all would be well once we were airborne. It wasn't.

We climbed out of Richmond with absolutely clear skies in every direction, a beautiful day for flying...I waited and waited and waited for the seatbelt sign to come off and it just wouldn't. About 40mins into the flight the sole FA began beverage service which was my sign it was safe to go to the bathroom. I was in the second row and she told me to stay in my seat as she served the person in 1A  Yeah sure in the end she got to about row 6 and I told her I was really sorry but if she didn't let me go to the bathroom right now the aircraft would be smelling of pee for the next 45mins. The prospect of me flying on to the west coast with 'wet jeans' didn't bear thinking about either. After some gymnastics to get me to the rear bathroom I finally managed to unload. Second best feeling ever! I apologised when we disembarked at Chicago but decided that being the guy who ignored the seatbelt sign was better than being the guy who pissed himself. As it was the seatbelt sign wasn't switched off the entire flight...GRR!

Sometimes you just HAVE to go...

"My first job was selling doors, door to door, that's a tough job innit" - Bill Bailey
User currently offlineBAViscount From United Kingdom, joined Mar 2004, 2338 posts, RR: 3
Reply 6, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

Now, I love aviation, and everything connected with it. What I do have a slight problem with is the flight itself! Back in the early 90's, a friend suggested that a couple of glasses of Southern Comfort and Canadian Club in the airport bar would be just what I needed to cure the inflight nerves. And oh how right he was!! He actually suggested this at LGW just as I was about to board a BA DC10 to JFK. A couple of glasses later I was ready to fly that MD myself!!

Consequently, whenever I fly, I try my best to have a tipple or two before the flight. Not so much as to be denied boarding you understand, but enough to get to that happy, relaxed place!

And of course, connected with the intake of fluids inevitably comes the need to get rid of those liquids too!

I can't begin to share any anecdotes with you about flinging my merry self over a passenger or two to get to the loo, or clinging desperately to seatbacks as I make my way up the aisle during moderate turbulence while hoping that my bladder urges didn't get the better of me. But what I can say is that one of the obvious side effects of a drink or two (or three...or four...!) is that the moment that seatbelt sign goes off, off to the lav I have to go! The biggest problem comes when:

a) The seatbelt sign DOESN'T go off, or
b) When those that weren't lucky enough (IMHO) to get the window seat are a little testy and scratchy when you request that they get their fat a*ses out of the way before your kidneys have a little breakdown of their very own!

Suffice it to say that I have had some VERY close calls (I don't like to disturb scratchy people!)! Now I know why I always have a habit of packing one extra pair of boxer shorts for my trip!! It's an inbuilt instinct to pack underwear for the number of nights I'll be away...plus 1!!

Ladies & gentlemen this is Captain Tobias Wilcock welcoming you aboard Coconut Airways flight 372 to Bridgetown Barb
User currently offlineSrbmod From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 7, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 11 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

My last ATL-LAS flight. I had a few beers before the flight and a soda with dinner, so I was already setting myself for a lav trip during the flight (I made damn sure I peed before getting on the a/c.). About 90 minutes into the flight (and after the first round of drink service) I needed to go really badly. One slight problem. The flight was on a 757 and I had the window seat. The person sitting in the middle had decided to take a nap on their tray table so I had to wait until they woke up. After about 20 minutes of waiting and repositioning my legs, they finally woke up, and I was able to get up. Thankfully the flight back was on a 763 and I only had one person to pass by.

User currently offlineIAHFLYR From United States of America, joined Jun 2005, 4790 posts, RR: 21
Reply 8, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 11 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

RSW-TPA on Gulfstream International B1900D flight as CO Connection.......got to the airport a bit earlier than normal and had a few beers at the bar. Flight got delayed out of TPA to RSW due to weather, well another beer and then some water, a bathroom break and another water.

Yawn, time to board and they wanted to get out o RSW in a hurry due to an approaching thunderstorm so no time for my usual trip to the boys room.

All was fine until we started our descent into TPA....the curtain was open and I could clearly see from 1A that there was a huge storm right in front of us, and looking at the DME from PIE and altitude as I looked around the F/O that we were near the final approach fix for 36R......but I had to pee really bad now. As we descend on the approach we are in a driving rain storm and end up missing the approach, oh not good for me now. I think I had more bodily fluids in me than the airplane had encountered on the approach........my back teeth were floating!  stretch 

Miraculously we got an approach inbound on 18L almost immediately as the storm passed quickly to the south, whew was I ever glad I was in 1A when that door opened but darn, still had to wait for my carry on before dashing into the terminal and into the restroom, thank goodness my connection to IAH was late so I could enjoy the time in the restroom.  yes 

Lesson I learned that day, ALWAYS take the time to use the restroom even when you think you don't!!!!! I've waited in the que long enough to know if I hadn't I'd be back in the same boat again!  Smile

Any views shared are strictly my own and do not a represent those of any former employer.
User currently offlineNG1Fan From Australia, joined Aug 2007, 446 posts, RR: 0
Reply 9, posted (8 years 3 months 5 days 1 hour ago) and read 32767 times:

Wasn't so much the Nr 1 as the Nr 2. I was on a flight Samara - Moscow (can't remember which airport, possibly VKO). It was an early flight, so no breakfast at the Renaissance in Samara. Just as well, since whatever I ate the previous evening with a client did not agree with me.

When I was lumped with Row 32 on the Samara Airlines Tu-154, I was a bit miffed. However, that turned to pure joy when the tummy rumbles began. I had my choice of three toilets, and believe me, I got to experience every one of them. The flight took about 1 hour and 45 mins. For some of that time, when the seatbelt sign was off, I simply stood by the toilet door and waited for that umnistakable pressure on the sphincter as my cue to swing the door open and let rip.


User currently offline1stfl94 From United Kingdom, joined May 2006, 1455 posts, RR: 0
Reply 10, posted (8 years 3 months 4 days 17 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

On my last flight, a BA/GB A321 out of Malta I pretty much needed a pee as soon as I sat down. However as soon as I thought that the seatbelt sign pinged and the cabin crew began the safety demo. So, I decided that I could wait until we were in the air, after all we wouldn't spend that long taking off, since Malta Airport is roughly the size of a car park. Unfortunately it seems that taking off at Malta involves a twenty minute taxi including a full backtrack down the runway. At this point my friend sitting next (I was by the window as well) to me had fallen asleep by bracing against the seat in front of her blocking any access out. Then came the world's slowest takeoff (you think an A343 has a slow takeoff, I thought we might be actually be driving back to Gatwick!). Eventually 45 minutes after leaving the ground the captain announced we were in the cruise but the seatbelt sign remained on despite the beautifully clear night. After another fifteen minutes I decided that enough was enough otherwise I was going to have an accident. But even that wasn't easy. My friend took five minutes to wake up and which she point she gave me one of those expressions that could kill and then had to wait for 2 drinks carts to be moved to get up to the loos. The longest hour and fifteen minutes of my life!

User currently offlineUltimateDelta From United States of America, joined Sep 2007, 2345 posts, RR: 5
Reply 11, posted (8 years 3 months 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

Once, on a Delta flight from Savannah to Atlanta, beforehand I had had a large Powerade and a half, and as soon as we took off, we encountered a thunderstorm. So first, the sign stayed on the whole 40 minutes, AND the plane shaking around like a force-feedback video game controller gone spastic! That really pissed (pun not intended!) me off.

Midwest Airlines- 1984-2010
User currently offlineFlyboyOz From Australia, joined Nov 2000, 2041 posts, RR: 21
Reply 12, posted (8 years 3 months 2 days 9 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

In business class, a cabin crew always served lots of drinks and i drank too much..orange juice, 10 glasses of water, soft drinks, tea and hot chocolate. Oh man I drank a lot and i was waiting waiting for the pax to came out and i couldnt hold that for too long. I saw a pax coming out but another pax from the first row went to the bathroom but didnt see me at the back. Then I still had to wait again and again...then I had to get out and stand in the galley and waiting for the other pax to get out quickly. LOL! I have learnt my lesson is that I will not drink too much.

The Spirit of AustraliAN - Longreach
User currently offlineStratosphere From United States of America, joined Sep 2007, 1707 posts, RR: 5
Reply 13, posted (8 years 3 months 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

I actually had a bunch of beers in the airport and at least one in first class before departure in DFW on the way to MEM on a DC-9 well the weather was crappy for starters it was raining cats and dogs. Well we pushed off the gate and taxied and got in a long line for departure. Then we sat... Now my bladder was at full capacity. Finally i couldn't hold it anymore..I asked the F/A since we were not moving if I could use the restroom he said he would call the flight deck. Then he said ok..Man i let loose and it seemed like forever to relieve myself then all of a sudden we are moving and i am not finished yet then I can tell we are taking the runway..So I am rushing to finish I cannot believe the F/A isnt dragging my ass out of the lav and we start what I though t was the takeoff roll but we took the next taxiway and got back into position so I am freaking because I think I am the one who foiled the takeoff and as a non-rev I was thinking man I am going to have to answer for this.. But come to find out it was not me DFW had switched departures because of the weather so I made it back to my seat relieved in more ways than one.

User currently offlineAndz From South Africa, joined Feb 2004, 8596 posts, RR: 9
Reply 14, posted (8 years 3 months 1 day 19 hours ago) and read 32767 times:
Support Airliners.net - become a First Class Member!

Never been dying to pee but once when I was a kid flying Lisbon-Luanda-Salisbury on a TAP 707 I desperately needed to take a dump while we were taxiing. When the seatbelt sign went off there was a queue and as I got in and sat down the seatbelt sign went on. The next minute we hit turbulence and I got bounced off the lav onto the floor!

After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says WTF...
User currently offlinePlymSpotter From Spain, joined Jun 2004, 12169 posts, RR: 56
Reply 15, posted (8 years 3 months 1 day 18 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

The worst I have ever felt was on a PLH-BRS-MAN Air Southwest flight. I'd left PLH needing the loo, and after a half hour ground stop in BRS I still forgot to go, but decided to wait until we were in flight up to MAN. Well, the turbulence was too bad to leave my seat for the entire one hour flight to MAN, where-upon we sat on the taxiway for 35 minutes waiting for a stand to become available, vibrating as only an old Dash 8 knows how to vibrate. grumpy  35 minutes of sitting with an agonising need of visiting the toilet, which was literally 6 feet in front of me! The second the seat belt signs were released once we were parked I shot into the loo, much relieved!

On the opposite side though, I've had an entire 13/14 hour HKG-CDG flight during which I've not even left my seat and felt no need to relieve myself.

Dan  Smile

...love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage again...
User currently offlineNovak500 From Canada, joined Dec 2007, 121 posts, RR: 0
Reply 16, posted (8 years 3 months 9 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

My worst expereince was after landing at ORD, we were late and our slot was taken so we had to wait....and wait...and wait. The seatbelt sign was still on the FA's were not happy but I had to make a dash for the loo. Of course as I got in there the plane started to move.

User currently offlineStarAlliance38 From United States of America, joined Jan 2008, 1447 posts, RR: 3
Reply 17, posted (8 years 2 months 3 weeks 1 day 10 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

I had to go really bad on a flight in Katowice Airport. It really irritated me that I had go after we began our descent and I couldn't get up. What really irritated me was I was flying WizzAir!

Lol, I just made up that story. I thought it would be funny. WizzAir  Smile

Roar, lion, roar
User currently offlineIDISA From Italy, joined Jun 2004, 268 posts, RR: 0
Reply 18, posted (8 years 2 months 3 weeks 20 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

Happened to me on a Icelandair 757 flying KEF-CDG. Some 40 mins before landing in CDG I felt I need to get to the lav but the queue was very long and didn't wanted to stay in the middle of the aisle just waiting and at first didn't seem so urgent.
Some 10 mins later I REALLY felt I had to take a pee. The same moment BOING! seat belts signs were switched on due to bad weather on the descent into CDG.

The remaining 30 mins of that flight were the worst of my life on an airplane. When we finally landed and reached our gate I was one of the first to jump out of the plane apologizing and saying I had a short connection and had to hurry...
Needles to say my connection wasn't with next flight (more than 6 hrs ahead...) but with the toilet  Smile


User currently offlineBAViscount From United Kingdom, joined Mar 2004, 2338 posts, RR: 3
Reply 19, posted (8 years 2 months 2 weeks 6 days 12 hours ago) and read 32767 times:

Quoting StarAlliance38 (Reply 17):
Lol, I just made up that story. I thought it would be funny. WizzAir

Oh ha...errrmmm...ha?!  Wink Ironically enough, I had the most interesting pee of my flying life aboard a WizzAir flight LTN-BUD. Just after I entered the bathroom sans bath we encountered pretty bad turbulence and were instructed to take our seats immediately. Unfortunately, needs must when the devil drives, so I had to continue with my business regardless. I pity the F/A who was charged with keeping that toilet clean, although I did try and help out by using the one-ply supplied, but was in a rush to comply with the pilot's instruction!! Big grin

Ladies & gentlemen this is Captain Tobias Wilcock welcoming you aboard Coconut Airways flight 372 to Bridgetown Barb
User currently offlineMirrodie From United States of America, joined Apr 2000, 7459 posts, RR: 60
Reply 20, posted (8 years 2 months 2 weeks 6 days 11 hours ago) and read 32767 times:
Support Airliners.net - become a First Class Member!

Quoting Yflyer (Thread starter):
I didn't want to be "that guy" who disregards the seatbelt sign.

That pretty much sums it up. On 7/7/08, I was on the way to Seattle for hte 787 rollout. In the business section of the a/c. I felt the need upon taxiing nad didn't want to "disregard" the seltbelt sign as we climbed.

Nature calls is one thing but if pain becomes an issue, I gotta go!

Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
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