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How Do You Tell A F/A To Be Quiet!  
User currently offlineBoeingForEver From United States of America, joined Dec 2004, 219 posts, RR: 0
Posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10346 times:

so i always wonder how to tell off a flight atttendant if they are doing something rude, or being inapropriate.
last week i flew on AA's flagship service from LAX-JFK in F class. this is a 3 class service, and although i flew with points, this is a 4500$ r/t ticket. how do i say this nicely....the flight crew were yapping the whole time in the forward galley. it was so absurd, that i thought it was a joke. i didnt know how to tell them to be quiet, and i should have. i kept yelling "shhhh" then if they looked my way, i pretended it wasnt me, but they didnt get the hint. how would other Anetters handle this.. needless to say, i suffered the whole way listening to them talk about everything from their dogs, to their grandkids(yes, old f/a's), to even hearing them discuss union issues.

61 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineFlyf15 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 1, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10339 times:

Make your point to the airline by flying another airline. If enough people do so, the airline will change. Its how a free market economy works. If you don't want to fly another airline, then obviously... even though the FAs are doing this... American is offering you a better product/price than the competition. In that case, if you want better, you're going to have to pay more.

User currently offlineEWRCabincrew From United States of America, joined May 2006, 5527 posts, RR: 56
Reply 2, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10318 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Thread starter):
how do i say this nicely

Very simple. Go up to the flight attendant(s), say something like "excuse me" or "pardon me", "I am sitting in __ and I can hear your entire conversation, would you mind being a little quieter" or "your conversation that is a bit loud is also offensive.". If that doesn't work, go to the purser or lead flight attendant.

As for this:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Thread starter):
i kept yelling "shhhh" then if they looked my way, i pretended it wasnt me,

Don't use passive/aggressive behavior, regardless of how much you paid for your ticket. Be straight forward with any complaints you may have.

I take constructive feedback rather well, especially if it brought directly to my attention.

Honesty is always the best policy.



You can't cure stupid
User currently offlineOHLHD From Finland, joined Dec 2004, 3962 posts, RR: 25
Reply 3, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10286 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Thread starter):
the flight crew were yapping the whole time in the forward galley. it was so absurd, that i thought it was a joke



Quoting EWRCabincrew (Reply 2):
"I am sitting in __ and I can hear your entire conversation, would you mind being a little quieter" or "your conversation that is a bit loud is also offensive.". If that doesn't work, go to the purser or lead flight attendant.

I was about to write the same. Rude behavior will get you nowhere but just like if you are at work just tell the people in a nice way. I have done that too and the crew apologized.

As for me I always get the crew with a smile.  Smile


User currently offlineMir From United States of America, joined Jan 2004, 21865 posts, RR: 55
Reply 4, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10266 times:

Quoting EWRCabincrew (Reply 2):
Very simple. Go up to the flight attendant(s), say something like "excuse me" or "pardon me", "I am sitting in __ and I can hear your entire conversation, would you mind being a little quieter" or "your conversation that is a bit loud is also offensive.". If that doesn't work, go to the purser or lead flight attendant.

 checkmark  That's all it takes.

-Mir



7 billion, one nation, imagination...it's a beautiful day
User currently offlineBicoastal From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 5, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10251 times:

Simple. Talk to them. Tell them you are trying to work/sleep/meditate, etc. and ask them to keep their voices down. They will respect that. Most, on longhauls, have downtime between meal/beverage service when passengers are sleeping. The FAs then congregate with their coworkers to hangout....often in first, but also in the rear. I flew ICN-SFO in UA First...a nice first class pod....once and asked the FAs to keep their voices down. They profusely apologized and I had no problem.

On the other hand, if they ignore your request.,then you complain like hell to the purser and to any management that will listen when you land.

Don't be afraid.


User currently offlineEWRCabincrew From United States of America, joined May 2006, 5527 posts, RR: 56
Reply 6, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10251 times:

Quoting OHLHD (Reply 3):
I have done that too and the crew apologized.

100% of the time. Sometimes we become unaware of how loud we are (the noise of the aircraft, other people). By all means let us know. We are not untouchable, unapproachable or above it all. We are simply human. Fallible like you.

Common sense works everytime.



You can't cure stupid
User currently offlineBoeingForEver From United States of America, joined Dec 2004, 219 posts, RR: 0
Reply 7, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10235 times:

you see that the canadian and the dutch nationals answered me on how to address them nicely. obviously, they havent flown an american legacy carrier recently. the older FA's w seniority do anything but work on the flights

User currently offlineEWRCabincrew From United States of America, joined May 2006, 5527 posts, RR: 56
Reply 8, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10221 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Reply 7):
obviously, they havent flown an american legacy carrier recently.

For the record, I work for CO. 21 years. ISM (purser). EWR based at that. It has nothing to do with the carrier, but everything to do with common decency, common sense and being polite (from both sides).

[Edited 2007-10-19 16:20:22]


You can't cure stupid
User currently offlineBicoastal From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 9, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10189 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Reply 7):
the older FA's w seniority do anything but work on the flights

That is a gross generalization and similar to using the N word, C word or other negative derogatory nouns. The majority of older FAs are wonderful, professional, safety conscious, and excellent. You are stereotyping which is offensive. Thank you to the many many experienced flight attendants who make my trips special.


User currently offlineDutchjet From Netherlands, joined Oct 2000, 7864 posts, RR: 56
Reply 10, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 10163 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Thread starter):
i kept yelling "shhhh" then if they looked my way, i pretended it wasnt me, but they didnt get the hint. how would other Anetters handle this..

Funny, per your profile, you are 36-45, and a VP (I assume that means that you are the vice president of something) and dont know how to properly tell someone that their behavior is disturbing you? Seems a bit odd to me. And, you were going SSHH and then pretending it wasn't you......that sounds like something a 5 year old would do.

Quoting EWRCabincrew (Reply 6):
100% of the time. Sometimes we become unaware of how loud we are (the noise of the aircraft, other people). By all means let us know. We are not untouchable, unapproachable or above it all. We are simply human. Fallible like you.

Very valid point.

Quoting BoeingForEver (Reply 7):
you see that the canadian and the dutch nationals answered me on how to address them nicely. obviously, they havent flown an american legacy carrier recently. the older FA's w seniority do anything but work on the flights

Should their be an emergency or an accident, its those older FA's w/seniority that will save your life. Come to Holland, maybe we can teach YOU some manners. I cross the Atlantic with US legacy carriers more than 20 times per year, and fly within the US frequently, and most (not all) F/A work very very hard indeed.

Now, SSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHH........


User currently offlineBoeingForEver From United States of America, joined Dec 2004, 219 posts, RR: 0
Reply 11, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 10091 times:

Quoting Dutchjet (Reply 10):

Should their be an emergency or an accident, its those older FA's w/seniority that will save your life. Come to Holland, maybe we can teach YOU some manners. I cross the Atlantic with US legacy carriers more than 20 times per year, and fly within the US frequently, and most (not all) F/A work very very hard indeed.

crossing the atlantic is much different flying experience that flying domestic on legacy carriers..just look at the cabin difference between AAs international 767s and their domestic 767s


User currently offlineEWRCabincrew From United States of America, joined May 2006, 5527 posts, RR: 56
Reply 12, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 10018 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Reply 11):
just look at the cabin difference between AAs international 767s and their domestic 767s

Cabin differences should not be the litmus test on how to approach a situation. Crew should act accordingly on a domestic sector the way they act on an international one and vice versa. In other words, the one and the same. The only differences being length of time in the air and food service provided.

I can only speak for myself, but the customer service you get from me is the same from a 24 minute flight or a 17 hour flight and regardless of how much you paid for your ticket. That is what is expected of me by the customer. That is what you get 100% of the time.

Maybe I should set my standards high of the customer.

Back to topic, use honesty. Approach any situation with politeness. A smile never hurts.



You can't cure stupid
User currently offlineLuv2fly From United States of America, joined May 2003, 12150 posts, RR: 49
Reply 13, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 9952 times:

I think the best way to handle this situation is, handle it like you would want to be treated if it was you being asked to keep your voice down. In other words you can catch more bees with sugar than you can with vinegar.


You can cut the irony with a knife
User currently offlineUncleBuck From United States of America, joined Aug 2007, 121 posts, RR: 0
Reply 14, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 9905 times:

Quoting Flyf15 (Reply 1):
Make your point to the airline by flying another airline. If enough people do so, the airline will change.

i'm sorry, i don't see any correlation between him flying another airline and the F/A's talking. i highly doubt that management will think losing business (which they probably won't, as most his points are with AA and he won't want to start over) has anything to do with "galley gossip".

Quoting Bicoastal (Reply 5):
Simple. Talk to them. Tell them you are trying to work/sleep/meditate, etc. and ask them to keep their voices down. They will respect that. Most, on longhauls, have downtime between meal/beverage service when passengers are sleeping.

i completely, 100% agree with this. sometimes with the stresses of the job, and whatnot, we need to vent to each other and tend not to realize how loud we are because we are competing with engine noise. just tell us (politely) you don't wish to hear our conversation, and we will apologize and be more careful. and hey, you might even get a free drink from us just to appease you and make sure you don't have any negative feelings towards us or the airline.


User currently offlineFlyboyOz From Australia, joined Nov 2000, 1987 posts, RR: 25
Reply 15, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 9 hours ago) and read 9662 times:

oh ...you were a first class pax...Yes, you should tell cabin crews to keep quiet and then they will respect you because you paid lots of money for them and the cabin crews' job is to respect pax, make pax feel more comfortable as if you were at home and be friendly with the first class pax. However, I am not sure whether they were very friendly with you or not. I have seen lots of cabin crews were friendly and so helpful and made me feel comfortable. If i could hear the noise from the gallery, I will speak to the my friendly cabin crew (who served me, talked to me many times and looked after me a lot - I mean a person you know), She will go to the galley to tell their colleagues to keep quiet. Then you would be fine...and sleep peacefully.

In the CX aircraft, there's a placment which is said that "Please do not talk so loudly otherwise you will disturb our pax" inside the galley.



The Spirit of AustraliAN - Longreach
User currently offlineEWRCabincrew From United States of America, joined May 2006, 5527 posts, RR: 56
Reply 16, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 9 hours ago) and read 9628 times:

Quoting FlyboyOz (Reply 15):
oh ...you were a first class pax...

First class or coach. $4500 dollars or a free reward ticket. Doesn't matter where you sit. Be proactive and be polite.



You can't cure stupid
User currently offlineAa757first From United States of America, joined Aug 2003, 3350 posts, RR: 7
Reply 17, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 9 hours ago) and read 9601 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Reply 7):
you see that the canadian and the dutch nationals answered me on how to address them nicely. obviously, they havent flown an american legacy carrier recently. the older FA's w seniority do anything but work on the flights

I agree that's an awkward situation, but if you're polite and disarming about it, I can't imagine most people having a problem with it. And even if they do, what are they going to do to you?

Quoting Bicoastal (Reply 9):

That is a gross generalization and similar to using the N word, C word or other negative derogatory nouns. The majority of older FAs are wonderful, professional, safety conscious, and excellent. You are stereotyping which is offensive. Thank you to the many many experienced flight attendants who make my trips special.

Its nothing like a racial slur at all.


User currently offlineWolborsk From Guam, joined Aug 2006, 34 posts, RR: 0
Reply 18, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 1 hour ago) and read 9060 times:

If they're really obnoxious, tell them. But, try to put yourself in their shoes. The nicest thing to do would probably be to ask them to take their conversation to the rear galley. If it's not that bad, ignore it. I once had an F/A who kept thinking that these two women sitting next to me were my girlfriends. I just ignored him, and he stopped.

User currently offlineOrion737 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 19, posted (7 years 2 months 5 days 1 hour ago) and read 9022 times:

we have a lovely saying here in the north 'shut your cake hole' haha

User currently offlineLongHauler From Canada, joined Mar 2004, 5157 posts, RR: 43
Reply 20, posted (7 years 2 months 4 days 22 hours ago) and read 7839 times:

I am guessing they were not aware they were being loud. The forward galley of an aircraft can be quite noisy due to wind noise with the curvature of the fuselage, as well as leaky door seals on older aircraft. A very simple "excuse me, but maybe you don't know everyone can hear your conversation" would not only work, but would probably be appreciated.

I remember years ago flying on a Midwest Express DC-9 from YYZ to MKE. After meal service, one of the flight attendants was telling the other about a tryst she had had with the First Officer on a previous layover. Being in the noisy galley of the old DC-9-10, they had to yell to hear each other. Back in the quiet cabin, the front half of the aircraft were quiet entertained!!!



Never gonna grow up, never gonna slow down .... Barefoot Blue Jean Night
User currently offlineBullpitt From Spain, joined Mar 2004, 871 posts, RR: 8
Reply 21, posted (7 years 2 months 4 days 22 hours ago) and read 7787 times:

Hi all

First of all you must take into consideration that what to you is the inside of an airplane. To those FA's it's their work place. How would you like it if someone came into your office and told you to shut up? As workers they have a right to some rest, to talk to their fellow work mates as people do in any work place. You see FA' s also have to work in the galleys, they have food to prepare and other chores to do while they do that they can talk with each other as other people do while working. They're not slaves, they don't have to bow to anyone. What they have to do is serve and do their job the best they can. Some people confuse service with being Servile.



These are my principles but if you don't like them I have others
User currently offlineJFKPurser From United States of America, joined Mar 2007, 486 posts, RR: 4
Reply 22, posted (7 years 2 months 4 days 21 hours ago) and read 7477 times:

If you ask nicely, in a non-confrontational way with a smile and come from your needs, we will do just about anything for you, as long as you are not asking us to bend the rules (even then, sometimes we will if what you want is not unreasonable and we like you).

It can be irritating when you hear us talking about our wierd dating habits, contract issues, bunions, hystorectomies and such. Just politely explain, "By the way -- did you know that I can hear EVERYTHING you are saying ?". That ought to shut us up! I wouldn't want everyone in FC knowing about my personal issues, so if a passenger told me that they were finding all of that out unbeknownst to me, I would be most appreciative.

Galleys are loud and sometimes we have trouble hearing well in them.


User currently offlineRussianJet From Belgium, joined Jul 2007, 7719 posts, RR: 21
Reply 23, posted (7 years 2 months 4 days 21 hours ago) and read 7342 times:

Quoting BoeingForEver (Thread starter):
i kept yelling "shhhh" then if they looked my way, i pretended it wasnt me,

That's absolutely hilarious. However, I have to say I'm not surprised it didn't work. Is that really the best plan you could come up with?  Smile

Quoting EWRCabincrew (Reply 2):
Don't use passive/aggressive behavior,

Yeah right, ok Sigmund - he was only yelling "shhh".



✈ Every strike of the hammer is a blow against the enemy. ✈
User currently offlineEWRCabincrew From United States of America, joined May 2006, 5527 posts, RR: 56
Reply 24, posted (7 years 2 months 4 days 21 hours ago) and read 7136 times:

Quoting RussianJet (Reply 23):
Yeah right, ok Sigmund - he was only yelling "shhh".

Ok, you know what I mean.



You can't cure stupid
25 Jetstar : I had the same problem a few years ago on AA returning from LA to JFK on the red eye. I was sitting in the emergency exit row which and the economy ca
26 Super98 : No, that's not all it takes. Especially if it's a couple of gay F/As and one or more is OTR and they want everyone to know about it. That's gets to be
27 Tonystan : How rude!!!! This is exactly something I would expect on a flight to/from the USA where some peoples manners are severly lacking!!! Just come out and
28 EWRCabincrew : Men menstruate? Yes, that is all it takes. Don't let personal prejudices override common sense.
29 SupraZachAir : I was expecting a funny punchline from the thread title...
30 Dutchjet : He is rude, what about you........all Americans are lacking in manners? Americans are frequently in the minority on many transatlantic flights and th
31 Coal : To the OP: If a "shhh" didn't do the trick, I would've demanded to speak to the Chief Purser. If this didn't work, I would get their name and then rep
32 RussianJet : Yeah, I know what you mean - you hear something you don't like or have anyone object in any way and immediately cry "passive agressive". It's a pathe
33 Tonystan : I was brought up with impeccable manners thank you!!!!! And you will notice if you reread my original post that I said "some peoples" manners are sev
34 Dutchjet : Oh, good for you, aren't you special. What an astute observation.....have you ever travelled on a European holiday flight headed to the Canaries or M
35 CO767FA : Isn't this truly a cultural issue? Acceptable etiquette by one group maybe offensive to another; why is it so difficult for people to educate themsel
36 Reggaebird : I recently flew JFK-LGW in the Delta Airlines BusinessElite cabin. The purser (lead attendant) was a lovely lady but she had the most childish, annoyi
37 Post contains images Dubliftment : sorry, but: why "even"? are union issues something you're less supposed to talk about than about other issues? Ah OK, didn't know that.
38 Letsgetwet : There are rude and lazy people everywhere, ... judging you by your comments ... you are likely one of them!
39 PlanenutzTB : I fly F a lot and don't understand how you could hear a conversation in the galley. With the jet and wind noise I can see the FA's talking but don't h
40 Xtoler : Flying regional in a 50 pax cabin, usually it's just me. Sometimes I'll have a deadheading F/A or I'll be deadheading and usually help each other out.
41 Post contains images EWRCabincrew : Hardly. What is pathetic is people who resort to not standing up for themselves and when they try, they resort to a Like yelling shhhhhhhh. Things li
42 Post contains images RussianJet : Hmm, do people say that to you a lot?
43 Post contains images EWRCabincrew : Never. I know enough to be appropriate in my surroundings and be considerate of others. Basic common sense and basic customer service. Should someone
44 Post contains images RussianJet : Ha ha, good answer - fair enough pal. My favourite part of the originating post is the fact that he pretented it wasn't him. That truly conjures up s
45 Jetdeltamsy : If you have truly pondered this question for any length of time, you have too much time on your hands. Be a man, get up and tell them their chatty be
46 Flyprivate : You kidding me!!!! confront a flight attendent on an american carrier!! and tell them they are bothering you - They will get you arrested!! please - i
47 Dutchjet : I guess thats why you....Flyprivate.
48 Jetdeltamsy : an equally absurd observation. If someone present themsevles in a dangerous, threatening or hostile manner, then someone might call the police. You h
49 FlyPrivate : you obviously don't fly enough! many times i have seen flight attendants threaten to have passengers arrested for the most non-threatening actions.
50 Jetdeltamsy : I recently retired from 25 years of flying for major US airlines. Most airlines do not allow their flight attendants to contact the authorities on th
51 Post contains images EWRCabincrew : Yours and mine both. I'm afraid how you ask for water, then.. It's all in the approach. Not unique to the airline industry.
52 Post contains images Coal : It's just a kind reminder Did I say there are rude people only in one specific part of the world? No. My point is that when you are flying C or F, yo
53 UncleBuck : right, and the US government handflew the planes into the twin towers. give me a break.
54 Post contains images EWRCabincrew : Gross generalisation. Like saying passengers are pompous, whiny and demanding. Completely untrue.
55 Neuroticdave : "Excuse me ma'am, I couldnt help but overhear your conversation with your fellow flight attendants. I was just wondering if you could please lower you
56 EWRCabincrew : Yet another good way.
57 MotorHussy : Eeavesdrop on a conversation long enough to find out something they may not wish you to know then summon with the in-seat crew call button. When one a
58 Tonystan : And not all Irish people work for Irish airlines...OOOH,SHOCK HORROR....expand your mind!!! And yes, I have done the bucket and spade routes in my ti
59 Tonystan : Indeed you are absolutely correct! For example, passengers from the Indian subcontinent are not known for their "please and thank yous" and could eas
60 Dutchjet : And I take orders from you because? I am not surprised. Do it politely, however. Now, YOU move along. Another thread?
61 Post contains images CygnusChicago : Strange, I thought one of the benefits of Boeing aircraft is that the excellent white noise drowns out the conversations of others and thus passengers
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