Sponsor Message:
Non Aviation Forum
My Starred Topics | Profile | New Topic | Forum Index | Help | Search 
Can Santa Really Visit Every House?  
User currently offlineSouthwestMDW From United States of America, joined Dec 2003, 303 posts, RR: 1
Posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 1911 times:

This was sent in an e-mail to me, thought I would pass it on. Pretty funny.

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 1 in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.
Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second.

This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.

This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element.

Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them... Santa would need 360,000 of them.

This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch). 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake.

The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

17 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineGo3Team From United States of America, joined Mar 2004, 3267 posts, RR: 16
Reply 1, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 1905 times:

Great job, you spoiled Christmas for me.  Smile


Yay Pudding!
User currently offlineJalto27R From United States of America, joined May 2004, 857 posts, RR: 14
Reply 2, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 1893 times:

Hahahaha I saw that before, but it still makes me laugh like crazy.

Mike


User currently offlineSchoenorama From Spain, joined Apr 2001, 2440 posts, RR: 25
Reply 3, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 1893 times:

I believe I read this article in Flight International or some other UK flight magazine a couple of years ago.

Nice to see it here again though.



Utinam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant!
User currently offlineDtwclipper From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 4, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 1886 times:

Wow, that's a lot of Worldperk Miles, as I assume Santa is a member of Skyteam and we multiply that by the number of deer pulling his sled and SuperPlatinumElite Status!

User currently offlineAsstChiefMark From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 5, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 1851 times:

Santa died in 1999. He got way behind on deliveries that year. He got into too much of a hurry and got sloppy. He exceeded the maximum recommended speed for the sleigh. Here's proof of his demise.



User currently offlineAirlinelover From United States of America, joined Jun 2001, 5580 posts, RR: 22
Reply 6, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 12 hours ago) and read 1820 times:

Santa uses the time machine that Scotty is always trying to find..

Chris



Lets do some sexy math. We add you, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and multiply
User currently offlineYegmaster From Canada, joined Dec 2004, 1023 posts, RR: 0
Reply 7, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 11 hours ago) and read 1811 times:

What are we saying here? Santa doesn't exsist? crying 

User currently offlineSaxdiva From United States of America, joined Jun 2004, 2382 posts, RR: 41
Reply 8, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 6 hours ago) and read 1782 times:

Quoting Yegmaster (Reply 7):
What are we saying here? Santa doesn't exsist?

Thwack!



User currently offlinePyrex From Portugal, joined Aug 2005, 4022 posts, RR: 28
Reply 9, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 1763 times:

Quoting AsstChiefMark (Reply 5):
He exceeded the maximum recommended speed for the sleigh.

Was that MMO or VMO?



Read this very carefully, I shall write this only once!
User currently offlineNighthawk From UK - Scotland, joined Sep 2001, 5151 posts, RR: 33
Reply 10, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 1754 times:

is santas sleigh ETOPS 120 or ETOPS 330 ?


That'll teach you
User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 11, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 1748 times:

Santa's ordered an Airbus A350 - nah nah nah

 duck 



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlineHAWK21M From India, joined Jan 2001, 31684 posts, RR: 56
Reply 12, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 2 hours ago) and read 1735 times:

Santa's Watching & hes annoyed.No gift for you this Christmas  biggrin 
regds
MEL



Think of the brighter side!
User currently offlineOly720man From United Kingdom, joined May 2004, 6729 posts, RR: 11
Reply 13, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 2 hours ago) and read 1735 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 11):
Santa's ordered an Airbus A350 - nah nah nah

A380F surely?



wheat and dairy can screw up your brain
User currently offlineAirEuropeUK733 From United Kingdom, joined Apr 2004, 978 posts, RR: 10
Reply 14, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 2 hours ago) and read 1734 times:

What? You mean Santa doesn't exist?

 Sad  Sad  Sad

AE733



It's nice to fly with friends
User currently offlineME AVN FAN From Switzerland, joined May 2002, 13920 posts, RR: 25
Reply 15, posted (8 years 9 months 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1726 times:

Quoting SouthwestMDW (Thread starter):
the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million

as Santa Claus in many countries like Switzerland is "enroute" on Santa-Claus-Day on 6th December and then leaves the Christmas-job to the "Christ-Child" (Chrisch-Chindli in Switzerland), the "workload" you mention gets reduced further !


User currently offlineBigOrange From United States of America, joined Apr 2004, 2365 posts, RR: 3
Reply 16, posted (8 years 9 months 15 hours ago) and read 1697 times:

You forgot about Jehovah's so how many kids does that reduce the total by.

Answers by 12 noon EST 23 December  Wink


User currently offlineBigOrange From United States of America, joined Apr 2004, 2365 posts, RR: 3
Reply 17, posted (8 years 9 months 15 hours ago) and read 1696 times:

You forgot about Jehovah's so how many kids does that reduce the total by.

Who's going to work out all these calculations to take that into account?

Answers by 12 noon EST 23 December  Wink


Top Of Page
Forum Index

This topic is archived and can not be replied to any more.

Printer friendly format

Similar topics:More similar topics...
Can Pheromones Really Spice Up Your Sex Life? posted Mon Oct 31 2005 06:34:25 by Alberchico
Can Egging Really Ruin Car Paint? posted Mon Mar 1 2004 00:48:15 by FSPilot747
Can Aspirin Really Prevent A Heart Attack? posted Thu May 10 2001 09:24:41 by 757PF
I Can See My House From Here! posted Sun Jul 2 2006 22:23:45 by JGPH1A
Maybe I Really Can Get Into Figure Skating posted Mon Feb 20 2006 04:50:46 by YeahitsK
I Really Can't Be Bothered To . . . posted Mon Jan 9 2006 15:00:36 by DrP
I Can See My House From Here! posted Thu Apr 14 2005 23:30:00 by LHMARK
How Can I Move Out The House? posted Fri Feb 11 2005 12:30:09 by Planespotterx
Terraserver: Can You Find Your House? posted Mon Nov 22 2004 07:08:32 by BCAInfoSys
What Can No Sleep And Lots Of Coffee Really Do? posted Mon May 17 2004 17:50:08 by Moolies