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Inventive Procrastination

Pe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 18883 posts, RR: 54
Posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 653 times:

Inventive procrastination is a job per se. Now, what innovative ideas have you had in your quest to achieve a degree in Inventive Procrastination?

"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."

27 replies: All unread, showing first 25:

Skidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 60
Reply 1, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 645 times:

Dear Lord, is there no end to the drivel coming from this, er, person? Big grin

You are the king of procrastination James. The rest of us can't hold a candle to your continual stream of complete crap!

Have a nice day Big grin

Andy

Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 2, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 645 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Thread starter):
Inventive procrastination is a job per se

An important part of working in a consultancy.
i'm procrastinating on your project - that'll be 1000 pounds please Mr Client Big grin

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

Pe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 18883 posts, RR: 54
Reply 3, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 640 times:

Quoting Skidmarks (Reply 1):
Dear Lord, is there no end to the drivel coming from this, er, person?

You are the king of procrastination James. The rest of us can't hold a candle to your continual stream of complete crap!

Have a nice day

"Even if you only pissed people off at least you made a difference." Wink

"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."

WhiteHatter From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 4, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 635 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 2):
i'm procrastinating on your project - that'll be 1000 pounds please Mr Client

more like ten bob and a can of Stella.

Anyway procrastination is the mother of invention. People will always find new and inventive ways of wasting time when supposed to be working. It's genetic.

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 5, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 635 times:

Quoting WhiteHatter (Reply 4):
Quoting Cornish (Reply 2):
i'm procrastinating on your project - that'll be 1000 pounds please Mr Client

more like ten bob and a can of Stella.

no really that's my chargable daily rate !!! Trusting fools Wink

If only i was getting PAID that daily. Sad

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

WhiteHatter From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 6, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 630 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 5):

If only i was getting PAID that daily.

If only I was getting PAID.

Some arse screwed up the accounts again last month and I never got my exes.

Skidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 60
Reply 7, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 616 times:

Quoting WhiteHatter (Reply 6):
Some arse screwed up the accounts again last month and I never got my exes.

Some of us don't get expenses Sad

Or a pay rise Sad

Or sex

Ah well, roll on home-time. Time for Pizza and red wine! Big grin

Andy

Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional

9VSPO From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 8, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 616 times:

I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task. Wink

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 9, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 609 times:

Quoting 9VSPO (Reply 8):
I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task.

and then remember to delegate the bulk of the work of the greater task to someone junior so that you can take on a strategic "project management" role Wink

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

Skidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 60
Reply 10, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 606 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 9):
and then remember to delegate the bulk of the work of the greater task to someone junior so that you can take on a strategic "project management" role

Euphamism for "Lazy Git"? Big grin

Andy

Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 11, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 603 times:

Quoting Skidmarks (Reply 10):
Euphamism for "Lazy Git"?

Nope - just inventive procrastination Big grin

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

Skidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 60
Reply 12, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 599 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 11):
Nope - just inventive procrastination

Touche!!!

Bah Humbug!

Andy old

Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional

Pe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 18883 posts, RR: 54
Reply 13, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 595 times:

Taking what we have already had...

---

Regarding inventive procrastination, I obey section 11 of the Intentive Procrasination Act 1519. This is following inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task. Section 11(a) of that 1519 Act states that you must remember to delegate the bulk of the work of the greater task to someone junior so that you can take on a strategic "project management" role. This is not, contrary to popular belief, a euphamism for "Lazy Git" - it is simply effective time-management.

---

Any more?

I don't like 'it is simply effective time-management.' Any alternatives?

[Edited 2006-02-03 16:44:11]

"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 14, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 593 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 13):
Any more?

I think that sums it up nicely Big grin

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

Skidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 60
Reply 15, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 583 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 14):

I think that sums it up nicely

Thereby proving Pe@rson is the spawn of Cornish's loins Big grin

However unlikely that may seem!!

Andy old

Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional

Pe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 18883 posts, RR: 54
Reply 16, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 583 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 13):
I don't like 'it is simply effective time-management.' Any alternatives?

It's gone small again. hissyfit

I'm sounding like Cornish's partner when he sees Cornish's whatsit. Sad

"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 17, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 579 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 16):
It's gone small again. I'm sounding like Cornish's partner when he sees Cornish's whatsit.

By whatsit, you mean my ultra small fold away mini tripod for the camera of course Wink

Everything else in my life is nice n large thank you (except my waistline - and that's expanding)

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

9VSPO From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 18, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 22 hours ago) and read 567 times:

I've got the day off as you can see...

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 19, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 564 times:

Quoting 9VSPO (Reply 18):

One assumes James is not up for an Oscar this year - after all its not like he needed to act..... Wink

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

Pe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 18883 posts, RR: 54
Reply 20, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 558 times:

9V.

I hasten to add that my nose is not unusually large in real life; indeed, it was just the close-up and weird angle of that shot. Another part of my body is unusually big, though.

"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."

Aleksandar From Serbia, joined Jul 2000, 3229 posts, RR: 34
Reply 21, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 557 times:

Quoting 9VSPO (Reply 18):

UGLY, UGLY, hissyfit

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Cornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 55
Reply 22, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 557 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 20):
I hasten to add that my nose is not unusually large in real life;

although its growing as you write Wink

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 20):
Another part of my body is unusually big, though.

you mean you're as fat as JGP ??? Wow!

Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work

Jasepl From India, joined Jul 2004, 3582 posts, RR: 44
Reply 23, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 557 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 20):
Another part of my body is unusually big, though.

You consider 5 inches to be unusually large? confused

Did you repeatedly fail maths too? Wink

Pe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 18883 posts, RR: 54
Reply 24, posted (7 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 552 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 22):
although its growing as you write

Never!

Quoting Jasepl (Reply 23):
You consider 5 inches to be unusually large?

No. Do you honestly think anyone would be sad enough to post their real size on an Internet forum? If you do, think again (well, for me anyway). And it's .5".

"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."

Pe@rson: Don't be so hard on Cage. It's not his fault he has to compete with me.

Aleksandar: I MEANT THE GUY IN THE MIDDLE Can someone shoot him, please

Jasepl: It's okay James. You wouldn't be the only one. It's common enough that they even have a name for it. Look it up: micropenis.

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