Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2928 times:
So you board your transatlantic flight and you notice that due to a veeeeeery veeeeeeery unlikely coincidence, every single one of the 300 passengers is an Airliners.net member. What would the flight be like?
Here's what I think:
- Much lower stress for the cabin crew, because most of us don't ever give them a hard time, because we know what they're going through
- Everybody pays attention to the safety demo, although we've all heard it 100 times
- Plane will be looted of safety cards, pillows and other assorted service items
- Nobody will complain about anything, except the Germans in case it is Lufthansa
What else? Post!
(Btw, the cabin crew and the pilots are A.netters too, and even the ATC)
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
Aloges From Germany, joined Jan 2006, 8358 posts, RR: 47 Reply 2, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2925 times:
Quoting Birdwatching (Thread starter): - Much lower stress for the cabin crew, because most of us don't ever give them a hard time, because we know what they're going through
- Everybody pays attention to the safety demo, although we've all heard it 100 times
You really live in your own la-la-land, don't you?
With the amount of whiny my-daddy-knows-you-boss teenagers etc. I've seen the last time I browsed through gen_av, that flight would have to be pure hell for the attendants. Sad, but true... although I'm sure if you pick the right people, the real enthusiasts, the flight would be a lot of fun for everyone involved.
Walk together, talk together all ye peoples of the earth. Then, and only then, shall ye have peace.
Nighthawk From UK - Scotland, joined Sep 2001, 4991 posts, RR: 38 Reply 8, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2893 times:
300 passengers all banging on the cockpit door asking for a shot in the jumpseat or claiming to be an expert pilot after playing flightsim for a few hours, thats what it would be really like.
Carmenlu15 From Guatemala, joined Dec 2004, 4688 posts, RR: 35 Reply 9, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2885 times:
As Aloges said, it's all about picking the right people... else we'd have 300 teenage armchair CEO's telling the real pilots and cabin crew how they should do their job!
Though I'd surely love to be on such a flight
Quoting Kazzie (Reply 3): we have done 16 anetters on an A340
Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Reply 11, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2876 times:
Quoting Kazzie (Reply 3): we have done 16 anetters on an A340
Busy girl Kazzie eh?
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
British767 From United Kingdom, joined Nov 2005, 284 posts, RR: 23 Reply 13, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2876 times:
It'd be horrible, what with all the know-it-alls telling everybody else (including crew) how they know a lot more about the plane/aircraft then they do.
There would be endless picture taking, which would all most likely end up getting given baddoubles on A.net!
BristolFlyer From United Kingdom, joined May 2004, 2135 posts, RR: 0 Reply 14, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2876 times:
ANCFlyer and Itsjustme as the undercover agents onboard ready to give 'what for' to anyone who steps out of line ...Gkirk serving the drinks (and having one for everyone he gives out) ...somebody listening to James Blunt & Celine Dion on the entertainment system...WellHung trying it on with the ladies ...Skiddy being helped on to the plane before everyone else ...the list goes on...
And about 293 other people having an A vs B argument
Kazzie From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR: Reply 15, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2859 times:
Quoting British767 (Reply 13): It'd be horrible, what with all the know-it-alls telling everybody else (including crew) how they know a lot more about the plane/aircraft then they do.
Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Reply 18, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 2828 times:
Quoting Kazzie (Reply 15): Kazzie From United Kingdom, joined Apr 2006, 167 posts
Quoting Kazzie (Reply 15): you are all a bunch of n00bs...
Who's the N0000000b?
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
Texan From New Zealand, joined Dec 2003, 4204 posts, RR: 53 Reply 21, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 4 hours ago) and read 2811 times:
- Why not a 777? Are you prejudiced against Boeing
- 300 people saying that there should be new nonstop A340 service from their crappy hometown airport to a city they would like to fly to because there is obviously demand since they would fly it if their parents would pay for their tickets
- ANCFlyer would not be able to bring enough ammunition
- STLGph would be very happy
- I cannot believe that we aren't being comped first class seats
- And what's with the in flight food? We demand salmon and filet mignon! And serve it on China!
- What do you mean we are being unruly? You didn't serve us the food we wanted, we should receive free booze!
- Well, you can't reallyturn this plane around and land it because I've tried it before on flight sim and you'll have to circle for at least an hour and a half to burn off enough weight
- No, seriously, I can fly this plane!
- No, the captain will not come back and talk with you
- STLGph, stop dancing on the food carts!
- Atrude777, you too!
- No, Kirkie, sheep are not carry on items
- You still cannot sit in first class
"We are beginning our descent into Hell..."
Texan
"I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library."
Skidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 60 Reply 24, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 4 hours ago) and read 2775 times:
This has to be one of my worst nightmares!!!!
Fortunately I don't fly enough long distance flights to worry about having to share the flight with 300 complete loonies!
Mind you, YYZ should be a hoot !
Andy
Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
25 GOCAPS16: One juicy fart from me, everyone in business class will run back to economy class. Kevin
26 Birdwatching: We'd all be quietly in our seats... ... on our laptops, all posting in NonAv through the Conexxion satellite internet. Soren
27 Birdwatching: Who says you're in Biz? All the first class members are in the premium cabins, the others in eco, and the grandfathered members in the cargo hold. So
28 MattRB: - plane having to divert and several assault/battery charges being laid due to BvA/Wright/NW DC-9/I Hate/Love GWB arguments that got away..
29 AsstChiefMark: I think the cabin crew would be busy assembling a few of these. Mark
30 Wingscrubber: This particular A340 ride would be a non-aviation one though right? We'd all be talking about non-aviation related topics?
31 Nighthawk: Us grandfather members made this site what it is........show some respect! First class for us...
32 Mhodgson: But you're non-revs, so you go wherever there is space.
33 Daleaholic: People would set their camera's down, then somebody picks up the wrong one and it leads to an all out High in the sky brawl!
34 BMIFlyer: I'm sure we would have a great time eh? Lee
35 FRAspotter: Maybe not during the flight, but once the plane lands, there would be 300 trip reports posted in the forum. That would not be fun...
36 Saxdiva: Somebody would wonder what effect everyone flapping our arms would have one the plane's lift. After making a P.A. announcement to that effect, they'd
37 Atrude777: SHUT UP! While you Texan go around and get signature for your next senator role Alex
38 Texan: Hey now, you know damn well I couldn't afford to be on a flight like that even if I wanted to And no more dancing in the aisles!!! Texan
39 DesertJets: All us cool a.netters will be sitting in the back of the plane w/ the bar cart next to us mixing a neverending pitcher of bloody mary's while we watch
40 Dan2002: I didnt know you could ride on a graphics card
41 Atrude777: Right, just get those signatures *stops dancing* WHAT?! awww damn! Alex
42 2H4: Yes...it would be wise to avoid the Tech/Ops flight. Invariably, thousands and thousands of birds would be brought onboard as carry-on, and the aircr
43 Aloges: Although we would have trouble agreeing on take-off if we somehow got on a moving conveyor belt during taxi.
44 Greyhound: Just one note... That turbulence was George Bush's fault... just picture that argument
45 JAGflyer: How many A.netters does it take to rent/fly an A340? 300: 2 to rent it 10 to crew it 4 to load and fuel it 50 to complain about the slow climb perform
46 NWOrientDC10: I wonder who would be relegated to the middle seats in the center section? Good Day Russell
47 Aloges: Hmm... something's missing. Oh yes, the woman the straight guys would require for joining the mile high club!
48 Rolfen: About 100 different videos from the same landing, that's one for each window seat on the plane.
49 WellHung: 95% of them would look something like this: If Sabena332 and Aa61hvy are on board there would certainly be no shortage of this...
50 Gkirk: Quite a few discussions about how the A340 uses the curvee of the Earth to get airborne
51 LTU932: Me too, such a flight would be kickass. And if it's Lufthansa we're flying, let's get Patrick (Sabena332) to come with us.
52 WellHung: Certainly. Can an A340 even get off the ground with 300 people on board?
53 Carmenlu15: Another thing to be considered is the seat assignment, which could turn out to be a total nightmare. Imagine the logistics of seating 300 souls, makin
54 2H4: Only crew would have access to the flight deck... 2H4
55 LTU932: And I would be demanding the window seat, next to the trailing edge of the wing.
56 Aloges: One more question that remains is: will Johan wear a mask if he joins? A la Darth Vader, "Users! I am your master!"
57 Dtwclipper: 150 arguments over the livery 80 complaints about the IFE 75 fights about the way things used to be 40 disagreements over Legacy A340 Flights and LCC
58 Boeingfanyyz: I could see a serious brawl occuring! There would be some serious A vs B wars, I'll tell you that! Cheers, Boeingfanyyz
59 AA61Hvy: Hung-odds are I'd be high even before I board the plane
60 Dtwclipper: Figures...you still haven't been able to find Any Drug Detox Drinks or pills
62 Ilikeyyc: The flight would be hell. The only way anyone could survive that flight is if people agreed to not talk about airplanes and aviation for reasons previ
63 Aero145: The flight would be nice, shutter sounds all around... Everything else you said I agree with.
65 SlamClick: 1. I don't care if we could do it over 300 segments a day, Northwest would STILL not replace their DC-9s with A-340s. 2. At least we'd know whether to
66 AirbusA346: And how to sit 300 A.netters next to a window. Tom.
67 MIAspotter: So true Yeah, no problems in serving the food since most of us know where the galleys are and know how to operate the ovens. No need for a safety dem
68 AirbusA346: This thread is so funny, because some of it is so true. Tom.
69 Carmenlu15: 299 will be enough... I'll settle for the jumpseat. Alright, who gets to be cabin crew?
70 Boeing Nut: An A vs B discussion start, within munites the aircraft would be diverted with a SWAT team standing by..... It is not often I look favorably on some o
71 AA61Hvy: Havent bought any.. Have smoked in 2 weeks exactly. Oh well. I've just been drinking more. On this flight odds are I'd be drunk or high or both. I'd
72 Aerobalance: Actually, Sherman Oaks or North Hollywood
74 FlyKev: Im just thinking about the 300 trip reports youd have to sift through on the forums. If you want to start a really good discussion on board, then make
75 Trekster: My god, this would be a good flight. The safety demo would be done hundreds of times (come on, who has wanted to do it) Sign me up FIRST CLASS, as im
76 Birdwatching: But a bunch of screaming 13year olds. Same shiat! Soren
77 FlyingColours: Oooh I call Purser I'd just lock myself in the flightdeck and leave you all to it nah, We'd have a simple service consisting of a guess the Altitude
78 2H4: I call captain. Can you say "Zero-G pushovers"? 2H4
79 Birdwatching: Sorry, not possible. Captain - Johan First Officer - Henks Skymarshall - ANCflyer Flight attendant doing the "duty free sale" (yeah right) - Sabena33
80 Carmenlu15: That ought to keep the quiet during the whole flight.
81 Redngold: All cabin crew members will be blind by the end of the flight... due to the unceasing flashes of 300 cameras. I call "talkative geek who bends your ea
82 Atrude777: I will also play deaf passenger who asks seatmate what the PA was said. Oh do we board by seat number? WIll we have assigned seats or scramble for our
83 Saxdiva: This could be a scream... 300 a.netters simultaneously performing the safety demo, clad only in life jackets, right after STLGph helps us with the ch
84 YOWza: Sparked by a "I hope this runway is long enough for this underpowered log" type comment. YOWza
85 AirbusA346: Errrrrrr. No you won't Turn the flash off then Tom.
86 DLKAPA: It would look like a young british lass named Kazzie frantically running around the aisles in a vein attempt to escape 299 horny american teenagers.
87 Greyhound: You sure about that one? Sounds like the part of the safety lecture on cabin depressurization (due to multiple bullet holes) might come in handy here
88 Carmenlu15: But in order for this to hold true, we should work under the assumption that there are at least 299 straight male a.netters. Quite frankly, I doubt t
89 Birdwatching: Every 30 seconds, you'd hear somebody say "this is the 1000th thing I said on this flight!" Soren
90 RJ111: Given the amount of stick the A340 gets on here. I'll be suprised if the fly-by-wire system doesn't fly itself into a mountain.
91 CastleIsland: Who'd be the first to take a dump on the First Class food cart?
96 Carmenlu15: Then again, as I said... Diversity should be taken into account.
97 LTU932: Indeed. However, I do want to spend some time in the cockpit as well. But since you wanted the jumpseat, let's make a deal Carmen: You get the takeof
99 RootsAir: there you go...you beat me to that one
100 ScarletHarlot: Oh! I want to do it in sign language like the lady does on the BA flights. I can sign "emergency" and "go down the slide, leaving all your bags behin
101 BA747YYZ: All too true! Do not forget Canadians complaining about AC. I see massive fights for the window seats, and devious upgrades, and the plane robbed of
103 LTU932: Actually I know I'll get the window seat. If someone wants to take it away from me, I'll just make him or her an offer he or she cannot refuse.
104 AerorobNZ: I'd be the CSA checking you all in, then weighing all the handluggage & offloading people for being late to the check in/gate etc. You'd also find tha
105 Cadet57: Hell I'd imagine There would be guards at the doors to search all passangers and remove said articles as, in the case of a US airline, the loss would
106 BCAInfoSys: Ya'll have it wrong. Seating would go based on your particular place in the a.net pecking order. Mendis would be captain (as he is still mr. RR 100),
107 ClassicLover: I'll put my hand up for cabin crew, no worries at all. There'll be no resetting of the IFE, and if you don't pay attention to the demo you will pay!
108 ScarletHarlot: Hey! Apparently I'll be Sir Stevie's seatmate!
109 CastleIsland: I'll sit anywhere as long as my scratch 'n' sniff seat cushion doubles as a flotation device.
110 BCAInfoSys: Trust me John; you won't want to be scratching or sniffing that cushion anytime I've been in the vicinity! Tonight it's a great combination of Hot Da
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From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, 
From Germany, joined Jan 2006, 8358 posts, 
From , joined Dec 1969, posts, 
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From UK - Scotland, joined Sep 2001, 4991 posts, 
From Guatemala, joined Dec 2004, 4688 posts, 
From Canada, joined Nov 2003, 6055 posts, 
From Netherlands, joined Dec 2003, 3848 posts, 
...Gkirk serving the drinks (and having one for everyone he gives out) 
...somebody 
listening to James Blunt & Celine Dion on the entertainment system...WellHung trying it on with the ladies 
...Skiddy being helped on to the plane before everyone else 
...the list goes on...
From New Zealand, joined Dec 2003, 4204 posts, 
From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, 
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