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This Year's Darwin Awards...  
User currently offlineNAV20 From Australia, joined Nov 2003, 9909 posts, RR: 36
Posted (8 years 7 months 6 days 6 hours ago) and read 1835 times:

Don't get me wrong - I love the United States (well, most of them) and always enjoy visiting.

But can any of these (mostly US-based) stories possibly be true? Or, as I suspect, are they ALL true?

">1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked..... And now, the honorable mentions:

">2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a little shopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

">3. A man who shoveled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.

">4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

">5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.

">6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change. When the clerk opened the cash drawer, he man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer...$15. (If someone points a gun at you and gives you money, is a crime committed?)

">7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some beer pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinderblock through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinderblock and heaved it over his head at the window. The cinderblock bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas. The whole event was caught on videotape.

">8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her purse and ran. The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, "Yes, officer, that's her. That's the lady I stole the purse from."

">9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan, at 5 a.m., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

">******A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER*****

">10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor home parked on a Seattle street, he got much more than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up next to a motor home near spilled sewage. A police spokesman said that the man admitted to trying to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank by mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges, saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had."



"Once you have flown, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards.." - Leonardo da Vinci
14 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineTedTAce From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 1, posted (8 years 7 months 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 1800 times:

NAV20, most of these are NOT Darwin awards, they are just dumb people. Thanks for proving how dumb Aussies can be

PS I have suggested deletion of this thread because of the deceptive, and in-accurate title.

[Edited 2006-05-27 18:56:59]

User currently offlineComorin From United States of America, joined May 2005, 4903 posts, RR: 16
Reply 2, posted (8 years 7 months 6 days ago) and read 1731 times:

How hilarious!! thanks for sharing this.

I just got back from a visit to the 'Darwin' exhibit at NY's Museum of Natural History, so I laughed even harder.


User currently offlineDamirc From Slovenia, joined Feb 2004, 726 posts, RR: 7
Reply 3, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 23 hours ago) and read 1700 times:

#4 is hilarious  Smile Imagine the predicament of the passengers  Smile)

D.


User currently offlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3772 posts, RR: 13
Reply 4, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 22 hours ago) and read 1679 times:

Are these this year's? I've read these before, like last year. Srill very funny  Smile

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineTedTAce From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 5, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 21 hours ago) and read 1651 times:

Quoting Doona (Reply 4):
like last year.

What do you expect when a hack posts a BS thread start?


User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20822 posts, RR: 62
Reply 6, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 21 hours ago) and read 1643 times:

Quoting TedTAce (Reply 5):
What do you expect when a hack posts a BS thread start?

Red wings?  duck 



International Homo of Mystery
User currently offlineQANTASFOREVER From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 7, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 1606 times:

TedTAce -

Considering most of these happened in your country, I feel I should remind you that people who live in glass houses.....


User currently offlineANCFlyer From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 8, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 18 hours ago) and read 1600 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 6):
Quoting TedTAce (Reply 5):
What do you expect when a hack posts a BS thread start?

Red wings?  duck 

 rotfl 

I do believe Westy's got a point!

These aren't new . . .

These aren't Darwin Award winners or nominees . . .

These are funny.


User currently offlineWorldXplorer From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 381 posts, RR: 0
Reply 9, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 18 hours ago) and read 1595 times:

For those of you who believe that there is group of people that go through the world to track down the world dumbest actions and them email it all out as "The Darwin Awards"...

http://www.snopes.com/horrors/freakish/darwin05.asp

WorldXplorer


User currently offlineTedTAce From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 10, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 18 hours ago) and read 1588 times:

Quoting WorldXplorer (Reply 9):
For those of you who believe that there is group of people that go through the world to track down the world dumbest actions and them email it all out as "The Darwin Awards"...

Beautiful!!

Quoting QANTASFOREVER (Reply 7):
TedTAce -

Considering most of these happened in your country, I feel I should remind you that people who live in glass houses.....

(Clearing throat) As someone who has sucessfully submitted a darwin nominee I KNOW that most of the above do not even come close to qualifying. Unless the author was speaking euphimistically:

Quoting NAV20 (Thread starter):
lost a finger

doesn't qualify as removing one's self from the gene pool which is the principle requirement for even being nominated.

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 6):
Red wings?

Funny, but I was asking a silly question, not trying to slam the US with a post that's dumber then the subjects contained.


User currently offlineNAV20 From Australia, joined Nov 2003, 9909 posts, RR: 36
Reply 11, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 18 hours ago) and read 1561 times:

OK, TedTAce and others, apologies, I should have re-considered the thread starter and just said that I hoped that they gave people a good laugh, which was my intention. Sorry too if they're 'old hat' to some.

It was 'association of ideas' really - they were sent to me by the California branch of my family. It was the checkout incidents that amused me most, because I encountered exactly the same odd mixture of menace and polite formality the only time I was ever mugged in New York City.

There was no room for doubt what would have happened if I'd tried to resist. But the guy wore a friendly smile throughout, said "Please" and "Thank you", only took money, and even gave a half-bow as he handed me back my wallet. He didn't actually say "Have a nice day" as he let me go, but I'll bet it was on the tip of his tongue........

Anyway, apologies again - I should have given the post more thought.



"Once you have flown, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards.." - Leonardo da Vinci
User currently offlineWorldXplorer From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 381 posts, RR: 0
Reply 12, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 17 hours ago) and read 1553 times:

Quoting NAV20 (Reply 11):
Anyway, apologies again - I should have given the post more thought.

Please don't couple me with TedTAce (sorry Ted), I did laugh, I just thought some my find the snopes article interesting. Bogus or not, I love the Darwin Award emails that float around. I laugh everytime.

WorldXplorer


User currently offlineTedTAce From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 13, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 17 hours ago) and read 1546 times:

Quoting NAV20 (Reply 11):
Anyway, apologies again - I should have given the post more thought.

Thank you  Smile


User currently offlineTu204 From Russia, joined Mar 2006, 1257 posts, RR: 17
Reply 14, posted (8 years 7 months 5 days 16 hours ago) and read 1525 times:

Quoting NAV20 (Thread starter):
">4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.

I disagree that this is an honorable mention. This guy is VERY smart. He even made sure that his story would make sense!
Of all of these, this one gave me the best laugh...and 10 was second.



I do not dream about movie stars, they must dream about me for I am real and they are not. - Alexander Popov
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