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Problem With A Coworker To Tell Or Wait?  
User currently offlineKLM672 From United States of America, joined Oct 1999, 2484 posts, RR: 3
Posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 18 hours ago) and read 2311 times:

Here is my story. I work in a grocery store. After a school year of being away at college a girl we'll call ashley comes to work and with one shiftleader out on medical she gets a shiftleader position. Naturally, she was rusty to begin with and was unaware of many of the new rule changes since she's been gone. I feel she is to young to be a shiftleader (19) and a lot of the power has gone to her head. She tends to order people around and seems very untrusting. "You need to get (shopping)carts." Points to the shopbacks (things people no longer want when they get to the check out is put on the window seal and I bring them back) bring those back and after come back (as if I were to run away or something) and then do carts." My break as been an hour late a few times. Often she doesn't have a clue that there is a huge line and I'm the one that has to tell her to open up. It just makes for an unpleasant shift and I have been talking to a co-worker and we see eye to eye on ashley and her lack of shiftleading abilities. The nice thing about myself (not to gloat) but i have a very good repetation of being able to be my own boss, I'll make it easy for the shiftleader by keeping my eye on the carts and will mention carts are low and I should go out, the shiftleaders have other things to worry about. Whenever i do that with Ashley she gives me a look as if to say "I am shiftleading I tell you what to do".

I was told that I have a raise coming up, although it was unknown when or how much but one will be coming to me. I am also due for my annual meeting/evulation. Now, my question is when the question at my meeting comes up as "any problems or concerns?" Should I let it all out (I assume that the person I am meeting with is unable to take the raise away from me although i will be seeing the Associate relations manager who I believe does handle raises.) or should I just not say anything pretend everything is great and just suck it up? also any advice on how to handle this girl and how to make it a pleasant shift? Do you think its safe to ask random people if they are unhappy with this girl as well? Comments welcome!

12 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineKaiGywer From United States of America, joined Oct 2003, 12262 posts, RR: 35
Reply 1, posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 18 hours ago) and read 2310 times:
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Dealing with difficult people are a part of every job. People work in different ways, and while she might seem "rough", think about the fact that there are many things she know about the operation that you don't.

And 19 is not that young for a shiftleader. I was an assistant manager at BK at 21, SS at 18.



“Once you have tasted flight, you will forever walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, an
User currently offlineKLM672 From United States of America, joined Oct 1999, 2484 posts, RR: 3
Reply 2, posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 18 hours ago) and read 2301 times:

Quoting KaiGywer (Reply 1):
about the fact that there are many things she know about the operation that you don't.

I hate to be difficult, but not really. Honestly, there is not much to a small store like this. In terms of knowledge its pretty open on the rules and procedures for a S/L. In other words, even though i am not a cashier I have the knoweledge to be a shiftleader.

[Edited 2006-06-25 04:28:09]

User currently offlinePROSA From United States of America, joined Oct 2001, 5644 posts, RR: 4
Reply 3, posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 17 hours ago) and read 2277 times:

Telling the higher-ups that you have a problem with your immediate supervisor is very seldom a wise decision. The only exception would be in extreme cases, such as sexual harrassment. Even if you're completely in the right in the present situation, management is going to support "Ashley," after all they made her the shift leader. Not only that, but word of your dissatisfaction is likely going to get back to Ashley - asking the associate relations manager to keep your complaint in confidence will be pointless - and then you can be sure that she's going to make life even harder for you.
I know this sounds harsh, but that unfortunately is the way the business world works. All I can really suggest is to try to speak with Ashley and explain (in a nice manner) your concerns. She might not realize that she's coming across as being bossy.
One last word of advice - do not swap "Ashley stories" with your co-worker. For all you know he or she is reporting everything to Ashley. It happens.



"Let me think about it" = the coward's way of saying "no"
User currently offlineAirWillie6475 From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 2448 posts, RR: 1
Reply 4, posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 16 hours ago) and read 2261 times:

Doesn't sound anything out of the ordinary, I'd say just keep it to yourself or co-workers. Not as bad as the place I used to work at where, during closing time people would actually yell and curse at each other because of stolen customers. (I used to work at a commission based store) Ahh those were the days. Just try to do your job, you have to realise that when you work at unskilled jobs such as local grocery stores, there will always be idiots, you just have to deal with them and move on to better things. Although from my experience, I do have to say that females make terrible managers so I feel what you're going through. Females always make a big deal no matter how insignificant a request/order is. Males are much more laid back.

[Edited 2006-06-25 06:19:26]

User currently onlineAR385 From Mexico, joined Nov 2003, 6458 posts, RR: 32
Reply 5, posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 11 hours ago) and read 2238 times:
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Quoting PROSA (Reply 3):
All I can really suggest is to try to speak with Ashley and explain (in a nice manner) your concerns. She might not realize that she's coming across as being bossy.

Biiiig mistake. "Ashley" is certain to take it the wrong way if she is the type of person you are describing. She will turn on you with a vengeance for having "dared" to tell her she is not doing her job properly and make your life even more miserable until you have to leave to preserve your own sanity.

Quoting PROSA (Reply 3):
Telling the higher-ups that you have a problem with your immediate supervisor is very seldom a wise decision.

I don't aree with this. In my experience this is the most recommended course of action. Of course, you need to polish your speech so as not to sound as a crying baby, but rather in a way that demonstrates you and "Ashley" do not seem to see eye to eye in many issues. Remember, it's all about the customer, not about yourself. If it appears that your accusations come from resentment or personal issues, then yes, you will loose credibility and achieve nothing. But, if you are able to show that her management style is affecting sales (by whatever reason you can come up with) you'll be listened too. It would also help if you can find someone else who can back you up.

The problem with doing nothing, is that you'ill become a little bit more miserable and stressed with each day that passes. And we don't want to see you in the news when you go postal, do we?

Good luck.


User currently offlineIlikeyyc From United States of America, joined Dec 2003, 1373 posts, RR: 20
Reply 6, posted (8 years 5 months 3 days 7 hours ago) and read 2206 times:

Quoting KLM672 (Thread starter):
Whenever i do that with Ashley she gives me a look as if to say "I am shiftleading I tell you what to do".

From your entire post, it really sounds like this girl has a confidence problem in her decisions and in the people she works with. As a result, she becomes authoritarian and gets defensive to make up for her lack of confidence/trust. In her view, any time someone makes a suggestion or questions her decisions, she sees that as an attack on her abilities to be a shift leader and again gets defensive to stop any "attack". She knows at times that she is doing a poor job or doesn't know what she is doing and bossing people around/being mean is an attempt to cover that up.

Quoting KLM672 (Thread starter):
or should I just not say anything pretend everything is great and just suck it up?

Unless you can cite certain store/job performance examples (customer complaints are up/she discriminates against some employees) you better keep your mouth shut. If I were manager and someone came to me saying, "I don't like this person" my response would be "tough $h!t". But if they came to me saying "this person is doing a poor job because of X, Y, and Z" then I would listen and investigate further. When you speak poorly of someone else without good reason, it reflects poorly on you.

Quoting KLM672 (Thread starter):
also any advice on how to handle this girl and how to make it a pleasant shift?

Be a man and talk to her about your concerns. Be diplomatic and don't get emotional and whine. Just be prepared for her to get defensive and heavy handed because she lacks confidence.

Quoting KLM672 (Thread starter):
Do you think its safe to ask random people if they are unhappy with this girl as well?

You can ask them what they think of her, but don't tell them your opinion of her. You never know who might tell her.



Fighting Absurdity with Absurdity!
User currently offlineKLM672 From United States of America, joined Oct 1999, 2484 posts, RR: 3
Reply 7, posted (8 years 5 months 2 days 18 hours ago) and read 2169 times:

ok so i simpley asked "what do u think of ashley" to a few people (on AIM, in private) not stating my thoughts first and time after time people don't care for her, I am up to 3 people and one person said "I don't work with her often but Hannah complained about her at soccer today". Would rounding up these people be a good choice and go in as a unit to talk to the A.R.M.
Thanks again.


User currently offlineReidYYZ From Kyrgyzstan, joined Sep 2005, 536 posts, RR: 0
Reply 8, posted (8 years 5 months 2 days 17 hours ago) and read 2154 times:

This smacks of a manager type I know. They do not take criticism well, everyone thinks he is a dink and lacks people skills and communication skills. They won't listen to you, but make something their idea and they will run with it, take full credit at its' success, or blame you in its' failure. As one co-worker says "lead him (her in your case) to the pile of shit, and they will step in it". It is not good customer service, but once in a while, let the line up build up, let the store run out of carts and turn it on her as 'you never said' and 'I was already working on (insert task she assigned you)'. Do this for a while and she will build the case for you, as stated above:

Quoting Ilikeyyc (Reply 6):
Unless you can cite certain store/job performance examples (customer complaints are up/she discriminates against some employees)...

You have to record this stuff, then with a nice little package, talk to a Superior, if she is bad at her job, it has to come out. With the dink in question above, head office has finally seen the light, and we can tell he is walking on eggshells. He has stepped in the pile once too many times.

Besides, consider this as training for a horrible relationship.


User currently offlinePROSA From United States of America, joined Oct 2001, 5644 posts, RR: 4
Reply 9, posted (8 years 5 months 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 2118 times:

Quoting Ilikeyyc (Reply 6):
Unless you can cite certain store/job performance examples (customer complaints are up/she discriminates against some employees) you better keep your mouth shut. If I were manager and someone came to me saying, "I don't like this person" my response would be "tough $h!t". But if they came to me saying "this person is doing a poor job because of X, Y, and Z" then I would listen and investigate further. When you speak poorly of someone else without good reason, it reflects poorly on you.

It can get even worse. Let's say you're having trouble with Ashley, who is your immediate supervisor, and complain to Charlie, who's the general manager and Ashley's supervisor. Charlie might very well consider this to be a criticism of his own competence, after all he entrusts Ashley with managerial responsibilities. I'm not saying it should be this way, if Charlie is confident in his own skills he shouldn't interpret your complaint in this manner, but the risk does exist



"Let me think about it" = the coward's way of saying "no"
User currently offlineNancy From United States of America, joined May 2004, 467 posts, RR: 5
Reply 10, posted (8 years 5 months 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 2112 times:

The best thing to do is to go to her. State your concerns and ask what she wants you to do. It's very possible that she wasn't given all the information she needs and it may reflect badly on the people above her and that is a ball of snakes you don't want. Say something like "What do you want me to do whenthe line gets really long and I'm the only person on register?" I wouldn't worry about her giving you directions. When you're break is late I would wait 15 minutes and then say hey I need my break. Going to her first is most professional thing to do even when people are really annoying.

User currently offlineIlikeyyc From United States of America, joined Dec 2003, 1373 posts, RR: 20
Reply 11, posted (8 years 5 months 2 days 4 hours ago) and read 2097 times:

Quoting PROSA (Reply 9):

Exactly right. Plus (and this is NOT a stab at you, KLM672- since Ashley seems to be the problem) when people disagree, who is easier to replace? The shift leader who requires training and a lot of knowledge/experience, or the frontline grunt?

Quoting KLM672 (Reply 7):
Would rounding up these people be a good choice and go in as a unit to talk to the A.R.M.

Probably not. Again, it is best if all of you address the problems directly with Ashley. Taking your case to a superior should only be done if your previous attempts to smooth out problems with Ashley have failed. If you do talk to a superior, be prepared to only discuss job performance issues.



Fighting Absurdity with Absurdity!
User currently offlineKLM672 From United States of America, joined Oct 1999, 2484 posts, RR: 3
Reply 12, posted (8 years 5 months 2 days 4 hours ago) and read 2088 times:

If I talk to ashley will it be more of a "I need to be good to Andre so I'm doing this..." fake stuff then?

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