Matt D From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 9502 posts, RR: 47 Posted (12 years 10 months 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1188 times:
Ok...that first thread was getting a bit long. So I'll interject my $.02 by starting a new one.
First of all, much as I hate to say it, whoever made the comment about hypocrisy was pretty much right on the money. Also, a comment was made that it is more likely that the ones that obsess with it and lose all their money are really the ones being suckered and degraded. That, I also agree with.
So anyway, here's my take on it:
As was also stated, any two consentual adults that decide they want to pork each other in front of a camera should be their right. I personally wouldn't want to know or date anyone that did something like that (please see my old post about strip bars I posted awhile back). But, to each, their own. That is my choice. I respect yours, you should do likewise.
As most of you know, I believe in honesty, even if it sometimes gets me in trouble (as it often does on this site), I enjoy a little skin flick every now and then. I mean c'mon, what guy doesn't have 'needs' that need to be met? Well, I do too. And there isn't always a 'partner' around to satisfy those desires. I'm not in the least ashamed to admit that there are times-not all that often-but still at least once every week or so-that I'll pop in a flick (it took me quite awhile to find one that I liked), and lay in the bed or on the couch, and stroke and yank my way to happiness while living vicariously through the images on the TV screen. Since I don't have all that great of an imagination, lying in the dark and reliving a past experience or fantasizing about someone I saw on the street that day can make it hard to rise to the occasion and come to fruition. So a good blue movie, usually about 5 or 10 minutes of my favorite passages is all it takes to release that tension.
The problem is that so many guys get all defensive and in denial when asked if they 'take care of business' on their own. 99.99999% of them are lying. ALL guys do it at one time or another. And most do it on a regular basis. This holds true even if that guy is in a steady relationship with someone. They may not do it as often (as they have the real thing), but they still do occasionally. I know I have. I think that if you want to get to the bottom of the 'taboo' aspect of it, THIS is probably where you should look.
So, in THAT sense, I see no real problems with porn. As ridiculous as this may sound, they can also be used as instructional/educational tools for couples looking for new ways to spice up their relationships.
And if I ever have son(s), when they reach 13 years old, I'm going to buy him/them subscriptions to Playboy magazine. And when he turns 14 or 15, before he goes out on Friday or Saturday nights, I'm going to give him some latex goods.
I'm a male. And I know how males are...especially at that age. I don't want to do what so many parents do and live in denial on the subject. I'm going to take the issue head on and make sure that he has no hang ups about it. But at the same time, I'm going to make sure that he is also responsible for himself as well. If someone can balance their desires and outlets with responsibility and not let things get out of control, then porn can not only be entertaining but also healthy and even a teaching tool.
Like so many other things: porn in and of itself is not necessarily an 'evil' thing. It all just depends on how it's used.
But when smut gets too carried away, and when grotesque acts are what interest you, or you spend more than an hour a day indulging in it, and the time starts growing, THEN you have a problem.
But good, healthy videos of two people doing what YOU would be doing with someone, I really see no issues.
Heavymetal From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 1, posted (12 years 10 months 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1157 times:
In a nutshell, there's LOVE and there's LUST...and they are very different.
LUST is the world of perpetual horniness, which most of us guys inhabit. Different people cruise in this world in different ways. You can have tons of fun here as long as you stay responsible and keep a clear head (well, both of them). LUST has its' rules, many of which were pointed out on the other thread, but in my opinion exploring LUST is one of the joys of youth...and you're only young once.
LOVE is an entirely different, and more mysterious, state. But it's basically what happens when you get tired of waking up next to nothing (or someone who only has a LUST card to you.) LOVE is what happens when you realize that no matter how self-confident you think you are, there's probably someone out there who can make you a better person.
The greatest relationship in the world is one that has generous amounts of both LOVE and LUST, but they don't happen as often as we're sure they do and there lies the problem..... the crazy and twisted little catch that God designed into that formula is that we frequently go completely insane attempting to achieve that rare and wonderful relationship!
Porn is a a solid, unmistakable resident of the world of LUST. If it's your thing, great. If it's your ONLY thing, brother you need help.