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What Age Do You Think It Is To Late To Have A Kid?  
User currently offline747400sp From United States of America, joined Aug 2003, 3507 posts, RR: 2
Posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 7 hours ago) and read 3963 times:

I been hearing and seeing a lot people who had there first child in there 40's some in there 50's. I my self is pushing 30(  eek  ) and do not see myself having kids a time soon! But do you think you are taking a risk when you wait till you 40's or 50's to have child. Did any of you have a child late in life, if so please let me read your story.
Thank You  Smile

26 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineNewark777 From United States of America, joined Dec 2004, 9348 posts, RR: 30
Reply 1, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 6 hours ago) and read 3956 times:

Once you enter your 50's, it starts becoming really selfish to have kids. How would you like to graduate high school, and having your parents be nearly 70? It makes it really unfair for them.

Harry



Why grab a Heine when you can grab a Busch?
User currently offlineNotdownnlocked From United States of America, joined Sep 2000, 929 posts, RR: 1
Reply 2, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 6 hours ago) and read 3948 times:

18 or 19 is good so you can play sports with them and also be mentally coherent to change the diapers when the time arises but that is another story.

Truthfully though I am older and more professionally and financially secure so I am saving good money for my babys college who has just turned 6 months of age.

There is no correct time to have a baby hence there are no textbooks written that will tell you the best time depending upon your situation.


User currently offlineLowrider From United States of America, joined Jun 2004, 3220 posts, RR: 10
Reply 3, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 5 hours ago) and read 3938 times:

The risk to the mother and child goes up the older the woman gets. I think there is a dramatic increase somewhere past 36. My wife and I agreed that we would be done having kids when she turned 35 for that reason, so we maybe have time for one more. I agree that it is selfish to try and start a family past a certain point. There is more to raising kids then just getting them graduated from high school. I look forward to further events such as thier weddings, college, and so on.


Proud OOTSK member
User currently offlineArmitageShanks From UK - England, joined Dec 2003, 3611 posts, RR: 15
Reply 4, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 5 hours ago) and read 3930 times:

For women I would say no later than 35. Because of the lesser physical requirements I'd say 45 for men. Tthere are some concerns about the increased chances of a child having certain illnesses, like downs syndrome, in women older than 40.

I think its a bit selfish to have children so old because the age difference will be so much that it will be harder for parents to be as active as they would be if they were in their late 20's or 30's.


User currently offlineAirCop From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 5, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 5 hours ago) and read 3921 times:

Quoting ArmitageShanks (Reply 4):
For women I would say no later than 35. Because of the lesser physical requirements I'd say 45 for men

Personal experience I would use the age of 35 for both parents. How mature the parents are also plays a factor in other range also. My first child (boy) came along when I was 35 no problems. I currently have a child (female) type that came along when I was 42, so I will be 60 when she will be getting out of high school. With this child, one has to balance her needs and wants with planning for retirement etc, while the other has had experiences this one might not have, and don't let anyone tell you there no difference in bringing up a boy or girl. The male is much easier.


User currently offlineCastleIsland From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 6, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 5 hours ago) and read 3917 times:

As someone who will probably never have a child, I say: from the day you are born, I don't want to have your DNA spread through the cosmos. Have a beer and have some fun. I just don't understand the need to procreate; it never made any sense to me. It's rather silly. Adopt a starving child if you feel the need to have a young thing in your house.

User currently offlineLTU932 From Germany, joined Jan 2006, 13864 posts, RR: 50
Reply 7, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 4 hours ago) and read 3908 times:

Quoting Notdownnlocked (Reply 2):
18 or 19 is good so you can play sports with them and also be mentally coherent to change the diapers when the time arises but that is another story.

IMO 18 or 19 is still way too young. They're still kids and need to experience more things before they can think about settling down and start a family. Personally, I'll only think about having kids at earliest when I'm 26.


User currently offlineANCFlyer From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 8, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 4 hours ago) and read 3908 times:

I decided early on I didn't want any kids . . . my first wife was unable to have children (and eventually - after 5 years marriage at age 28 died from Cervical Cancer). I didn't want kids not because she couldn't have any, rather because once I reached at 30 (when I got remarried) I didn't want to start a family that I would "be rid of" until I was into my 50s. And because I don't like kids, anyone's kids, in virtually any quantity or setting, and it takes work for me to tolerate them.

I now have a 12 year old daughter  cool  bigthumbsup . My plans to remain childless didn't exactly work. No regrets though. She's an awesome young lady . . .

I would say a decent cut-off would be late 20s/very early 30s. Don't want to be saddled with a rug rat(s) well into your 50s/60s retirement time. Get it done, get it overwith.


User currently offlineUSAFHummer From United States of America, joined May 2000, 10685 posts, RR: 53
Reply 9, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 4 hours ago) and read 3902 times:

My folks had me when my mom was 38 and my dad was 39...while obviously I had no control over that, I think its kind of late...I'd like to have my kids when I'm around 30 or so...

Greg



Chief A.net college football stadium self-pic guru
User currently offlineL-188 From United States of America, joined Jul 1999, 29791 posts, RR: 58
Reply 10, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 4 hours ago) and read 3902 times:

I never really worried about it until about two weeks ago when a study came out that said that children of men over the age of 30 have a 40% higher chance of autisim.


It sort of bothered me since I am now approaching half a decade over that age, haven't even had a dating life in the past 10 years, and right now don't think I have much chance of one in the future.

Yeah, I got thinking about that and it bothered me.



OBAMA-WORST PRESIDENT EVER....Even SKOORB would be better.
User currently offlineGo3Team From United States of America, joined Mar 2004, 3267 posts, RR: 16
Reply 11, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 3 hours ago) and read 3865 times:

My mom had my sister when she was 48. She had me when she was 33. I was the first, my sister, the last. She had 2 in between. There is a 10 year gap between the youngest, and the next youngest. Was she an accident? Yes. My parents figured they were safe, but they thought wrong. My sister was tested prenatal, and was confirmed to be fine. My mom suffered with gestational diabetes, but other then that, she was fine. She was able to do normal things during the pregnancy.

My sister was raised differently from the rest of us. She was pretty much raised as a grandchild. She gets away with a lot of things that we didn't. She does great in school, does a lot of extracurricular activities, and wants to go to college. My dad turns 65 next year, and plans to continue to work, to make sure my mom has enough for when he is no longer able to support her. If there were a problem and my parents were no longer able to take care of her, she has 3 sibling could take care of her. She is almost 17, and pretty much able to take care of herself.

Would I or my family want to change what happened? Hell no. Are we a better family because of her birth? Yes.

As for myself, I am too selfish with my money to buy diapers or a college education. I don't plan on having any nuisances. If it should happen, I think I will name it Houdini.



Yay Pudding!
User currently offlineGreasespot From Canada, joined Apr 2004, 3078 posts, RR: 20
Reply 12, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 3 hours ago) and read 3852 times:

My dad had twins at 45....now they are off to university....best thing he ever did.

Becasue he retired at 51 and became the primary care giver he was not allowed to get old chasing after two teen agers......He is way younger than other 63 year old men...
GS



Sometimes all you can do is look them in the eye and ask " how much did your mom drink when she was pregnant with you?"
User currently offlineKiwiinOz From New Zealand, joined Oct 2005, 2165 posts, RR: 5
Reply 13, posted (7 years 9 months 4 weeks 3 hours ago) and read 3837 times:

My "rule of thumb". You want to be able to party all night and not wear diapers at their 21st Birthday party. I reckon 39 is about the limit.

User currently offlineTedTAce From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 14, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 6 days 16 hours ago) and read 3773 times:

The most important things to think about are the following:
A) How healthy are you now, and how healthy do you expect yourself and your mate to be when you decide to have kids, and
B) When are you going to feel like spending about 6 months of your liffe without sleep?

If I had known then what I do now I would have had kids MUCH younger. I had the health and energy to do everything they would have wanted then. Having kids @ 30 and 33 was not bad...but I don't reccomend it to any but the healthiest of people.


User currently offlineCarmenlu15 From Guatemala, joined Dec 2004, 4756 posts, RR: 31
Reply 15, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 6 days 10 hours ago) and read 3707 times:

I guess it's more of a personal matter... Having kids at a young age seems to be a family thing in my case, as Grandma was 21 when she had my dad, and Dad was 20 when he had me. I can't complain, as I will hopefully be able to count on my dad for years to come; same goes for Grandma, as longevity also seems to run in the family. Big grin

However, at 23 I don't think I'm ready to undertake the responsibility of parenthood. There's still a lot of projects on my plate, and none of them involve children.  Silly I'd rather wait till my late 20's / early 30's to start raising a family.

Though I think waiting too long to have children isn't a good idea either. There's the health issues (especially for me as a woman), and the issue of wanting to see your children grow and form their own families, and sharing with your grandchildren... sort of my experience with Grandma.

All in all, I'd say 35 would be the limit for me. But as I said before, it's more of a personal matter.

Regards,
Carmen



What do I know, I'm just an 'immature troublemaker with only a passing interest in aviation' (or so they say)
User currently offlineSabena332 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 16, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 6 days 10 hours ago) and read 3702 times:

Quoting LTU932 (Reply 7):
IMO 18 or 19 is still way too young. They're still kids and need to experience more things before they can think about settling down and start a family.

I agree! My mother was 18 and my father was 20 when I was born, must have been a hard time for them back then, my father had to serve his military service and my mother was an apprentice at a bank, so both didn't earn much money and both didn't have much time for me.

Fortunately it turned out good.  Wink

Patrick


User currently offlineAvianca From Venezuela, joined Jan 2005, 5922 posts, RR: 40
Reply 17, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 6 days 10 hours ago) and read 3698 times:

I think the best age is between 25 and 35,

but anyway I am already training making babys...  Big grin



Colombia es el Mundo Y el Mundo es Colombia
User currently offlineCarmenlu15 From Guatemala, joined Dec 2004, 4756 posts, RR: 31
Reply 18, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 6 days 5 hours ago) and read 3629 times:

Quoting Sabena332 (Reply 18):
Fortunately it turned out good.

It did?! Funny, one would think otherwise...  duck 



What do I know, I'm just an 'immature troublemaker with only a passing interest in aviation' (or so they say)
User currently offlineWSOY From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 19, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 4 days 12 hours ago) and read 3555 times:

I was 41, she 40, when our daughter was born. (I must add that everything in the project was normal otherwise, we were just late in starting, but normally fertile. We even had a miscarriage 9 monts before the real pregnancy on week 10.)
Nothing is preventing men and women at 40 to have a go at it with good results. Be advised to use all the benefits of modern technology, like ovulation tests to determine the optimun time for conception, as there will be not too many cycles to lose.

Quoting ArmitageShanks (Reply 4):
For women I would say no later than 35. Because of the lesser physical requirements I'd say 45 for men.

Which "lesser physical requirements"? You can't mean the labour at birth, can you? Or do you mean that you're not going to take part in the daily routines in a family with small kids, and burden your wife instead?
Note: I come from a country where daycare is a legal right for everyone under three.

Quoting ArmitageShanks (Reply 4):
I think its a bit selfish to have children so old because the age difference will be so much that it will be harder for parents to be as active as they would be if they were in their late 20's or 30's.

What ability you reckon is required but lost at 40-50? Reading bedtime stories, changing nappies, teaching the kid to drive the bicycle, or what.

Quoting Lowrider (Reply 3):
The risk to the mother and child goes up the older the woman gets. I think there is a dramatic increase somewhere past 36.

That is simply untrue. Obese and diabetic mothers have a somewhat higher risk, and the prevalence of obesity increases with age in this society. See:http://www.babycenter.com/expert/pregnancy/pregcomplications/3127.html


User currently offlineJoffie From Australia, joined Mar 2006, 806 posts, RR: 2
Reply 20, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 3504 times:

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20563124-2,00.html

Now, this is just wrong.

The lady will be 80 when the kid is 16.


User currently offlineHAWK21M From India, joined Jan 2001, 31667 posts, RR: 56
Reply 21, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 3 days 19 hours ago) and read 3480 times:

As long as one can Financially support that kid & give the kid a proper Education until the kid passes college.Its not late.
regds
MEL



Think of the brighter side!
User currently offlinePope From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 22, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 3 days 17 hours ago) and read 3470 times:

Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 21):
As long as one can Financially support that kid & give the kid a proper Education until the kid passes college.Its not late.

Don't you think the role of a parent is quite a bit more than just financial support? What about love, guidance and emotional support?

My father died when I was in my mid-20's of a rare form of cancer (he was 56). I felt really blessed that my father was able to see me graduate and get married and enjoy some success in my career. My younger brothers, particularly the youngest who was 18 at the time really suffered not because he wasn't financially supported (my father left the family well cared for) but because in his words, "I never got to show dad what I became."

Just a thought.


User currently offlineVikkyvik From United States of America, joined exactly 11 years ago today! , 9800 posts, RR: 26
Reply 23, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 3 days 14 hours ago) and read 3447 times:
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My dad was 40 when I was born.

He's 65 now, and he's probably more active than I am. He plays tennis a couple days a week, plays golf probably 3 days a week, bikes maybe once every two weeks, does yard work, etc. etc.

In all likelihood, having kids somewhat later in life has kept him far more active for a much longer time. So he actually managed to keep up with us (relatively) for as long as he had to.

However, I'm pretty sure that he's quite a bit more active than most people his age. I tend do doubt that I'll be the same way in 40 years, and therefore, I'd rather have kids when I'm somewhat younger (if I end up having kids).

But hey, I'm 24 right now, single, and have no intention of getting married anytime soon. So one thing at a time.



"Two and a Half Men" was filmed in front of a live ostrich.
User currently offlineFaustino927 From United States of America, joined Mar 2006, 263 posts, RR: 0
Reply 24, posted (7 years 9 months 3 weeks 3 days 11 hours ago) and read 3433 times:

747400sp Read my story in the non-aviation post "Becoming a father in your teens." It was very early for me, not late. Good luck!


Obsessed is just a word the lazy use to describe the dedicated.
25 HAWK21M : It is.But not all are that lucky & yet turn out sucessfull.Its up to the Individal too.But def Financial support is rated higher than emotional one.
26 WSOY : An allright stand for a man who loves aeroplanes so much, I should think. I desire to be loved by both parents (and everyone, in fact) is built into t
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