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When A Buddy Turns Into A Thief  
User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 3036 times:

I've been seeing this guy (very) occasionally for the last year or so. He lives as far north of the city as I do south, so it's not the easiest for us to hook up. I like him: I always thought him a decent lad (he's 20), probably a little shy but he can be funny and good company once you get to know him. He always struck me as a very well-adjusted lad, although not overly ambitious. He's training to be a social worker and wants to work with handicapped kids, which to me says a lot. He works part time in a supermarket while he's training, so he's not earning a lot of money, and, of course, he's still living at home.

Last week he texted, as he always does when he wants to hook up. It transpired he was going to Riga with his mates on Friday for a stag weekend and was strapped for cash. I needed someone to give me a hand with some work around the house, so I told him I'd give him €80 if he hopped on the train. It involved an hour and a half's work at the most.

So he came out last Wednesday. After he left, I had some shopping to do. I keep any cash in the house in a brown envelope on top of the wardrobe. You can guess what happened next: there was one €5 note inside. The previous day there was around €200. My first reaction was that I may have taken the money for something else or moved it and couldn't remember (which has happened before). I didn't phone him in case I was mistaken. Over the weekend I put my spare time to good use and had a complete clearout in the bedroom. The money is still missing. I had left him in the bedroom twice on his own for several minutes.

So, I'm on the horns of a dilemma. If I accuse him he'll deny it and I probably won't see him again. I know I'm not going to get the money back, and there's no way I'd report him to the police. I've never had any trouble with him before, and put it down to him being desperate for cash for his weekend away. I'm not going to say nothing about it either, as I want him to know that I know he did it. I'd be quite happy to do a deal with him and get him to do some more work for me, if he's willing, but he may be reluctant to come out in case it's some sort of trap.

A lot of you reading this probably think I'm crazy to even want to have anything more to do with him. I know where I stand with him now and, if he were to come out again the simple solution is to make sure there's no money lying around. I'm not angry with him, just disappointed, and I'm prepared to forgive him if he's prepared to make some sort of redress. I don't know if he will, but without that I could not see him again, which would be a shame.

Most of you are going to say "Dump him!", but he's too nice for that. He's still young and we've all made mistakes in our time. He's back from Riga today, so I'll probably leave it till tomorrow to make contact. It will be interesting to see how he reacts.

I don't even think I'm looking for advice here, just sounding-off and getting it off my chest. I've spoken to two of my mates about it. One said to drop him, another suggested saying nothing, having him out again, planting a trap and catching him in the act.

114 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineBaylorAirBear From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 2913 posts, RR: 50
Reply 1, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 3035 times:

All I can offer is that it may have been only money this time, but if you allow him access again, it may be more next time. Ultimately, it could cost you your life.

How's that for unwanted advice?

BAB silly 



I'm just skipping stones...
User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 2, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 3017 times:

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 1):
Ultimately, it could cost you your life.

How's that for unwanted advice?

He's not a violent type at all, though thanks for that nice thought BAB! It would be impossible to do that and get away with it anyway: he knows he'd be easily traced.


User currently offlineUTA_flyinghigh From Tunisia, joined Oct 2001, 6495 posts, RR: 50
Reply 3, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 3010 times:

I second this, Ireland is an island and a very small country - there's nowhere to hise from the Garda Siochanà if you're wanted  Silly

UTA  checkeredflag 



Fly to live, live to fly - Air France/KLM Flying Blue Platinum, BMI Diamond Club Gold, Emirates Skywards
User currently offlineTurkishWings From United States of America, joined May 2006, 1441 posts, RR: 8
Reply 4, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 16 hours ago) and read 3006 times:

I think you should dump him. But of course, if you REALLY like him, you might think twice.

A similar thing happened to me with my flat mate (just a mate). I found out he was stealing money from me. I called my BF over, we all sat down and talked. I had a knife under the pillow just in case hehe... I sent him away in five minutes and didn't even allow him to get into my apartment to pick his clothes. I put them all in big bags and gave it to a friend of his.

Much later, I found out that he was doing this to a lot of other people including his very own boyfriend.

My suggestion to you is to dump him before he steals more. Because he most certainly will....First he starts with stealing only when he needs money but once he gets the sweet taste of free (!!) money, he will steal more and not only from you....

Be very careful....



Coffee - Tea or Me?
User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20728 posts, RR: 62
Reply 5, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2997 times:

Quoting Braybuddy (Thread starter):
I keep any cash in the house in a brown envelope on top of the wardrobe.

It sounds as if it wasn't in plain sight, and in the few minutes he was alone in your bedroom, he found where you kept your stash of cash. It wasn't just a crime of opportunity, he went looking to rip you off. (Now I could also be wrong about this and he knew that's where you kept your cash.)

Either way doesn't sound good. He could have just asked to borrow some money, but he chose to take it instead. If he really had to go looking for it, that would make me uncomfortable having him around again.

An alternate course of action could be just securing everything of value in the house, have him 'round again, then getting what you consider €195 worth out of him in return, before you show him the door for good.  Wink



International Homo of Mystery
User currently onlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3771 posts, RR: 13
Reply 6, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2991 times:

Quoting Braybuddy (Thread starter):
So, I'm on the horns of a dilemma.

I agree, it's a tough situation. However, I do think you should confront him with it. Perhaps he turns out to be remorseful, and then I suppose you could have him work it off. If he's a reasonable guy, he'll do it, if not - get rid of him. Still, he might deny the whole thing, and then I think you should get rid of him all the same. Even if he is a nice guy, you need to be able to trust him. Otherwise, show him the door.

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 7, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2983 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 5):
It sounds as if it wasn't in plain sight, and in the few minutes he was alone in your bedroom, he found where you kept your stash of cash. It wasn't just a crime of opportunity, he went looking to rip you off. (Now I could also be wrong about this and he knew that's where you kept your cash.)

The envelope was sticking out over the top, which he must have noticed, and carefully put it back in the exact same postion. He probably thought it was money I'd stuffed away and forogtten about.

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 5):
Either way doesn't sound good. He could have just asked to borrow some money, but he chose to take it instead

I know, I know. I'm trying to justify the unjustifiable. In the way that he's not overly ambitious, I couldn't ever see him being a career criminal -- he's too laid-back for that! He saw an opportunity and went for it. Of course it's my fault too for leaving money lying round, thinking it was completely hidden.


Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 5):
An alternate course of action could be just securing everything of value in the house, have him 'round again, then getting what you consider €195 worth out of him in return, before you show him the door for good.

Yep! Thought of that too. Though I'd still hate to dump him for good. It will be interesting to see his reaction. I don't think he'll be able to handle it well.


User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20728 posts, RR: 62
Reply 8, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2976 times:

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 7):
I don't think he'll be able to handle it well.

If it was in plain sight, then honestly, give him the opportunity to fess up then. You never know, it could be the thing that turns him around from ever thinking about doing it again, to you or anyone else, if it was a one-off deal. If you really think he possibly does this to others, or could do it to you again, dump him. You have to be able to trust your tricks, err, friends. After all, rent boys are cheaper.  silly 



International Homo of Mystery
User currently onlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3771 posts, RR: 13
Reply 9, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2966 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 8):
After all, rent boys are cheaper.

Amen to that.

BTW, why would he leave a fiver? Reminds me of when my dorm-mates drink (STEAL!) my milk, and leave only a tiny amount in the carton, as if that would diminish the severeity of the crime somehow.  banghead 

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 10, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2957 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 8):
After all, rent boys are cheaper

I know! The going rate seems to be €180 an hour (I've checked). He got €280, including the money I paid him for the work he did. Nice for an hour and a half's work.

Quoting Doona (Reply 9):
BTW, why would he leave a fiver?

Think he may have missed it in his rush. I was only out of the room for a couple of minutes and he would have heard me coming back. The other notes were €50s, which are bigger.


User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20728 posts, RR: 62
Reply 11, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2934 times:

So you will update us to what happens, right? What you decide to do, and if he comes round does he fess up to it or not. (Anything else, you can just IM to us.)  Wink Who wants to be on the IM list?


International Homo of Mystery
User currently offlineAlessandro From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 12, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 2930 times:

Stay away, let the relationship dwindle to nothing.

User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 13, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 14 hours ago) and read 2915 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 11):
So you will update us to what happens, right?

I'm going to work shortly and will probably mull over what I'm going to say. He should be at home later, so I'll text him then. I reckon on playing it cool, asking him how the weekend went and what they got up to. I'll post an update tomorrow.


User currently offlineBirdwatching From Germany, joined Sep 2003, 3823 posts, RR: 51
Reply 14, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 14 hours ago) and read 2897 times:

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 10):
I know! The going rate seems to be €180 an hour (I've checked).

Damn, looks like I should consider a career change... I don't earn that much in two weeks!

Soren  santahat 



All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 15, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 14 hours ago) and read 2887 times:

Quoting Birdwatching (Reply 14):
Damn, looks like I should consider a career change... I don't earn that much in two weeks!

Can I have first call on that if you do, Soren?


User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20728 posts, RR: 62
Reply 16, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 14 hours ago) and read 2880 times:

Quoting Birdwatching (Reply 14):
I should consider a career change

Would you consider offering group rates? We might have friends, you know.



International Homo of Mystery
User currently offlineBilgeRat From United Kingdom, joined Dec 2006, 221 posts, RR: 1
Reply 17, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 14 hours ago) and read 2853 times:

Thieving is a totally dishonourable activity, and speaks volumes about the character of the thief.

It appears you were doing this guy a favour, now 80 Euros is about £50, which is a *very* generous sum for 90 minutes graft. Instead, this guy ripped you off. I'd say you should confront him, even if he denies it and you don't get your money back, at least you can say you had it out with him.

I joined a ship about 3 years ago now, and thieving from your shipmates is one of the worst (if not the worst) crime anyone can commit at sea. Everyone used to leave their cabin doors open and just a curtain drawn across the entrance. Several people had money go missing from their wallets which were left in their cabins. It was going on for some weeks, and we had a fairly good idea who the culprit was. One guy set a trap by leaving his laptop (with webcam) recording in his cabin one day, and got video evidence of the thief in action. A few days later the thief fell down some stairs and landed on his face. Not long after that he left the ship, and his reputation spread throughout the company. Some time later he left the company because nobody would have anything to do with him.

[Edited 2007-04-23 14:26:22]

User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 18, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 13 hours ago) and read 2835 times:

Quoting BilgeRat (Reply 17):
It appears you were doing this guy a favour, now 80 Euros is about £50, which is a *very* generous sum for 90 minutes graft

Yep. I like the guy and I knew he was stuck for cash, hence the offer. It was a chance to help the guy out, and I had no problem with that.

Quoting BilgeRat (Reply 17):
I'd say you should confront him, even if he denies it and you don't get your money back, at least you can say you had it out with him.

Oh I'm going to do that! Trouble is, I don't want him slamming down the phone (can you slam down a mobile?), so I have to play it cool and probably text, asking him how his weekend went, then telling him. I want him to know that I know he did it, and that I'm not happy about it.

Quoting BilgeRat (Reply 17):
A few days later the thief fell down some stairs and landed on his face.

Was that "accidental"?


User currently offlineLuv2fly From United States of America, joined May 2003, 12118 posts, RR: 49
Reply 19, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 12 hours ago) and read 2806 times:
Support Airliners.net - become a First Class Member!

OK here is what I would do.

Say nothing, invite the little bugger out for a meal, once at the restaurant, talk laugh eat, have a good time. Excuse yourself to use the loo, give the wait staff a note to give to the little bugger and leave ASAP! Have the note say something like BUSTED! Friends don't like friends to nick cash from them! Something creative like this and you can have the last laugh all the way home. Also have the wait staff give the little bugger a note in the same envelope he nicked the cash from.



You can cut the irony with a knife
User currently offlineLuv2fly From United States of America, joined May 2003, 12118 posts, RR: 49
Reply 20, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 12 hours ago) and read 2780 times:
Support Airliners.net - become a First Class Member!

Thus leaving him with the whole bill to pay! At least you will get a meal out of it and he will think twice before doing it again.


You can cut the irony with a knife
User currently offlineHAWK21M From India, joined Jan 2001, 31684 posts, RR: 56
Reply 21, posted (7 years 6 months 1 day 12 hours ago) and read 2776 times:

Place some more notes in the Bag & call him over again.Check if it disappears again.
Then you'll know.
regds
MEL



Think of the brighter side!
User currently offlineBraybuddy From Ireland, joined Aug 2004, 5758 posts, RR: 32
Reply 22, posted (7 years 6 months 18 hours ago) and read 2656 times:

Quoting Luv2fly (Reply 19):
Say nothing, invite the little bugger out for a meal, once at the restaurant, talk laugh eat, have a good time. Excuse yourself to use the loo, give the wait staff a note to give to the little bugger and leave ASAP! Have the note say something like BUSTED! Friends don't like friends to nick cash from them! Something creative like this and you can have the last laugh all the way home. Also have the wait staff give the little bugger a note in the same envelope he nicked the cash from.

You should be writing soap operas Luv2fly . . .

I could do something nasty on him if I wanted to (starting with calling the police), but the thing is, I don't want to. Despite what he did, I'm not angry with him, just disappointed. The easiest way to explain to everyone who's suggested getting back on him would be to imagine how you'd react if your favourite nephew/cousin did the same. You wouldn't deal with him the same way you would a total stranger. What he did was wrong, and he knows that, and he knows I could do some nasty things on him if I wanted to. I know the convenience store where he works, and it would be a major embarrassment for me to arrive with a couple of cops. Even if I didn't involve the police, I could call round to have a "chat", which would mortify him. He's bisexual, and his family, friends and workmates don't know this (least of all his girlfriend), and he knows I could embarrass him hugely here, if I wanted to. The thing is, I don't want to go down that road.

Quoting HAWK21M (Reply 21):
Place some more notes in the Bag & call him over again.Check if it disappears again.

One of my mates has already suggested that, but there's no need really. I know he did it.

So, I texted the lovely Kevin a few times last night and got no reply. I only realised yesterday when deleting sent messages that I'd accidentally sent him three blank messages last Friday, two days after he was here. Because of family/girlfriend reasons, he knows I never, ever text him until he text first, so by getting three uninvited blank texts he would have known something was up, and probably thought I was playing mind games. My texts last night were friendly, asking how he got on in Riga and what he got up to. They were all delivered, and there was no reply. If there was any doubt in my mind about him taking the money, the fact that he didn't reply confirms it. We had texted normally on Wednesday after he left, but before I discovered the money was missing.

So I'll play it low-key. I'll text again today and maybe even make him sweat a little. He's a lot more to lose out of all this than I do, although I'm NOT going to do anything nasty on him. Like I said earlier, he is a very likeable lad. What he did was wrong, but last week he was desperate for cash, by sheer fluke came across a golden opportunity and went for it. By applying a bit of psychological pressure I just might be able to prick his conscience a little. He's not very materialistic, and I think proof of that is the fact that he wants to work with handicapped kids. He could get a much better paid job than that, least of all modelling, which I've said to him in the past. At 6'1 and with his dark, smouldering looks he wasn't voted the Supervalu hottie last year by the female staff for nothing!


User currently offlineHAWK21M From India, joined Jan 2001, 31684 posts, RR: 56
Reply 23, posted (7 years 5 months 4 weeks 1 day 18 hours ago) and read 2560 times:

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 22):
One of my mates has already suggested that, but there's no need really. I know he did it.

If you are sure.Then there is no question about not dropping your friend.
regds
MEL



Think of the brighter side!
User currently offline767Lover From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 24, posted (7 years 5 months 4 weeks 1 day 18 hours ago) and read 2555 times:

Stop making excuses for the guy.

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 7):
Of course it's my fault too for leaving money lying round, thinking it was completely hidden.

It was hidden

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 22):
The easiest way to explain to everyone who's suggested getting back on him would be to imagine how you'd react if your favourite nephew/cousin did the same. You wouldn't deal with him the same way you would a total stranger.

A favourite relative is different from someone you hook up with occasionally. He essentially is a stranger.

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 22):
friends and workmates don't know this (least of all his girlfriend),

The fact that he has a g/f and is cheating on her says a lot about the sort of individual he is. He is not an honest person.

Quoting Braybuddy (Reply 22):
but last week he was desperate for cash,

Needing money to pay for an operation or a meal is desperate. Needing money for a lad's weekend is not.


25 Post contains images Kevi747 : Are you kidding? Why would you allow yourself to be treated like that? You have to get rid of him immediately. There's no way to build a relationship
26 767Lover : That would work if the dude was available "on demand." However, original poster indicated that the dude always has to make the initial contact due to
27 Kevi747 : Exactly! Which is why I continued: I really don't think there'e anyway to make it work. I've seen people try, but it never does. It's a flawed realat
28 Post contains images Braybuddy : Okay guys, flame away! Thing is, this is not a relationship or anything, just an occasional hook-up and a great bit of fun. There have been developmen
29 767Lover : Your judgement is being clouded by a nice @$$ and a good lay. This guy sounds suspicious. Again, he is a liar by the fact that he is obviously lying t
30 Baylorairbear : Braybuddy, from the texts you have posted, it is obvious to me (considering how uninvolved I, or any of us, are in this) that he is guilty. Those aren
31 Braybuddy : Is there anyone on the planet who's never told a lie in their lives? Would you want to know them? The thing is, I've come acoss a few dodgy character
32 Post contains images AeroWesty : The straight people are so not getting this. Ah well, back to bed.
33 Braybuddy : Just had a few more texts from him protesting his innocence and he wants to meet up next week to talk about it. I'll have a good idea then.
34 Bwest : Well, not even all gays are He might want to be closer to the moneywell? You can hook up with him, and have a serious talk with him. If he confesses
35 767Lover : OK. So I'm confused. Why did you start this thread? Seeing as I am one of the "straight people" who obviously doesn't "get it," I'll leave. Carry on!
36 BNE : He is not thinking straight, the sex has probably been good but its time for him to move on. His 20 and you are like 46-50; Time for you to look for
37 777236ER : If you're certain that it was him who nicked the money then he's specifically come to your house to steal from you and now he's lying about it. Don't
38 Flyingbabydoc : Well, count me in as one of those that does not get it. I mean, Norman, why would you want to be associated with someone who has shown so little resp
39 Braybuddy : Okay, like I said before, he's not the violent sort (quite the opposite), and, as UTA mentioned above, he knows he would be very easily traced, and h
40 777236ER : So then why all the histrionics? Tell the police and never see him again.
41 Post contains images AeroWesty : The straight people still don't get it. I'm heading out for smurfs. Laters.
42 Post contains images Braybuddy : He's too nice for that, and I'm a big softie at heart  [Edited 2007-04-25 15:19:28]
43 Post contains images HAWK21M : I guess thats right.Im confused. Since you know He took the cash.....End of Story. regds MEL
44 777236ER : What is there to get? If this is about a 50 year old enjoying having sex with a 20 year old then I don't see how that depends on what sexuality you a
45 AeroWesty : Glad someone finally asked. Guess what, it doesn't always break down to just the sex. Doesn't matter what ages they are, they can still be friends as
46 777236ER : I never said that. But Braybuddy is convinced he has no emotional connection to this guy, despite not immediately asking where he €200 was. I don't
47 AeroWesty : Let's write this one off to poor post geography. I was answering several posts all at once, and I was too tired to go through each and every post to
48 777236ER : When I was younger I slept around enough to get in nearly every single relationship situation you could be in. Yes, I appreciate that people have dif
49 Flyingbabydoc : I sincerely hope you were joking when you wrote that. It is a very sad thing to say. And, regardless of which one is culpable, that is the one thing
50 Post contains images AeroWesty : In scanning his posts, the only time he mentions anything regarding emotional feelings that I saw was here: I think he's been honest in his descripti
51 AeroWesty : Let's call this what it is. The kid is a fuck-buddy. You don't have to have a great deal of respect, admiration, or a relationship to pull that off.
52 Flyingbabydoc : True enough, I agree with you - but then if he is simply a f...-buddy who has costed you 200€, than I tend to agree with 777236ER - just tell him t
53 BCAL : I had exactly the same experience as you. Hooked up with this younger guy, met him and we clicked. We often went out socially and then became best fri
54 777236ER : And if that's true you have to be really careful that firstly you don't get emotionally attached to them and secondly that they aren't fucking you ar
55 AeroWesty : No--and I've stated my the reasons for that in previous posts.
56 AeroWesty : Again, that's merely an assumption of yours--Braybuddy has already posted that he does not have an emotional attachment to the guy.
57 777236ER : So why doesn't he dump him?! The guy is stealing from him!
58 AeroWesty : 1) There's also reason to suspect it's the lodger, and 2) the numerous other reasons laid out in other posts in this thread addressing that very ques
59 Post contains images Flyingbabydoc : Then maybe I agree with what you said earlier, I simply don't get it. In any case, I hope it turns out for the best for Braybuddy. Alex
60 Kevi747 : No, that's what it should be, but it's not. Did you even read my first post? I'm telling you exactly what's going on. But you are too far gone with t
61 AeroWesty : I get that the lodger may have done it. Apparently, no one else gets that yet, and have crucified this guy before everything's known.
62 ManuCH : OK, I've only been lurking in this thread so far, but I herewith out myself as another person who thinks the lodger may have done it. Everything else
63 Kevi747 : Yeah, and someone could have broken in off the street and taken the money. But that's not what happened. If the lodger was a thief it would have surf
64 AeroWesty : And the first time in 4 years he's been in the house alone with Braybuddy's door unlocked. You weren't there, I wasn't there, James had the opportuni
65 Kevi747 : Yeah right. I seriously doubt that in 4 years that was the first time he had an opportunity to steal something. 4 years. That's a long time to have s
66 AeroWesty : Perhaps you've forgotten my earlier posts where I said things like "rent boys are cheaper", etc. When the lodger aspect of it came up I said "okay, t
67 Kevi747 : Alright, sorry if I am coming off as cocky, but I really just wanted to help this guy. He posted on here about this situation and even though he said
68 Post contains images Braybuddy : Phew! I'm just in from work and no wonder my ears were burning!! There are a lot of posts there and I'll try to do my best to answer them as best I ca
69 Luv2fly : Yeah this thread has taken on a life's of its own. In the end you have to decide and do what you are comfortable with amd what you can live with. I a
70 AMSMAN : How'd you guys meet? I'm not gonig to give you any advice on whether to dump him or keep him cos it's your business, not mine! Keep us updated though!
71 HAWK21M : Sorry.But I feel you are confused.Either you Know or you suspect.If you suspect then you need to prove. If there was someone else in the house around
72 Post contains images Kevi747 : Sorry, Braybuddy, I honestly was only trying to help. There's not a whole lot more to say except that I wish you the best. I'm sure he's gorgeous and
73 Braybuddy : If I get TOTALLY pissed off with him it's an option. I was browsing an interesting site called alternativeireland.com (check it out, although most of
74 Flyingbabydoc : Been there, done that, got the T-Shirt (well, only not because of a guy)! Hey, we all have fallen into some traps when our guard is down because too
75 Braybuddy : Good for you Flyingbabydoc, and it certainly was the best decision since you're now happily married to your old flame you hooked up with after years.
76 HAWK21M : Hopefully When you meet.The Answers sought will give you the right Answer. Keep us updated. Cheers. regds MEL
77 Halls120 : Wow. So how many bad acts does it take for a good person to become a "bad" person?
78 Braybuddy : It depends on context. There was a time in this country when people were hanged for stealing food, even in times of famine. Did you ever rob an orcha
79 Halls120 : No, I grew up in suburban LA. I did take some spare change once from my parents dresser when I was in the first grade, and stole a .25 cents candy ba
80 Braybuddy : Possibly, possibly not. Like I said earlier, I believe people have a degree of goodness or badness something like the Kinsesy scale of homosexuality.
81 767Lover : The extent to which you believe all this b-s is directly proportional to how sexually attracted you are to this guy. If it were a handyman who stole
82 Braybuddy : Sure. But I know the guy for a year and up to know his behaviour has been beyond reproach. If my nephew did it I wouldn't report him to the police. W
83 Post contains images Halls120 : I stole a candy bar and some spare change when I was maybe 6 or 7 years old. So no, I don't think I'm going to appear on the FBI's most wanted list.
84 767Lover : For starters we weren't talking necessarily reporting to police...just taking action. Yes, I would do something if it were my nephew. It would help h
85 Post contains images Braybuddy : The way the US has changed with the Bush administration I wouldn't be surprised if sometime you do.  Can I polish your halo? As in report him to the
86 767Lover : Let's see. You've had a boarder for a few years and the money in the brown envelope --your normal "hiding" place-- has remained intact the whole time
87 Braybuddy : But I always lock my bedroom door if he's around and I tell him to lock his. Not because I think he's dodgy, just for both our sakes. If I mislaid so
88 Post contains images Halls120 : I'd rather you buy me a pint of Guinness next time I'm in Ireland.
89 YOWza : One type of dishonesty is usually accompanied by another - in my experience. It may have only been money this time but if he is willing to steal he is
90 767Lover : That's already been established. He has a girlfriend, who he is cheating on with Braybuddy.
91 Post contains images Eric : TV doesn't even make drama this good...
92 Post contains images Flyingbabydoc : Darn, you beat me to it!!! I was just writing that "The saga continues" I wonder who will play the parts of the involved (Braybuddy, Kevin, James) in
93 ManuCH : This could be more complex than only being dishonest. Maybe he's still in denial and wants to pretend being straight, his girlfriend being simply a c
94 Luv2fly : Also he is young, I mean with age comes some wisdom. And who of you can not say if you only knew then what you know now! And hindsight is 20/20
95 777236ER : I don't think so. If you found out a prostitute were stealing €200 from you, would you even think about using him again?
96 Post contains links and images Braybuddy : Presidents Kennedy and Cinton, et al, cheated. Francois Mitterand made a career out of it. Former British Prime Minister John Major   cheated. Our o
97 Luv2fly : But thats you, everyone is different, and just because they are different does not mean they are guilty or innocent! It sounds to me at least, is you
98 Post contains images ScarletHarlot : Maybe James and Kevin are having sex and they BOTH stole your money!!!!
99 Post contains images 767Lover : It's like a little mini psychological study, isn't it? I often wonder how the professionals sniff this sort of stuff out. It looks like you are never
100 Luv2fly : I had to post this, from the movie A league of their own! It has to do with thinking with the right head. Jimmy Dugan: Evelyn, could you come here for
101 Braybuddy : LOL! LOLOL!
102 Post contains images ManuCH : Maybe Braybuddy spent the money himself and doesn't remember (hint: that's why you didn't find the €200 when you did the bedroom clearout)
103 Braybuddy : While I've spent money in the past and forgotten about it, I can say for certain that the money was there on Tuesday evening. My mate Les came round
104 Post contains images HAWK21M : Get the Cops & Intorragate both regds MEL
105 Post contains images UTA_flyinghigh : I can see him now explaining the whole thing to the Gardai UTA
106 Flyingbabydoc : This keeps getting better and better. Forget Miami, Vegas, New York....Watch out, CBS: Here comes the new "CSI Dublin"! Alex
107 Post contains images HAWK21M : Don't forget the Chair & the Bright light & Water. regds MEL
108 TSS : If you've a light touch, lifting fingerprints off a smooth surface is easy. However, getting a good, clear set off a paper envelope that has been han
109 Post contains images 767Lover : Why do I have the feeling that BB is going to end up finding the money in a pants pocket in the dirty clothes bin?
110 Post contains images HAWK21M : You think He'll tell us about it regds MEL
111 Post contains images Braybuddy : I spoke to the cops this morning, and, fair dues to them, they wanted to send someone round right away. I had to knock that on the head, however, as,
112 Post contains images AeroWesty : Perhaps that's another one of his other fetishes, just yet unexplored.
113 Post contains images Braybuddy : What about getting him out in his footie gear and giving him a good spanking . . . now there's a thought! And worth every cent of the money stolen .
114 Post contains images HAWK21M : regds MEL
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