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Kid Doing Drugs? Make Him Wear A Sign To School  
User currently offlineS12PPL From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1933 times:

http://www.netscape.com/viewstory/20...s%2Fwears_drug_sign.php&frame=true

This father decided to make his son wear a sign to school to announce to all that he does drugs, after catching him in the act. Not a bad idea, actually....

41 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineSTLGph From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 9408 posts, RR: 26
Reply 1, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1929 times:

Yeah. Great idea. So next time the cops want to bust someone, they know where to go ... *AND* nail the parents to boot.


if assumptions could fly, airliners.net would be the world's busiest airport
User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20732 posts, RR: 62
Reply 2, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1894 times:

The father said: "I'm not doing this to humiliate my son, I'm doing it because I love him." How is it not humiliation? There are far better ways to show your love for your child than parading him around in front of the school with a sign saying he was bad. I'm glad the school principal put a stop to it.


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User currently offlineAirfoilsguy From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 3, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1894 times:

Great, one less person we will have to worry about in prison or dead. Would be nice to see more parents take an interest in disciplining the kids.

User currently offlineZakHH From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 4, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1851 times:

And so practical. Now the other kids know whom to ask when they don't know where to get drugs.

User currently offlineSTLGph From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 9408 posts, RR: 26
Reply 5, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1846 times:

Quoting ZakHH (Reply 4):

Prom King's been decided.



if assumptions could fly, airliners.net would be the world's busiest airport
User currently offlineIFEMaster From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 6, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1836 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 2):
How is it not humiliation?

It is humiliation, but given that it hopefully teaches the child to connect bad behaviour with an unpleasant consequences, I'm fine with that.

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 2):
There are far better ways to show your love for your child than parading him around in front of the school with a sign saying he was bad.

See above. I'm not a father, but if I was, I would hope that the love I have for my child would extend to wanting him/her to learn the connection between action and consequence. Be good, nice things happen. Be bad, unpleasant things happen.

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 2):
I'm glad the school principal put a stop to it.

There are far too many people in the world who are afraid of letting a child get their feelings hurt. Getting our feelings hurt is what moulds us, teaches us, strengthens us, and toughens us up.

Well done dad, I say.


User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20732 posts, RR: 62
Reply 7, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1828 times:

Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 6):
There are far too many people in the world who are afraid of letting a child get their feelings hurt. Getting our feelings hurt is what moulds us, teaches us, strengthens us, and toughens us up.

I think this goes further than just getting one's feelings hurt. This was a public mocking of a minor at the hands of a parent. What if the dad was tired of the kid wetting his bed? Should he be paraded around town with a sandwich board telling the world he wets the bed? There are better ways to handle this than taking advantage of your kid.



International Homo of Mystery
User currently offlineIFEMaster From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 8, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1827 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 7):
What if the dad was tired of the kid wetting his bed?

Apples and Oranges, Westy. The kid took drugs deliberately, knowing full well it was wrong. I've never heard of a kid deliberately wetting the bed and hoping to get away with it.


User currently offlineS12PPL From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 9, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1816 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 7):
What if the dad was tired of the kid wetting his bed? Should he be paraded around town with a sandwich board telling the world he wets the bed?



Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 8):
Apples and Oranges, Westy.

Exactly. This is a case of a kid using drugs, not a kid with a psychological or physical problem. I would disagree with a kid being led around town with a sign calling him a bed wetter.

The kid was dumb enough to let himself be caught. He deserved it in my mind.


User currently offlineUnknownUser From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 10, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 21 hours ago) and read 1783 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 7):
What if the dad was tired of the kid wetting his bed? Should he be paraded around town with a sandwich board telling the world he wets the bed? There are better ways to handle this than taking advantage of your kid.

Westy must have been a bed wetter. I think we can make a pretty logical guess how his parents tried to fix it...  scratchchin 


User currently offlineJamesbaldwyn From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 11, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 20 hours ago) and read 1751 times:

Looks as if it worked.

User currently offlineDC10extender From United States of America, joined Nov 2006, 617 posts, RR: 0
Reply 12, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 18 hours ago) and read 1702 times:

If they did that to everyone who did drugs at my school, they would run out of sidewalk.


Did you ever read on your birth certificate that life is fair? Thats cause its not there.
User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20732 posts, RR: 62
Reply 13, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 17 hours ago) and read 1684 times:

Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 8):
Apples and Oranges, Westy. The kid took drugs deliberately, knowing full well it was wrong. I've never heard of a kid deliberately wetting the bed and hoping to get away with it.

Deliberate or not, any good parent knows not to humiliate their kids in public.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/wales/schoolgat...mhome/content/2goodbehaviour.shtml

"Never humiliate your child in public - they'll only resent you. Remember, the way you discipline needs to build their self-esteem, not knock it back."

Quoting UnknownUser (Reply 10):
Westy must have been a bed wetter.

Oh stop being a child. It was a situation that popped into my head as a childhood problem that some parents need help with dealing with.



International Homo of Mystery
User currently offline767Lover From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 14, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 15 hours ago) and read 1653 times:

I don't think the punishment was out of hand. As for humiliation, this event was a blip in the kid's life. He will be humiliated in plenty of other ways as he develops.

My dad once made me telephone one of his friends and apologize for being rude. I was about 12 years old. I was scared to death to do it, and felt really embarrassed, but once I got it over with, it was no big deal and it didn't scar me. In fact, the only reason I even remember it now was that I was trying to think if my parents ever humiliated me on purpose.

I believe that kids are more resilient than we give them credit for.


User currently offlineFLY2HMO From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 15, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 1627 times:

Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 6):

Well done dad, I say.

 checkmark 

It's becoming rarer and rarer to see parents actually discipline their kids today... Just go to toys-r-us or wal mart or wherever and see all the parents with all the whiny little brats kicking and screaming for a stupid toy they want, and all the parents ever do is say "shhhh". Ya right like, thats gonna do much  Yeah sure

I got my fair share of woopins' and other forms a reprehension from my parents, when young, but I learned quickly, and was extremely well behaved and always acted more mature than my peers, I even still do at times.

But Was I scarred for life? No. Do I hate my parents? No. Do I have any traumatic memories? No.

Parents today need to grow a pair of testicles and a pair of boobs and quit thinking that spanking every now and then is synonymous with child abuse.

'Nuf said.


User currently offlineS12PPL From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 16, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 11 hours ago) and read 1617 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 13):
Oh stop being a child. It was a situation that popped into my head as a childhood problem that some parents need help with dealing with.

And you never act like a child....


User currently offlineADXMatt From United States of America, joined Jul 2006, 952 posts, RR: 2
Reply 17, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 1 day 11 hours ago) and read 1540 times:

I would rather walk around school with a sign then spend a few weeks at a juvinile detention center.

What would have happened if the Police caught him instead of his father? I think it would have been worse then this.

To the people on here who thought this was wrong what punishment would you have given? or would you have asked the kid for a light?


User currently offlineSeb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11718 posts, RR: 15
Reply 18, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 1 day 2 hours ago) and read 1501 times:

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 2):
The father said: "I'm not doing this to humiliate my son, I'm doing it because I love him."

There was a boy here in Portland years ago who was at the mall and had to go to the bathroom. He went in, peed on the seat and somehow, his mother found out. I don't remember if they went into the ladies room together or what that situation was. Anyway, she made him wear a sign around the mall saying he did and made him feel like a complete heel for peeing on the seat. He ended up a few years later robbing convenience stores and shooting several people. IMO, public humiliation does not work, it only makes things worse.

Here's an idea for all the parents out there: Try getting involved in your kid's lives BEFORE this kind of thing happens. Before they have the pipe in their hand. Before they have the gun in their hand Before the police get involved. Oh, wait.... then, you would have to take some responsibility for your kid's actions. Why are people so afraid to take responsibility?

GO CANUCKS!!



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20732 posts, RR: 62
Reply 19, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1494 times:

Quoting Seb146 (Reply 18):
Here's an idea for all the parents out there: Try getting involved in your kid's lives BEFORE this kind of thing happens. Before they have the pipe in their hand. Before they have the gun in their hand Before the police get involved.

Exactly. It's really just a simple thing. Having to resort to humiliating a child in public is nothing other than the sign of a failed parent.



International Homo of Mystery
User currently onlineEA CO AS From United States of America, joined Nov 2001, 13642 posts, RR: 62
Reply 20, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1492 times:
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Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 2):
The father said: "I'm not doing this to humiliate my son, I'm doing it because I love him." How is it not humiliation?

It's not humiliation solely for humiliation's sake - that's the difference. This is a textbook example of negative reinforcement at work.

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 13):
Deliberate or not, any good parent knows not to humiliate their kids in public.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/wales/schoolgat...mhome/content/2goodbehaviour.shtml

"Never humiliate your child in public - they'll only resent you. Remember, the way you discipline needs to build their self-esteem, not knock it back."

Different story entirely when you're talking about drug or alcohol abuse. It's not self-esteem (or lack thereof) driven behavior.



"In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem - government IS the problem." - Ronald Reagan
User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20732 posts, RR: 62
Reply 21, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1485 times:

Quoting EA CO AS (Reply 20):
It's not humiliation solely for humiliation's sake - that's the difference. This is a textbook example of negative reinforcement at work.

The thing about kids is that their minds aren't always developed enough to tell the difference all the time. Kids grow up with an innate belief that they can always look to their parents for love, support and protection. There comes a time in one's life when you recognize that not everything your parents did was always in your best interest. For some this comes as a shock, for others it's something they don't pay much attention to, and look at the good things their parents did for them instead. But the point remains, parents don't always do everything in their kid's best interest, even though their kids expect them to.

To publicly humiliate those who do look up to you for guidance, validation, and as a role model, is probably one of the cruelest things you can do to a developing mind, no matter what the motivation behind it may be. To express one's "love" in the form of humiliation is macabre.



International Homo of Mystery
User currently offlineTheCol From Canada, joined Jan 2007, 2039 posts, RR: 6
Reply 22, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 23 hours ago) and read 1453 times:

I agree with Westy. Most kids that do drugs, do it to rebel against authority. This kind of punishment will only make those kids resent their parents more, and they'll go right back at it. The point of punishment is to make an individual afraid and blatantly aware of the consequences. That obviously won't work if a kid is too pissed off to care, and there's nothing that makes a person more pissed off than getting humiliated by someone they trust.


No matter how random things may appear, there's always a plan.
User currently offlineDeltaAVL From United States of America, joined Mar 2007, 1893 posts, RR: 6
Reply 23, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 hours ago) and read 1370 times:

Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 6):
Well done dad, I say.

I'd like to see this done much more often, personally. While it's definitely humiliation, it gets the point across, not only to the son, but also to his classmates.

Of course, if I was a drug user, my stance would probably be entirely different. But I'm not.

I'd like to hear ANCFlyer's stance on the issue.



"We break, We bend, With hand in hand, When hope is gone, Just hang on." -Guster
User currently offlineAeroWesty From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 20732 posts, RR: 62
Reply 24, posted (7 years 4 months 1 week 2 hours ago) and read 1354 times:

Quoting DeltaAVL (Reply 23):
Of course, if I was a drug user, my stance would probably be entirely different. But I'm not.

It appears the thread-starter himself has a much different tune to play on the subject when he's the target, so anything's possible. My only problem with the example under scrutiny in this thread is that it's a parent doing it to a minor child. When you're an adult, well, you're out in the world and should expect anything.



International Homo of Mystery
25 ORFflyer : No - he was dumb enough to do it in the first place. I have to disagree with you here Westy. Not all parents of bad kids "failed" Sometimes it takes
26 AeroWesty : I keep hearing this "entitlement" issue as an excuse by parents to allow their kids to act out of line. I grew up with plenty of kids whose parents w
27 Yellowstone : Not to derail the debate over public humiliation as punishment, but I'm not sure the father's punishment would be that humiliating, depending on the c
28 TheCol : Kid's wouldn't think that way if they had to actually work for the stuff they want. Heck, I never got an allowance from my parents. If I wanted money
29 DeltaAVL : Right, but the "minor child" also happens to be the parent's child. And the parent has authoritative rule over most of the child's actions until he t
30 767Lover : I would not characterize the event described in the news article as a sado-masochistic act. For one thing, it's not like the parent was deriving plea
31 AeroWesty : We don't know the full extent of the kid's addiction, only that he was taking it for pleasure, selling it, and telling the world he was doing it on h
32 767Lover : I think you're grasping at straws wtih that one.
33 AeroWesty : You're welcome to your opinion, of course, but your response doesn't do anything to convince me the act doesn't fit the definition.
34 Post contains images Lehpron : No, there is a way to do it moderately, just this PC crap goes out of control at times while other folks think it is okay to terrorize kids, to build
35 Post contains images ScarletHarlot : Hey! Don't you be giving away my letter to messed up druggie boys!
36 Post contains images NWADC9 : It's all in the matter of intent. He's doing this to punish him for doing something so stupid to himself; not to get revenge or out of anger. "Son, I
37 AirTranTUS : Children do not resent their parents forever. I was grounded for quite a long time after breaking our garage door (I guess they are not for hanging on
38 TheCol : Or he is lying and will try harder not to get caught next time.
39 Post contains images ORFflyer : In a LOT of cases, this is absolutely true. And we could add a lot of teachers to the mix, but that's a different thread. TEACHING the difference bet
40 ANCFlyer : It should read: "I'm Stupid". Nuf said.
41 Post contains images DeltaAVL : Excellent.
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