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Jokes That'll Offend Everyone :)  
User currently offlineKaiGywer From United States of America, joined Oct 2003, 12251 posts, RR: 35
Posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 5 hours ago) and read 15319 times:
AIRLINERS.NET CREW
FORUM MODERATOR

Found these on another forum, they're pretty funny although some thinskinned individuals might find them offensive. Remember, don't be hatin'  Silly

-What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
-Juan on Juan

-What is a Yankee?
-The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

-What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ?
-The position of the dirt bag

-Why is divorce so expensive?
-Because it's worth it.

-What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
-Doughnuts

-Why is air a lot like sex?
-Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

-What do attorneys use for birth control?
-Their personalities.

-What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
-10 years and 45 lbs

-What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
-45 minutes

-What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
-Through his chest with a sharp knife.

-Why do men want to marry virgins?
-They can't stand criticism.

-Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
-Because those men already have boyfriends.

-What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
-After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

-Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
-The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

-Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
-Because they have cotton balls.

-What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
-A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

-What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
-"Are you sure it's mine?"

-Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
-Mace will do that to you.

-Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia ?
-Everyone has the same DNA.

-Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
-Breasts don't have eyes.

-Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
-Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

-Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
-A different bar.

-Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a blonde baby?
-They named him "Sum Ting Wong"

-What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
-A speech impediment

-What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
-A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... "a recipe".

-How do you get a sweet 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
-Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

-What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
-A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time ..." -A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this s**t....

-Why is there no Disneyland in Japan ?
-No one's tall enough to go on the good rides


911, where is your emergency?
313 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineAirfoilsguy From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 1, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 5 hours ago) and read 15314 times:

Why did Frosty The Snow Man pull down his pants?
He saw the snow blower coming.


User currently offlineDtwclipper From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 2, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 5 hours ago) and read 15310 times:

What's the difference between a Rolls Royce and a Northwest Flight Attendent?


Not everyone has been inside a Rolls Royce!


User currently offlinePilotdude09 From Australia, joined May 2005, 1777 posts, RR: 4
Reply 3, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 4 hours ago) and read 15251 times:

Quoting Dtwclipper (Reply 2):
What's the difference between a Rolls Royce and a Northwest Flight Attendent?

 rotfl 

Same for some QF ones!!

Great jokes guys keep em coming



Qantas, Still calling Australia Home.........
User currently offlineGAIsweetGAI From Norway, joined Jul 2006, 933 posts, RR: 7
Reply 4, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 4 hours ago) and read 15204 times:

From a French point of view:


What separates man from animal?
the Mediterranean Sea.

What's the capital of Algeria?
Marseille.

 duck 



"There is an art, or rather a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
User currently offlineEatmybologna From France, joined Apr 2005, 412 posts, RR: 0
Reply 5, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 4 hours ago) and read 15204 times:

I know it's clean but anyway,


Why was the number ten scared of the number seven?

Seven, eight, nine.



Isn't knowledge more than just the acquisition of information? Shouldn't the acquired information be correct?
User currently offlineEatmybologna From France, joined Apr 2005, 412 posts, RR: 0
Reply 6, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 4 hours ago) and read 15203 times:

How does a Polack take a shower?

Piss in the wind.



Isn't knowledge more than just the acquisition of information? Shouldn't the acquired information be correct?
User currently offlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3771 posts, RR: 13
Reply 7, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 3 hours ago) and read 15203 times:

Quoting KaiGywer (Thread starter):

-Why is there no Disneyland in Japan ?
-No one's tall enough to go on the good rides

Sorry to piss on your parade, but there actually is a Disneyland in Japan. The other ones were good, though.  wink 

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3771 posts, RR: 13
Reply 8, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 3 hours ago) and read 15182 times:

Just thought of a couple of good ones. Can't remember where I heard it, but here it goes.

A priest taking confessionals needs to take a bathroom break, and asks the janitor, Bob, to sit in for a minute. Bob does as the priest asks, and sits down in the confessional booth. Soon, a man comes in. He tells Bob that he has cheated on his wife, and got a blow job from a co-worker on the previous day. He then asks what his penance should be. Bob doesn't know, and sticks his head out of the booth to look for someone to ask. Next to the booth an altar boy is sitting and reading the bible. Bob motions to the boy, to come over.
"Hey, kid, what do you get for a blow job?
The boy replies: "Ice cream and a movie."

I believe I heard this one on this very forum: How come Scotsmen wear kilts?
Because the sheep wake up at the sound of a zipper.

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineJRadier From Netherlands, joined Sep 2004, 4697 posts, RR: 50
Reply 9, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 3 hours ago) and read 15163 times:

How do you recognize a jew driving?
- they drive 40-45



For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skywards, for there you have been and ther
User currently offlineFlyDeltaJets87 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 10, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 3 hours ago) and read 15151 times:

What do you call 5,000 lawyers at the bottom of the sea?
A good start

What do you call a sedan that goes over a cliff and kills 4 lawyers?
A tragedy. It seats five.

What do you call 5 skydiving lawyers?
Skeet.

What do Marines feel when they shoot someone?
Recoil

Why were there only 4,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?
They only brought four truckloads.

Why do birds fly upside-down in Alabama?
Nothing worth crapping on

Did you hear about the fire at the governor's mansion in Alabama?
They managed to save the wheels

Did you hear about the dilemna involving the governor's mansion in Alabama when the hurricane came?
They couldn't decide whether to tie it down or move it north

What's the best thing to come out of Alabama?
I-10 and I-20

What do a divorce in Alabama and a torando in Kansas have in common?
Someone's about to lose a trailer

What do you call 32 West Virginians on a roof?
A full set of teeth

Did you hear they raised the drinking age in West Virginia to 25?
Seems they want to keep alcohol out of the schools.

Why is there no longer a firework show at Euro-Disney in Paris?
French Army kept surrendering during the show.

Where's the best place to hide a Frenchman's money?
Under his soap

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car?
Because she was a woman

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her when she was bad?
Rearrange the furniture

When she was really bad?
Stick a plunger in the toilet

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her when she swore?
Broker her fingers

How do you end a game of Iraqi Bingo?
Call out a "B-52"

How do you play Iraqi chess?
B-52's, F-16's, and A-10's



More to come later.  biggrin 


User currently offlineCaptOveur From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 11, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 2 hours ago) and read 15114 times:

Quoting FlyDeltaJets87 (Reply 10):
Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car?
Because she was a woman

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her when she was bad?
Rearrange the furniture

When she was really bad?
Stick a plunger in the toilet

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her when she swore?
Broker her fingers

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was UUHHHGGGHAHHAHGHH


User currently offlineStlgph From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 9373 posts, RR: 26
Reply 12, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 1 hour ago) and read 15074 times:

What's the difference between me and a Rolls Royce?

Not everyone has been in a Rolls Royce.

*****

How do you know when I'm excited?

I uncross my legs

****

What do you get when you cross me with an octopus?

I've no idea either, but it sure grabs ass a lot

***

What's the first thing I do after I have an orgasm?

Tell your mom I gotta hang up

**

What will I get on my wedding night that's long and hard?

A new last name.



if assumptions could fly, airliners.net would be the world's busiest airport
User currently offlineMCOflyer From United States of America, joined Jun 2006, 8675 posts, RR: 15
Reply 13, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 1 hour ago) and read 15046 times:

Quoting KaiGywer (Thread starter):

-Why is divorce so expensive?
-Because it's worth it.

Don't let Katie see that.

Whats the difference between a man a woman?
Ones a dick and the other isnt.

Why did the cop not issue tickets?
He was high on coffee and doughnuts.

Whats the difference between a Freightliner and a Kenworth?
One shakes freight and the other eats cheese burgers.

Hunter



Never be afraid to stand up for who you are.
User currently offlineSeb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11659 posts, RR: 15
Reply 14, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week 1 hour ago) and read 15030 times:

Quoting KaiGywer (Thread starter):
-What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
-Juan on Juan

A woman had twins but she decided to give up both for adoption. One boy went to Egypt and the other to Spain. One day, years later, she got a letter from her son in Spain. He said his name is Juan and he had done extensive research and found her and his brother Amahl. Letters flew between the two and she went to Spain to visit her son. When she returned home, her friends asked her if she was going to Egypt to visit her other son. She said no because:

If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amahl!



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineIFEMaster From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 15, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 15004 times:

What do you throw a drowning bass guitar player?
~ His amp.


User currently offlineKFLLCFII From United States of America, joined Sep 2004, 3303 posts, RR: 30
Reply 16, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 15001 times:

Quoting MCOflyer (Reply 13):

Whats the difference between a man a woman?
Ones a dick and the other isnt.

Why did the cop not issue tickets?
He was high on coffee and doughnuts.

Whats the difference between a Freightliner and a Kenworth?
One shakes freight and the other eats cheese burgers.

Hunter

I want my 10 seconds back...

 Yeah sure



"About the only way to look at it, just a pity you are not POTUS KFLLCFII, seems as if we would all be better off."
User currently offlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3771 posts, RR: 13
Reply 17, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 14978 times:

Quoting Stlgph (Reply 12):
Tell your mom I gotta hang up

Shouldn't that be "dad"?

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineYYZflyer From Canada, joined Feb 2006, 3643 posts, RR: 4
Reply 18, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 14974 times:

Quoting KaiGywer (Thread starter):
-Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a blonde baby?
-They named him "Sum Ting Wong"

 rotf 

What do you say to your wife that has 2 black eyes?


nothing, you've already told her twice.

A better joke:






Womens' rights


 duck 



Avoid hangovers, stay drunk.
User currently offlineFlyDeltaJets87 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 19, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 14974 times:

What's the difference between a lumberjack and an A320?
About 10,000 trees a minute.


BOEING: The sound a plane makes when it hits the ground
^My friend wrote that one in my year book senior year

What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?
You can neogotiate with a terrorist

What's the difference between an intelligent Democrat and Big Foot?
There are people who claim to have seen Big Foot

Why are the streets to Paris lined with trees?
So the Germans can march in the shade

Why did the blonde helicopter pilot crash?
She got cold and turned off the big fan

How do you stop a Taliban tank?
Shoot the guy pushing it

What's the real purpose of the crash position on an airliner?
To kiss your ass good-bye

Quoting CaptOveur (Reply 11):
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was UUHHHGGGHAHHAHGHH

I knew I forgot one.  biggrin 

Here's another:
How did Helen Keller's parents confuse her?
Glued doorknobs to the wall

Quoting MCOflyer (Reply 13):
Don't let Katie see that.

Whats the difference between a man a woman?
Ones a dick and the other isnt.

Why did the cop not issue tickets?
He was high on coffee and doughnuts.

Whats the difference between a Freightliner and a Kenworth?
One shakes freight and the other eats cheese burgers.

Not gonna lie.....the only somewhat funny part in that post was "Don't let Katie see that". The last one might be funnier if I knew the trucking industry like you do.

Quoting IFEMaster (Reply 15):
What do you throw a drowning bass guitar player?
~ His amp.

Reminds me of the one:
You see a lawyer and an IRS worker both drowning in a pool and you only have time to save one. Do you A) Go get a sandwich or B) Read a newspaper?


User currently offlineCarmenlu15 From Guatemala, joined Dec 2004, 4761 posts, RR: 30
Reply 20, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 14973 times:

Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

A couple was relating their vacation experiences to a friend. "It sounds as if you had a great time in Texas," the friend observed. "But didn't you tell me you were planning to visit Colorado?"
"Well," the husband said, "we changed our plans because, uh..."
His wife cut in, "Oh, tell the truth, Fred!" He fell silent and she continued, "You know, it's just ridiculous. Fred simply *will not* ask for directions."

Quoting KaiGywer (Thread starter):
-Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
-Because those men already have boyfriends.

 checkmark  Spot on!

Quoting KaiGywer (Thread starter):
-What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
-A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

That's funny beyond belief...  laughing 



Don't expect to see me around that much (if at all) -- the contact link should still work, though.
User currently offlineHPLASOps From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 21, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 14934 times:

Well if we're going for the offensive lot, I can definitely contribute. A few of my favs:

What is the difference between a truckload of bowling balls and a truckload of dead babies?
-You can't unload the truck of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

What's funnier than a dead baby?
- A dead baby in a clown suit.

What's more fun that spinning a baby on a clothesline?
- Stopping it with a shovel.

What do you call a six point nine?
- A 69 interrupted by a period.


User currently offlineSpeedbirdie From United Kingdom, joined May 2006, 917 posts, RR: 52
Reply 22, posted (7 years 1 month 1 week ago) and read 14922 times:

What do you call a black man who flies planes????



A pilot you racist bastards! (told by a black pilot before you all kill me)  Big grin



Never give up..
User currently offlineDoona From Sweden, joined Feb 2005, 3771 posts, RR: 13
Reply 23, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 23 hours ago) and read 14898 times:

Quoting FlyDeltaJets87 (Reply 19):
How do you stop a Taliban tank?
Shoot the guy pushing it

I've heard that one in Sweden, but with a Norwegian tank instead of a Taliban one.  duck 

Cheers
Mats



Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
User currently offlineAloges From Germany, joined Jan 2006, 8707 posts, RR: 42
Reply 24, posted (7 years 1 month 6 days 23 hours ago) and read 14888 times:

"We don't really have bagels in Germany..."
"Well, whose fault is that?!"



Walk together, talk together all ye peoples of the earth. Then, and only then, shall ye have peace.
25 Post contains images YYZflyer : What do black people have white palms? Because there's a little bit of good in everyone. What's the difference between jumping on a trampoline and jum
26 Texan : What's the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Beer nuts are a dollar ninety-nine. Deer nuts are under a buck. In 1998, Sadaam Hussein and Lit
27 Post contains links and images Futurecaptain : LOL
28 Corocks : What's the difference between a moped and a fat chick? -They are both fun to ride until a friend sees you. What is the difference between a blond and
29 Lijnden : My share of offending jokes from my lists that I have collected. It is brown and in a diaper of a baby? - The hand of Michael Jackson. What does Wal-M
30 MCOflyer : Freightliners (aka Freight shakers) and Kenworths (aka K Whoppers). Hunter
31 Post contains images Duff44 : What's the chemical name for Viagra? Mycoxafailin A Russian, Jamaican, American, and Mexican are stuck on the top of a tall cliff. The Russian pulls o
32 Post contains images Halls120 : March 6, 1836 On that fateful day, Davy Crockett woke up and walked from his bunk on the floor of the Alamo up to the observation post on the west wal
33 EISHN : Two men are sitting next to each other on a plane. They both have black eyes. One says to the other "How did you get yours?". The other replies " A Fr
34 WildcatYXU : How do you convert a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give the bitch a shovel!
35 KBFIspotter : Sounds like something my Fiancee would say... Kris
36 AA787823 : What do women and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common? After the breast and thigh all thats left is a greasy box to throw your bone in!
37 Post contains images Nosedive : Hmmm MCO, you remind me of a joke: Q: What do you call a big shot virgin with a small peepee? A: Did you hear about the new VW they built in Germany
38 Post contains images Femme : What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Throw the washing in.........
39 FlyDeltaJets87 : The version I've heard: An Arabian Ambassador to the U.N. has just finished giving a speech, and walks out into the lobby where he meets his American
40 CaptOveur : Why do low riders have the little chain steering wheels? So it is possible to drive while handcuffed.
41 FlyDeltaJets87 : "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordian."- Norman Schwartzkopf Why don't women need a driver's license? Because
42 DC10extender : What two things in the air get a girl pregnant? Her legs. What did one of Paris Hiltons knees say to the other? I don't know, they've never met. Whats
43 Post contains images AustinAirport : Is it really thats HILARIOUS
44 CaptainJon : Can't say I have heard that one... Though I certainly don't drive that slowly!!! Just the ortho's in those 1992 Mercury's on the NY State Thruway.
45 AirPacific747 : How do you make an Olympics in Africa? You drive a hot dog stand through the desert....
46 Post contains images Femme : How do you know when a Chav has an orgasm ? She drops her chips (Fries)....
47 FlyDeltaJets87 : What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being in them.
48 Post contains images DeltaAVL : No, because there's nothing to make fun of about men. LOL!!!! That's terrible! I think I actually heard this one on A.net a long long time ago: "Why
49 MCOflyer : Whats the difference between a truck driver and a airline captain? One fly's by the seat of their pants while the other driv I'm no virgin. what do yo
50 Bwest : Apologizes... What do you call a Jew who carries around a gas bottle A DIY'er apologizes again
51 Post contains images Doona : Ooh, somebody sounds a little bitter Cheers Mats
52 Post contains images Duff44 : No, of course not... this is a joke thread
53 Post contains images Transpac787 : Don't shoot the messenger, but... What's the difference between a black man and a snow tire?? A snow tire doesn't sing when you put chains on it. God
54 Post contains images Aloges : Uuuuhh... ouch!
55 Halls120 : And what's worse, he isn't the least bit funny.
56 AirTranTUS : How did she know the phone was ringing, and how would she answer it and know what was said?
57 Post contains images Walter747 : Wooow Soo Bad!! Whats the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family. Another: Why don't black people like square danci
58 Post contains images Transpac787 : PFM of course.....
59 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : It was on vibrate.
60 Kovi17 : How do you starve a black man? Hide his food stamps under his work boots! What are the similarities between a black man and a vending machine? They bo
61 Transpac787 : What did the Alabama sheriff call the black man who had been shot 18 times?? The worst suicide he's ever seen.
62 Post contains images Duff44 : That's a drop in a bucket at this point...
63 Ren41 : Why did Helen Keller only use one hand to masturbate? --Because she moaned with the other.
64 Post contains images YYZflyer : Why do you take your watch off before putting your hand in a jar of jelly beans? Because the black ones will steal it. Why can black people run so fas
65 BHMBAGLOCK : C) Grab some popcorn! Not until they build the house first!
66 Post contains images Walter747 : Whats the similar between a black man and a apple? They both dangle from trees.
67 STLGph : Knock knock. Who's there? 9-11. 9-11 who? You said you've never forget.
68 Lijnden : Some more: How do you make a cat go 'woof'? - Soak it in petrol and set it on fire. A guy goes to his eye doctor for an examination. They start talkin
69 Duff44 : "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Very good Mr President, just like we practiced" What is Lorena Bobbitt's Czech name? Ivana Cutchu
70 FlashFlyGuy : Two condoms were walking down the street one night and came across a gay bar. One turned to the other and said, "Hey let's go in and get shitfaced". W
71 JRadier : How do you make a dog meow? - Freeze it and push it across a circular saw... MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW
72 Aloges : A technique doubtlessly perfected in Chinese kitchens! That gave me an idea. What's the difference between a Chinese and a North Korean meal? One doe
73 Lijnden : More... Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks." The other blonde looks and says "Those
74 Dougloid : Told to me by a Canadian. Thanks, Reg, wherever you are. A Newfoundlander decides he's got to make something of himself so he decides he's going to go
75 Post contains images JpetekYXMD80 : Was that supposed to be a joke or a comeback? Either way, didn't work... Does that mean you have a small peepee? What? okay.. what? Thats very offens
76 Doona : Was just reminded of this one. Not really hilarious, but it's offensive as hell, and intended as a joke, so I thought I'd mention it: Q: What did the
77 BristolFlyer : I haven't read all the posts but seeing as the thread hasn't been locked I guess this one hasn't been said yet... Four gays are sitting in a hot tub a
79 ZKSUJ : heres a couple for you fellas... 1) what do you call a family of Somalians?? - Barcode 2) Why do Jews have big noses? -Because the air is free 3) What
80 Jafa39 : Two gays walking along the street and another guy walks past. "He's gay" said on of the gay guys "How do you know?" said the other "I screwed him last
81 CaptOveur : I bet you are a fun guy to have around at parties.
82 Bwest : This blond girl gets a porsche from her lover and takes it for a ride in the mountains... all of a sudden the engine stalls. The girl gets out of the
83 WildcatYXU : How does a Somalian family travel on vacation? By fax. How do they break a protest in Somalia? With a fan.
84 Lewis : I know a couple of nasty jokes Why are there trees along the roads in Bronx? -Public transport. Why did a woman cross the road? -What was she doing ou
85 Seb146 : I guess my jokes are not as offensive: What do you call two gay Irishmen? Patrick Fitzgerald and Gerald Fitzpatrick Two strings walk past a bar. A sig
86 Helvknight : One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife's arm. The wife turns over and says "I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecol
87 Post contains images JGPH1A : Haha - we have a winner !
88 Helvknight : One night, George W. Bush is tossing restlessly in his White House bed. He awakens to see George Washington standing by him Bush asks him, "George, wh
89 Post contains images TZ757300 : Now thats just wrong Yes Hunter, don't quit what ever day job you have.
90 Dougloid : Told me by a guy from Detroit-Bobby, I'm thinkin of ya. What's the world's shortest book? "Negroes I Have Met While Yachting"
91 CanadianNorth : Whats the difference between CRJs and 737s? 737s are airplanes. "Are you going to share your sausage today?" "I never knew french people had those..."
92 AirTranTUS : Or camping.
93 N1120A : A story joke: A guy walks into an old time tavern where they still rent rooms above the bar and looks for the prettiest girl in the place. Sitting at
94 NWA742 : Why are black people getting stronger? TVs are getting bigger. -NWA742
95 A380US : JUST TO WARN THIS IS NOT EXPRESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT ANY RACE what do you call one mexican on the moon? problem what do you call ten mexicans on the moon
96 ORFflyer : Two good ole boys in an East Texas trailer park were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer. After a while the 1st guy says to 2nd, "If
97 Post contains images PAHS200 : what does an airplane and a women have in common? they both have cockpits michael sorry if this one was posted already i'm to lazy to read the whole t
98 Post contains images KaiGywer : Lots of good ones here guys, keep 'em coming
99 Post contains images DeltaAVL : What's long and hard for a black man? First Grade. *** How do you blindfold a chinese man? Dental floss. *** What's the difference between a Jew and a
100 Dougloid : Told to me by Joe Hammond of Eagle's Nest, New Mexico. A woman made a regular habit of going into a bar, drinking two pitchers of Coors and passing ou
101 Boeing744 : For British Columbians: What marks the border between China and India? The Fraser River.
102 Dougloid : Back when Jimmy Carter was prez this one made the rounds. When the Vatican announced that the Pope was going to visit the US, Carter put his best and
103 Xpat : What's the difference between a circus and a brothel? -One shows cunning stunts, the other, shows stunning c**ts. What's the difference between a woma
104 Post contains images AirPacific747 : Q:How do you break the nose on a blond? A:You show her a penis underneath a glass table Q: What's the first thing a blonde does when she wakes up in
105 Jafa39 : That would be two for me, they were both surprised as hell when they met!!!
106 Helvknight : How do you drown a blonde? Screw a mirror to the bottom of a swimming pool. How does a blonde turn the light on after sex? Open the car door. What's
107 Duff44 : What the difference between finding a lost golf ball and lady Godiva? -Finding the ball is a hunt on a course... What's the difference between a hunt
108 A380US : whats the diffrene between a black and a pie of pizza? a pizza can feed a family of 4 how do u no f a black womens pregnant? stick a banana up her v*g
109 Post contains images AirPacific747 : Good ones
110 Post contains images AustinAirport : YEP!!! Jesus its just a damn website
111 AeroWesty : A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rathe
112 Flybyguy : BTW last time I was in Japan most young people were pretty tall. But then again, I'm only 5'5".
113 FlashFlyGuy : Probably not that offensive, but I just got this in an email and had a chuckle.... A guy calls a company and orders their 5 Day /10 lb. weight loss pr
114 Zak : Q: What did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? A: "See you next month!" Why do Japanese Sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So you can
115 Torquewrench : Why are pubic hairs curly So they wont poke you in the eye. Why are cowgirls bowlegged? Cowboys like to eat with their hats on. If god had not meant f
116 Post contains images ORFflyer :
117 Zak : The priest in a small Irish village loved his chickens that he kept in the coop behind the church. One Sunday morning before mass, he went to feed the
118 QR332 : What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of five. - How many Ethiopians can you fit in a phone booth? All of the
119 Xpat : The ultimate Jewish dilema: Free pork.
120 AirPacific747 : You mean Muslim dilemma?
121 Post contains images Jamesbuk : 50 years ago they called 20 white guys chasing a black guy the KKK, now they call it Formula 1. rgds --James--
122 Post contains images ORFflyer : Or the PGA Tour. Why are they called a wife? All the other four-letter words were taken.
123 Post contains images Helvknight : An oldie but a goodie.
124 Bongo : In fact, There is one!!! (since 1.983)[Edited 2007-08-21 16:46:33]
125 Post contains images Helvknight : (I was going to select one of the non-av wingnuts but decided I don't want a ban just yet .... ) There was a neo-conservative that went to the hair sa
126 FlyDeltaJets87 : Q: What do Hiroshima, Nagaski, and Tehran all have in common? A: Nothing yet.
127 SBBRTech : Q: What´s the difference between argentinians and terrorists? A: Terrorists have sympathizers. Q: What´s the similarity between a humble argentinian
128 Helvknight : There were two truck drivers in a truck riding down the interstate when one of them told the other one he had to take a dump. Since they were on the r
129 Post contains images Duff44 : What language does a Jewish Homo speak? Heblew Isn't it ironic that the square root of 69 is 8-something?
130 COEWR737 : I'm sorry for this.... What do you call a black priest? Holy S**t
131 Post contains images Walter747 : Hahah i heard that on before. What do you call half the blck population on the moon...............a problem what do you call 3/4 of the black populat
132 ORFflyer : What has two legs and eats ants? Uncles.
133 Miamiair : What happens when a fly falls into a coffee cup? *The Englishman*: Throws away the cup of coffee and walks away . *The American*: Takes out the fly an
134 Tom in NO : What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes? Frosted Flakes. What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? S
135 ORFflyer : What did Abraham Lincoln say after he woke up from a three-day drunk? I freed who!? I am so going to hell..........
136 Miamiair : How do you get a Puerto Rican Girl Pregnant? Come in her shoes, let the flies do the rest? What's the difference between garbage and a girl from New J
137 Post contains images ORFflyer : Little boy goes to a whorehouse and knocks on the door. The Madame opens up and looks at him, "What do you want?" "I want hooker that has everything;
138 ORFflyer : Dear Abby: My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the beginning, and when I confront him, he denies everything. What's worse, eve
139 Post contains images Matt727 :
140 NAV20 : Have cordially to disagree, ORFflyer. There was a time - not SO long ago - when Hillary was the only woman in the whole of Washington DC who could ne
141 Post contains images ORFflyer : And then there's Monica. But your point is duly noted.
142 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : Oh man that's rough. Q: What does a blonde consider "safe-sex"? A: Using a padded headboard Q: How do you get a one armed blonde down from a tree? A:
143 Don81603 : How did Helen Keller go insane? Tried to read a stucco wall. What does FIAT stand for? Fix it again, Tony! What does Ford stand for? Fixed or repaired
144 Don81603 : What do you get when you cross a draft dodger and a lesbian? Chelsea Clinton
145 4holer : The mayor of Phoenix was very worried about a plague of pigeons in Phoenix. He could not remove the pigeons from the city. All of Phoenix was full of
146 Evan767 : I have black guys on my family tree. They're still hangin' there. No, but seriously, my grandfather's best friend was a black man...until he sold him.
147 Post contains images Fbgdavidson : That's one of my all time favourite jokes Q: What's the difference between toast and the French? A: You can make soldiers out of toast.
148 DL777LAX : I don't get it.
149 Post contains images AirTranTUS : Time for some more woman jokes. I haven't seen these ones in this thread, so here goes. What did God say when he made man? 'I can do better than this.
150 Smcmac32msn : f**ked over russian dumptruck
151 Post contains images Jafa39 : That was damn funny!!! Why do Russian cars have heated rear screens? So you can keep your hands warm while pushing them..
152 Don81603 : Epileptics shake violently and uncontrollably
153 DL777LAX : Not exactly, but w/e. I love: "why is tracey wrong? Because she's a women" I don't know if this has been said already. but Why couldn't Jesus be Mexi
154 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : I beat you to it, just with France instead of Mexico. Now: Q: Why are Democrats buried 100 feet below the ground? A: Because deep down, they're reall
155 GEEDO : What's that useless batch of skin above a woman's vagina? the woman What did the poor folks in Lockerbie get for Christmas in 1988? luggage Did you kn
156 DC10extender : In America, you learn about the government. In Soviet Russia, the government learns about you. A womans husband died and she heard about a man who cou
157 Asuflyer05 : What's the best part of a blowjob when you're married? The 5 minutes of silence.
158 Don81603 : What does 80 year old vagina taste like? Depends. Why are there so many homes for battered women? They just don't listen. Why do men die before their
159 FlyDeltaJets87 : A 767 is flying over the Atlantic when suddenly both engines fail. It is apparent the crew will have to ditch the aircraft in the ocean and the chance
160 DL777LAX : heres a simple joke, maybe a little too simple: Ethiopian food.
161 FlyDeltaJets87 : Reminds me of the one I heard from a friend: "Being a Democrat in the military is like sending Slim-Fast to Ethiopia. It's pointless". *Please, don't
162 DC10extender : Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.
163 JRadier : Thanks for the history lesson! I think we could update that one to: In America, the government learns about you too.
164 Torquewrench : 2 old gents sitting on the porch one day. The dog is lying in the yard licking his balls. One guy says to the other.."man, I wish I could do that." to
165 Helvknight : Why are there no Wal Marts in Iraq? Because there is a Target on every corner. I'm going to hell for that one.
166 GEEDO : Oops, beat me to it !
167 YYZflyer : What do you call a pole vaulting black person? Shit on a stick. What did god say when he created a black person? Shit, burnt another one. There was th
168 DL777LAX : Reminds me of *Borat Voice* In Soviet Russia, you no listen to iPod, iPod listen to you. *note, purposely grammatically f**ked up.
169 Planesarecool : What's faster than a penny rolling down a hill? The black man running after it. ----------- What's 6 ft tall, black and screams? Stevie Wonder answeri
170 JAGflyer : Why do copper wire factories not need machines? They just put a penny between two jews and voila! ------- What is the title of the new Korean cookbook
171 StarAC17 : Some Dead Baby ones. How many dead babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them What happens to a dead baby in a microw
172 Post contains images Pilotdude09 : Now for some Kiwi and Aussie Jokes, im a kiwi too and love when people take the piss out of us and sheep! ----------------------------------- A Kiwi w
173 JCKastrup : Among marine biologists they have a saying about shark-attacks "If a shark attacks you. Swim towards the shark and hit it between the eyes. If this do
174 Don81603 : A guy comes home and finds his best friend in bed with his wife. He shakes his head and says: "Frank, I have to screw her, but what's your excuse?" A
175 6YJJK : Q. Why do seagulls have wings? A. To beat the Scousers to the dump.
176 IFEMaster : You got that one wrong. It's supposed to be: What do you call a bunch of blacks at the bottom of Nelson's column? Pubic hair. (Yes, a reference to Ne
177 Planesarecool : What do you say to a Scouser with a job? Big Mac please. -------------------------------- What is the ideal weight of a scouser? About three pounds, i
178 Helvknight : Liverpool airport was closed for three hours due to a security alert today after Police found a suspicious vehicle in the car park. It had been parked
179 Cadet985 : Another version... What's the difference between a white fairy tale and a black fairy tale? A white fairy tale begins, "Once upon a time..." A black
180 Andz : Maybe that is too subtle for me but isn't Nelson's Column topped with a statue of Admiral Lord Horatio Nelson?? A guy goes to his dad and says "dad,
181 Post contains images Skidmarks : Youv'e SEEN Nelson Mandelas dick? Andy
182 Don81603 : Western fairy tales start with "Once upon a time..." Communist fairy tales start with "Tass news agency reports today that..."
183 FlyDeltaJets87 : Q: What happens to a Cuban when he gets a flat tire? A: He sinks.
184 Cxsjr : .... or GAY!
185 Post contains images EK20 :
186 UAL757 : All I can say about this thread is "Oh My God" and "LOL".
187 Andz : um.... yes....LOL
188 Post contains images EA CO AS : Why can't Stevie Wonder read? - Because he's black. Why does it take women so long to have an orgasm? - Who fucking cares? What's the best thing about
189 JRadier : LOL indeed.
190 Post contains images KaiGywer : Eh...yeah...
191 FlyDeltaJets87 : Have you ever seen Ray Charles's house? Well, neither has he.
192 Post contains images Scorpio : Wow, absolutely positively nothing gets by you, does it?
193 SW733 : I think I have heard something like that one, but replace truckloads with carloads...
194 747srule : Now that the NFL is starting a new season, I have a good joke. How do you keep Lions out of your frontyard? Put up goalposts!!!
195 Post contains images Kovi17 : Now I dont know much about NFL football, but my prediction is Pat Tillman will not win MVP I can already feel the heat at my feet from hell...
196 Sacamojus : Thats pretty low! The man lost his life in an unfortunate situation doing his job.
197 SW733 : Almost like it's a joke that will offend everyone...
198 Post contains images Cxsjr : .... urm, time to get some glasses me thinks! Moving on ....
199 Sabena340 : What’s the richest country in the world? Rwanda, the meat is just lying beside the roads over there. Why is it impossible for Arab kids to get sex-e
200 Freckles : Another one like that: What do you call four black people on the moon? Half moon. What do you call eight black people on the moon? Quarter moon. What
201 Post contains images Jamesbaldwyn : This one is pretty bad... Why did Hitler kill himself? Because he saw the gas bill. Sorry
202 KaiGywer : A little known fact about mayonnaise....... Please feel free to spread (you'll get it) this one around. Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hell
203 Post contains images Femme : >News just in, police have found a car bomb outside a mosque in London. >They've told the public not to worry, they've managed to push it inside!! ...
204 KaiGywer : How many perverts does it take to put in a lightbulb? Just one, but it takes the whole emergency room to get it out.
205 Charlienorth : A young American Indian boy has a question for his mother: "Mom how do we get our names?" "Well son after we give birth we leave the teepee and name o
206 6YJJK : Suicide bomber riding the Tube, sees a pretty young woman. One minute he's just staring at her t!ts, the next he's all over her.
207 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : Q: How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Just one, but it really gets screwed. Q: How many blondes does it take to unscrew a l
208 F4phantom : what is the difference between erotic and kinky ?........... erotic you use a feather...... kinky you use the whole chicken
209 SW733 : Likewise: How many sorority girls does it take to change a lightbulb? 5 - 1 to change it and 4 to make a shirt about it.
210 S.P.A.S. : Q: How you put 100 jews in a Mini Cooper? A: Inside the ashtrays
211 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : I have a cousin who will 'appreciate' that one. Anyway, kinda' cheesy but I'll post it anyway: A young kid is talking to a pirate with a wooden-peg l
212 Mhodgson : Shame Pavarotti died. I had a bet on him reaching 80. I've lost a tenor
213 Post contains images IFEMaster :
214 Post contains images LHRjc : haha nice one... Didn't take long
215 Post contains images CXfirst : omg these are f****** hilarious, keep it up. -CXfirst
216 Helvknight : Little Jonny goes into school after being absent the previous day, His teacher demands"Where were you yesterday?" "I'm sorry Miss,my dad got burnt" re
217 Post contains images LifelinerOne : Really bad black joke.... An American, German and Belgian are on a safari. After a busy day hunting they are on the porch of their cabin and bragging
218 Deskflier : More of the shortest books in World History: Jokes of Germany - Teutonic Humour during 500 years. Italian War Heroes since 475AD The Engineers Guide t
219 Post contains images Airdolomiti : Hilarious, keep them coming!
220 NAV20 : Chinese student draws his allowance from the bank, and finds himself short of cash because the Aussie dollar's gone up. "Nothing I can do about it, si
221 Post contains images Airdolomiti : OK, I should probably contribute to the thread too This one I heard from a friend a few days ago, it was in Italian but I hope it translates well in E
222 Post contains images 6YJJK : Classic! Knew a bloke who flew Swordfish during WWII - in fact, he brought his logbooks in once and showed us where he'd been credited with a hit on
223 Post contains images Femme : Whats worse than letting Michael Jackson babysit your kids? Letting the McCanns take them on holiday.......
224 Post contains images Skidmarks : Ooooooh! You are SO going to Hell!!!! Andy
225 Post contains images Planesarecool : What's the difference between Pope John Paul II and Madeleine McCann? The Pope died a virgin.
226 Post contains images CXfirst : ooooo...... seems hells the place for u too After this thread, I think we'll all be in hell Well, I'm ready to rest in hell for all eternity for thes
227 Don81603 : How does Micheal Jackson know it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand. What are the bumps around a woman's nipple? Braille for "Lick
228 Post contains images Kovi17 : haha omg that was nasty... but why am i laughing
229 Post contains images Planesarecool : New car being launched in Portugal, space in the boot for a child. Its called the Renault McCann. My place in hell was booked a long time ago
230 FlyDeltaJets87 : A bear and a mouse come across a magic lamp in the woods one day, and out comes a genie. He says to both of them "I will grant you each three wishes."
231 NAV20 : Nice ones, FlyDelta. Puts me in mind of this one. A little old lady was sitting shivering in her cottage in the depths of winter, sharing the few dry
232 Post contains images Femme : To save gas, Pavarotti will be cremated by microwave. As they say in Opera, it's not over til the fat B*****d pings.... To hell with me !!
233 Helvknight : Two weasels are sitting together at a bar drinking and having a conversation. One weasel starts to get belligerent and finally yells, "Oh yeah?! Well,
234 Post contains images Astuteman : Little old Lady in the queue in front of me at the cash machine, turns to me and says "Could you be a dear and check my balance for me?" So I pushed t
235 ORFflyer : Not offensive, but fairly funny - a poem. (I put this in the Superthread too) Ladies and Gentlemen, hobo's and tramps, cross-eyed mosquitos and bow-le
236 PanHAM : A man with a fat cat walked into a bar. The man lifted his cat onto the bar stool and ordered 12 beers and 12 hamburgers for him and the same for his
237 Post contains images Thepilot : One I'm sure everyone has heard before... One day the captain comes on the intercom and announces to the passengers that they will be delayed on the g
238 747438 : What's got one ball and fucks women ? Peter Sutcliffe's hammer. -------------------------------------------------- Renault have bought out a new model
239 Post contains images LifelinerOne : Another one... A man walks into a crowded bar and walks up the bar where a pretty woman is sitting. He gets next to her and out of nowhere the woman t
240 Andz : A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The barman says "fuck where did you get that?" The parrot says "Africa, there's millions o
241 Post contains images Planesarecool : Oh dear:
242 Don81603 : A vampire bat came flapping in from the night, face all covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty so
243 Planesarecool : Women are like parking spaces, normally all the good ones are gone. So, occasionally, when no one's looking, you stick it in a disabled one.
244 ZBBYLW : I love it. What is 6 inches long has a purple head and drives women wild. And aborted baby. Save room on the bus for me! Perhaps us being a.net guy w
245 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : Oh I already booked my plane ticket. I used my Skymiles. Flying DL through ATL on my way there. (And I figure hell can't be much worse than that, or
246 AirTranTUS : Wouldn't B6 through JFK be a better representation. I mean, you board, pushback, and then get and 8-hour tour of the airport from your tiny window. T
247 Torquewrench : 2 little old ladies who live in a retirement home decide to step outside for a smoke. Just after they light up it begins to rain. First old lady pulls
248 NAV20 : After a parade at Edinburgh Castle a Highland soldier in full regalia walked into a chemist's shop off Princes Street, produced a very battered-lookin
249 Don81603 : What do you do with 365 used condoms? Melt them down and make a tire out of them and call it a Goodyear. How do you recycle a condom? turn it inside o
250 FRAspotter : Why are black people such fast runners? -Because all the slow ones are already in jail! Why did the Mexicans create refried beans? -Have you ever hear
251 Helvknight : A man walked into a church, stepped into the confessional and said to the priest, "Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four kids and 11 grandchild
252 Helvknight : 40 Scousers arrived at heaven's gates, St Peter said we've only got room for 12 so decide amongst yourselves who's coming in. 5 minutes later St Peter
253 Helvknight : A little old lady went into the Bank of England one day, carrying a bag of money. She insisted that she must speak with the president of the bank to o
254 Cumulus : Woman pulls a black man in a nightclub and says "Show me it's true about what they say about black men" - so he stabs her and steals her handbag. Cumu
255 A342 : God forgive me this one! What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream in the oven! --------------------------------------
256 YVRLTN : This reminds me of one from a few years ago... Gary Glitter has been appointed the new England coach - he has already put Seaman in the under 16's...
257 TBCITDG : You know your Italian when: * At some point of your life you where a DJ * when you have been to a funeral where talk of the deceased is "he soulda kep
258 Confuscius : Q: Which of the following doesn't belong: wife, meat, eggs, blow job? A: The blow job. You can beat your wife, your eggs, or your meat; but you just c
259 BNE : Three newly married men were having a drink and telling each other about the duties they had assigned to their wives on their return from honeymoon. T
260 Runway777 : whats with the hatred towards lawyers.. like i see it, but if i wasnt a pilot id easliy be a lawyer..
261 Blackbird : This one's totally lame, but "Confucious say -- Men who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with smelly finger" Andrea Kent
262 Post contains images DeltaAVL :
263 Post contains images Thepilot : Being from Washington State, I love this one! Here's a few good ones my Jewish friend told me today. What's the difference between a canoe and a Jew?
264 LAXspotter : LOL, ROTFL I'm writing these jokes down as we speak, what an awesome thread.
265 Post contains images Nighthawk : why do brazilians have such big dicks? So they can lob seaman from 40 yards Whats the difference between American Airlines and Pan Am? American takes
266 Helvknight : Letter from Grandpa to Grandson: "Dear Grandson, I am not as strong as I used to be, and since you are in jail, you are not here this year to help me
267 JAGflyer : Confusious say: "man who stands on toilet is high on pot"
268 Post contains images ShannoninAMA : Not really offensive, but funny A daughter has been set up with Four blind dates, and her (very protective) dad is interviewing each one before he tak
269 Post contains images Astuteman : "Confucious he say - Man who fart in church sit in own pew.........."
270 Duff44 : Confucious say: Man with holes in pockets feel cocky all day
271 Post contains images Jamesbuk : I've just loaded "Colin McRae's Helicopter Simulator" onto my PC, but it keeps crashing! What's worse then having the McCanns take your kids on holida
272 Fbgdavidson : Two similar ones... The Ferrari F1 Team recently fired the whole pit-crew to employ some young unemployed youths from Liverpool. The decision to hire
273 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they made passiona
274 Mal787 : How do you save a drowning child Take your foot of its head I love kids
275 Post contains images Skidmarks : Yeah, I love kids too, and babies..................................................................... Couldn't eat a whole one though! Andy
276 Helvknight : If the Glasgow terrorist attack had happened in a US airport. Eyewitness accounts: America:"Oh my God! There was a man on fire, he was running about,
277 Post contains images Femme : Well fed up.... I have just spent £60 on a new computer game and it keeps crashing. Bloody Colin McRae Helicopter Simulator is shite ! Whoops........
278 Deskflier : When I went to the grocery store today I saw a flyer someone put on the noticeboard at the entrance. It was about baby bunnies for sale. Suddenly I go
279 Post contains images Jamesbuk : hehe Its a sad day for British rally, first Richard Burns then so does Colin McRae. Rgds --James--
280 Post contains images ShannoninAMA : Whats the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family of four.
281 Confuscius : Q: How do you make your wife scream after sex for an hour? A: Wipe your dick on the curtains Q: And how do you make your wife scream louder? A: Screw
282 Helvknight : A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in West Virginia . With his dummy on his knee, he starts go
283 Texan : This isn't offensive, I just like it. A woman goes into her doctor and says, "Doctor, every time I sneeze I have an orgasm!" The doctor says, "Well, a
284 Tercer : What did Micheal Jackson love the most about having sex with little boys at Neverland? --- Thier little hands made his dick look bigger! What did Mich
285 Don81603 : Why do women get PMS? They deserve it. What the quickest way to a woman's heart? Right through her ribcage. What do you get when a mine caves in? A fl
286 Post contains images EI747SYDNEY : Why do women wear make up and perfume?? Because they are ugly and they smell..........
287 Charlienorth : The shortest books on my bookshelf: 1. Polish wit and wisdom 2. Great Italian military victories 3. Negroes I've meet while yachting
288 BNE : Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive? If you answered yes to any of these que
289 InbarD : 1. What did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike 2. How long did it take an abbo to take a shit? 9 months 3. What can a pizza do that an abbo ca
290 Deskflier : Farmer John was thinking that his rooster was getting too old, so he decided to replace him. It had been a long time coming, but now it was going to h
291 CJAContinental : How do you sink an irish submarine? Knock on the door.
292 Mhodgson : What is a curry-lovers favourite ring tone? Red
293 Nighthawk : what do you do if an irishman throws a grenade at you? Pull out the pin and throw it back Alternate version: "Stewardess" "Yes, Sir?" "I want to comp
294 Don81603 : Why do gay men used ribbed condoms? Traction in the mud.
295 NoelG : What do gay people see hemorrhoids as? Speed bumps Do you know Leicester is the home of the outboard motor? Bud...bud...bud...bud....bud...
296 EWRCabincrew : Q. What do you call a bouncer at a gay bar? A. A flame thrower. _________________ Q. Two gay guys and two lesbians are in a coast to coast race. Who w
297 RicciPettit : Two old men with alzheimers go out for the day. They end up in a park around midday and as the weather is sunny they decided to eat in the park. One s
298 EWRCabincrew : Two species of dinosaurs were discovered to be homosexual. They were the megasaurass and the lickalotapuss.
299 ORFflyer : When man and woman were being created - it was decided to cut the d%#ks off of the dumb ones.
300 YYZflyer : Why is a gun better than a woman? Because you can buy a silencer for the gun.
301 Don81603 : A white kid and a black kid are arguing over what colour God is, so they decide to just ask him. From the sky, a voice booms down "I am what I am." Th
302 Miamiair : TWO OLD MEN DECIDE THEY ARE CLOSE TO THEIR LAST DAYS AND DECIDE TO HAVE A LAST NIGHT ON THE TOWN. AFTER A FEW DRINKS, THEY END UP AT THE LOCAL BROTHEL
303 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : I don't know about the Ebonics part, but there was a black congresswoman who did complain about the names of hurricanes not having "black names". And
304 Confuscius : Q. What did the Queen Mother and Princess Diana have in common? A. They both died at about 100 Q. What's 16 inches long and makes a woman scream all n
305 SaturnVRocket : Q: What's so funny about MCOflyer's jokes? A: The responses from other a.net members.
306 LAXspotter : VERY SIMILAR TO THE AFRICAN AMERICAN JOKES
307 Torquewrench : why do dogs lick thier balls? Because they can't make a fist! Why do farts stink? So deaf people can enjoy them too.
308 EmiratesA345 : Oddly enough I heard this one from a Jewish guy and the people I've told have interpretted it differently. Q: Why do Jewish men not like to eat pussy?
309 Deskflier : Made me remember a story I saw on another forum: Two Cardinals fans died in a traffic accident. As neither of them had been God's best child they bot
310 Bofredrik : This stories was told in my school when i was around 10 years old. What killed Hitler? - The gas bill. What was the no 1 hit on the German hit list 19
311 Nitrohelper : What's three things you can't give an African-American? a fat lip, a black eye, and a job ! What you call a black guy with no arms , or legs? Trustwor
312 Charles79 : I heard this variation (from a German perspective): A German actor walks into the doctor's office and says "in order to play the part of a Polish man
313 Columba : 1) "One thing you will likely never see: A Chinese at the patent office" 2) "Why do men come intermittent ? So it is easier for women to swallow"
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