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Why Men Don't Write Advice Columns  
User currently onlineDreadnought From United States of America, joined Feb 2008, 8790 posts, RR: 24
Posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 1 day 8 hours ago) and read 1464 times:

Recieved by email. Worth a good chuckle...

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Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a mile down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbor lady making mad passionate love to her. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the past six months.

I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get through to him anymore.

Can you please help?

Sincerely,
Mrs. Sheila Usk

------------------------------ ------------------------------ ------------------------------ ----------------

Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.


I hope this helps.


Walter


Veni Vidi Castratavi Illegitimos
16 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineN243NW From United States of America, joined Jul 2003, 1626 posts, RR: 20
Reply 1, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 1 day 8 hours ago) and read 1433 times:

 rotfl  This is great!

That columnist has a bright journalistic future ahead of him.



B-52s don't take off. They scare the ground away.
User currently offlineBR715-A1-30 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 2, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 1 day 8 hours ago) and read 1423 times:

That's GREAT!!! I love it... Walter says nothing that could help her with the real situation.. He sees CAR TROUBLE and begins-a-typin.

User currently offlineHAWK21M From India, joined Jan 2001, 31667 posts, RR: 56
Reply 3, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 1 day 2 hours ago) and read 1356 times:

Nice one  Smile
regds
MEL



Think of the brighter side!
User currently offlineSan747 From United States of America, joined Dec 2004, 4941 posts, RR: 12
Reply 4, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 1 day ago) and read 1336 times:

Best laugh of the day!!! Big grin I'm passing that on to some friends...


Scotty doesn't know...
User currently offlineZKSUJ From New Zealand, joined May 2004, 7086 posts, RR: 12
Reply 5, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 1 day ago) and read 1319 times:

Wow, brilliant Big grin

SUJ


User currently offlineSudden From Sweden, joined Jul 2001, 4130 posts, RR: 6
Reply 6, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 22 hours ago) and read 1288 times:

This is the reason why men SHOULD give advice. She forgot all about the real problem.
Just brilliant though. Big grin

Aim for the sky!
Sudden



When in doubt, flat out!
User currently offlineFalstaff From United States of America, joined Jun 2006, 6075 posts, RR: 29
Reply 7, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 19 hours ago) and read 1248 times:
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Quoting Dreadnought (Thread starter):
it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.

Depending on the age of car that would probably not be the problem anyway. I can't speak for the world, but there has not been a car sold in the USA with a carburetor since the 1991 model year.

Quoting Dreadnought (Thread starter):
check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold

Also poor advice. First off what is a jubilee clip? Second; if it did have a vacuum leak big enough to cause the engine to stall it would do that all the time not after it was driven for a while.

Quoting BR715-A1-30 (Reply 2):
He sees CAR TROUBLE and begins-a-typin.

Not only did he not help this woman with her husband trouble he didn't do much for her car trouble either.

Quoting Dreadnought (Thread starter):
Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line.

How would you check that? You would have to flush it. After you flush it you will see crud or not see crud. You just can't look in there. He didn't even mention a fuel filter clogged with debris which is a much more common problem.



My mug slaketh over on Falstaff N503
User currently offlineSoku39 From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 1797 posts, RR: 9
Reply 8, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 19 hours ago) and read 1240 times:



Quoting Falstaff (Reply 7):

Not only did he not help this woman with her husband trouble he didn't do much for her car trouble either.

Are you serious? It's a joke. Everyone knows cars are fuel injected, but take it for what it's worth and laugh.



The Ohio Player
User currently offlineFalstaff From United States of America, joined Jun 2006, 6075 posts, RR: 29
Reply 9, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 19 hours ago) and read 1228 times:
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Quoting Soku39 (Reply 8):
Are you serious? It's a joke. Everyone knows cars are fuel injected, but take it for what it's worth and laugh.

I was pointing out that this guy didn't solve any problems. Not everyone knows cars are fuel injected. I meet people all the time that have no idea what fuel injecting is or what a carburetor is. I have had people bring me late model cars for repair and say I think the carb needs adjusted and they don't even have one.



My mug slaketh over on Falstaff N503
User currently offlineSudden From Sweden, joined Jul 2001, 4130 posts, RR: 6
Reply 10, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 18 hours ago) and read 1215 times:



Quoting Falstaff (Reply 9):
have had people bring me late model cars for repair and say I think the carb needs adjusted and they don't even have one.

Or when they want the sparkplugs changed, on a diesel!
That one is priceless!

Aim for the sky!
Sudden



When in doubt, flat out!
User currently offlineScbriml From United Kingdom, joined Jul 2003, 12390 posts, RR: 46
Reply 11, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 18 hours ago) and read 1215 times:
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Quoting Falstaff (Reply 7):
First off what is a jubilee clip?

 Wow!




Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana!
User currently offlineFalstaff From United States of America, joined Jun 2006, 6075 posts, RR: 29
Reply 12, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 18 hours ago) and read 1201 times:
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Quoting Scbriml (Reply 11):
Quoting Falstaff (Reply 7):
First off what is a jubilee clip?


I never have heard it called that before. I always hear it called a band clamp or a worm clamp.



My mug slaketh over on Falstaff N503
User currently offlineB78710 From United Kingdom, joined Mar 2006, 340 posts, RR: 0
Reply 13, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 14 hours ago) and read 1146 times:

i think thats from the daily sport isnt it?

User currently offlineBR715-A1-30 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 14, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 12 hours ago) and read 1118 times:



Quoting Falstaff (Reply 12):
I always hear it called a band clamp

This one time, we used a band clamp, and...


User currently onlineDreadnought From United States of America, joined Feb 2008, 8790 posts, RR: 24
Reply 15, posted (6 years 5 months 1 week 12 hours ago) and read 1108 times:



Quoting BR715-A1-30 (Reply 14):
This one time, we used a band clamp, and...

Oh, GROOOOOOAAAANNNN!!!!



Veni Vidi Castratavi Illegitimos
User currently offlineFridgmus From United States of America, joined Oct 2006, 1442 posts, RR: 11
Reply 16, posted (6 years 5 months 6 days 19 hours ago) and read 1055 times:
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Quoting Scbriml (Reply 11):

I've known that as a Hose Clamp! Used them on my dirt bikes when I was a kid!

Well said Walter, well said (even with the automotive mistakes!)  bigthumbsup 



The Lockheed Super Constellation, the REAL Queen of the Skies!
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