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You Know You've Chosen A "No-Frills" Airline When:  
User currently offlineAMSMAN From Ireland, joined Jan 2002, 1016 posts, RR: 6
Posted (12 years 6 months 20 hours ago) and read 1063 times:

You Know You've chosen a "No-Frills" airline when...

1) They don't sell tickets, they sell chances.
2) All the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out.
3) Before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot.
4) You cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change.
5) Before you took off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro.
6) The Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas.
7) When they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking.
8) The Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.
9) You ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he sez, "Just once."
10) No movie. Don't need one. Your life keeps flashing before your eyes.
11) You see a man with a gun, but he's demanding to be let off the plane.
12) All the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.

AMSMAN


Aer Lingus, Proud to be Irish.
7 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineLj From Netherlands, joined Nov 1999, 4419 posts, RR: 0
Reply 1, posted (12 years 6 months 19 hours ago) and read 1036 times:

13) Passengers may vote on whether the plane will continue fyling after an engine fire and all passengers chose to fly further.

User currently offlineBanco From United Kingdom, joined Oct 2001, 14752 posts, RR: 53
Reply 2, posted (12 years 6 months 18 hours ago) and read 1033 times:

A high proportion of the passengers paid bugger all for their ticket????? Big grin


She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
User currently offlineSabenapilot From Belgium, joined Feb 2000, 2714 posts, RR: 46
Reply 3, posted (12 years 6 months 18 hours ago) and read 1028 times:

14) you are requested to push the plane to the rwy before boarding it.

User currently offlineRedngold From United States of America, joined Mar 2000, 6907 posts, RR: 44
Reply 4, posted (12 years 6 months 18 hours ago) and read 1022 times:

The pre-flight safety instructions include the following:

"In the event of a water landing, please find the nearest obese passenger and hold on to them."

redngold



Up, up and away!
User currently offlineEGGD From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2001, 12443 posts, RR: 35
Reply 5, posted (12 years 6 months 17 hours ago) and read 996 times:

You are assigned to seat 'beanbag 11a'.

User currently offlinePPGMD From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 2453 posts, RR: 0
Reply 6, posted (12 years 6 months 17 hours ago) and read 991 times:

When is routine procedure to glide in for landing at the airport.

When its help wanted ad says. Wanted glider pilots with ATP.



At worst, you screw up and die.
User currently offlineStaffan From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 7, posted (12 years 6 months 17 hours ago) and read 989 times:

(18) There are rude comments about other airlines printed on the fuselage.  Big grin

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