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Ted Haggard - More Gay Sex  
User currently offlineMariner From New Zealand, joined Nov 2001, 25429 posts, RR: 86
Posted (5 years 9 months 4 days 2 hours ago) and read 2427 times:
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With the documentary about Ted Haggard coming to HBO, another young man has come forward about his relationship with the preacher:

http://www.denverpost.com/breakingnews/ci_11540936

"Disgraced evangelical leader Ted Haggard's former church disclosed Friday that the gay sex scandal that caused his downfall extends to a young male church volunteer who reported having a sexual relationship with Haggard — a revelation that comes as Haggard tries to repair his public image."

The Senior Pastor at the church said: "... the church reached a legal settlement to pay the man for counseling and college tuition, with one condition being that none of the parties involved discuss the matter publicly."

But that:

"Boyd said he had spoken to the man once and came away with the impression that he was speaking out because of the documentary.

"I think what caused this young man to be a bit aggravated was Ted being seen as a victim, when he himself had experienced a great deal of hurt," Boyd said."


It's the old story - which is worse, the original lie or the cover-up?

I have some sympathy with Haggard. I understand that he is trying to rehabilitate himself and I agree when he says that "sexuality can't be put into stereotypical boxes."

But in this case, it appears that it can - a box marked hypocrisy.

mariner


aeternum nauta
14 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineSeb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11720 posts, RR: 15
Reply 1, posted (5 years 9 months 4 days 2 hours ago) and read 2412 times:

I don't understand why people get so wraped up in religion that they have to lie. That is really, really bad in any religion. I grew up in a church where lying is wrong no matter what. They have met two of my partners and are fine with it. I pray, I am honest, I do what I believe is right and just and, my church family supports me and I them.

But, when a person has to lie to a church, there is something very very wrong. Paying someone "hush money" is wrong. I would not want to read the book these people were issued and told it is the Bible.



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineFlighty From United States of America, joined Apr 2007, 8640 posts, RR: 2
Reply 2, posted (5 years 9 months 4 days 1 hour ago) and read 2364 times:



Quoting Mariner (Thread starter):
I have some sympathy with Haggard. I understand that he is trying to rehabilitate himself

You do? Rehabilitate himself from what? Having sex? Or preaching?


User currently offlineCharles79 From Puerto Rico, joined Mar 2007, 1331 posts, RR: 6
Reply 3, posted (5 years 9 months 4 days ago) and read 2336 times:

As a gay man I find it odd that some gay men choose to live a forced heterosexual life rather than just accept who they are and move on (unless he's bi, but I doubt it). I know it's not easy to grow up in an intolerant church (as I did) or so immersed into a religion that you end up questioning yourself and who you are. Moreover, being openly is still not as socially accepted in the US as some might think, with parts of the country still decidedly homophobic. In the end, though, all he's doing is hurting himself and those around him.

Quoting Flighty (Reply 2):
Rehabilitate himself from what? Having sex? Or preaching?

I wish someone could explain what "rehabilitation" means in this context.


User currently offlineMariner From New Zealand, joined Nov 2001, 25429 posts, RR: 86
Reply 4, posted (5 years 9 months 3 days 22 hours ago) and read 2261 times:
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Quoting Flighty (Reply 2):
You do? Rehabilitate himself from what? Having sex? Or preaching?

I should have said "come to terms with himself." It seems to be a difficult journey for him.

mariner



aeternum nauta
User currently offlineUAL747 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 5, posted (5 years 9 months 3 days 22 hours ago) and read 2238 times:



Quoting Charles79 (Reply 3):
I wish someone could explain what "rehabilitation" means in this context.

My original thinking was that he was going to "Rehabilitate" himself from being gay. And yes, homophobia is rampant, in any race of people in the United States I've sadly found.

I can give you a whole laundry list of what the christians use to "rehab" their gay members. Very archaic, emotionally traumatizing, which has been known to cause PTSD.

UAL


User currently offlineDougloid From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 6, posted (5 years 9 months 3 days 19 hours ago) and read 2182 times:

Someone once said that at a certain age a man's got to stop thinking about the man he wants to be and start thinking about the man he's become.

He's got a lot to work through.

It may make a better man of him in the end when he realizes that the hypocrisy got him nothing. He may even become a decent person and do good works among the people who need his gifts the most-and these are not middle class white people filled with hate.


User currently offlineSeb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11720 posts, RR: 15
Reply 7, posted (5 years 9 months 3 days 7 hours ago) and read 2033 times:



Quoting Charles79 (Reply 3):
some gay men choose to live a forced heterosexual life rather than just accept who they are and move on (unless he's bi, but I doubt it).

I think some people have been so endoctrinated that homosexuality is so wrong that they must live like this. They must live lies so deeply some end up with horrible diseases, beating their wives and children, alcoholics, drug addicts, or commiting suicide. I guess some people feel religion is just that important.



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineYellowstone From United States of America, joined Aug 2006, 3071 posts, RR: 4
Reply 8, posted (5 years 9 months 3 days 4 hours ago) and read 1934 times:

From singing comedian Roy Zimmerman, "Ted Haggard is Completely Heterosexual"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZmHC75FDqQ&feature=channel

[Edited 2009-01-25 12:22:20]


Hydrogen is an odorless, colorless gas which, given enough time, turns into people.
User currently offlineDocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 19954 posts, RR: 59
Reply 9, posted (5 years 9 months 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 1851 times:

I wonder if reporting all this accomplishes anything.

I dunno. I feel better about it, but I feel like it's not just a public skewering.

I think hate in your heart will rule you and that those with hate in their hearts will not cease to have it because a hatemonger turned out to be a hidden one of the hated who had no reason to hide.


User currently offlineDougloid From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 10, posted (5 years 9 months 2 days 19 hours ago) and read 1785 times:



Quoting DocLightning (Reply 9):
I wonder if reporting all this accomplishes anything.

I dunno. I feel better about it, but I feel like it's not just a public skewering.

If it gets one person in one pew in one church to think for one moment "There but for the grace of G-d go I." then it's worth the effort.

See, it's because Christ was a teacher and a healer who found his place among the wretched and despised of the earth. Imagine-consorting with tax collectors and common street hookers. The greatest virtue is charity and humility.

Not at all like his Dad.


User currently offlineTugger From United States of America, joined Apr 2006, 5676 posts, RR: 10
Reply 11, posted (5 years 9 months 2 days 18 hours ago) and read 1751 times:



Quoting UAL747 (Reply 5):
My original thinking was that he was going to "Rehabilitate" himself from being gay. And yes, homophobia is rampant, in any race of people in the United States I've sadly found.

I can give you a whole laundry list of what the christians use to "rehab" their gay members. Very archaic, emotionally traumatizing, which has been known to cause PTSD.

You know, if you listened to what many religious people claim, it seems all someone would have to do is admit that they are homosexual but not live the "lifestyle" and those religious people would love them, but that's not how it is at all. If you admit to your nature and understand that it is OK, then you are vilified and condemned. This hate the sin but love the sinner is crap. Those people couldn't live that truth if they tried (really, actually tried rather than just spouting it as some kind of cliche). They need to just admit that they just can't handle people different than they are.

Tugg



I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. -W. Shatner
User currently offlineFlighty From United States of America, joined Apr 2007, 8640 posts, RR: 2
Reply 12, posted (5 years 9 months 2 days 18 hours ago) and read 1748 times:

Well it's good they reported it because the Haggard guy was a real pain. HE made it a public matter. HE asked for it. He created the whole situation. We are just commenting on it.

Maybe it is an example of the powers of self-hatred. Do people take intolerant views against themselves? When they do, what is the result? Say Ted was always gay and he couldn't change, which made him psychotic. Then, it spilled into eloquent and energetic "jesus fervor" and anti-homosexuality. He was at war with liberals and homosexuality because he was at war with that part of himself.

This was dangerous and ugly, just look at Youtube videos of him. He is/was frightening.


User currently offlineTugger From United States of America, joined Apr 2006, 5676 posts, RR: 10
Reply 13, posted (5 years 9 months 2 days 17 hours ago) and read 1723 times:



Quoting Flighty (Reply 12):
Maybe it is an example of the powers of self-hatred. Do people take intolerant views against themselves? When they do, what is the result? Say Ted was always gay and he couldn't change, which made him psychotic. Then, it spilled into eloquent and energetic "jesus fervor" and anti-homosexuality. He was at war with liberals and homosexuality because he was at war with that part of himself.

I think its based on the human need to understand why they are as they are as they are, and to control it. But its not just the preacher, it's the bully that becomes the judge, the kid that can't relate easily to the people around him that becomes the psychologist, the person who questions what they believe and are who becomes a minister, and many others.

It's not all the people in these positions (not in any way) but I hope you know what I mean.

Tugg



I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. -W. Shatner
User currently offlineAaron747 From Japan, joined Aug 2003, 8184 posts, RR: 26
Reply 14, posted (5 years 9 months 2 days 17 hours ago) and read 1720 times:

I just don't get why HBO is making a documentary of it. Who cares about this man's sad story of hypocrisy and self-delusion? He made his bed. Let's put this one to rest for good.


If you need someone to blame / throw a rock in the air / you'll hit someone guilty
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