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How Do You Know You Are In Love?  
User currently offlinebaexecutive From United Kingdom, joined Jul 2005, 740 posts, RR: 0
Posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 21 hours ago) and read 3952 times:

It might seem like a silly question but how do you know you are in love with someone? And how did you meet your current partner?

I'm 29 and have probably only been in love once (last partner that I was with for 5 years) I've met someone else but not sure if its love or just infatuation....how can you tell the difference?

Would love to hear your experiences and thoughts.

J

47 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineShyFlyer From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 1, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 21 hours ago) and read 3928 times:

I thought I was in love once...turned out to be bad chicken. True story.

User currently offlineAirstud From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 2660 posts, RR: 3
Reply 2, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3920 times:

There's only one time in my life when I _knew_ I was in love; and how I knew was that when I talked with this person or thought about her, the world blurred.

Three years previous, there was a girl in my then-current workplace whom I enjoyed flirting with, but knew she was married pretty much the moment I met her. I think about her, and how (inappropriately) I behaved toward her, but have always resisted the thought that I was in love with her, for at least two reasons: A) I knew she was married, i.e., off limits, and for some reason trusted (with my stupidly computer-like mind) that this knowledge would prevent my love circuits from carrying current, and B) Around her, I never felt any of the blurriness or stars around my head, like I later would feel, about a different person.

The collection of these experience makes me think that maybe the way you fall in love, the "indicators," are different each time it happens. And why not? Part of what makes it falling in love, is that it's unique.



Pancakes are delicious.
User currently offlineFly2HMO From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 3, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3915 times:

Quoting baexecutive (Thread starter):
How Do You Know You Are In Love?

When you feel an incredibly painful, scalding and urgent inner sensation to give a female one of these:



  


User currently offlineFX772LRF From United States of America, joined Apr 2009, 675 posts, RR: 12
Reply 4, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3896 times:

Quoting Fly2HMO (Reply 3):

What, a flight tracker? What's she going to do with that? She's got to learn the black magic behind it and everything!

-Noah   



Cleared to IAH via CLL 076 radial/BAZBL/RIICE3, up to 3k, 7k in 10, departure on 134.3, squawk 4676, Colgan 9581.
User currently offlineMarSciGuy From United States of America, joined Jun 2007, 549 posts, RR: 0
Reply 5, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3883 times:

My fiance and I met originally via Myspace of all places....didn't actually meet in person for a year, but sent emails back and forth for that year, getting to know one another as friends would first - we didn't start dating til, as I said, a bit after a year had passed when we first met in person. 3 days after our first date I was sent to sea for 3 weeks, and continued 3 weeks at sea and on land for two and a half years following that first date.

Hw did I know I was in love? I knew that there could be a future for us (more than a single date at least) after getting back from the first 3 weeks at sea after our first date and she wasn't put off by the prospect of me continuing that job for several years to come. Over time I became much more aware that yes, this was "true love" as whenever we have had disagreements things were worked out quickly and easily without the mercurial ups and downs of some relationships. Additionally, every time I went to sea starting after a couple of dates I began to miss having her around, being able to see her smile, etc...

Anyways, I'll end this post there, but....hopefully a) that helps and b) it wasn't too mushy for the majority of people on these boards....

MarSciGuy



"There weren't a ton of gnats there where a ton of gnats and their families as well!"
User currently offlinexjramper From United States of America, joined Dec 2003, 2460 posts, RR: 51
Reply 6, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3879 times:

Quoting Fly2HMO (Reply 3):
When you feel an incredibly painful, scalding and urgent inner sensation to give a female one of these:

So they fill those things with acid (the burning, scalding kind not the trippin' kind) then?  

xjr



Look ma' no hands!
User currently offlinePhoenix9 From Canada, joined Aug 2007, 2546 posts, RR: 8
Reply 7, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3868 times:

Quoting baexecutive (Thread starter):

When you start putting up with shit that you normally wouldn't....you are in love.



Life only makes sense when you look at it backwards.
User currently offlinelincoln From United States of America, joined Nov 2004, 3887 posts, RR: 8
Reply 8, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 20 hours ago) and read 3859 times:

Quoting Airstud (Reply 2):
There's only one time in my life when I _knew_ I was in love; and how I knew was that when I talked with this person or thought about her, the world blurred.

Ahh, damn.

Part of me was hoping it was just the side effects of my attempting to cook.



CO Is My Airline of Choice || Baggage Claim is an airline's last chance to disappoint a customer || Next flts in profile
User currently offlineFly2HMO From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 9, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 3784 times:

Quoting xjramper (Reply 6):
So they fill those things with acid (the burning, scalding kind not the trippin' kind) then?

Yes. Useful so when she ditches you, cheats on you, uses you, and/or otherwise screws you in a way you don't appreciate to be screwed, you can shatter it in her face, and with the acid she remains physycally scarred for life, therefore serving as a warning for other men to avoid said nasty woman.

Kinda like in the Inglorious Basterds movie, where a swastika was carved on the Nazi soldiers forehead...

What? Too drastic you say?   

Quoting Phoenix9 (Reply 7):
When you start putting up with shit that you normally wouldn't....you are in love.

Either that or you are f'ing stupid  

[Edited 2010-03-17 15:21:16]

User currently offlineB6JFKH81 From United States of America, joined Mar 2006, 2882 posts, RR: 7
Reply 10, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 3766 times:

Quoting baexecutive (Thread starter):
It might seem like a silly question but how do you know you are in love with someone? And how did you meet your current partner?

I'm 29 and have probably only been in love once (last partner that I was with for 5 years) I've met someone else but not sure if its love or just infatuation....how can you tell the difference?

Would love to hear your experiences and thoughts.

It is VERY hard to put into words, and each person will vary. But BELIEVE ME when I say, you will know when cupids arrow hits you right in the butt.

I am also 29, and divorced as of September (not a bad divorce either). I have never felt the way I felt about my (now ex-) husband with anyone else. There is a feelings of "I would give my life for this person, and trust my life to this person", "if it were the last few minutes of my life, I would want to spend them with this person", and "I have never felt more comfortable in every possible way with anyone like I do with this person".

It's a long story how my ex-hubby and I got together, but we shared some of the best years of my life thus far together, and we continue to be really good friends...which goes to show that it was true love because it will never die, just change over time as some love does.

~H81



"If you do not learn from history, you are doomed to repeat it"
User currently offlineTeamAmerica From United States of America, joined Sep 2006, 1761 posts, RR: 23
Reply 11, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 3753 times:

Quoting baexecutive (Thread starter):
I'm 29 and have probably only been in love once (last partner that I was with for 5 years) I've met someone else but not sure if its love or just infatuation....how can you tell the difference?

If you are certain you are in love and it's perfect and you are the luckiest person on Earth to feel so good and believe it's going to stay this way forever...that's infatuation. Enjoy the ride.   Don't get married.  

If you are still together after 5 years and it's boring and she drives you crazy but at the same time you can't imagine life without her...that's love. Get married, have kids, grow old together. That's as good as it gets, and don't torture yourself thinking there's something better out there somewhere.
Perfection is unobtainable.  

Consider your favorite old shoes. They are comfortable and you don't care so much if they get dirty, but you don't brag to your buddies about them anymore. That's a good marriage. Booze helps.  



Failure is not an option; it's an outcome.
User currently offlineUAL747 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 12, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 3741 times:

I've been in love once. The relationship lasted for 2 years. I think you know you are in love when breaking up is murder on you. I don't think you will ever be able to know the scope of your love for any one person until that person is not in your life.

I think you know you are in love when you are willing to do more for that person than you would for yourself. When you want to protect that person, and honor that person. All selfishness goes away and your life becomes entirely about their happiness. Sucky part is if they don't feel the same way, while you are doing all of this.

Hopefully, one day, I will allow myself to be in love again. (Not hung up on my last love, just a ton of issues surrounding relationships in general for me).

UAL


User currently offlinetugger From United States of America, joined Apr 2006, 5525 posts, RR: 8
Reply 13, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 3726 times:

Quoting xjramper (Reply 6):
acid (the burning, scalding kind not the trippin' kind)

Well, for love, both can apply actually.... 
.
Quoting B6JFKH81 (Reply 10):
I have never felt the way I felt about my (now ex-) husband with anyone else. There is a feelings of "I would give my life for this person, and trust my life to this person", "if it were the last few minutes of my life, I would want to spend them with this person", and "I have never felt more comfortable in every possible way with anyone like I do with this person".

  

I will add that it is most certainly not some one sided feeling either. You can't be "in" a room if the place just has one wall/side. The same goes for actually being "in love", it is something that occurs between two people not just one of them.

I knew I was in love when I wanted to be with the person and they wanted to be with me. I knew I was in love when, if I was mad at the person, I wanted to not stay mad, and they didn't want to stay mad either (after that period of time when you really just want to be mad  ). I have found love in the person that supports and works by me in life and wants me to succeed in my goals just I want them to succeed in theirs! And happily our strengths compliment each other and our weakness tend to be canceled out by the other, so we are stronger together as a team.

We support each other, we want to be together at the end of the day (most of the time), we have similar goals in life, and most importantly... we love each other.

Oh and too add, I hope that I am never "out of love". To accomplish that I do work at it. Being in love is both easy and hard at the same time. It takes effort, but importantly from both people involved, and if it is real it is relatively effortless.

So put simply it is a huge contradiction, but a very worthwhile contradiction.  cloudnine   boggled 

Tugg

[Edited 2010-03-17 16:09:46]


I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. -W. Shatner
User currently offlineajd1992 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 14, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 19 hours ago) and read 3717 times:

Quoting TeamAmerica (Reply 11):
If you are still together after 5 years and it's boring and she drives you crazy but at the same time you can't imagine life without her...that's love. Get married, have kids, grow old together. That's as good as it gets, and don't torture yourself thinking there's something better out there somewhere.

I do believe with baexecutive she is a he.   Pardon If I'm wrong though.

I can't say I've ever loved somebody. I did get stupidly infatuated with my first girlfriend though, and it didn't end well and as a result I don't see her too often now. She does hold a special place though, for being my first. (Girlfriend, not sex, you dirty perverts  )

I've dated a few people since and I've always compared them to her, which I know is wrong but I couldn't help it. I've been single since Xmas day 2008 (Happy Christmas to you too, bitch...) because I just attract high maintenance people, both male and female so I'm very happy on my own at this stage, considering my last girlfriend lied to me (told me her parents were divorcing and she didn't need the stress which is a total lie as her parents weren't ever married and they still live together), messed me around ("I want a break for a while" and that whole thing) and finally ditched me on Christmas day (after I spent a f*cking fortune on her).

If you're single, stay single. Masturbating and being lonely is far easier to deal with than a relationship  


User currently offlineasuflyer05 From United States of America, joined Feb 2004, 2371 posts, RR: 3
Reply 15, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 16 hours ago) and read 3637 times:

Can you picture life without her?

User currently offlineMudboy From United States of America, joined Jan 2006, 1167 posts, RR: 5
Reply 16, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 3521 times:

Quoting baexecutive (Thread starter):
how do you know you are in love with someone?

When you stop all rational thinking!


User currently offlineDocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 19609 posts, RR: 58
Reply 17, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 3517 times:

I just... know. He's asleep next to me now. It hurts me when he's gone. When I'm hurt, I want him. When I'm happy, I want to be happy with him. When I'm proud of me, I want him to be proud of me. When he's proud of himself, I'm proud of him. Not because I put any effort into it, but just because that's how it is.

I love him. I just do.

That's how you know.


User currently offlineaerorobNZ From Rwanda, joined Feb 2001, 7184 posts, RR: 13
Reply 18, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 12 hours ago) and read 3502 times:

you don't, you just hope like hell you analyzed the chemical reaction you are feeling in your brain correctly . There's always a chance you just got caught up in the ride along the way - but that's the risk you take.

Actions always have consequences. Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't. You can learn to love someone, but like any habitual behaviour it can take a long time to learn. Hence arranged marriages are often more successful than whims based on such airy fairy concepts as love.


User currently offlineTheCol From Canada, joined Jan 2007, 2039 posts, RR: 6
Reply 19, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 9 hours ago) and read 3460 times:

Quoting Phoenix9 (Reply 7):

  

That totally hits the nail on the head.



No matter how random things may appear, there's always a plan.
User currently offlineflymia From United States of America, joined Jun 2001, 7151 posts, RR: 9
Reply 20, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 8 hours ago) and read 3445 times:

Quoting Fly2HMO (Reply 3):
When you feel an incredibly painful, scalding and urgent inner sensation to give a female one of these:

That was great, took 3 whole post too!

As for the real question for me it was when I could not stop thinking about the girl and espcially when I cared for her well being so much that I would ask her to call/text me when she got home every night, when I would worry about her if she went out. I knew I fell in love when I was away from her all I could think about is her. It took 6 months for me to be sure but when you cant stop thinking about someone that is when you really know your in love IMO. Not just physical either just everything about her.



"It was just four of us on the flight deck, trying to do our job" (Captain Al Haynes)
User currently offlineRJ111 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 21, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 7 hours ago) and read 3421 times:

You don't feel ashamed after you've just given her a seeing to.



Seriously.


User currently offlinesw733 From United States of America, joined Feb 2004, 6321 posts, RR: 9
Reply 22, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 5 days 5 hours ago) and read 3371 times:

Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight
gonna grab some afternoon delight.
My motto's always been; when it's right, it's right.
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night.
When everything's a little clearer in the light of day.
And you know the night is always gonna be there any way.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight. Ooooo, Afternoon delight.


User currently offlineLH459 From United States of America, joined Aug 2005, 886 posts, RR: 1
Reply 23, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 4 days 22 hours ago) and read 3272 times:

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 17):
I just... know. He's asleep next to me now. It hurts me when he's gone. When I'm hurt, I want him. When I'm happy, I want to be happy with him. When I'm proud of me, I want him to be proud of me. When he's proud of himself, I'm proud of him. Not because I put any effort into it, but just because that's how it is.

  

Sums everything up quite nicely! I can only speak for myself: My partner and I began our relationship as a mutual infatuation, which rapidly progressed to falling in love. It was different from anything that had come before, and I knew that I was falling for him. Hard. That was 10 years ago this October. To this day, I don't understand the attraction between us. We're quite different, we often disagree, but we're crazy about each other and therefore it all works!



"I object to violence because when it appears to do good, the good is temporary; the evil it does is permanent" - Ghandi
User currently offlinebaexecutive From United Kingdom, joined Jul 2005, 740 posts, RR: 0
Reply 24, posted (4 years 5 months 2 weeks 4 days 22 hours ago) and read 3245 times:

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 17):
I just... know. He's asleep next to me now. It hurts me when he's gone. When I'm hurt, I want him. When I'm happy, I want to be happy with him. When I'm proud of me, I want him to be proud of me. When he's proud of himself, I'm proud of him. Not because I put any effort into it, but just because that's how it is.

I love him. I just do.

That's how you know.

Thats one of the nicest things I've ever seen wrote down.


25 Post contains images oa260 : Yeah +1 , Im not normally into that Sugar,candy stuff but that was touching. Dont think Ive ever been at that stage though, but been near
26 theredbaron : Nowadays a ton of people are divorced heartbroken or depressed because they don know what real love is , therefore they dont even know if they are in
27 Post contains images ClassicLover : So many things show you are in love... there are rather too many to answer Being in love is so unlike anything else though, you should know when you f
28 Post contains images airtrainer : Would be too long to write indeed, but I certainly know I am in love, and she knows as well
29 1stfl94 : I've probably been in love three times in my life, each time I knew, not always at the time that I could see the future with this person and that all
30 Babybus : It's like having flu. You get cloudy in the head, immobilized with deep thoughts and feel weak both mentally and physically. You also feel an irration
31 AGM100 : Its not a silly question .... and timely for me. I have dated 4 women in the last 5 years.... dated defined as staying together at least for a month
32 Post contains images LH459 : Congratulations! I firmly believe there is someone for everyone, but it can be so difficult to find one another.
33 Aaron747 : I have a lover - a lover like no other / She has soul, soul, soul, sweet soul and she taught me how to sing / She shows me colors when there's none to
34 Post contains images Fly2HMO : Awww that was touching.
35 Post contains links and images Dreadnought : THIS is love... http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/north_east/8570398.stm
36 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : Glad I wasn't the only one thinking along the lines of Anchorman. As for "How Do I Know?" - when I didn't really care that back in November I was on
37 Asturias : True love. It is like a dance. It's hard to explain for people who have never felt it, but it does exist. I don't think it's that rare, though it cert
38 Flyingfox27 : I just got back with my college friend after almost 10 years! now thats true love if she rediscovered me via one of my youtube vids, then Facebook the
39 KiwiinOz : Isn't there an old joke for this one? Something to do with gargling?
40 Post contains images FlyDeltaJets87 : I always wanted to charter a Concorde and get married at Mach 2.0+ Don't think that will happen anymore though. When I was living in Florida around a
41 UK_Dispatcher : Yep, that is it. I have avoided meeting anyone for the last few years because I hate setting myself up for that kind of fall and the pain that comes
42 CO 757-300 : I usually fall in love at least once whenever I am drunk. i'm lucky like that.
43 Molykote : I've wanted a 911 since I was 10 years old. When I finally could afford to own and maintain one (at least a good gently used example), it didn't seem
44 kmh1956 : If you have to ask, you're not. You'd know.
45 RobertNL070 : Nicely said. My partner and I are married since last September, but we've been together 13 years tomorrow. I still don't sleep too well on the occasi
46 FlyboyOz : It seems to me that most people don't really understand what love is. I think you need to watch lots of romantic movies so that you could understand w
47 Post contains images pitingres : Determining true love is a two pass algorithm. If you make it through 25 years, you were in love. All joking aside, this probably comes closest. I mig
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