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Things You Don't Want To Hear Your Pilot Say.  
User currently offlineAerLingus From China, joined Mar 2000, 2371 posts, RR: 0
Posted (15 years 6 months 1 week 1 day 10 hours ago) and read 610 times:

1. 'So, the psychiatrist says I'm a narcoleptic! What's that got to do with it!'
2.'Wow! I'm still hung over from last night's bender.'
3.'I think I'm colourblind.'
4.'There's a flock of seagulls on the runway...10 points for each one we can ingest!'
5.'Newark approach: What say we play Simon Says, eh?'
6.'Ladies and gentlemen, as this is a rather long flight, we will be flying into as much thermal turbulence as possible to keep things exciting.'
7.'My God, there's a monster on the wing! Oh, wait. That's just the first officer doing the walkaround.'
8.'La Guardia approach, we're low on fuel and we have zero visibility. I'll betcha twenty bucks I can make this approach!'
9.'Hey! Get off of the runway!'(Bangs on cockpit glass.)
10.'...and so I said, "How was I supposed to know I wasn't supposed to tailgate that DC-10?" '
Now it's your turn.

Get your patchouli stink outta my store!
34 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
User currently offlineXFSUgimpLB41X From United States of America, joined Aug 2000, 4300 posts, RR: 34
Reply 1, posted (15 years 6 months 1 week 1 day 9 hours ago) and read 536 times:

11. Screw checklists! Lets wing it this time and see if we actually remember everything!

Chicks dig winglets.
User currently offlineIainhol From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 2, posted (15 years 6 months 1 week 1 day 9 hours ago) and read 532 times:

True story here. A while ago I was taking a tour of UA ops at LAX, as I know one of there capts. We (The Capt, FO, an intern and I) where walking through the terminal to the airplane, talking about aerobatics. The Capt. was talking about inverted spins, the FO was telling us a story about when one of his students stalled the aircraft at the top of the enimemem and got them in a inverted spin! I can just imagen if any nervous passengers heard us talk about this, thinking they where going to do that in the airliner!

User currently offlineBlink182 From United States of America, joined Oct 1999, 5499 posts, RR: 14
Reply 3, posted (15 years 6 months 1 week 1 day 9 hours ago) and read 527 times:

12.what does this instrument do?
13. oops, I didn't mean to push that!
14.(while on approach) lets race that other plane on approach that is ahead of us to our runway, loser buys lunch!
15.tower, we have a problem
16. cool! lets try that out man!
I will think of more!

Give me a break, I created this username when I was a kid...