JetsGo From United States of America, joined Jul 2003, 3084 posts, RR: 5
Reply 1, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 5 days 6 hours ago) and read 1290 times:
I heard about this on the radio last week and at first I disagreed with this, but in the end, how is it any different from braces or acne medication for example? I'm still so-so on the issue, but I found those, especially braces, to be valid points.
Quoting BAKJet (Thread starter): Also, a bit odd that the mom insisted that the girl had been bullied, but the girl herself said no. What do you think?
This could just be the bully bullying her into saying she isn't being bullied. We'll never know.
rfields5421 From United States of America, joined Jul 2007, 7607 posts, RR: 32
Reply 2, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 5 days 4 hours ago) and read 1253 times:
Based on the photos, the surgery is justified in my opinion.
Yes, I know over time most likely the ears will become less obvious and less visibly standing out in most cases.
My ears were not as severe, and unlike a girl I could not cover them up with my hair.
But I'm within spitting distance of 60, and when I go back to my home town, someone will always mention how my ears looked like wings and used to 'flap around' when we were young.
No one ever understands how hurtful and mean spirited such comments were to a 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 year old child, or how many painful memories such comments bring up now.
I understand now they are not trying to be hurtful, but it still is not a pleasant memory. Quite probably it is one of the reasons I have never for a second regretted leaving that town, and not keeping track of most of the people I went to school with for my first 9 years of school.
DocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 19732 posts, RR: 59
Reply 4, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 5 days 3 hours ago) and read 1203 times:
I'm on a slow connection and can't see the deformity but this is probably congenital absence of the helix. The helix is a bit of cartilage in the ear that forms its shape. If it's absent, the ears stick out like scoops. It's a relatively common abnormality.
Surgery is typically curative, safe, well-tolerated. I was always taught that the kid has to be done growing because it's fixed with a bit of silicone implant to recontour the ear. Also, I was always taught that the kid has to request it because it's not a major deformity.
Major deformities should, of course, be repaired ASAP. Of course, there is a grey zone as to what is "major."
cpd From Australia, joined Jun 2008, 4879 posts, RR: 38
Reply 5, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 4 days 22 hours ago) and read 1151 times:
I don't know if that's major - in some of the video, it doesn't seem bad - though the photo does look a bit worse.
I used to go to school with someone who was a little bit similar to that, he just didn't really care I don't think. I think he knew where he was going, had his life on track and nobody was going to stop him reaching his goals no matter how much they tried.
Some people are a bit more affected by this than others.
Quoting rfields5421 (Reply 2): No one ever understands how hurtful and mean spirited such comments were to a 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 year old child, or how many painful memories such comments bring up now.
Young kids can be vicious to each other, and they think it's a game and fun.
Aesma From France, joined Nov 2009, 6669 posts, RR: 11
Reply 6, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 4 days 15 hours ago) and read 1079 times:
About the examples of orthodontia, acne medication, and contact lenses, I disagree. Orthodontia is done on kids (not that young, mind you) because it needs time and you move teeth etc. so rather do it while things are evolving than after the fact. By the time somebody "needs" it, adolescence, it would be frustrating to only start then. I had braces from 10 to 15 and in the end I was really glad to get rid of them (and of the result). Acne, even mild, can lead to permanent scarring, not something you'd want. It also isn't about 7 yo kids. So, those arguments fall flat.
As for contact lenses for kids, I don't think that's a good idea and justified in any way, so that argument is void too.
Now about the ears, the problem looks to be the mother, it was her idea and she influenced her kid. Even if bullying happened, I don't think surgery was the best way to handle it, rather make some education on the kids, and teach the girl that she shouldn't care about those bullies, she's not deformed ! And she's got the long hair to mostly hide it. I wouldn't be surprised to learn that she'll need a few more surgeries after that first one because she'll grow up and it will mess the modification up.
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jwenting From Netherlands, joined Apr 2001, 10213 posts, RR: 18
Reply 7, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 3 days 18 hours ago) and read 990 times:
Quoting cpd (Reply 5): Young kids can be vicious to each other, and they think it's a game and fun.
And they get pushed to it by parents, older kids, and even teachers... I remember all too well, being constantly bullied as a child for having glasses and being the best of the class in all except sports...
JAGflyer From Canada, joined Aug 2004, 3533 posts, RR: 4
Reply 8, posted (3 years 5 months 1 week 1 day 7 hours ago) and read 880 times:
As much as people say "it's what's on the inside that counts", outer appearance has and will always be very important to the public. What this girl was being bullied for isn't something that I would say is a major/severe facial flaw. Should she have had some sort of facial deformity or irregularity I'd be more sympathetic to her having the surgery as it will definitely pay off later on down the road when she is dating/in the working world (be it front-line or not).
How about concealer/make-up to cover the freckles and putting her hair over the ears to hide the folding/prominence?
[Edited 2011-04-18 13:56:20]
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