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Can We Make This An Acceptable Double Standard!  
User currently offlineStarAC17 From Canada, joined Aug 2003, 3385 posts, RR: 9
Posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 7 hours ago) and read 3151 times:

I think if any double standard is acceptable in today's society it is the older woman hooking up with the younger guy.

I saw this on Huff post and looking at this girl she is pretty hot. Yes I would hit that  . The jist of it is that Betsy Brashear a 24 year old lured a 15 year old into a tanning booth and kissed a 15 year old teen boy and was allegedly seen half naked. Now I know its not a perfect thing to do but it is better than the teachers doing because as far as I know this woman wasn't in any position of authority (a teacher is). Also lets be real that this guy isn't traumatized by this in fact he is high fiving his mates about it right now.

Now if the genders were reversed I do see the problem 100%, however I do see that things are not always equal when it comes to men and women. Domestic violence isn't penalized equally and the rates of it are about equal with women committing about half of it (in the west) but men doing it is the worst thing in the world where women who do it are often praised by others for it. This trend is changing slowly.

I just think that this woman shouldn't face felony charges for this as no one was really hurt here and there was no sex and no emotional damage to anyone. I do have to wonder why this woman has to resort to this when she shouldn't have issues with men. She might be crazy and no sane guy wants a relationship with her but she can get the physical satisfaction from the opposite sex I would assume.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/0...en_n_1628441.html?utm_hp_ref=crime

Thoughts??


Engineers Rule The World!!!!!
44 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineQFA380 From Australia, joined Jul 2005, 2081 posts, RR: 1
Reply 1, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 7 hours ago) and read 3142 times:

Quoting StarAC17 (Thread starter):
Now if the genders were reversed I do see the problem 100%

She should face charges. There should be no institutionalised bias for or against either gender in the law. If it is illegal for a man it should be illegal for a woman. Whether you agree with the law or not shouldn't be dependant on the gender of the perpetrator.

I'm also sure that if a 15 year old girl kissed a hot 24 year old male she would most likely be getting the female equivalent of a high five from her buddies too (that is, raging jealousy).

Hopefully she will get put on the sex offender registry, and forced to notify her neighbours that she is a convicted child sex offender.

If it was a man everyone would be screaming pedophile saying he should be castrated but it's a woman so its fine...  


User currently offlineseb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11718 posts, RR: 15
Reply 2, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 6 hours ago) and read 3085 times:

Quoting StarAC17 (Thread starter):
24 year old lured a 15 year old into a tanning booth

So, you want adults to be able to have sex with children? Really? I mean, REALLY?? That is messed up. Yes, I was 15 once too and, yes, I had crushes on adults. It happens. We all do. But, a 15 year old can not comprehend the future. Especially a boy. All they think about is their hormones. I would say no.

Second topic: Men really need to stand up and scream that it is never ever okay for a woman to be the abuser. We all need to stand behind men that are abused by their wives and tell society that this is never acceptable. Abuse by men is not acceptable and abuse by women is not acceptable. Ever.



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineRara From Germany, joined Jan 2007, 2111 posts, RR: 2
Reply 3, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 6 hours ago) and read 3077 times:

No sympathy from me. Kids aren't sex objects, neither from men nor from women.

Quoting StarAC17 (Thread starter):
no one was really hurt here and there was no sex and no emotional damage to anyone.

That's a VERY dangerous road to go down. How many cases of attempted rape and sexual harrassment have been covered up with these exact words?



Samson was a biblical tough guy, but his dad Samsonite was even more of a hard case.
User currently offlineNewark727 From United States of America, joined Dec 2009, 1366 posts, RR: 0
Reply 4, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 4 hours ago) and read 3017 times:

I'm 21 now, and even with a small level of distance from being age 15 I can tell you 100% certain that when I was 15, I was a MORON. I don't know what I would do, rationally or irrationally, at that age in that situation. Certainly I wouldn't be employing the entire capacity of my judgment.

User currently offlineDocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 19924 posts, RR: 59
Reply 5, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 4 hours ago) and read 3008 times:

Quoting Newark727 (Reply 4):

I'm 21 now, and even with a small level of distance from being age 15 I can tell you 100% certain that when I was 15, I was a MORON.

  

And now watch how the next ten years are going to change you. You ain't seen nothing yet!


User currently offlineDeltaMD90 From United States of America, joined Apr 2008, 7931 posts, RR: 52
Reply 6, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 4 hours ago) and read 2977 times:

I know I should join yall's opinions on the double standard and all but...

why couldn't this have happened to me when I was 15!?   



Ironically I have never flown a Delta MD-90 :)
User currently offlineEasternSon From United States of America, joined Jun 2006, 668 posts, RR: 1
Reply 7, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 2 hours ago) and read 2925 times:

I know a kid who had an affair with an almost 30yr old woman, starting when he was just 15.

It's a long story, with many twists and turns, but they got married, then divorced.

He was arrested last year for having sex with a 14 year old girl. He was 34.

Being taken advantage of at 15 twisted his brain badly enough to make him think there was nothing wrong with having sex with a 14 year old girl.

As cool of a story as it might be to brag about in sophmore gym class, it'll screw you up badly down the road.



"The only people for me are the mad ones...." Jack Kerouac
User currently offlineStarAC17 From Canada, joined Aug 2003, 3385 posts, RR: 9
Reply 8, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 10 hours ago) and read 2759 times:

Quoting seb146 (Reply 2):
So, you want adults to be able to have sex with children? Really? I mean, REALLY?? That is messed up. Yes, I was 15 once too and, yes, I had crushes on adults.

No I'm not encouraging this behaviour but I feel that this isn't a criminal act unless it can be proven that there was emotional damage done. We have experts that should be able to determine this.

Quoting seb146 (Reply 2):
Second topic: Men really need to stand up and scream that it is never ever okay for a woman to be the abuser.

Here is the problem, men can do anything as them reporting it usually gets a laugh from the police and they can't hit back. This need to be fixed but I'm not sure how to do it.

Quoting Rara (Reply 3):
That's a VERY dangerous road to go down. How many cases of attempted rape and sexual harrassment have been covered up with these exact words?

I think it should be taken on a case by case basis, there are incidents out there that an 18 year old gets the same level of punishment for having sex with their 17 year old partner. There should be a psychological evaluation of the parties involved to see if any actual damage was done and if yes pay a huge penalty for your action, if not it should be less.

In this case the luring should be the biggest issue I think over the act itself. It often not the sex itself that is damaging its the emotional control that is present or not if that is determined to be something that is lacking then I do feel the offence is lesser.

Quoting DeltaMD90 (Reply 6):
why couldn't this have happened to me when I was 15!?  

I was trying to make this thread a little funnier than it came out to kind of incite that point. I do see the side of the people who want the book thrown at this woman.



Engineers Rule The World!!!!!
User currently offlineltbewr From United States of America, joined Jan 2004, 13138 posts, RR: 15
Reply 9, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 9 hours ago) and read 2749 times:

In the USA, we have a very twisted attitude as to sex. Far too much we encourage teen men to have sex to prove your an adult, prove your a 'real man', to be popular with your peers, ignoring the responsibilities that sex has including STD's, the emotional affects and creating a child. We really need to discourage teen sex by both males and females, adults should have sex if they choose with those of at least of legal age and understanding the risks and not just the good feelings sex gives. Some state by the way don't look at a 18 y.o having sex with a 17 y.o as statutory rape, but a 21 y.o. with a 17 or less it is. The teen should 'say no' knowing it is morally questionable and may be legally wrong.

Yes an adult having sex with a minor should carry the same penalties no matter the adult's gender. Indeed we need to change our attitudes and sentencing laws to recognize the huge harm such behaviors cause and should be seen as sexual assault.


User currently onlinetravelavnut From Netherlands, joined May 2010, 1625 posts, RR: 7
Reply 10, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 9 hours ago) and read 2743 times:

Quoting Newark727 (Reply 4):
I can tell you 100% certain that when I was 15, I was a MORON.

Having sex with a hot woman is never a stupid idea  
Quoting DeltaMD90 (Reply 6):
why couldn't this have happened to me when I was 15!?

This.



Live From Amsterdam!
User currently offlineStarAC17 From Canada, joined Aug 2003, 3385 posts, RR: 9
Reply 11, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 9 hours ago) and read 2733 times:

Quoting ltbewr (Reply 9):
Far too much we encourage teen men to have sex to prove your an adult, prove your a 'real man', to be popular with your peers, ignoring the responsibilities that sex has including STD's, the emotional affects and creating a child.

This isn't just the US its everywhere, its peer pressure and immaturity and its been going on for centuries. I think only with maturity someone realizes that sex isn't a race.

Quoting ltbewr (Reply 9):
We really need to discourage teen sex by both males and females, adults should have sex if they choose with those of at least of legal age and understanding the risks and not just the good feelings sex gives. Some state by the way don't look at a 18 y.o having sex with a 17 y.o as statutory rape, but a 21 y.o. with a 17 or less it is. The teen should 'say no' knowing it is morally questionable and may be legally wrong.

Discouraging teen sex doesn't work there are too many natural instincts that overpower it. The rates of teens having sex have hardly changed, we are just as horny as ever. In fact the age teens are losing their virginities is getting later IIRC. However not being open and having the discussion with teenagers about safe sex and the emotional issues that they are dealing with. Sex ed. is really important and if you look at the stats from US states the ones that lead in teen pregnancies and STI's are the ones that have poor sex ed or even discourage it.



Engineers Rule The World!!!!!
User currently offlineseb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11718 posts, RR: 15
Reply 12, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 7 hours ago) and read 2700 times:

Quoting StarAC17 (Reply 8):
I feel that this isn't a criminal act unless it can be proven that there was emotional damage done.
Quoting StarAC17 (Reply 8):
We have experts that should be able to determine this.

There are numerous studies that prove there is emotional damage done when an adult has sex with a teen. It has been determined. Studies all over the place. It is quite easy to google it.

Quoting StarAC17 (Reply 8):
them reporting it usually gets a laugh from the police and they can't hit back. This need to be fixed but I'm not sure how to do it.

The way to do it is to stand with the man. Not just on an internet forum, but in real life. Let him know he is doing the right thing at it is not to be laughed at and he is more of a man for standing up for himself.

Quoting ltbewr (Reply 9):
we encourage teen men to have sex to prove your an adult, prove your a 'real man', to be popular with your peers,

What really gets me is: men are encouraged to have sex with as many as possible and that is percieved as a good thing, but if a woman does the exact same thing, she is not to be touched. I never got that.



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineIMissPiedmont From United States of America, joined May 2001, 6305 posts, RR: 33
Reply 13, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 6 hours ago) and read 2674 times:

Quoting StarAC17 (Thread starter):
Now if the genders were reversed I do see the problem 100%,

You are serious? The 15 year old girl is just as likely as the 15 year old boy to be "high fiving" her mates. Neither is able to make a good decision.



Damn, this website is getting worse daily.
User currently offlinemham001 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 3681 posts, RR: 3
Reply 14, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 6 hours ago) and read 2662 times:

What if it were a 24 year old man doing the molesting?

User currently offlineRara From Germany, joined Jan 2007, 2111 posts, RR: 2
Reply 15, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 6 hours ago) and read 2662 times:

Quoting DeltaMD90 (Reply 6):
why couldn't this have happened to me when I was 15!?   
Quoting travelavnut (Reply 10):
Having sex with a hot woman is never a stupid idea  

If you two have no issue with a 15 year old girl having sex with a 24 year old "hot man", then alright.



Samson was a biblical tough guy, but his dad Samsonite was even more of a hard case.
User currently offlineseb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11718 posts, RR: 15
Reply 16, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 2643 times:

Quoting seb146 (Reply 12):
Quoting StarAC17 (Reply 8):I feel that this isn't a criminal act unless it can be proven that there was emotional damage done. Quoting StarAC17 (Reply 8):We have experts that should be able to determine this.
There are numerous studies that prove there is emotional damage done when an adult has sex with a teen. It has been determined. Studies all over the place. It is quite easy to google it.

And, look at Jerry Sandusky. No damage done there, right? Look at Catholic priests. No damage done there, right?



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineDeltaMD90 From United States of America, joined Apr 2008, 7931 posts, RR: 52
Reply 17, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 2 hours ago) and read 2605 times:

Quoting Rara (Reply 15):
If you two have no issue with a 15 year old girl having sex with a 24 year old "hot man", then alright.

I do, I was just joking. Quite "awesome" for the 15 year old at the time (maybe) but it can and often does lead to bad consequences. The woman should be punished as harshly as the guy, but I doubt that would happen.

On a side note, what do yall think is the appropriate age for consent? It's different here from state to state. Does age gap matter? How about a 15 and 16 year old? A 15 and 24 year old? A 17 and 24 year old? 18 and 50 year old?



Ironically I have never flown a Delta MD-90 :)
User currently offlineslider From United States of America, joined Feb 2004, 6854 posts, RR: 34
Reply 18, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 2 hours ago) and read 2593 times:

To paraphrase the late George Carlin, I'm tired of these boys being called "victims". Let's call them what they are: "lucky bastards."


But seriously, there is and has been a double standard and it's BS.


User currently offlineDocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 19924 posts, RR: 59
Reply 19, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 1 hour ago) and read 2571 times:

Quoting Rara (Reply 15):
If you two have no issue with a 15 year old girl having sex with a 24 year old "hot man", then alright.

There is one little issue. For a man (be he 15 or 95) to have sex, he HAS to be willing. Otherwise, the flesh ain't up to the task.

I'm not saying it should be legal, but it's hard to call it "rape."


User currently offlineDesertJets From United States of America, joined Feb 2000, 7784 posts, RR: 16
Reply 20, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 1 hour ago) and read 2560 times:

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 19):
There is one little issue. For a man (be he 15 or 95) to have sex, he HAS to be willing. Otherwise, the flesh ain't up to the task.

I remember being 15 and I remember it not taking much to become aroused. A errant breeze could get a 15 year old under the influence of his little brain, you gotta wonder what an attractive but crazy 24 year old half naked would do.



Stop drop and roll will not save you in hell. --- seen on a church marque in rural Virginia
User currently offlineDocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 19924 posts, RR: 59
Reply 21, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 23 hours ago) and read 2540 times:

Quoting DesertJets (Reply 20):
A errant breeze could get a 15 year old under the influence of his little brain, you gotta wonder what an attractive but crazy 24 year old half naked would do.

I don't have to wonder. We all know the answer.


User currently offlinetugger From United States of America, joined Apr 2006, 5670 posts, RR: 10
Reply 22, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 23 hours ago) and read 2520 times:

I think the biggest issue I have with this type of stuff is the fact that often people end up in "sexual predator" lists for the rest of their lives for something that they are likely to never do again or had minimal affect on the underage person (I am not saying it does not affect nor that the effect might be harmful).

To me, these people are not the dangerous people that you need to really focus on and utilize societies resources on. While it is not desirable, I would say that someone needs to demonstrate a inclination to do this again (say they are caught a second time) or that what was done has to be much worse (forced, a lot time "grooming" the person to be open to the act, etc) before you get put on sex offender roles.

The restrictions upon a sexual predators life are severe and for good reason and we need to make sure that those restrictions can be effective and maintained and that means not filling up places for these people to live with idiots like this woman or the guy that drunkenly peed on a school fence. And we need to allow our law enforcement resources to focus on the real, demonstrated, bad people.

Did this woman deserve to be arrested and tried and have a criminal record? Yes. Does she need to be placed on the sexual predators list with all its incumbent restrictions if this is her only act? In my opinion, No.

Tugg



I don’t know that I am unafraid to be myself, but it is hard to be somebody else. -W. Shatner
User currently offlineRara From Germany, joined Jan 2007, 2111 posts, RR: 2
Reply 23, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 21 hours ago) and read 2490 times:

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 19):
There is one little issue. For a man (be he 15 or 95) to have sex, he HAS to be willing. Otherwise, the flesh ain't up to the task.

I'm not saying it should be legal, but it's hard to call it "rape."

Hmm, I think the contemporary definition of rape is a bit wider than just forcible penetration against someone's will. Abuse of a position of authority, or coercion, are probably also included. The term has changed quite a bit over time, as sexual violence has become less acceptable. For instance, only some decades ago, rape within marriage was by definition impossible. Rather unbelievable from today's point of view. On the other hand, if you read e.g. some feminist blogs and suchlike, they throw the word rape around like there's no tomorrow...

Anyway, I see your point about physical necessities, but in such an extreme situation, bodies can react quite unpredictably. For instance, apparently a lot of women who are raped experience orgasms during rape against their will, which later only adds to the shame and feeling of humiliation. So it may be possible for a woman to rape a man, even though it sounds unlikely from a "normality" point of view.



Samson was a biblical tough guy, but his dad Samsonite was even more of a hard case.
User currently offlineStarAC17 From Canada, joined Aug 2003, 3385 posts, RR: 9
Reply 24, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 21 hours ago) and read 2478 times:

Quoting seb146 (Reply 16):
And, look at Jerry Sandusky. No damage done there, right? Look at Catholic priests. No damage done there, right?

That was actual sexual assault and I am by no means promoting that.

But actual Rape and Statutory rape are not the same crime IMO and making someone labelled a sexual offender for life for having sex with someone that could be a year younger (18 year old and a 17 year old) is not really a criminal offence and should be a misdemeanour. It can be charged criminally but should be done so after being investigated. IE a teacher using sex to blackmail a student should be charged criminally.

[Edited 2012-06-29 18:11:23]


Engineers Rule The World!!!!!
User currently offlinegemuser From Australia, joined Nov 2003, 5711 posts, RR: 6
Reply 25, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 12 hours ago) and read 2436 times:

Quoting StarAC17 (Thread starter):
I just think that this woman shouldn't face felony charges for this as no one was really hurt here and there was no sex and no emotional damage to anyone.

StarAC17, from your OP, what charges could she face in Australia? She kissed him? Really? This is a problem? He saw her half naked? Whatever that means, you can go to any Australian beach and see half naked people, and completely naked people at many of them, both officially and unofficially (especially outside the cities and busy tourist beaches).

As well at 15 he is approaching the age of consent(16), OK not quite there, but close. I am really puzzled over what all the fuss is about.

Gemuser



DC23468910;B72172273373G73873H74374475275376377L77W;A319 320321332333343;BAe146;C402;DHC6;F27;L188;MD80MD85
User currently offlineAirstud From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 2685 posts, RR: 3
Reply 26, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 11 hours ago) and read 2420 times:

Quoting gemuser (Reply 25):
As well at 15 he is approaching the age of consent(16), OK not quite there, but close. I am really puzzled over what all the fuss is about.

Well for one thing in the U.S. the age of consent is 18, see.



Pancakes are delicious.
User currently offlineDeltaMD90 From United States of America, joined Apr 2008, 7931 posts, RR: 52
Reply 27, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 7 hours ago) and read 2367 times:

Quoting Airstud (Reply 26):
Well for one thing in the U.S. the age of consent is 18, see.

Not in every state... it's 16 in many states, some with close age requirements and some without them



Ironically I have never flown a Delta MD-90 :)
User currently offlineseb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 11718 posts, RR: 15
Reply 28, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 6 hours ago) and read 2346 times:

Quoting StarAC17 (Reply 24):
making someone labelled a sexual offender for life for having sex with someone that could be a year younger (18 year old and a 17 year old) is not really a criminal offence and should be a misdemeanour.

If a 17 year old has relations with an 18 or 19 year old, I see no problem with that. If they had been dating for some time, there really is no problem. However, 24 year old and 15 year old is a problem to me.

As far as I know, the age of consent is 18 in the United States. DeltaMD90 pointed out it is lower in some states. But, to be safe, I think we all go with 18. I don't think a lot of us knew the age of consent is lower in Australia. I think it is 17 in Canada, but I am not sure. Even still, I think of 15 as still a child and having sex with a 24 year old is bad, IMO. Simply looking is kinda creepy, but not bad.



Life in the wall is a drag.
User currently offlineDeltaMD90 From United States of America, joined Apr 2008, 7931 posts, RR: 52
Reply 29, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 6 hours ago) and read 2340 times:

This may help:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_North_America



Ironically I have never flown a Delta MD-90 :)
User currently offlineAesma From France, joined Nov 2009, 6722 posts, RR: 12
Reply 30, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 2297 times:

I don't think the double standard is acceptable. I think the age of consent should be lowered.

At 15 you can be a kid, but you can also be an adult. By the way, it doesn't seem to bother many in the US to put 15 year olds on death row, isn't that a massive double standard ?

If someone is a kid at 15, then (s)he should have parents that educate them accordingly, just like when you tell young children not to accept gifts from strangers, not to follow them, etc. I was dating a girl aged 15 when I was 18 and our relationship was not strange or gross or whatever (and legal, in my country). We were very much on the same page, and I've never found someone with which the intellectual connection was so strong since, of any age.

Her parents disapproved of the relationship, however, and she caved in to them, no need for a law. A friend of ours, aged 15 too, was dating a man twice my age in the meantime, but the parents of that girl were more open (both the parents of the girls and mine were friends at the time, that's how I met them), probably because they lived and enjoyed May 68 in its fullest, like my father (French sexual revolution, after the general strike).

And yes, you can make mistakes at 15 that you may regret later, but it shouldn't be the end of the world, we're not living at a time when a girl couldn't get married if she was not a virgin. In the end a lot of guilt comes from a repressed society, I feel.



New Technology is the name we give to stuff that doesn't work yet. Douglas Adams
User currently offlinegemuser From Australia, joined Nov 2003, 5711 posts, RR: 6
Reply 31, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 19 hours ago) and read 2214 times:

Quoting Airstud (Reply 26):

Well for one thing in the U.S. the age of consent is 18, see.

OK, I missed that, I assumed, wrongly he was quoting an Oz article. But even so 16 is still the age of consent in OK.

But still kissing is a "lewd act"???

Gemuser



DC23468910;B72172273373G73873H74374475275376377L77W;A319 320321332333343;BAe146;C402;DHC6;F27;L188;MD80MD85
User currently offlinemham001 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 3681 posts, RR: 3
Reply 32, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 4 hours ago) and read 2137 times:

Quoting Aesma (Reply 30):
At 15 you can be a kid, but you can also be an adult.

A 15 year old "adult" is certainly the exception. So we should sacrifice the majority who are not mature for the sake a very few? Let the pedophiles loose on them?

Quoting Aesma (Reply 30):
By the way, it doesn't seem to bother many in the US to put 15 year olds on death row, isn't that a massive double standard ?

Source for that please.

I'll save you the bother. It's not true.


User currently offlinemham001 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 3681 posts, RR: 3
Reply 33, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 4 hours ago) and read 2134 times:

Quoting DocLightning (Reply 19):
There is one little issue. For a man (be he 15 or 95) to have sex, he HAS to be willing. Otherwise, the flesh ain't up to the task.

So by that argument, as commonly happens, if a woman is wet during a rape, it's not rape?


User currently onlinekiwirob From New Zealand, joined Jun 2005, 7550 posts, RR: 4
Reply 34, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 hours ago) and read 2112 times:

As a former 15 year old boy I would have been all over her, when I was 15, heck if I wasn't married I'd do her now. The kid must be a bit weird for not jumping her, or his mum had issues with it, because if my 15 year old came home and said dad I'm banging a 24 year old I'd give him a high 5.

http://bestprisonbooksmovies.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/betsy-brashear-photos.jpg


User currently offlineAesma From France, joined Nov 2009, 6722 posts, RR: 12
Reply 35, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 hours ago) and read 2089 times:

Quoting mham001 (Reply 32):
A 15 year old "adult" is certainly the exception.

By adult I mean able to make such decisions, if you wish. Of course there is no comparison to someone being 40, but then again it's exactly the same if you compare someone being 18 and the same 40 years old.

Quoting mham001 (Reply 32):
Let the pedophiles loose on them?

That doesn't mean anything. Am I a pedophile by your standard ? What fundamentally changes from one year to the next ?



New Technology is the name we give to stuff that doesn't work yet. Douglas Adams
User currently offlinemham001 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 3681 posts, RR: 3
Reply 36, posted (2 years 3 months 3 weeks ago) and read 2056 times:

Quoting Aesma (Reply 35):
That doesn't mean anything. Am I a pedophile by your standard ? What fundamentally changes from one year to the next ?

I consider the men who molested me at that age to be pedophiles.


User currently offlinemham001 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 3681 posts, RR: 3
Reply 37, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 23 hours ago) and read 2042 times:

Quoting kiwirob (Reply 34):
if my 15 year old came home and said dad I'm banging a 24 year old I'd give him a high 5.

What would your reaction be if he told you a 24 year old (man) was banging him?


User currently offlineRara From Germany, joined Jan 2007, 2111 posts, RR: 2
Reply 38, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 23 hours ago) and read 2038 times:

Quoting kiwirob (Reply 34):
15 year old came home and said dad I'm banging a 24 year old I'd give him a high 5.

Also your 15 year old daughter?



Samson was a biblical tough guy, but his dad Samsonite was even more of a hard case.
User currently offlineDeltaMD90 From United States of America, joined Apr 2008, 7931 posts, RR: 52
Reply 39, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 20 hours ago) and read 2012 times:

Quoting mham001 (Reply 36):
Quoting Aesma (Reply 35):
That doesn't mean anything. Am I a pedophile by your standard ? What fundamentally changes from one year to the next ?

I consider the men who molested me at that age to be pedophiles.

Awkward.......

But you bring up a good point, 2 15 year olds doing it is a lot different than a 15 and 40 year old, no? Maybe the best system is a progressive age of consent with multiple levels of close age exemptions and rules?



Ironically I have never flown a Delta MD-90 :)
User currently offlineRara From Germany, joined Jan 2007, 2111 posts, RR: 2
Reply 40, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 14 hours ago) and read 1958 times:

Quoting DeltaMD90 (Reply 39):
Maybe the best system is a progressive age of consent with multiple levels of close age exemptions and rules?

Standard rule of creepiness: don't date under half your age plus seven.  



Samson was a biblical tough guy, but his dad Samsonite was even more of a hard case.
User currently onlinekiwirob From New Zealand, joined Jun 2005, 7550 posts, RR: 4
Reply 41, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 10 hours ago) and read 1914 times:

Quoting Rara (Reply 38):
Also your 15 year old daughter?

The legal age here is 16, I don't see a lot of difference between 15 and 16, but hopefully when she is 15 will be sensible enough to make the right decision.

I had sex for the first time at 15, she was 14, so I'm not one to talk, I kept on seeing her until I was 17, had I been born in the US I could have been labled a sex offender for life, nuts.


User currently offlineSuperfly From Thailand, joined May 2000, 39905 posts, RR: 75
Reply 42, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 7 hours ago) and read 1879 times:

Quoting mham001 (Reply 36):
I consider the men who molested me at that age to be pedophiles.



As terrible as what happened to you was, those men were not pedophiles. They were Ephebophiles.
Ephebophilia is an attraction to teenager/late adolescence/early adulthood. I know the law doesn't make this distinction but the clinical term is Ephebophilia.
Pedophile is mental disorder where an adult has an attraction for pre-pubescent adolescnce - under age 10 / little kids.

Quoting mham001 (Reply 32):
Quoting Aesma (Reply 30):
By the way, it doesn't seem to bother many in the US to put 15 year olds on death row, isn't that a massive double standard ?

Source for that please.

I'll save you the bother. It's not true.



What Aesma is saying was true at one time. The youngest person given the death penalty was George Stinney who was executed by electric chair in 1944 in South Carolina. He was only 14 years old.
In 2005, the US Supreme Court ruled against juvenile death sentences.



Bring back the Concorde
User currently offlinemham001 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 3681 posts, RR: 3
Reply 43, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days 1 hour ago) and read 1820 times:

Quoting DeltaMD90 (Reply 39):
Awkward.......

Yes, it's quite the party conversation piece.

Quoting kiwirob (Reply 41):
I had sex for the first time at 15, she was 14, so I'm not one to talk, I kept on seeing her until I was 17, had I been born in the US I could have been labled a sex offender for life, nuts.

While you hear of an exception occasionally, state laws and the courts usually take age difference into account.

Quoting Superfly (Reply 42):
As terrible as what happened to you was, those men were not pedophiles. They were Ephebophiles.
Ephebophilia is an attraction to teenager/late adolescence/early adulthood. I know the law doesn't make this distinction but the clinical term is Ephebophilia.
Pedophile is mental disorder where an adult has an attraction for pre-pubescent adolescnce - under age 10 / little kids.

I am well aware of the difference. At least one of those men would have done whatever he could get hold of. Pedophile.

Quoting Superfly (Reply 42):
In 2005, the US Supreme Court ruled against juvenile death sentences.

There hasn't been a juvenile execution since 1964. The 2005 Supremes said no executions for offenses committed as a juvenile.

Notable is the stone silence from the teenager-adult sex crowd when the element of gay men is introduced.


User currently offlineAesma From France, joined Nov 2009, 6722 posts, RR: 12
Reply 44, posted (2 years 3 months 2 weeks 6 days ago) and read 1799 times:

Quoting mham001 (Reply 36):
I consider the men who molested me at that age to be pedophiles.

Just to be clear, what do you mean by molested ? Don't want any details but are you saying molested because with time gone by you think now that you were not able to make the decisions you made then, or are you talking about an actual assault, in which case it has nothing to do with what we're discussing ?

As teens we lack experience, but how are we to get that experience, exactly ? Before the girl I talked about there was another one, this time it was my parents that advised me against the relationship (and not because of her age since she was 15 and me 16), but I didn't listen. Well, they were right, she wrecked me big time, sleeping with every guy saying her hello. With hindsight I would have never approached her, but I don't regret it, because that's how you learn, she made me who I am, in a way. And if she had been 25 or 35, well, it wouldn't have changed anything, really, and I would have listened to my parents even less !



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