zippyjet From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 4724 posts, RR: 13 Posted (7 months 3 weeks 4 days 11 hours ago) and read 2607 times:
I use a lot of slang, sometimes far from "PC". I also make up nick names for people. What are some of the slang you use on a regular basis. Please share. Here are some of mine. My late dad used to say I descended to "barnyard humor."
A lot of these are "toilet centric" so you've been warned.
Drop "B.C." or anyone elses kids to the pool: Number 2
Lay a Loaf: Number 2
A new one I just heard: Take the Browns to the Superbowl! (same as above)
zippyjet From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 4724 posts, RR: 13 Reply 6, posted (7 months 3 weeks 4 days 5 hours ago) and read 2449 times:
Some more of mine:
"Tuniferous" Of or pertaining to Tuna. (you can run with this one)
"Schtup" pronounced Schtoup=Fornication
"Whippin the Skippy"-Self gratification
"Bite the pillow and take your screwing"- Take your punishment and bite.
"Ugly Cute" so ugly they are actually cute
fxramper From United States of America, joined Dec 2005, 7029 posts, RR: 93 Reply 9, posted (7 months 3 weeks 3 days 15 hours ago) and read 2368 times:
paperbag her - don't wanna see her face during sex
Quoting seb146 (Reply 7): Do we really need to know when and where we #2? Most people can smell it. Or hear it. Not something I want to see, hear, or think about. If you need to go, then go. Don't announce it.
my colleagues text daily poop pics thus poop of the day.
LFutia From Netherlands, joined Dec 2002, 3195 posts, RR: 31 Reply 15, posted (7 months 3 weeks 3 days 9 hours ago) and read 2241 times:
I have a bad habit of announcing all my toilet moves and personally i dont care because we all do it. I honestly think tomorrow with all the food eaten, im gonna have to shit like 5 times... just sayin
Leo/ORD -- Groetjes uit de VS! -- Heeft u laatst nog met KLM gevlogen?
Some more of mine: "Prostitot": A young usually underage girl who dresses with less to show off what God blessed her with.
"CFM" (Feet, Shoes, or outfit)--- For the hottie women feet-very high arches dancer feet, shoes, high heels or shoes that show toe cleavage, outfits, use one's imagination. These all give that aura to come f*ck me.
"Tempo Ling" My personal descriptor for a hot Asian woman. The name just came up within my vivid imagination.
"Celebrity Table": Extra passenger screeing area for passengers.
"Graze, Chewing Cud" Eating
"Matress Sale Weekend" My adjective for those pointless Monday holidays where government workers get a paid day off courtesy of we the taxpayer...President's Day, Columbus Day etc.
"Punk Rock Fit" Same as having kittens but a lot of screaming and yelling and cursing.
"Ploppies" Turds (Got this one from Randy on My Name Is Earl) usually dealing with doggy or kitty turds.
"Buckwheat and Alfalfa Sprouts" Usually the scant food the hottie models and trendy nature people eat and embrace.
"Log Rolling" Another term for laying a loaf.
As mentioned Prairie Doggin the poo is ready to pop out///same as turtle poking it's head out.
EA CO AS From United States of America, joined Nov 2001, 12564 posts, RR: 64 Reply 18, posted (7 months 3 weeks 3 days 8 hours ago) and read 2202 times:
Quoting zippyjet (Reply 17): "Celebrity Table": Extra passenger screeing area for passengers.
Airport wise, I go with the "Airport Olympics" for the act of unpacking/undressing, repacking and redressing required at security, followed closely by the "TSA Macarena" for the position you have to assume in the Rapiscan machine.
"In this present crisis, government is not the solution to our problem - government IS the problem." - Ronald Reagan
I like both of those. When I started with FL ten years ago before the TSA did the screening at BWI, we at the ticket counter had to rummage through the selected baggage. I'll never forget it, we had an ancient rickety rotted wood table that on occasion would collapse when we had a hernia bag. This was perpendicular to our ticket counter and everyone could take in the festivities/entertainment. The selected's were celebrities hence "Celebrity Table."
"Uminner" for UMNR Unaccompanied minor. When I was in training I saw this abbreviation and asked: "What in the heck is a Uminner?
"Weeper" Usually a comely female passenger who is distressed (missed flight) just learned her obese 27 pound Chihuahua or Tabby Cat is to fat to travel in the cabin under the seat and is crying us a river. Sometimes the weepers are worse than the hell raising passengers "having a litter of kittens."
"Did an Anna Nicole" Referring to when an object such as a computer, phone or other piece of technology is inoperable, out of order, no power. Many times, I've substituted Anna for other celebrities who have croaked (excuse me) passed away.
"Dollar Store Having a Sale" When we run out of staples, paper, other office stuff or when some of our technology does an "Anna Nicole." We've run out of boarding pass paper again! When will we get more? Usually a new crew member asks. My answer (humor) When the dollar store has it's next sale, is when we will get additional/new supplies!
"Curse of February/February's Revenge" Sometimes the shortest month of the year is the most challenging and seems to last the longest. Many times Murphy and his famous law can be applied to this second month of the year. It also has the BS holidays of Valentines Day and Mattress Sale Weekend (President's Day). Also there are a lot of vapid awards shows on TV.
"Flare Up" Hemorrhoid attack. An especially wicked rho-id offensive I call a Flare Up to beat the band
"Screw The Pooch" A major screw up. I use this term interchangeably with Cluster Fu*k.
"In Like Flint" All systems go, everything is OK/Cool.
"Short Bus,""Chimes" Mentally Challenged the R-Word, Stupid. "Chimes" is a corporation in Maryland that assists those with special needs and they have the cleaning contract at BWI. There are several within this group that ride that short bus in style. Our inside joke= Just a friendly reminder: A hot dog is not a Chihuahua in the Microwave!
Also my cat is a "short bus kitty" Touched, off her rocker, anything but normal.
DocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 16840 posts, RR: 57 Reply 23, posted (7 months 3 weeks 2 days 16 hours ago) and read 2071 times:
Quoting seb146 (Reply 7):
Do we really need to know when and where we #2? Most people can smell it. Or hear it. Not something I want to see, hear, or think about. If you need to go, then go. Don't announce it.
YOU!!!! You are way too mature. Please get off A.net.
fxramper From United States of America, joined Dec 2005, 7029 posts, RR: 93 Reply 24, posted (7 months 3 weeks 2 days 12 hours ago) and read 2033 times:
Would you hit it got watered down to would you and that eventually turned into "Y"? So when I'd be out with my college buds and a hot girl would be next to us at the bar or in line somewhere, you need not be discrete or quiet, just ask Y?
You got me beat, I'm usually a tripple play man. (3 Loafs deposited in the bowl!)
Upper Decker Lay a loaf in the tank of the toilet instead of the usual deposit in the bowl. (I came close to an Upper Deck deposit years back when I worked at a fancy hotel as a "luggage professional." Part of the job entailed courtesy shoe shines for guests that wanted their footwear gussied up. One semi regular obnoxious guest from Boston would put out four pair of his clodhoppers with no tip, not even a thank you. But instead of my "double decker" I gave his precious shoes a "golden shine."
Government Worker: Slow, Attitude, Efficiency Forgive me if I'm lumping government workers into one group. But 20 % make life miserable and ruin the reputation and good will of the hard working decent 80%.
When I use this slang (my own invention) This pertains to slow computers, phone systems, elevators. The attitude being do the minimum required and act like you are sacrificing your life and that of your children and pets in the process.
In regard to efficiency: Take what could easily be done in five minutes and make it an hour long production.
Oscar Madison: A total slob Felix Unger: Anal retentive neat freak/fanatic Both these characters the leads in the Odd Couple
Hippo: Person of size and I include myself !
Hi Hon!: Baltimorean standard greeting. Usually from folks who are natives such as myself and have a Baltimore Accent so thick you could cut it with a fork. The older women usually have Bee Hive Hairdos, and cat eye glasses.
Peepers: Eye glasses Magoo: Blind or visually challenged Helen Keller: A combination of visual, hearing and vocal impairment.
At work many times I'll inform my co-workers we have a Magoo, or Helen Keller/HK on board. F*ck Political Correctness. Agingpeacock: Someone who is getting older but is still vain and young at heart. I count myself as an "Agingpeacock." One time someone who I had not seen in 20 years saw me preening in a public bathroom mirror. We were in a play together years back and he said I'm an "Agingpeacock" Still vain as ever.
Quoting zippyjet (Reply 17): "Punk Rock Fit" Same as having kittens but a lot of screaming and yelling and cursing.
I alwyas liked using the term "Going Prompt Critical" for that one.
Quoting DocLightning (Reply 20): Anyone ever use: "Gotta go see a man about a dog" when going to poo?
Horse. Dog is for peeing. But yes, all the time.
Quoting zippyjet (Reply 26): The older women usually have Bee Hive Hairdos, and cat eye glasses.
Baltimore. It's like if they made a city out of Gary Larson cartoons...
Caught myself finishing a bottle of Miller at a stall last week (can anything make one feel more retarded than drinking while you already have to go?) I thought to myself, "this must be what a B-2 feels like under a KC-10", and an analogy was born.... Aerial Refueling!
Posting without Talent is simply Tolerated Vandalism... We are the Vandals.
zippyjet From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 4724 posts, RR: 13 Reply 30, posted (7 months 3 weeks 1 day 6 hours ago) and read 1900 times:
Quoting Darksnowynight (Reply 27): Caught myself finishing a bottle of Miller at a stall last week (can anything make one feel more retarded than drinking while you already have to go?) I thought to myself, "this must be what a B-2 feels like under a KC-10", and an analogy was born.... Aerial Refueling!
Been there done that. But, I'm wacky as is.
Logic Free Zone: The State of Maryland. We know how to screw the pooch royally and big time:
Baltimore City: Our clueless Mayor has a bee up her wide bonnet (keyster) for having this Grand Pr ix race on Labor Day Weekend. It causes nothing but traffic hassles for us and bleeds money worse than meat at the butcher shop. Meanwhile, our infrastructure is falling apart, you get road construction during rush hour and our murder rate is starting to take off again like a Boeing Jet. The cool Police Commish retired but was really forced out and under his watch we had some of our lowest murder numbers.
State Highway Administration: Speed and red light cameras work like Rolex watches and snap you at will. When one gets vandalized it's a Dragnet for the perp. Meanwhile we have endless road construction projects that take forever. Our traffic road signs sometimes work. When they are lit they have stupid messages or Silver, Bronze or Cobalt alerts.
When I was in Florida (Tampa and Miami areas a few weeks ago) they had plentiful traffic alert signs with distance between two exits, average speed and driving time. A cool idea. Good luck in our state.
When it comes to a business friendly atmosphere we are ranked in the Bottom five states. We have a lot of big government regulation and bureaucracy.
zippyjet From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 4724 posts, RR: 13 Reply 32, posted (7 months 2 weeks 3 days 6 hours ago) and read 1672 times:
When the old pervy Carvel guy was doing commercials back in the 70's and 80's if I had a ferocious dump I'd call it Fudgy the Whale! BTW ever notice how all the Carvel Ice Cream cakes were made in the same mold that was shaped like an old school incandescent light bulb?
YVRLTN From Canada, joined Oct 2006, 2097 posts, RR: 0 Reply 33, posted (7 months 2 weeks 3 days 6 hours ago) and read 1669 times:
Quoting zippyjet (Reply 26): You got me beat, I'm usually a tripple play man. (3 Loafs deposited in the bowl!)
This is usually the average achievement for the day, but a few weeks back - and last week of our vacation - I got a stomach bug and was doing over 6 a day and they were not loafs at all - it was ass piss!! Since then, I have never felt happier doing one nice big solid table leg in the morning...
By the way, ass piss really sucks on a road trip using public facilities. There are cleaners in some random public bogs & bars in Northumberland, Yorkshire, Lincolnshire & Norfolk I genuinely feel sorry for...
When I was in London, the boys used to have a competition. Various results
"Aaaahh, that was just like Stonehenge"
"Go check out the pretty tiger stripes!"
I did get the all time winner, an email from the VP to all the boys "Will the last person who took a dump please go and visit a doctor immediately - medical leave is unconditionally granted"
Now in our office, we are all different nationalities, so we actually have a pooping world cup. Each country is timed and the fastest gets to top of the group table. During the olympics, we deviated to gold, silver & bronze medals.