steffenbn From Denmark, joined Apr 2010, 263 posts, RR: 0 Posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 13 hours ago) and read 5287 times:
Hey all.
What are the risks of having kids?
I was drunk and had intercourse with a girl - by accident I forgot to "Pull out". She then said "Now you are going to be a father". What are the percentage of getting a girl pregnant? I will and shall not have kids!
Am I doomed? Is there some hope for me that she didn't get pregnant?
I'm teryfied of the thoughts about being a dad! I'm only 22 and not ready for the role of a parent!
Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Reply 1, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 12 hours ago) and read 5270 times:
Hi Steffen!
Well some couples try their whole lives to have kids and never do, while others have sex once and the woman is pregnant. So while your girl yesterday might not be 100% confirmed pregnant now, the outcome is so live changing that you don't want to rely on any statistical odds. This might be the end of life as you know it, so you have to act NOW, as every minute and hour counts.
Doctors can prescribe a "morning-after pill" and you absolutely HAVE to get your girl to get this. Sounds easy if she's on the same page with you (i.e. doesn't want to become a mother yet) but I can see there are situations when she doesn't want to cooperate. Reasons include:
1) She's religious and doesn't want to interfere with God giving her a kid,
2) she's older (or ugly) and realizes that this might be the last chance for her to have a kid,
3) she is a bitch and tries to have a kid with you paying lots of money during the next 18 years.
So anyway, act now, call her, talk to her.
Before the end of today, you will have to go to the doctor, clinic or hospital with her. If you don't manage to do this, your life might be totally messed up after today (or maybe it might be the best thing that ever happened to you, but honestly, probably not).
Good luck man.
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Reply 3, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 12 hours ago) and read 5240 times:
Hey Steffen,
Quoting steffenbn (Reply 2): morning-after pill is out of the question!
...is actually the one and only solution here, as annoying as it might seem. You'll have to invest a lot of energy into this now, your next 6 hours should involve nothing else but trying to track down that girl and talk to her. It might seem impossible now, but if your chance is slim then that's better than regretting this for the rest of your life. Does she have your number? Maybe she wants to talk to you but doesn't know how to contact you?
From my experience, Danish people are very reasonable and have a good common sense. Talk to her and you'll see she'll be different than yesterday night.
But most importantly, DO SOMETHING! These next hours might shape the rest of your life. Don't just hope she's not pregnant. Even if you block it out now and hope for the best, one day she'll knock on your door and then you'll pay for years and years to come. And even worse, you'll know you have a son or daughter but she might not even let you see the kid. She might have a different man to act as the kid's father, but the money comes from you.
So I'll say it one more time, go out there, track her down, talk to her. This is the only sensible thing now. The day has to end with you taking her to the hospital. That is the only, ONLY, and I repeat only way you'll be able to continue your life the way you want it to be.
Again, good luck.
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
If you're absolutely freaked out about even remote chance of kids then you should be utilising more advanced contraception than pull out. Oh and I don't know any 19 year olds who freely engage in sex who are indifferent towards having kids except the trailer trash I guses.
Does she know your name/phone number/where you live/circle of friends? If not don't worry about it and continue living life.
Answering the question though, probability could be close to zero or quite high. The creators' grand trick on men who don't want kids is to make women more likely to have sex (particularly drunken one night stands) when shel is at her most fertile. If she's not in those few days the chances are pretty low. Thus how the lay came about could give you some indication, ie prior interest in you, whether she threw herself at you or put up any token resistance etc.
Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Reply 5, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 11 hours ago) and read 5205 times:
Steffen I wouldn't pay attention to what QFA380 writes. Look at the age group on QFA380's profile. This one in particular:
Quoting QFA380 (Reply 4): Does she know your name/phone number/where you live/circle of friends? If not don't worry about it and continue living life.
This is the most stupid thing you can do. There are all kinds of ways to find out a kid's father, at least in our developed countries. You'll get into trouble some day. The problem is that during the years before she comes for your money, you won't have a peaceful night as you'll be worried every minute.
So don't let other people fool you into thinking you're off the hook. You're not. Act now, talk to people. Talk to your friends, your parents. Maybe not your drinking buddies from yesterday night. And most important, track her down. And do it now.
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
steffenbn From Denmark, joined Apr 2010, 263 posts, RR: 0 Reply 7, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 6 hours ago) and read 5118 times:
This is no Troll or Joke - This is serious, Thanks for the advice Soren!
Quoting Birdwatching (Reply 5): Act now, talk to people. Talk to your friends, your parents. Maybe not your drinking buddies from yesterday night. And most important, track her down. And do it now.
I'll talk to her tommorrow - would do it now, but my hangovers are killing me!
AF1624 From France, joined Jul 2006, 572 posts, RR: 0 Reply 8, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 6 hours ago) and read 5107 times:
Wow, not sure if trolling or just really crazy.
BUT, I have to say, I don't know how the law is in Denmark but here I would simply be able to NOT be a parent to that child, as the law in France gives responsibility to the woman over her own body but this does include taking the responsibility of raising a child alone if she decides to have a child with a person whom will definitely NOT recognise the child as being his *son* (the child is his biological son but all ties can be ended there).
Now, you should probably talk to her and get her to take the pill. If she doesn't, at 19, there's a good chance she'll be pregnant (as women that age are particularly fertile) - but it's also not 100%.
RussianJet From Kazakhstan, joined Jul 2007, 6276 posts, RR: 23 Reply 9, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 6 hours ago) and read 5106 times:
Quoting steffenbn (Reply 7): This is no Troll or Joke - This is serious, Thanks for the advice Soren!
Quoting steffenbn (Thread starter): I was drunk and had intercourse with a girl - by accident I forgot to "Pull out"
Well, if you're serious then there's one thing here you need to know, which you already should at 22 but here goes anyway - 'pulling out' is not contraception, and won't protect you from disease. If you're going to go out, get drunk and sleep with randomn women, TAKE CONDOMS - and use them.
Birdwatching From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 3573 posts, RR: 52 Reply 10, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 6 hours ago) and read 5082 times:
Quoting steffenbn (Reply 7): I'll talk to her tommorrow - would do it now, but my hangovers are killing me!
Are you kidding? It's the "morning after" pill, not the "maybe some time later next week" pill!
So getting over your hangover is more important to you than your future, her future and your child's future? Sorry I have to say this, but you're incredibly incredible naive for waiting the whole day today and not acting, hoping things sort themselves out. Back when you started this thread and I posted the first reply, there were still some serious chances for a happy ending. Now that you waited the whole day without tracking her down and taking her to the doctor, you're almost 100% screwed. And this is because you feel too hung over right now? Seriously??
That morning after pill, the chances of success sink by the hour. But you just sit there and wait until tomorrow because of your headache or whatever.
I'm speechless.
Soren
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
The guy claims to be 22 and thinks that 'pulling out' is a proper means of contraception - I really wouldn't be that shocked that his hangover takes priority over potentially life-changing situations.
DeltaMD90 From United States of America, joined Apr 2008, 5297 posts, RR: 47 Reply 20, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 4 hours ago) and read 4970 times:
DocLightning From United States of America, joined Nov 2005, 16814 posts, RR: 57 Reply 22, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 4 hours ago) and read 4966 times:
Quoting steffenbn (Thread starter): I was drunk and had intercourse with a girl - by accident I forgot to "Pull out". She then said "Now you are going to be a father". What are the percentage of getting a girl pregnant? I will and shall not have kids!
I'm sorry, but did nobody ever have a talk with you?
You are using the withdrawal method. If you do that, you have a risk of about 30% of being a father at the end of any given year of sexual activity.
If you use condoms, the risk drops to about 5%.
If you insist she be on contraception, the risk drops below 1%.
Guess the next two weeks or so will be nerve-wracking. Next time, wrap it.
AirPacific747 From Denmark, joined May 2008, 2091 posts, RR: 23 Reply 23, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 4 hours ago) and read 4964 times:
I hate to admit it but I did the same stupid mistake last year with a woman much older than me. (She was 37, I was 24 but she was pretty damn hot)
Quoting Birdwatching (Reply 1): 2) she's older (or ugly) and realizes that this might be the last chance for her to have a kid,
Exactly that was her reasoning for not wanting to do something to prevent getting pregnant. She refused to get an abortion after we had been together if she would have become pregnant, and before we were together, she said she was on the pill which turned out to be a lie. Anyway I could only blame myself for being so stupid. Luckily she didn't get pregnant. Will never act that stupidly again.
Mir From United States of America, joined Jan 2004, 19699 posts, RR: 56 Reply 24, posted (5 months 1 week 6 days 4 hours ago) and read 4945 times:
Quoting DocLightning (Reply 22): I'm sorry, but did nobody ever have a talk with you?
Actually, I took care of that.
Signed,
-Mir
7 billion, one nation, imagination...it's a beautiful day
25 DeltaMD90: But on a serious note guys, we all know: A: Pull out method is a poor method and has a high failure rate B: He did not utilize the pull out method I f
26 JBirdAV8r: This. Food for thought: All those people you see that get "accidentally pregnant"--do you think those people just didn't bother "pulling out," and th
27 DocLightning: Technically he did because he did intend to use it. And it failed. Hence the high failure rate. She's sick in the head. And it's a common sickness, u
28 AirPacific747: Indeed she is. Her lie and desperation to get pregnant could change not only her life forever but also mine against my will. But as I said, the luck
29 DeltaMD90: But isn't failing at failing succeeding??
30 AF1624: Ahah, this is one of these awesome threads. OP, any news ?! I'll go get some popcorn.
31 dc9northwest: I have a better idea: Don't touch a girl next time. I'm straight... but one good thing about gay sex is: zero risk of pregnancy
33 tugger: Well you know Doc many, many guys get their real "sex education" from situations like Steffen's, as another example see (emphasis added by me): And w
34 vikkyvik: I doubt we'll be hearing from the OP anymore (at least in this thread), but this did crack me up: I'm guessing this whole episode (if it was real) st
36 bristolflyer: I was just about to post a serious reply when I saw the comment about the hangover. That makes me think that this thread is a joke. Have you thought a
38 DeltaMD90: My thoughts exactly. Either that or he doesn't care enough to take any serious advice. Either way, thanks for the laugh and hope she's not pregnant!
39 flymia: I feel like this is a joke too. Especially when thinking about a hang over or how attractive she is, is part of the conversation. If not a joke why th
40 DarkSnowyNight: ?????????? Shouldn't that statistic be measured by incident rather than time interval? I mean, I can't just compile 1996 (224,976,328 incidents; fast
41 Revelation: I love posts like this. The horse is out of the barn, so closing the gate does no good now, but I suppose pointing out his mistakes makes you feel be
42 Aaron747: Not to be crass, but might be a better idea to give her a pearl necklace next time instead of going all the way. Just a suggestion :P
43 Ken777: Actually she might be giving you a hard time. On the pill, but things it's a good idea to give guys who don't use a condom a hard time. Or she's alrea
44 Cerecl: First, let this be a lesson to you. Exercise some discretion with regard to binge drinking, sexual encounter and safe sex practice. Having said that,
45 aerorobnz: Go and get her drunk again tonight and spike her drink with the "jesus" pill...(the saviour of your life.. ) Or if she likes drinking and drugs say th
46 TheCol: Wow, I think Anet just sunk to a new low. LMAO, these made my night.
47 StarAC17: I'll think this is nonsense but I'll bite as well. Pulling out is not effective because sperm can still enter the vagina even if it has been done succ
48 StarAC17: This actually hits close to home, dated a woman of that age and she really didn't want me to use condoms at all. She went on the pill and I didn't tr
49 TSS: Indeed. An excellent rule of thumb to follow is "If you're going out to drink, don't pick anyone up. If you're going out to pick someone up, don't dr
50 steffenbn: Wow - this thread really got out of hand! It was started as a serious thread and it turned out to become a magnet for trollers here on A.net! Well, ye
51 Mir: I assume that Facebook is the only means of getting hold of her that you have? Because you should really be trying other avenues if they exist. Also,
52 AR385: Well, yeah. That does not really work. I´m not a chick magnet, but it´s not like when I go out I have a goal of picking anyone up. often, it´s the
53 QFA380: WHO found it can is reasonably effective up to 5 days. To prevent pregnancy 'the pill' prevents the zygote from being embedded in the lining of the u
54 Birdwatching: Yes that's what might be the case. Steffen, you have to keep tracking her down, and find out if it was serious or if she was pulling a really bad pra
55 Bongodog1964: This is the point where I decided to join the "this is a windup" brigade. Surely even the youngsters of today wouldn't ask "have I got you pregnant"
56 AF1624: I'm pretty sure they would, actually. Even more so if it's the only way to communicate with the other person! Could the OP share more about the type
57 AirPacific747: All I learned from this is that you can never trust a woman who says that she is on the pills, because they often have a secret agenda. Important les
58 SmittyOne: Indeed. The General is inescapably responsible for the troops under his command.
59 ANITIX87: Do you really not understand why? Let's review! 1) Got drunk, had sex, no protection or contraception. 2) TERRIFIED OF PREGNANCY (funny enough, not s
60 AF1624: That's a bit over the top, though, in my opinion (and, respectfully, in my opinion only). I've been dating girls on the pill for about seven years (3
61 ANITIX87: Oh, it absolutely is over the top, I agree! My girlfriend is on a birth control patch which, as you said, helps regulates her cycle and prevents preg
62 vikkyvik: That's fine, but even the pill is not 100% effective. Either he made this all up for kicks, he's really clueless, or he just doesn't care.
63 StarAC17: In my experience and the experience of people I know you pick up when you are not trying. Women can sense desperation from a mile away and when you a
64 bjorn14: Hmm...as Rodney Dangerfield said "I never went to bed with an ugly woman, but I sure have woken up with a few" Beer Goggles? My guess is that she's j
65 n229nw: If you aren't mature enough to deal with the consequences of sex and with the fact that there is another human being involved (not just a vagina), may
66 KiwiRob: You do realise you can still knock them up even if you do pull out before spraying her boobies. Best bet is to just bang them up the back door on one
67 DocLightning: The trouble with this argument is that the decision to abstain also requires maturity. Also, he's 24-25. If you've ever been a man that age, you must
68 moose135: Doesn't that apply to men of just about any age... :D[Edited 2012-12-10 12:29:23]
69 DocLightning: Generally, before age 12 or so they think with their brains.
70 StarAC17: I think that Doc will attest to what I'm going to say. You won't stop people immature or mature from having sex ever! It's instinctual. Also this goe
71 Gatorman96: If you are able to get her in your car, drive backwards for the exact amount of time its been right before you pulled out. This will not only save you
72 n229nw: I've been a man at that age and other ages. And it's sadly always true...I guess that is why women are superior to us. But that's definitely a good p
73 Maverick623: 'sup. Too numerous to mention... though I will point out, that even though people say it's "18 years of (insert witty comment here)", the truth is th
74 DeltaMD90: I was thinking the same thing when I was at work today (sad that this thread came to mind, I know.) steffenbn, be more responsible! You have a life-c
75 Geezer: steffenbn; I have only had time to read a few replies, but I must tell you this..........NEVER have sex while you're drinking ! If you just want to dr
76 RussianJet: Ah yes, 'COPS' - the one, true yardstick by which all American society should be judged!
77 StarAC17: I agree with this, I can never enjoy sex nearly as much as when I am sober. Your mind tricks you to think it will be better but it isn't. To make a f
78 Geezer: I'm surprised that no one who has ever been in the military hasn't mentioned this yet, but when I went through boot camp, (and again every time our sh
79 Aesma: I hope this will be true one day but it is certainly not true today, although our law and way of life is less black and white on this than in the ang
80 AF1624: It REALLY does come down on the individual cases though. You're citing a very high profile case but, for a 22 year-old with little or no income, NO c
81 sturmovik: I've always regretted that I signed up for a.net long after the epic threads (flairport, the lube thread etc) were done and dusted, but this thread ha
82 AF1624: Please do tell us new guys all about this thread. I've heard about Flairport but not the lube thread!
83 Rara: We need more updates by the thread starter!
84 SmittyOne: Sounds like you're blaming the spread of STDs on girls...my knowledge of sex may be limited but are not two people still required?
85 Birdwatching: Dear Steffen, I'd be very curious to know how the story unfolded. Have you had a chance to talk to the girl, and what was her reaction? I do hope she
89 CanadianDC10: This is the most ignorant post I've ever read on the internet. And why not just research it online instead of posting it for so many to see as if you'
90 Doona: If this is the most ignorant post you've ever read on the internet, you haven't spent enough time on this forum, let alone the internet. Cheers Mats
91 WildcatYXU: I guess this is a good thing. It only means that she has a life!
92 RussianJet: That was truly an entertaining read!
94 sturmovik: Indeed. She oughta read the comments section under any random youtube video. Steffen's post would look like a peer reviewed theoretical physics paper
95 Deltal1011man: and all my pitty for you went away. You gotta be kidding me......smh lol pretty much the same here. I really want to post a smart ass comment, but...
97 steffenbn: As soon as I get some news I'll post them! -steffen
98 B747forever: So you still do not now what happened?
99 KiwiRob: I hope you knocked her up, I'll piss my pants laughing!!!!!
100 mikeology: Since discovering this thread about an hour ago i've laughed quite well. My coworkers must think i'm nuts. I guess i'll be the first to ask. Since you
101 klm672: So we will find out in about 9 months, then? Yes, a picture would be helpful
102 PlymSpotter: Oh boy, what a thread! Afraid not - that really happens, often as a fall out from the dating process, which has been neatly simplified to 'here's a pi
103 mikeology: Truer words have neve been spoken Exactly. Plenty of friends of mine have met girls on Facebook just to maybe go on a date and "hook up" Facebook is
104 DocLightning: What if they had sex on a treadmill?
110 DocLightning: I was waiting for it... Thank you for not disappointing.
111 L-188: Well next time remember to either keep it in your pants or wrap up willie. Let this be a lesson to you Second thingbtonremember, your not doomed until
112 klm672: No problem! I made use of it in my own post because I knew better asking such questions here on a.net. Update?
113 3DoorsDown: I was surprised to see the starter of this thread is 21-25. I would have guessed 9-12. If your knowledge of sex and what happens during and after is t
114 mirrodie: Seriously, guy? If you are serious, she doesn't sound too concerned. MOOOSE!!!! You totally beat me to that. My first thought upon reading the first
115 type-rated: If you are going to play, be prepared to pay! Use a birth control device. I can't tell you how many guys have lived messed up lives because they had a
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Too true - Soren, you're a legend.....
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