Cerulean From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR: Posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1154 times:
LHMark get's the credit for inspring this topic, what with that fruitcake getting passed around for several years.
So. With that in mind, what is the absolute worst "gift" you've ever been given for Christmas, your birthday, or whatever?
Here are my Top 3:
1. A Video cassette of Russian Air Military Power. Not bad in and of itself, but the people that gave it to me (wrapped in festive paper, and ribbon and all) could've at least wound the tape to the beginning first to at least give the impression that it wasn't a used tape. It ended up going in the trash can as soon as I got home. This one, not surprisingly, was given to me by the In-Laws.
2. An economy sized bottle of Windex glass cleaner. Maybe someone was trying to tell me something?
3. A huge, 2 foot tall aluminum Budweiser beer can. I figured it would've been filled with thre types of popcorn, or at least a drinkable beer. It contained absolutely NOTHING.
Lindy From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR: Reply 3, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 23 hours ago) and read 1139 times:
Set of envelopes from China. It was for X-mass 4 years ago in my office. Everybody bought something. I've got those freaking envelopes. I would preffer candy bar over this crap.
AA61hvy From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 13975 posts, RR: 59 Reply 4, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 21 hours ago) and read 1117 times:
I got a big eraser.. it was like 7 inches big, and said "Dayton" on it......
CMK10 From United States of America, joined Feb 2004, 513 posts, RR: 4 Reply 5, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 20 hours ago) and read 1107 times:
A Garbage bag. My rather senile grandmother (who fakes strokes for attention) sent me one of those orange plastic garbage bags you put leaves in for my 14th birthday. I will never forgive her.
DC-10's Forever
"Traveling light is the only way to fly" - Eric Clapton
Glenn From United Kingdom, joined Oct 2005, 0 posts, RR: 0 Reply 7, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 19 hours ago) and read 1091 times:
that would have to be the smallest jar of Pesto I have ever seen. Compounded by the fact that I didn't even know what it was and also I suspect it came from the Fridge or Cupboard when I turned up
Redngold From United States of America, joined Mar 2000, 6907 posts, RR: 51 Reply 8, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 19 hours ago) and read 1087 times:
My secret Santa gave me a "bendable Santa" when I was in eleventh grade in high school (for those of you who don't know, secret Santa is when you exchange names with people via anonymous lottery, and then you send each other gifts and try to guess who is your secret Santa.)
By that time I knew who it was, and perhaps the bendable Santa wasn't as bad as what I did to it. See, it had a piece of aluminum wire or something in it, and the rest was plastic, so you were supposed to be able to move the arms, legs, and body around and leave it in various positions.
Well, in physics class, I looked right at the person I thought was my secret Santa, who wasn't ever very nice to me anyway, and I 1) tied the legs in a knot, 2) twisted the arms behind its back, and 3) bent it back and forth until the metal thing inside snapped.
Sushka From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 4784 posts, RR: 16 Reply 10, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 13 hours ago) and read 1051 times:
One year I got three puzzles the type that have like 3000 peices.
I didnt even open any of them
Aviatsiya From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR: Reply 11, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 13 hours ago) and read 1059 times:
Well this thread reminds me of the song I posted in the "Funny Songs" thread called "Hey Santa Claus" by Kevin 'Bloody' Wilson, which is about (supposedly) his kids opening their xmas presents.
Hey Santa Claus you c***
where's me f***ing bike?
I've unwrapped all this other junk
and there's nothing that I like.
I wrote you a f***ing letter
and I come to see you twice.
You worn out geriatric fart
you forgot me f***ing bike!
If I'd wanted a pair of bloody thongs
I would've bloody asked
and this cowboy suit and ping pong set
you can shove right up your arse.
You stuffed up me bloody order up
it's enough to make you spew!
But it's just not me who's snakey
me sister's dirty too........
Hey Santa Claus you c***
where's me f***ing pram
you promised you'd send me one
you remember who I am
cos I'm the little girl
who made sit right on your hand.
I'll give you f***ing Ho! Ho! Ho!
you forgot me f***ing pram.
Next time I come to see ya
I'm gonna punch ya in the guts
and i'll let ya f***ing reindeer loose
and kick Rudolph in the nuts
You just wait till next year
when you get back to that store
and me and me little sister
come stomping thru the door
and we'll say "Yeah you wait for it"
Hey Mums and Dads just smell his breathe
and check his blood shot eyes
and don't listen to him boys and girls
cos he tells f***ing lies
He's just a pisstank and a pervert
and he's not even very bright
cos the old f***ing wanker
forgot me f***ing bike
Also, it is now official. Mums and grandmothers are the worst gift givers
N766UA From United States of America, joined Jul 1999, 7991 posts, RR: 27 Reply 14, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 5 hours ago) and read 1014 times:
A bottle of shoe-dob. Don't know what it is? You don't want to.
AviationMaster From Switzerland, joined Oct 1999, 2464 posts, RR: 38 Reply 15, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 5 hours ago) and read 1007 times:
A knitted pullover from grandma (I wasn't the only one who got one though). Never put it on and don't know where it is know (or maybe I don't want to).
Hartsfieldboy From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 552 posts, RR: 1 Reply 16, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 3 hours ago) and read 1001 times:
There is this lady my family knows that ALWAYS gave shit she probably found in her house somewhere. They always went straight into the garbage. My "favorites":
-Soap on a rope
-A pack of Loony Tunes Valentine cards, the funniest part is that it was AUGUST and I was 16 or 17 years old
-A coupon for feminine products, does she realize I'm a guy?
Sccutler From United States of America, joined Jan 2000, 5091 posts, RR: 28 Reply 17, posted (10 years 5 months 3 weeks 2 hours ago) and read 997 times:
My mom gave me a leather visor once (can you say, "Village People"?).
I know it was suggested by her designers at the flower shop, who could not comprehend how anyone could not be gay.
She even said, as I opened it, "I know you're not going to like this."
But, looking at the bright side, it has been a source of amusement in the twenty or so years since.
...three miles from BRONS, clear for the ILS one five approach...
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(I wasn't the only one who got one though). Never put it on and don't know where it is know (or maybe I don't want to).
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