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When Stuff You Teach Your Kid Backfires  
User currently offlineTechRep From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Posted (11 years 1 month 6 days 10 hours ago) and read 938 times:

Well I used to be heavy into martial arts and loved those "soft arts" where one could overcome a much stronger opponent. One night I was teaching my wife some cool moves she could use to bring down a large attacker. My son was very interested in this and we had many sessions, where I taught him about 12 moves using Grappling, Kuk Sool Won and some Kenpo.

It seems my 7 year old was taking some serious notes because he was assaulted at school by a 10 year old. The 10 year old hit my son in the jaw and I always told my son don't cry but defend yourself.

He came back at the larger boy and feinted being hurt more than he really was. He walked up to the larger boy and *cough* head butted him in the nose knocking him out. My little boy.....

Well I must say I was proud inside but I had to refrain from showing any great appreciation for this action. I did teach him this, how should I approach this situation? Now the school is getting shitty and I told them to stick it. He was assaulted by a much larger boy after all.

When I talked to my son he told me very calmly, "Daddy I don't use these powers to hurt people I just wanted to defend myself like you said". This is his second fight, the last fight, he got a kid in a choke hold till he gave up. That boy kicked him in the balls. I Need some advise from other dads. Is it wrong to be proud of this inside? Have I created a monster? I try to avoid fighting at all costs and tried to teach him the same. Was I wrong to teach him combat fighting techniques, Kuk Sool Won and Kenpo to him so young?


TechRep


4 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineVictech From United States of America, joined Jun 2000, 546 posts, RR: 2
Reply 1, posted (11 years 1 month 6 days 10 hours ago) and read 918 times:

I'm not a dad, but I was in your son's shoes, so I think I'm somewhat qualified to weigh in.

I don't think you've done wrong at all...I learned Chito-ryu Karate starting when I was 6 years old and let about 5 kids "have it" before I got out of middle school--all 5 incidents were precipitated by the other party, and I never "picked a fight." My parents always taught me: "Don't ever start it, but don't ever be afraid to finish it." I think what you're teaching your son is good--giving him tools to defend himself is probably the best thing you can do for a child...just make sure that he knows the difference between fighting and self-defense (and he seems to know that distinction well).


User currently offlineAmerican757 From United States of America, joined Mar 2001, 475 posts, RR: 0
Reply 2, posted (11 years 1 month 6 days 9 hours ago) and read 894 times:

when i was little, the neighbor boy thought he was bad and crap and punched me, and I ran and told my dad, he said to punch him back, and I was like "i can" and i ran off and beat the crap outta him.

User currently offlineLubcha132 From United States of America, joined Feb 2001, 2776 posts, RR: 7
Reply 3, posted (11 years 1 month 6 days 8 hours ago) and read 884 times:

well as long as he knows not to start with anyone and as long as he puts his knowledge to use, its ok i guess.

User currently offlineJcxp15 From United States of America, joined Jun 2001, 997 posts, RR: 5
Reply 4, posted (11 years 1 month 6 days 7 hours ago) and read 853 times:

Karate and all is ok, but you gotta watch out cause once the guys pulls out a gat it's over...

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