Matt D From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 9502 posts, RR: 45
Reply 3, posted (14 years 4 weeks 21 hours ago) and read 1911 times:
After much careful thought....ok...maybe 10 seconds of thought, I arrived at the conclusion that the most hideous film I've seen was "American Pie". I can think of no movie before or since that has plummeted so such comedic lows. A movie that objectifies women as fresh bakery products? Someone in Hollywood made the statement that inserting your two fingers into a womans private parts is a feeling akin to warm apple pie-as this film asserts-and someone said "Great...let's make a movie revolving around that statement! If this doesn't prove conclusively that Hollywood is dead out of any original ideas, I don't know what does. I don't care what proof anyone can offer me, I'm convinced that this movie was made without a script. Taking into account the premise of this bomb, where would a script be needed? I'm sure that once filming commenced, the producers said "ah-just make it up as you go along". And the loose, disjointed lack of a story line shows. And what was that with the entire movie being hinged on one thirty second spot where a teenager "gets personal" with said bakery products? As vapid as this movie was, I was amazed that a cherry pie wasn't the key object. At least most people know the sexual connotation associated with cherries. I honestly don't know which was worse-seeing this abomination on the big screen or listening to the people in the (sold out) theater laughing hysterically. Nobody that thinks this movie is funny deserves to live. A quick trip into the afterlife for them would serve a dual purpose in the sense that 1. you are doing them a favor by putting them out of their mental misery, and 2. they would have absolutely nothing positive to contribute to society. All prints of this movie should be burned.
This is the kind of movie that after viewing, one wishes 1. How they managed to allow the theater to sodomize them to the tune of $8 to see it, and 2. Why didn't you spend the night doing something more productive-like sitting at home inserting your fingers into a blender?
Pty From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 11, posted (14 years 4 weeks 17 hours ago) and read 1864 times:
While deadheading back to base, Autumn In New York with Richard Gere and Winona Ryder flickered on the overhead video monitor. I was trapped. 30,000 feet up in the air with no place to go and the bathrooms stank, so I could not hide in there. People were laughing and wincing during scenes of this film that I'm sure the screen writer meant to be romantic or sad. This movie sucks beyond imagination! I've seen some "chick flicks" that I managed to get through unscathed, but this was the mother of them all. I thought of storming the cockpit so as to corkscrew the airplane into the ground! Such was the agony! I love Ryder, but this is the worse she has ever agreed to take on. Must have been the $$.
Crjmech From United States of America, joined Jun 2000, 260 posts, RR: 1
Reply 13, posted (14 years 4 weeks 17 hours ago) and read 1860 times:
Being a dyed-in-the-wool Trekkie, I would have to say Star Trek V: The Final Frontier sucked ass. If you've seen it, I think you will agree. If you haven't seen it, avoid it at all costs. It was written and directed by ol' Bill Shatner himself and well, he writes and directs pretty much like he acts- except worse.
My non-Trek pick is Battlefield Earth. I wish MST3K were still around so that they could lampoon this piece of trash. Only they could make this thing watchable.
Thou shalt mind thine altitude,lest the ground reach up and smite thee.
RyeFly From United States of America, joined Jun 2000, 1396 posts, RR: 0
Reply 16, posted (14 years 4 weeks 16 hours ago) and read 1854 times:
I love movies so I guess thats why I see well over 150 of them in the theater a year. I guess it doesn't hurt I live next door to a 15 screen theater. What I miss I catch on DVD eventually. After seeing so many movies, I still catch some terrible movies everyonce in a while. Here are some recent movies to avoid...
1. Battlefield Earth
2. Blair Witch 2
3. Wing Commander
5. Ready To Rumble
6. Lost in Space
7. The Big Kahuna
8. Here on Earth
9. Hanging Up
The most over-rated movie of all time? Pulp Fiction.
Johnboy From United States of America, joined Aug 1999, 2607 posts, RR: 7
Reply 20, posted (14 years 3 weeks 6 days 19 hours ago) and read 1816 times:
"The Blue Lagoon" with Brooke Shields and Christopher Atkins (who?). Most memorable moment: Brooke gets her first "period." No cotton fields here honey, better make due with the banana leaves! Survivor, it ain't.
"Glen or Glenda" by the immortal Ed Woods (also director of "Plan 9 from Outer Space"). I feel as though I should love this one. But then again, I paid for the DVD. Yes, there were some camp moments (who wouldn't tingle at that electric moment when Delores grudgingly hands her angora sweater to Ed?), but for the most part it was excruciatingly painful. There's nothing worse that a whiny transvestite out to prove a point. With five o' clock shadow, no less. On his back.
"As Good as it Gets". Helen Hunt (!) "wanting" Jack Nicholson? Greg Kinnear as a mincing, prancing, lisping queen? How many stereotypes can a character have? Even Richard Simmons is a butch leather stud compared to him. Skeet Ulrich should have finished him off. And the little dog too!