Avt007 From Canada, joined Jul 2000, 2132 posts, RR: 4 Posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 4 days 4 hours ago) and read 1769 times:
Recently I reached a milestone, a defining point, a watershed event in the onward growth of myself as a man.
Did I get married? No.
Did I graduate from university? No.
Did I lose my virginity? No. (Not last week anyway)
No, I reached that day that every father dreams of from the moment his son is born: I TAUGHT HIM HOW TO USE THE LAWN MOWER!
Woohoo! I felt like dancing through the streets. Oh happy day! Hang in there, guys, your day will come. I'm off to crack a beer in celebration.
Ilyushin96M From United States of America, joined Sep 1999, 2609 posts, RR: 11
Reply 2, posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 4 days 4 hours ago) and read 1739 times:
I remember when my dad taught me to use the lawn mower. It was the old-fashioned push type, and rusty to boot. That POS was the most difficult tool to use - stubborn and didn't cut the grass right on the first pass, so it always took two mowings to get it right. After coaching me a couple of times, my dad left me to it, and I began to hone my gardening skills.
My dad surely had a celebration the day he passed the lawn-mowing chore onto me.
IHadAPheo From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 6028 posts, RR: 53
Reply 6, posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 4 days 4 hours ago) and read 1717 times:
Ah yes but.... just remember soon he will be making deals to use the car etc.. if he mows the lawn, yes the joys of fatherhood are many. At least my daughter ia atill only 2 so I still have a few years untill I have to worry anout lawn mowing or her discovering boys (or boys discovering her)
(I hope you have a riding mower for your son)
Pray hard but pray with care For the tears that you are crying now Are just your answered prayers
Beefmoney From United States of America, joined Oct 2000, 1124 posts, RR: 3
Reply 8, posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 4 days 3 hours ago) and read 1704 times:
Its a little known fact that 98% of the world has Lawnmower Incompetancy Syndrome. These poor people, mostly in third world countries with poor medical care, have the inability to properly use and operate a standard mower. Its so sad.
But with your help, and a donation of 50$, we can wipe out L.I.S. in our lifetimes!
Illini_152 From United States of America, joined Jan 2001, 1000 posts, RR: 2
Reply 13, posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 1664 times:
No, you're not the only one, I used to LOVE to mow the lawn (I NEVER just cut the grass, it was much more than that!). I could take pride in how green and well kept it looked, and it was a way me and my old man bonded.
Of course, my little brother got canned from the job 3 times, and I ended up doing it because I enjoyed it, go figure. I'd still do it to this day, if I was at home. Now my 18 year old brother does jack shit and sits on his ass while my mother has to run the whole show on her own... .
Happy contrails - I support B747Skipper and Jetguy
L-188 From United States of America, joined Jul 1999, 30267 posts, RR: 57
Reply 15, posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 1633 times:
You know it probably would have been cheaper to get a couple of sheep rather then have kids.
They work for free, keep it nice and even, and automaticly fertilize as they go allong. Also if they become extranious, you just send them off to the mutton plant.
Kids wine, cry, have band camp, need to be taken to soccer camp....Just to much work.
Seriously though. I felt the same way about shoveling my driveway....But rather then go out and knock up some broad, I bought a Snowblower instead. This fall however the gods where against me and we never got enough snow to where I could actually run the thing.
OBAMA-WORST PRESIDENT EVER....Even SKOORB would be better.
Matt D From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 9502 posts, RR: 42
Reply 16, posted (12 years 9 months 2 weeks 3 days 16 hours ago) and read 1615 times:
No HERE are the Major Milestones in a mans life:
Your first kiss
Your first lay
Your first drunk
Your drivers license
Your first job
Your first car
Your graduation day(s)
Your first place on your own
Your first house
Your wedding day
Your first child
Your first suit
Your first bottle of vitamins
Your first glass of Milanta
Your first root canal
Your first bottle of Preparation H
Your first pair of reading glasses
Your first Barcalounger
Your first Senior Discount