One-Liners: Best And Worst. — Non Aviation Forum

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One-Liners: Best And Worst.

Cancidas From Poland, joined Jul 2003, 4112 posts, RR: 13
Posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 17 hours ago) and read 1257 times:

What are the best, worst, favourite, despised one liners you've heard? And do say if they make you feel Pissed , or Confused , or Yawn .

"...cannot the kingdom of salvation take me home."

20 replies: All unread, jump to last

BigPhilNYC From United States of America, joined Jan 2002, 4073 posts, RR: 56
Reply 1, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 17 hours ago) and read 1255 times:

I hate this. When you're asked about 'em, you cna never remember them. lol

Phil Derner Jr.

BlatantEcho From United States of America, joined Sep 2000, 1873 posts, RR: 1
Reply 2, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 16 hours ago) and read 1236 times:

hey baby........are those space pants? cuz your ass is outta this world.

*sigh*
George

They're not handing trophies out today

AerLingus From China, joined Mar 2000, 2371 posts, RR: 0
Reply 3, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 15 hours ago) and read 1229 times:

Think it's bad now? Just wait...this cold sore is just gettin' started.

Get your patchouli stink outta my store!

BigPhilNYC From United States of America, joined Jan 2002, 4073 posts, RR: 56
Reply 4, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 15 hours ago) and read 1226 times:

I dont think he meant pickup lines. I think he meant jokes like "I was thinking about shaving my head and telling people that I dyed it clear."

Phil Derner Jr.

AerLingus From China, joined Mar 2000, 2371 posts, RR: 0
Reply 5, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 15 hours ago) and read 1219 times:

Oh...
In that case, a computer beat me at chess once but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Get your patchouli stink outta my store!

Srbmod From United States of America, joined Mar 2001, 16896 posts, RR: 51
Reply 6, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 6 hours ago) and read 1177 times:

Support Airliners.net - become a First Class Member!

Rectum, damn near killed him!

N202PA From United States of America, joined Jun 2000, 1550 posts, RR: 4
Reply 7, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 5 hours ago) and read 1172 times:

So, a baby seal walks into a club... Big grin

AIR757200 From United States of America, joined Jul 2000, 1579 posts, RR: 8
Reply 8, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 5 hours ago) and read 1166 times:

I was waiting at the check out line at Target and an employee or something comes up, smiles.. stands next to me.. then asks the forbidden.................

"What kind of gel do you use!?"

I look at him... "What?" (what I was really trying to say was: What the Hell?) No wonder your hitting on guys if your using pick-up lines like that with girls and it hasn't gotten you anything!

Stalker.

Cedarjet From United Kingdom, joined May 1999, 7724 posts, RR: 55
Reply 9, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 5 hours ago) and read 1164 times:

Contradictions:

I would never exaggerate in a million years.
I would never patronise you; I presume you know the meaning of the word?
Pretentious, moi?
Military intelligence
Military music
Socialist Worker.

fly Saha Air 707s daily from Tehran's downtown Mehrabad to Mashhad, Kish Island and Ahwaz

KROC From United States of America, joined May 2000, 19737 posts, RR: 75
Reply 10, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 5 hours ago) and read 1161 times:

"Hey baby. You have a real nice jaw line. Yeah, it'll line up real good with my nuts!"

"Never tell anybody outside the family what you're thinking again"

Cancidas From Poland, joined Jul 2003, 4112 posts, RR: 13
Reply 11, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 4 hours ago) and read 1148 times:

Pickup lines too. Ladies?

"...cannot the kingdom of salvation take me home."

BigPhilNYC From United States of America, joined Jan 2002, 4073 posts, RR: 56
Reply 12, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 3 hours ago) and read 1145 times:

We already have a thread for that running right now though.

All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.

When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

All fromt he man, Steven Wright.

http://www.weather.net/zarg/ZarPages/stevenWright.html

Kind of the one-liner.

Phil Derner Jr.

Charleslp From United States of America, joined Oct 2001, 336 posts, RR: 0
Reply 13, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 2 hours ago) and read 1122 times:

"Now let's you just drop them pants."

BOAC From United Kingdom, joined Jul 2003, 77 posts, RR: 0
Reply 14, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 1 hour ago) and read 1105 times:

Pick up lines :

Get your coat - you've pulled

Triscl From United States of America, joined Jul 2003, 138 posts, RR: 0
Reply 15, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days 1 hour ago) and read 1099 times:

liquor? I hardly know her.

you decide if that's best or worst.

Seb146 From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 9914 posts, RR: 17
Reply 16, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 3 days ago) and read 1098 times:

BigPhil: LOL Steven Wright is THE MAN!!! The tone of his voice makes those one-liners even funnier!

I usualy just end up telling punch lines to jokes. Not the whole joke, just the punch line.

'We just came off of Route 140.'
'We come not to praise your berries but to sieze them.'

GO CANUCKS!!

GO CANUCKS GO!!

Charleslp From United States of America, joined Oct 2001, 336 posts, RR: 0
Reply 17, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 1064 times:

Dude! You're gettin' a DELL!!

727_Gal From United States of America, joined Sep 2002, 325 posts, RR: 3
Reply 18, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 2 days 19 hours ago) and read 1052 times:

"I would have been here sooner, but a manure-spreader jacknifed on the Santa Ana. You should see my shoes."

- Chevy Chase, Fletch

MSYtristar From United States of America, joined Aug 2005, 6251 posts, RR: 51
Reply 19, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 2 days 18 hours ago) and read 1027 times:

Rectum? Damn near killed 'em!

Homer71 From United States of America, joined Jul 2001, 2209 posts, RR: 16
Reply 20, posted (9 years 11 months 1 week 2 days 6 hours ago) and read 1000 times:

"Man who go through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok."
-Confucius

"On spaceship earth there are no passengers...only crew."

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