Sponsor Message:
Non Aviation Forum
My Starred Topics | Profile | New Topic | Forum Index | Help | Search 
Caught My Roomate In The ACT....  
User currently offlineM&m From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 3088 times:

Yup that's right, this evening on my way back from walgreens I walk to my door, swing the door open and guess what I see...my roomie with his shorts down to his thighs sitting in front of his computer stroking his sausage.

Of course his tries quickly not only to pull his shorts, but to cover up what he's watching on his comp. I just merely act as though I don't take notice and chuckle. What makes things even more funny is that this is the THIRD time I caught him.

Am I right in assuming that the first thing you do if you want to pleasure urself is to make sure everywhere is locked, well that was not the case here. All three times the door was left unlocked and I saw everything.

This time I want to tease him a little about it without him nessarily knowing that I know. I was thinking of writing a little note to him before I go to class how does this sound:

"Next time lock the door, and I don't mean before bedtime  Wink/being sarcastic" or
"When taken care of buisness, LOCK THE DOOR  Laugh out loud "

Can yall think of anything catchy I can write? I can't wait to see his face!


104 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineDesertJets From United States of America, joined Feb 2000, 7760 posts, RR: 16
Reply 1, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 3069 times:

I once explained this to one of my former female roomates. When two or more guys inhabit a dormroom, it is an unspoken rule that when you are supposed to be gone for class or whatnot, that you be gone so the other person can take care of business so to speak.

So your roomate needs to rethink his masturbatory habits, and lock the door when he feels the need to squeeze.



Stop drop and roll will not save you in hell. --- seen on a church marque in rural Virginia
User currently offlineCancidas From Poland, joined Jul 2003, 4112 posts, RR: 11
Reply 2, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 3061 times:

a tie tied to the doorknob serves the same purpose.

but what sucks, walking in on a friend's roommate doing with a guy in my freind's bed. he didn't know the other guy was gay, i had no idea how to break it to him.

[Edited 2003-10-14 05:27:06]


"...cannot the kingdom of salvation take me home."
User currently offlineKevi747 From United States of America, joined Apr 2001, 1058 posts, RR: 12
Reply 3, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 3048 times:

You're supposed to make a lot of unnecessary noise (jangling of keys, fumbling with the lock, or pretending to drop your bookbag all work fine) as you enter the dorm/apartment. You could even shout, "Hey, are you home?" as you come in. What ever you do, make sure you allow at least a good 7 seconds for the roommate to cover any incriminating evidence. This will help avoid any future awkward moments.


"Reality has a well-known liberal bias." --Stephen Colbert
User currently offlineBigphilnyc From United States of America, joined Jan 2002, 4076 posts, RR: 54
Reply 4, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 1 day 3 hours ago) and read 3037 times:

"Lock the door before you walk the dog."

"Your purple monster is a secret, make sure no one can see it."

"Wipe the keyboard when you're done"

"You may not need condoms, but at least get a splashguard."

or better yet:

"No wonder you stroke it, with a schlong that small, no wya you can get a girl."



Phil Derner Jr.
User currently offlineCovert From Ghana, joined Oct 2001, 1450 posts, RR: 2
Reply 5, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 2978 times:

I thought the funny part was coming back from Walgreens.

Signed,
AA61Hvy



thank goodness for TCAS !
User currently offlineFlyboyOz From Australia, joined Nov 2000, 1985 posts, RR: 25
Reply 6, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 22 hours ago) and read 2937 times:

Wow! that's quite odd...how come he didnt care whether you're in or not. Probably, he is gay? (just kidding)...I think u should knock the door at the corridor (I mean outside your apartment not his room door). After u knocked it, u pretended that you lost your keys. Then he will come out and cover up quickly.

Well...I caught my schoolmate many times that he always stretches his sauage in order to make his pants feel comfortable and fit. It made me laugh quietly. What i am going to say to my mate? Like I said "Stop making fussy?" "stop stetching in front of me?"

Cheers



The Spirit of AustraliAN - Longreach
User currently offlineBigphilnyc From United States of America, joined Jan 2002, 4076 posts, RR: 54
Reply 7, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 19 hours ago) and read 2893 times:

I would just call him "Peter" from now on. lol


Phil Derner Jr.
User currently offlineDavid b. From United States of America, joined Jun 2001, 3148 posts, RR: 5
Reply 8, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 17 hours ago) and read 2852 times:

If you were a good roomate, you would have given him a hand  Big thumbs up


Teenage-know-it-alls should be shot on sight
User currently offlineLHMark From United States of America, joined Jan 2000, 7255 posts, RR: 47
Reply 9, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 17 hours ago) and read 2846 times:

So M&m, how long have you been rooming with KROC now?


"Sympathy is something that shouldn't be bestowed on the Yankees. Apparently it angers them." - Bob Feller
User currently offlineStretch 8 From United States of America, joined May 1999, 2568 posts, RR: 16
Reply 10, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 17 hours ago) and read 2843 times:

Let's face it lads, we ALL stroke our sausages. M&M, you are probably more discrete with your self-pleasuring than your roommate. Just ask him to try and be discrete. He should respect your privacy as you respects his.





Maggs swings, it's a drive deep to left! The Tigers are going to the World Series!!!
User currently offlineMatt D From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 9502 posts, RR: 47
Reply 11, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 16 hours ago) and read 2815 times:

I agree with Stretch 8.

What is the big deal? We ALL have experienced self-induced orgasms at some point in our lives. It sure beats getting a hooker or going down to the noodie-both and risk getting arrested, or getting tangles up in an Internet fiasco.

When my cousin Steve came down a couple of weeks ago, I told him where I keep my DVD's and Videos, offered him a bottle of motion lotion, and a clean towel, and a trash bag to put it in when he was done, and that I was going to sleep for the night and for him to clean up when he was done.

He too seemed a little shell shocked, but then quickly thanked me for the down to earth attitude. So while I was in my room drifting off to sleep, he was in the den, watching "Hot Showers Vol. 5"


User currently offlineDelboy From United Kingdom, joined Jun 2001, 725 posts, RR: 0
Reply 12, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 15 hours ago) and read 2783 times:


What's your problem, it's his and he will wash it as fast as he likes.


User currently offlineKROC From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 13, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 14 hours ago) and read 2763 times:

Let's face it lads, we ALL stroke our sausages

I don't like to stroke my sausage...I just like stroking other guys sausages.

Signed, LhmARK


User currently offlineN6376m From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 14, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 13 hours ago) and read 2735 times:

Kroc,

Sorry but that's a weak retort to LhmArk's post. IMO it deserves the coveted "knock out" picture.

Let's give credit where credit is due!

 Big grin


User currently offlineAA61hvy From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 13977 posts, RR: 57
Reply 15, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2694 times:

God, I wish I could catch my roomate in the act
Signed, Covert



Go big or go home
User currently offlineLHMark From United States of America, joined Jan 2000, 7255 posts, RR: 47
Reply 16, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2687 times:

Yeah! You tell 'Im, N6376m! Testify!


"Sympathy is something that shouldn't be bestowed on the Yankees. Apparently it angers them." - Bob Feller
User currently offlineKROC From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 17, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2673 times:

Why is that AA61hvy? You and Jcs flying in tonight?

N6376m - hey, I'm not perfect all the time. Thing is, for that comment, you now have LHMark on your nutsack. But then again, having a dude on your sack is nothing new for you right?  Big grin

And lets face it. Nobody will make a worse post than Covert did earlier in the thread.


User currently offlineAA61hvy From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 13977 posts, RR: 57
Reply 18, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2662 times:

Nah my post needs to be deleted because it should be in the Matt D in NYC-Love fest thread.


Go big or go home
User currently offlineUal747 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 19, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2656 times:

The stupid gay jokes just keep going and going and going, without anyone caring if they are offending. Gotta love America. Gay jokes are still politically correct racism. Why don't we make fun of some black people now, or maybe some of them jews?

UAL747


User currently offlineKROC From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 20, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2654 times:

Or maybe little rich kids at SMU?

User currently offlineUal747 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 21, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 12 hours ago) and read 2650 times:

KROC, you know it's not the same thing. Several other people have emailed me about how offensive some people are about gays on this forum. Same thing as racism. I mean, can you explain logically why it's okay to make fun of gay people and not blacks?

UAL747


User currently offlineAA61hvy From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 13977 posts, RR: 57
Reply 22, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 11 hours ago) and read 2636 times:

I make fun of people who I know can take a joke. I know JCS and Matt D are not gay.. KROC may be, but he can take a joke. I won't make fun of a gay person directly.


Go big or go home
User currently offlineN6376m From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 23, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 11 hours ago) and read 2616 times:

KROC,

You're reaching. LHMark's comment was laugh out loud funny.

Come on - post the knock out picture and be done with it! He's earned it.

-76M


User currently offlineUal747 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 24, posted (10 years 9 months 3 weeks 10 hours ago) and read 2582 times:

"I make fun of people who I know can take a joke. I know JCS and Matt D are not gay.. KROC may be, but he can take a joke. I won't make fun of a gay person directly. "

Okay, you're totally missing my point. I don't care whether they can take a joke or not. It's still offensive.

So you are going to tell me that you don't make fun of a gay person directly. So you make fun of them behind their backs? That's even worse. Do you also make fun of black people behind their backs?

So please, in your next signed by post, please say:

"Because I'm a big 'ole stupid black boy."
Signed, KROC (Or whoever you chose)

Wouldn't that be funny? And I'm sure you won't offend anyone, because these people can take a joke, right?

UAL747


[Edited 2003-10-14 22:29:39]

25 AA61hvy : I joke around with my black friends... I'll say a racist joke and they will do one right back. Whats your point?
26 Post contains images Matt D : So far nobody has earned the KO. However, as a nice consolation prize (and please don't let your consoling get too far out of control), I can tell you
27 Ual747 : Yeah, because you know those people, and you don't do it on a PUBLIC forum. When you do it here, everyone sees it, and some people are offended. Perso
28 Matt D : and some people are offended. Personally, I am, and so are other people. so would you be offended if I told you that I was having roast leg of lamb co
29 Ual747 : What does that have to do with anything? I don't care what you eat.
30 Post contains images Matt D : Stay tuned pal. Believe me. LOTS of people will see it.
31 Ual747 : Fuck off dude.......I can't believe some of you.....absolutely no fucking respect. Your as bad as a damn 7th grader. [Edited 2003-10-14 22:35:10]
32 Gocaps16 : Watch your mouth. -Cast
33 Aloha717200 : Seconded! filler filler fill
34 Learpilot : Someone get Rodney Dangerfield there a sense of humor.
35 N6376m : Ual747 - Dude calm down. Not everything is a reason for a verbal riot. I suggest that you hang a tie on your dorm room door and log onto the appropria
36 Stretch 8 : gay or straight, one thing we can all agree on: self-induced orgasms can be great fun, unless you are caught in the act in mid-spurt.
37 Covert : I don't have a roomate...
38 Kevi747 : Ual747, try not to get so offended. These guys really aren't being homophobic intentionally, they're just dumbasses. If you ever hung out with straigh
39 LHMark : Mention to most straight guys that they would participate in male/male sexual contact and they'll go into paroxysms of rage. Therein lies the humor. I
40 N766UA : Gay humor is "in." Get used to it. Everyone says it so it becomes engrained in your mind. I say stuff like that all the time, does that mean I'm simpl
41 Covert : Mention to most straight guys that they would participate in male/male sexual contact and they'll go into paroxysms of rage Don't mention that to me,
42 Post contains images LHMark : So, Covert, to bring it back on topic, what does YOUR roommate see on your screen when he catches you?
43 Post contains images KROC : KROC, you know it's not the same thing. Several other people have emailed me about how offensive some people are about gays on this forum. Same thing
44 Covert : I just posted five posts above yours that I don't have a goddamn roomate. And I am not ashamed to admit that I shift my gears it's better than getting
45 Ual747 : KROC, I did email the site. Thank you. Now, why don't you just delete the fuck off post. I won't cry like a little girl. But if you are going to delet
46 LHMark : Oh, Come ON, Covert... a fine piece of prime angus beef like KROC is worth at least twelve dollars Signed, AA61hvy
47 KROC : Ual747 - Matt D's post broke no rules, yours did. And yeah, YOU emailed the site, but why do all these mysterious "offended" people email YOU as oppos
48 Ual747 : Because of the posts I posted in the "Fundie baptist" thread, and some others on the Aviation forum. I have no idea why they aren't emailing the site,
49 KROC : Yes, compile me a list of these names, and send to nycialini@yahoo.com so I can see if I can help them with their greivences.
50 Ual747 : Check your mail. UAL747
51 Covert : Noone is laughing at this point, LHMark...
52 KROC : Covert. You wanna see something that really had nobody laughing...here it is. I thought the funny part was coming back from Walgreens. Signed, AA61Hvy
53 BOEING747-700 : guys, its the F*cking INTERNET, who cares???????? Yikes. I am going to workout later
54 Covert : On my way to do my daily PT right now...
55 AA61hvy : Lift hard Jordan -- Ual747, here is a suggestion, stay away from the non-av forum if you are so damn offended, better yet stay inside and sit in your
56 Post contains images Jcs17 : Gay jokes are still politically correct racism. Since when is gay a race? And if gay jokes are still "politically correct," then why do rockhead athle
57 LHMark : Oh, I don't know, Covert. Anyone with enough sense not to sweat the small sh**t is probably still willing to invest a chuckle. Do a couple extra situp
58 Post contains images Kevi747 : "Kevi. You my friend, I love how you "told us" the signed by posts were old and tired, yet you chose to do so my starting a thread that encouraged the
59 Flight152 : Yeah, hilarious. And so is telling someone to pull your finger and then farting. Or saying "poo poo". See Ual747?.......dumbasses. Maybe YOUR the dumb
60 Post contains images Kevi747 : "Once again, Kevi being a drama queen" Thanks!
61 FlyboyOz : I thought ual747 is christian and how come he acts very strange lately!
62 Flight152 : That really was not ment as a compliment. Talk about thick-skinned..
63 Chgoan : Man.....how a funny story turns into a hot debate topic so fast.....
64 Kevi747 : "That really was not ment as a compliment." Really? Because, you see, I thought that you were complimenting me. (And since you're obviously the type w
65 Tbar220 : If gays on this website say that the gay/signed-by posts offend them, how hard is it for us to say, "Ok, we'll try not to do it anymore?" and not make
66 Kevi747 : "how hard is it for us to say, "Ok, we'll try not to do it anymore?" " Hey Tbar220. The problem is this: that would require some empathy, compassion,
67 Jcs17 : Well, actually I think Jcs17 really is a pretty hateful young man. I'm sure he'd love nothing more than to see us all rounded up and gassed. But the r
68 Seb146 : I, as a gay man, think most of the 'signed by' posts are funny. Do I need to turn in my lavender card? BACK ON TOPIC: I did not see any ages given, bu
69 BR715-A1-30 : UAL747, Calm down dude, If you can't run with the BIG DOGS, stay on the porch. You seem to be the only person whining about this. I'd say you deserve
70 N6376m : Let's get back on topic - KROC deserves to be KO'd for LHMark's reply #9. UAL747's girlish whinnings have totally drawn the focus away from this. -76M
71 LHMark : If KROC admitted it every time he got KO'd by me, he'd wind up lighting the torch in a touching, yet emotional Athens Olympic Games ceremony.
72 Aviatortj : Put your class schedule up in an open spot on the wall. Adhere to the times on there. Hopefully that will help. I would have done 3 strikes you're out
73 N6376m : Yet another strong blow by LHMark. He's on a roll. Come on people, show your support for the KO!!!!
74 Post contains images Matt D : You're right. There is a KO that needs to be issued here. So here goes: KROC, in one of the finest moments of his career absolutely decimated all of h
75 Post contains images KROC : I have issued the KO against myself on behalf of LHMark one time when it was deserved. LhmARK, feel free to check out "Company going under" and "Favor
76 LHMark : Just picking my head up off the canvas on the "Company going under" thread... my mouthpiece tastes kinda funny.
77 ScarletHarlot : Just my two cents: I'm a girl (are you going to accuse me of 'whining like a girl' now?) and I'm straight and I totally agree with Ual747 and Kevi747.
78 LhmARK : Harlot, you're right, but there are ways to poke fun at people without labelling them or calling them names. Those posts are funny. "Dude, you're a ho
79 N6376m : Scarlet - Aren't you a girl?
80 KROC : Okay, so we're at a stand still. Some think gay jokes ar funny. Some do not. Round and round, round we go.
81 Kevi747 : Alright Miss Scarlet!! Proof once again that a straight woman is always a gay mans best friend. But let me just clarify one thing: It's not the homoph
82 N6376m : "KROC going down on JCS17. . . ." Suggest deletion simply because of the mental damage caused by that phrase.
83 Post contains images ScarletHarlot : N6376m, yes, I'm a girl. I said so above! LHMark - that's Ms. Harlot to you.
84 AA61hvy : "KROC going down on JCS17. . . ." I just dry heaved....
85 TWFirst : "KROC going down on JCS17. . . ." Yes, I agree that is incredibly inflammatory and just plain wrong. Everyone knows KROC is the top and JCS is the sub
86 AA61hvy : Too many caps again....
87 Post contains images Seb146 : I have been around these forums for a while now, and I know who is joking about the fag stuff and who is not. I have said before in other threads that
88 AA61hvy : "no one gets out alive" Heh, no kiddin! -- My attitude is, if you have a problem with me saying the stuff I say, be a man and email me or something. M
89 N6376m : N6376m, yes, I'm a girl. I said so above! Scarlet, my "question" was tounge in cheek. Posted as a reply to your comment are you going to accuse me of
90 Post contains images ScarletHarlot : N6376M - I 'throw like a girl' too.
91 LHMark : So, Ms. Harlot, ever catch your roommate in the ACT?
92 Canadi>nBoy : "guys, its the F*cking INTERNET, who cares???????? Yike" You know, as strange as this may sound, that has to be one of the most on-target, intelligent
93 Covert : Shall we continue the fag jokes now?
94 Aviatortj : Covert: I second your decision.
95 Gocaps16 : Well, gotta do what you gotta do. It's what every man does. Kevin[Edited 2003-10-16 22:04:57]
96 Post contains images Gocaps16 : This thread deserves the: Kevin
97 Andersjt : At the risk of "mo" jokes or bashing, I'm sorry, but the talk of "guy on guy" action had me intrigued.
98 Post contains images AIR757200 : Wow, I made it to the bottom of the post! Interesting discussion folks. Do I need to turn in my lavender card? Seb146.. LOL. That's the only construct
99 Stretch 8 : I have not been keeping up with this thread (note the number of hits/views!). How did the gay-bashing start? Because the roomie was caught a third tim
100 AA61hvy : I could see m&m wearing an orange pancho to bed with the hood on! haha
101 Airlinelover : All I'd say is this: "Damn.. You missed me THAT MUCH?!??!!?" It'd get him to stop rather fast.. Chris
102 Post contains images JBLUA320 : "Hey Tbar220. The problem is this: that would require some empathy, compassion, and maturity....three characteristics which are in short supply here."
103 Galaxy5 : Just buy him a new Monkey towel, place it on his key board so he doesn't mess and ask him to lock the door next time. Army Guys are always being caugh
104 Chgoan : I always wondered how military guys took care of business when living in cramped quarters.....barracks...submarines...boats. I kinda figured they just
Top Of Page
Forum Index

This topic is archived and can not be replied to any more.

Printer friendly format

Similar topics:More similar topics...
L-188; I Think I Caught Him In The Act posted Wed Dec 15 2004 03:41:03 by Superfly
I Punched My Dog In The Face. posted Thu Jul 27 2006 07:04:29 by IAH777
My Turn In The "this Site Is Going Downhill" Game: posted Thu Apr 4 2002 05:08:22 by 747-600X
During My Stay In The US This Happend... posted Tue Oct 23 2001 16:38:21 by SR3496
My Picture In The NY Times! posted Tue Feb 6 2001 03:40:05 by USAFHummer
I'm Out In The Cold (to Chill My Computer)! posted Thu Nov 23 2006 09:51:31 by Lehpron
My Thread With Ass In The Title posted Tue Jun 27 2006 20:22:08 by BaylorAirBear
My Opinion On Why Films Are In The Tank posted Mon May 8 2006 04:46:12 by Blazingcessna
My Little Girl Is In The Hospital posted Tue Feb 21 2006 05:12:42 by GulfstreamGuy
I Can Change My Age Category In The Profile! posted Mon Sep 12 2005 16:34:54 by Mrniji