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Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice  
User currently offlineIakobos From Belgium, joined Aug 2003, 3312 posts, RR: 35
Posted (9 years 11 months 1 day 5 hours ago) and read 1328 times:

Perhaps a chance to have a laugh, possibly a welcome feat under present day life...here follow 17 good reasons to choose the craft with wings.
Glad to see more reasons added, from either side.

1. Airplanes can kill you quickly; a woman takes her time.
2. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
3. Airplanes don't get mad if you 'touch and go.'
4. Airplanes don't object to a preflight inspection.
5. Airplanes operate inverted.
6. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.
7. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits.
8. Airplanes can be flown any time of the month.
9. Airplanes don't come with in-laws.
10. Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown before.
11. Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.
12. Airplanes don't complain if you hose them down.
13. Airplanes don't mind if you like to look at other airplanes.
14. Airplanes can get high without throwing up.
15. Airplanes expect to be tied down.
16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.
17. Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong.
18. However, when airplanes go quiet, just like a woman, it's a bad thing.

14 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineBoeing nut From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 1, posted (9 years 11 months 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1280 times:

If it's got props or tits, it's gonna give you problems.  Laugh out loud

User currently offlineFutureualpilot From United States of America, joined May 2000, 2602 posts, RR: 8
Reply 2, posted (9 years 11 months 1 day 1 hour ago) and read 1275 times:

hahahahaha

Boeing nut that was the funniest thing Ive heard on here latley.

Remember, airplane engines stop whining at the gate....



Life is better when you surf.
User currently offlineDLKAPA From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 3, posted (9 years 11 months 1 day ago) and read 1260 times:

16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.

Woop Woop- Pull Up
Woop Woop- Pull Up


User currently offlineEclipseFlight7 From Somalia, joined Apr 2004, 518 posts, RR: 2
Reply 4, posted (9 years 11 months 23 hours ago) and read 1249 times:

Don't sink
Don't sink
Don't sink
Sink Rate
Sink Rate
Sink Rate
Whoop Whoop- pull up
Whoop Whoop- pull up
Whoop Whoop- pull up
Traffic Alert
Traffic Alert
Traffic Alert

And yes, the airplane is still on the ground.



Holy sh*ts and burritos.
User currently offlineFlagshipAZ From United States of America, joined Jan 2001, 3419 posts, RR: 14
Reply 5, posted (9 years 11 months 22 hours ago) and read 1234 times:

Hugh Hefner had both at one time. A brand-spanking new DC-9-30 & all the bunnies he could stuffed in it.  Wink/being sarcastic Regards.


"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." --Ben Franklin
User currently offlineTrickijedi From United States of America, joined May 2001, 3266 posts, RR: 5
Reply 6, posted (9 years 11 months 22 hours ago) and read 1227 times:

19. Airplanes have no problems taking a full load.


Its better to be on the ground wishing you were in the air than be in the air wishing you were on the ground. Fly safe!
User currently offlineDl021 From United States of America, joined May 2004, 11446 posts, RR: 76
Reply 7, posted (9 years 11 months 21 hours ago) and read 1212 times:
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A woman is good to be inside during a bad storm.

A woman can be refueled easily while traveling somewhere.

A woman will perform acts illegal in Alabama with you in an airplane if properly fueled and lubricated.

A woman will keep you warm on cold winter nights, you have to warm up an airplane on cold winter nights. (Both sometimes do require de-icing, depending on weather conditions).

Hell, I'm going to bed!



Is my Pan Am ticket to the moon still good?
User currently offlineMalb777 From Australia, joined Jul 2004, 462 posts, RR: 1
Reply 8, posted (9 years 11 months 20 hours ago) and read 1199 times:

Both have a cockpit so to speak, its up to the individual as to which to sit in


thank god i was not born a bird. this type of flying is much better
User currently offlineAa61hvy From United States of America, joined Nov 1999, 13977 posts, RR: 57
Reply 9, posted (9 years 11 months 19 hours ago) and read 1193 times:

Women... Last time I checked, a 767 can't give blow jobs.


Go big or go home
User currently offlineZKSUJ From New Zealand, joined May 2004, 7089 posts, RR: 12
Reply 10, posted (9 years 11 months 15 hours ago) and read 1162 times:

Hard question, let me think about it......(to be continued)

User currently offlineTiger119 From United States of America, joined Sep 2003, 1919 posts, RR: 0
Reply 11, posted (9 years 11 months 14 hours ago) and read 1140 times:

Depends on what the woman looks like. You pretty much know what the airplane looks like and what it will do in any given situation............


Flying is the second greatest thrill known to mankind, landing is the first!
User currently offlineKlaus From Germany, joined Jul 2001, 21415 posts, RR: 54
Reply 12, posted (9 years 11 months 14 hours ago) and read 1132 times:

Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.

It gets worse: "... 40 ... 30 ... 20 ... retard! retard! retard!" (Airbus)  Big thumbs up


User currently offlineIakobos From Belgium, joined Aug 2003, 3312 posts, RR: 35
Reply 13, posted (9 years 11 months 13 hours ago) and read 1110 times:

I should have thought that most here are computer-age children and experienced FS room pilots.
In better times, pilots were really driving the planes, with George only giving a helping hand when target altitude and speed had been reached.
Other than George, the only electric help onboard was a bell to call one or more of the delicious air hostesses (a world apart from present day "snack bar style" flight attendants) into the roomy cockpit for whatever reason.

Sorry you missed this chaps.


User currently offlineZKSUJ From New Zealand, joined May 2004, 7089 posts, RR: 12
Reply 14, posted (9 years 10 months 4 weeks 1 day 15 hours ago) and read 1039 times:

(continued from reply 10)
...I will choose aircraft if my girlfriend allows me to Big grin


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