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Ask A Funeral Director/embalmer A Question  
User currently offlineTheGov From United States of America, joined Apr 2003, 414 posts, RR: 3
Posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 11205 times:

Okay, I'll add my topic to this ever evolving list of "Ask a ??? a question".

So, as a licensed funeral director and embalmer, feel free to ask me a question.


Always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
67 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlinePl4nekr4zy From United States of America, joined Aug 2003, 465 posts, RR: 3
Reply 1, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 11204 times:

Why did you choose this career?


"Don't forget to bring a towel!"
User currently offlineAJBUS300 From United States of America, joined Mar 2005, 316 posts, RR: 0
Reply 2, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 11198 times:

yea, why and do you ever have nightmares with the dead people you work on?

Do you wash your hands A LOT like after you wash them just out of grossness?

Do you eat right after you embalm or do you find that repulsive?

Are you ever afraid of the dead person you are working on from coming to life and touching you or the spirit be standing behind you or something?

In the embalming process, what EXACTLY is it that you do?...give details

SOrry lots of questions but not often you get to ask a person in your profession questions......and if y'all are wondering, yes I am a big fan of the show "family plots" on AE......



Live each day as if it was your last day on God's beautiful green earth
User currently offlineAsstChiefMark From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 3, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 11195 times:

Gov: That's cool! I have two friends that are funeral directors. Sometimes they call me to help them move bodies, caskets, and vaults. I enjoy watching them work with families. The compassion and professionalism is amazing. It's something I've thought about adding to my repertoire of professions. How much more education is required if I'm already a BSN?

Mark


User currently offlineTheGov From United States of America, joined Apr 2003, 414 posts, RR: 3
Reply 4, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 11189 times:

Pl4nekr4zy ~ I ask myself that question from time to time. But, in all honesty, it is a calling. I enjoy serving the families that call on me. It is an awesome task to help a family deal with the death of a loved one. Even after almost 10 years in this business, I still don't always know what to say. But, they are counting on me to deal with something that they may only deal with every 10 years. There is a great amount of self-satisfaction when a family knows and acknowledges that you have given them the best service you can for their loved one. That makes it worth doing day in and day out.


Always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
User currently offlineConfuscius From United States of America, joined Aug 2001, 3829 posts, RR: 1
Reply 5, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 11171 times:

Please describe how to use a trocar in the embalming process.


Ain't I a stinker?
User currently offlineACDC8 From Canada, joined Mar 2005, 7642 posts, RR: 36
Reply 6, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 20 hours ago) and read 11151 times:

This is what I've always wanted to know. Since you are around death all the time. What are your views on the death of your loved ones or yourself?

cheers,
Patrick



A Grumpy German Is A Sauerkraut
User currently offlineTACAA320 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 7, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 20 hours ago) and read 11145 times:

Did you have any scary experience[s] in your career?

If yes, can you describe it?

Thanks,


User currently offlineFlybyguy From United States of America, joined Jun 2004, 1801 posts, RR: 1
Reply 8, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 19 hours ago) and read 11135 times:

What is done with decomposed bodies? Are they dressed or kept in bodybags for burial? Are they still embalmed?

Is sterilization of tools necessary if they are used on the deceased?

When bodies are shipped, are they shipped in crates or original caskets? Is dry ice used in the preservation process for the journey?

My parents have seriously considered building a family tomb overseas, but in that particular country there seems to be no experts on the subject, can you refer them to anyone that may have some clue how to do it?

[Edited 2005-04-04 08:35:07]


"Are you a pretender... or a thoroughbred?!" - Professor Matt Miller
User currently offlineAerorobnz From Rwanda, joined Feb 2001, 7155 posts, RR: 13
Reply 9, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 3 days 16 hours ago) and read 11116 times:

Would you do the full Egyptian embalming/mummification process if requested by the deceased?

Personally I believe that if you can handle the families in this job, you could do just about any job in the world. I have the utmost respect for you guys, I'm sure you get some horrible situations that make airline customer services look tame in comparison.


User currently offlineTheGov From United States of America, joined Apr 2003, 414 posts, RR: 3
Reply 10, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 11052 times:

Answers, we have answers. Sorry for taking so long, but work does occupy part of my day.

Quoting AJBUS300 (Reply 2):
yea, why and do you ever have nightmares with the dead people you work on?

Nope, no nightmares, ever.

Quoting AJBUS300 (Reply 2):
Do you wash your hands A LOT like after you wash them just out of grossness?

While we do wear gloves during the embalming process, I still prefer to wash my hands afterwards. After all, we never really know what disease/illness a person is carrying. And they certainly cannot tell you.

Quoting AJBUS300 (Reply 2):
Do you eat right after you embalm or do you find that repulsive?

I eat when I get hungry. Doesn't bother me if it is right after embalming or not.

Quoting AJBUS300 (Reply 2):
Are you ever afraid of the dead person you are working on from coming to life and touching you or the spirit be standing behind you or something?

Nope. I do, however, treat the deceased as if they were watching what I was doing.

Quoting AJBUS300 (Reply 2):
In the embalming process, what EXACTLY is it that you do?...give details

In the interest of brevity, let me send you to this link:
The embalming process explained

Quoting AsstChiefMark (Reply 3):
How much more education is required if I'm already a BSN?

It really depends on the state in which you would like to work. When I was in school, Colorado required no school whereas Ohio required a BA. I went to a mortuary school that has a 9 month or 12 month program, depending on what you want. ( a degree or a certificate). I already had a BA so I went for 9 months.

Quoting Confuscius (Reply 5):
Please describe how to use a trocar in the embalming process

A trocar is a long, hollow instrument with a pointed end used to remove any body fluids in the body that are not removed via arterial embalming. Most often, it is used to remove fluid from the lungs, intestines, stomach and bladder. Once the body fluid is removed, it is then used to insert a more powerful embalming fluid into the body trunk.


Quoting ACDC8 (Reply 6):
This is what I've always wanted to know. Since you are around death all the time. What are your views on the death of your loved ones or yourself?

I recently conducted the services of two individuals that I was very close to. Both were unique and difficult in their own ways. I try not to let it get to me, but I am human. I just want to do the best job I can, be the deceased my relative or not. As for me, I am trying to live forever. So far, I am succeeding.

Quoting TACAA320 (Reply 7):
Did you have any scary experience[s] in your career?

No, not really. The relatives of the deceased can be scary sometimes, especially if they are mad at each other.

Quoting Flybyguy (Reply 8):
What is done with decomposed bodies? Are they dressed or kept in bodybags for burial? Are they still embalmed?

Ask any embalmer out there, and their immediate answer would be to suggest cremation, especially if the body is body decomposed, but not yet to bones. If they are really bad (been in the lake for a week, etc.), the best thing to do is to cover the body with an embalming powder (to reduce the odor) and to bury them right away.

Quoting Flybyguy (Reply 8):
Is sterilization of tools necessary if they are used on the deceased?

Yes, a decomposition process called tissue gas can travel from one body to another via unsterilized instruments. And that is not good for any funeral home.

Quoting Flybyguy (Reply 8):
When bodies are shipped, are they shipped in crates or original caskets? Is dry ice used in the preservation process for the journey?

It depends. A body can be shipped within the US without being in a casket. The boxes used are called combo units. However, some foreign countries require the remains to be in a casket. The casket is shipped in a box called an airtray. BTW, a sealer casket cannot be sealed if it is going to be put on an airplane. The pressure difference will cause the lid to collapse. No, dry ice is not used. It is best that the body be embalmed before being shipped. Dry ice is considered a hazardous material by the airlines and is not used by the funeral industry.

Quoting Flybyguy (Reply 8):
My parents have seriously considered building a family tomb overseas, but in that particular country there seems to be no experts on the subject, can you refer them to anyone that may have some clue how to do it?

I cannot help you directly. But you might try a local funeral home or perhaps a local stonemason. They may be able to help you.

Quoting Aerorobnz (Reply 9):
Would you do the full Egyptian embalming/mummification process if requested by the deceased?

While I am not trained to do that procedure, if a family asked for it, I would certainly try to help them.

Quoting Aerorobnz (Reply 9):
Personally I believe that if you can handle the families in this job, you could do just about any job in the world. I have the utmost respect for you guys, I'm sure you get some horrible situations that make airline customer services look tame in comparison.

Thank you for the compliment. Having worked in both the airline industry as well as the funeral industry, I can easily see the pluses and minuses of both jobs. Right now, the stability of the funeral industry makes me glad that I am not suffering with my former co-workers at a well know, established Georgia airline.



Always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
User currently offlineJaysit From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 11, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 23 hours ago) and read 11043 times:

Based on what you know, how long does it take for bodies to decompose after being subjected to modern day American embalming? To what extent will embalming arrest the decomposition of the body? If the body is exhumed, say, one year after burial (lets say burial in a place with a dry climate), what would you expect it to look like?

Very interesting thread, by the way.


User currently offlineTheGov From United States of America, joined Apr 2003, 414 posts, RR: 3
Reply 12, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 11035 times:

Quoting Jaysit (Reply 11):
Based on what you know, how long does it take for bodies to decompose after being subjected to modern day American embalming? To what extent will embalming arrest the decomposition of the body? If the body is exhumed, say, one year after burial (lets say burial in a place with a dry climate), what would you expect it to look like?

I honestly could not tell you. It might take 30 days or 30 years. Embalming is like medication in that what works for one person may not work for another person. In other words, some bodies react positively to the embalming process while some do not. I have seen some bodies that look just as good seven days after the embalming process as they did the first day. And I have seen bodies that you hope will make it through the funeral, which is just two days after death. Believe it or not, the mode of death plays a big part in how well an embalmed body will last before significant decomposition begins. An accident victim may begin decomposing well before the 90 year old who died of heart failure.

After one year in a dry climate? If the deceased were an average person ( no accident victim or an agressively treated cancer patient) I would expect them to look pretty much the same as they did when they were buried. There would probably be areas of dehydration around the fingertips, nose and cheeks, however. I have heard that mold has been found on some bodies that have been buried for a while. But, in a dry climate, mummification might have occurred even after one year.

Quoting Jaysit (Reply 11):
Very interesting thread, by the way.

Glad to be of service.



Always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
User currently offlineSpringbok747 From Australia, joined Nov 2004, 4387 posts, RR: 11
Reply 13, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 22 hours ago) and read 11019 times:

Wow Gov, cool profession.

I have one question:

What do you do with all the internal organs that you remove from the deceased?



אני תומך בישראל
User currently offlineGOCAPS16 From Japan, joined Jan 2000, 4338 posts, RR: 21
Reply 14, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 2 days 19 hours ago) and read 10997 times:

I dont know if it's true or not.and you can clarify..but do you use glue to close the eyes together? any other areas too? My uncle passed away couple monthsd ago and during his viewing I noticed on his hands felt like and looked like clay or artificial skin...is it just the natural dead skin? Very interesting....I've done military funeral details...not really a big deal to me seeing veterans, retired, and active duty members fighting for our country...but it's really sad and it's an honor to be part of the detail for their loved ones.

Kevin


User currently offlineTheGov From United States of America, joined Apr 2003, 414 posts, RR: 3
Reply 15, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 22 hours ago) and read 10943 times:

Quoting Springbok747 (Reply 13):
What do you do with all the internal organs that you remove from the deceased?

Nothing. The embalming process does not require nor include the removing of any or all of the internal organs. We only remove the fluids (i.e. blood, fluid in the lungs, etc) and replace them with embalming fluid. This is one of the biggest misconceptions of the embalming process.

Quoting GOCAPS16 (Reply 14):
but do you use glue to close the eyes together? any other areas too?

Yes. Also to close the mouth.

Quoting GOCAPS16 (Reply 14):
I noticed on his hands felt like and looked like clay or artificial skin

This is somewhat normal. The embalming fluids firm up the cells in the skin and the skin can turn somewhat leathery.



Always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
User currently offlineEmiratesA345 From Canada, joined Jun 2003, 2123 posts, RR: 9
Reply 16, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 22 hours ago) and read 10932 times:

I have a friend who explained to me that a man's penis is tied tightly with a string and then stapled up to his stomach. He also mentioned something being done to the ass so that nothing comes out of either end. Is this true?

Disgusting sorry, but curious none the less...

Mark



You and I were meant to fly, Air Canada!
User currently offlineGOCAPS16 From Japan, joined Jan 2000, 4338 posts, RR: 21
Reply 17, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 22 hours ago) and read 10926 times:

oops, he just soiled his $700 tuxedo in his sleep.

Kevin


User currently offlineJet-a gasguy From United States of America, joined Dec 2000, 266 posts, RR: 1
Reply 18, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 17 hours ago) and read 10904 times:

Quoting EmiratesA345 (Reply 16):
I have a friend who explained to me that a man's penis is tied tightly with a string and then stapled up to his stomach. He also mentioned something being done to the ass so that nothing comes out of either end. Is this true?

As an ex-mortuary technician myself, I can tell you that we did tie the males penis tightly with string. However, there was no stapling involved. We also inserted wads of cotton into the anal orifices to prevent seepage.

The bodies never bothered me........but the smells! You just never get use to it.

J-AGG



Find a job you love, and you'll never work a day in your life.
User currently offlineLeroidescieux From United States of America, joined Apr 2005, 28 posts, RR: 0
Reply 19, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 17 hours ago) and read 10897 times:

I have a few questions...
How long can a body go without being embalmed before emitting odor and causing a health hazard?

How are limbs properly positioned after rigor mortis has set in?

Are heads always removed/opened during autopsies to weigh the brain? If so, how is the wound/scar covered so it is not seen?



Wil:The King of the Skies... B747: The Eternal Queen of the Skies
User currently offlineAa777flyer From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 20, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 5 hours ago) and read 10857 times:

At least you will ALWAYS have clientele, never have to really worry about being out of work...

As far as cremation, how long does that take in the oven? How hot does it have to be? Do you embalm those to be creamated?


User currently offlineJake056 From United States of America, joined Mar 2004, 291 posts, RR: 0
Reply 21, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 10838 times:

The Vatican says the Pope's body wasn't embalmed, but "prepared" for viewing. What could that mean? A little make-up? I don't think so given the lenght of time between death and burial.

I think this is truly a great service funeral directors perform. My only personal experience was when my dad died. The funeral director couldn't have been nicer or more sympathetic. The family still agrees years later that he made a sad time so much more bearable. What a nice guy he was.


User currently offlinePlanespotterx From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 22, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 10828 times:

A few questions I have

Why cant someone just die and then be buried, whats this Embalming thing about, why not just bury them straight away.

Also if your non-religious and want to be buried facing south what sort of place/church would I best be asking.


User currently offlineJake056 From United States of America, joined Mar 2004, 291 posts, RR: 0
Reply 23, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 10819 times:

In NY the body can't be displayed for viewing unless it has been embalmed. Embalming has to do with seeing the body after death. If not embalmed it will decay real fast, so a health issue (not to mention unpleasant!!). The viewing thing is cultural/religious. Either you believe in it or you don't. No big deal, just cultures doing things differently. In some Jewish traditions, for example, burial has to take place within 24 hours so embalming is not an issue.

User currently offlineJAGflyer From Canada, joined Aug 2004, 3495 posts, RR: 4
Reply 24, posted (9 years 3 months 3 weeks 1 day 2 hours ago) and read 10800 times:

Quoting Jake056 (Reply 23):

I can field this question:

Modern reform/conservative jewish tradition is for the burial to be ASAP. Orthodox (very religious ones with the black coats, beards and hats) tradition is burial must be done within 24 hours unless the death occured between sundown on friday and sundown on saturday.

Jewish funerals are always burials. Jewish law prohibits any kind of altering off the body. No embalming or cremation. Even for transport they are exempt from having to embalm even if the country's law says all travelling bodies must be embalmed. Autopsys are not preformed unless absolutly nessesary (ie. suspection of murder or abuse causing the death) There is no wake or viewing in a jewish funeral/burial service. The only people that see the body are are the "shomers" (see below) and sometimes the family of the deceased. (This was the case in my grandfather's death. He went out shopping, had a heart attack and then died a day later in hospital. My grandmother never saw him since he left to go shopping and she wanted to say goodbye).

Jewish law also states that caskets must not have ANY metal parts. Most jewish funeral homes sell fancy ones with metal handles/screws but they are not considered kosher (and they cost $10K). Reform/Conservative jews buy wooden caskets with no metal. Some choose ones which are stained or have carved out symbols on them. Orthodox jews buy caskets that are as basic as possible. They usually buy the cheapest ones ($500?) which are basically just wooden crates. It is not because they are cheap, it is because they believe in a simple burial.

Deceased jewish men are buried only wrapped in their "talit" (prayer shawl) and jewish women are buried wraped only is a silk garment. During the time between preperation of the body (undressing and wrapping in talit or silk garment) a people called "Shomers" stay with the body while it is in the casket and say prayers until the body is transported to the cemetary for burial.

That's basically a jewish burial explaination there. I can go into more details about the actual burial ceremonies and the after-burial period of mouring but I don't bore you. (unless you ask me to explain it).

Hope this gives you a good idea.

[Edited 2005-04-07 01:37:15]

[Edited 2005-04-07 01:41:22]


Support the beer and soda can industry, recycle old airplanes!
25 Mirrodie : What do you think of the job they did on the Pope's embalming? check cnn.com for reference photos Also, thanks for shedding light on a very interestin
26 Yu138086 : Question... How much does it cost to administer funeral services to somebody (i.e. bury somebody) in a coffin vs. creamation vs. other options, if any
27 TheGov : Answers, more answers Tied only when needed (i.e. leaking). No stapling. And the anus and vagina are "plugged" only when need be also. They are plugge
28 Atrude777 : Thought I d share a frightening story, this is another oen of those I heard it form so and so.. but basically i heard it from my cousins's g/f whos au
29 KFLLCFII : Question....What brings you to Airliners.net?
30 JAGflyer : I'm no embalmer but I have a hard time believing that is a true story. Dead bodies don't usually "reject" things.[Edited 2005-04-08 15:24:23]
31 Pope : Back to the Pope - Pardon the crudeness, but if he hasn't been embalmed doesn't it stand to reason that the body began to stink in the last 6 days? Wh
32 AGC525 : I'm sure they used a ton of perfumes and fragrances.
33 TheGov : Sorry to disappoint you Atrude777, but in 10 years of doing this and working with embalmers with 20+ years of experience, this has never happened to a
34 Post contains images Klaus : I´m pretty sure JP2 deliberately chose the natural course of events to happen with his body. It´s only fitting after the relentless way he subjected
35 Atrude777 : Why would it be mentioned in mags? I wouldn't want that mentioned, it is a a horrible experience to go through and I would not want it in magazines.
36 Sabena332 : Ever did something "funny" or macabre with your hearse? The parents of a buddy of mine own a funeral home. A few years ago we had to use their hearse
37 AJBUS300 : and it looks like he only got one shot at it!....what a shame!....lol, just had to. Thanks for answering my question and I am back with another. How
38 Lemmy : I've got an uncle who's an undertaker, and it's always been such a comfort to have family funerals at his place. Having my older cousin lock me in a c
39 TheGov : Thanks. It's all about squelching rumors and getting the truth out there. To be quite honest, I have only seen "Six Feet Under" once and then only th
40 Captoveur : All I can think of here is Queen: "Another one Bites the dust".. Play it loud with the windows down. I guess thats why I am not a funeral director.
41 TheGov : I have to be very careful when "Bohemian Rhapsody" comes on. I tend to do a "Wayne's World". And "Radar Love" gets me too.
42 Post contains images GOCAPS16 : TheGov, very interesting profession, I think...What do you know about having public tours of a funeral home? I'd love to witness how this embalming pr
43 Yu138086 : I've heard of instances where bodies are exhumed/ removed from the ground after some time to make space for another persons body. This is done without
44 SmithAir747 : Are European-style coffins available in the USA? By that, I mean the 6-sided wooden coffins that are common in England, Ireland, and other European co
45 SmithAir747 : Speaking of funeral parlours, my large family has lived in a former funeral home since 1978 (when I was 3). Built in the 1850s, this house has 2 floor
46 TheGov : We gladly give tours to anyone who would like to see the funeral home. We have nothing to hide. Unfortunately, that is not generally possible. While
47 57AZ : Actually, it's only illegal here in the states (excepting New Orleans). There are some parts of the world where this is common practice due to the po
48 AJBUS300 : I think I would rather live in a shack or hell, homeless for that matter before living in an ex-funeral parlous house. I dont think I could sleep at
49 AGC525 : If your cremated or put into one of those crypts like in New Orleans, what happens to the very expensive casket?
50 Dan2002 : How much do you get paid? -Dan
51 TheGov : If you are cremated, the casket is burned as well. As for New Orleans, I have been told that they only sell wooden caskets there. Over time, they wil
52 StevenUhl777 : Hmmm...fascinating, but morbid as well! But, a part of the overall process of living and dying. During the years when I was in college, I worked durin
53 Flybyguy : The Gov, Aren't caskets placed into a concrete case that is sealed before the grave is filled? When I saw detective documentaries showing footage of a
54 StevenUhl777 : Yes...you're right...I remember now there being a concrete vault that's put in the grave first, and then a concrete lid on top of that after the cask
55 Garnetpalmetto : TheGov: Is the funeral home you work at a family owner business or is it owned by a large company like SCI?
56 TheGov : Not always. It depends on the cemetery. Some cemeteries do not require an outside container (burial vault, grave liner, etc.) so only a casket goes i
57 GOCAPS16 : Very interesting! I've witnessed both of my uncle's casket being lowered into the vault. As requested by the NOK, certain high valuable items were on
58 Sabena332 : TheGov, thanks for your reply and thanks also for this interesting thread! Who will get the flag at the funeral? Let's say we have the following case:
59 Garnetpalmetto : As a follow-up then, what's your opinion of companies like SCI? I know one of Columbia's best-known funeral homes and it's accompanying cemetary were
60 TheGov : The wife is entitled to the flag. If the soldier did not have a spouse, then we generally defer to the family members remaining with our suggestion t
61 NWADC9 : I have a question, WHY ARE CASKETS SO FREAKIN' HEAVY!?!?!??!?!??!?!? I was a pallbearer for my great-grandmother's wedding in Detroit, and even though
62 TheGov : Well, it depends on what they are made of, actually. I suspect the range of weight for caksets is anywhere from 200 lbs (light steel) to 400 lbs (sol
63 NWADC9 : CRAP! I messed up! I meant funeral! FUNERAL!
64 JAGflyer : I know there are many styles of caskets available at funeral homes but do you just carry one size on hand or do you have to order each seperatly and y
65 Post contains images Klaus : Six Feet Under actually dealt with quite a few of those questions... So far at least I haven´t spotted any inconsistencies...
66 Post contains images TheGov : We basically carry one size of casket at our funeral home. The interior dimensions of the caskets we sell may vary from casket to casket by a couple
67 Post contains images Klaus : TheGov: Now if there were/are inconsistencies, who are you going to believe? Television or the real thing? TV of course... Isn´t everything true they
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