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Ever Been Homeless?  
User currently offlineSunking737 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 2036 posts, RR: 8
Posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 16 hours ago) and read 1275 times:

As anyone here ever been homeless. I mean you live in a motel because you can not afford to pay rent? I know of a family who is looking at being homeless.

They are not idiots, the dad works is but off at work, the mom is trying to work but hates her job doing fast food, as she has no post high school education. They always put the kids first, they make sure they have food, clothes. They don't take vacations, go to movies very much. Cheaper to wait until the movie comes out in DVD.

They don't drink, smoke, or do drugs. They just love their kids and are having a very hard time right now.

The dad makes about $12.00 hr. I feel so sorry for them. But it looks like they will have to move out of the home they have and start living in a motel, as they do not have any family to move in with. They have a large family of 7.

All I ask for is please pray for this family has they are going through some very hard times.


Just an MSPAVGEEK
43 replies: All unread, showing first 25:
 
User currently offlineWhyWhyZed From Canada, joined Jan 2005, 914 posts, RR: 17
Reply 1, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 14 hours ago) and read 1261 times:

I have sympathy for the family you know, but in all honestly, did they really need to have that many children? That's alot, and I'm sure they knew the finances were getting tight after the second or third child! Also, How old are the kids, can they not start working and help...even A paper route would help!

I don't mean to offend, and its definitely better that they're trying to work and have the dignity, instead of mooching off the government. But I never could understand these types of families. The one's you can see on TV are another example.

Just my opinion  Sad
But once again, I will keep them in my prayers...
- Jason DePodesta


User currently offlineOYRJA From Denmark, joined Feb 2007, 78 posts, RR: 15
Reply 2, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 14 hours ago) and read 1259 times:

Quoting Sunking737 (Thread starter):
As anyone here ever been homeless. I mean you live in a motel because you can not afford to pay rent? I know of a family who is looking at being homeless.

Stupid question here..... How is it that they can afford to stay at a motel but not pay their rent?
That must be a cheap motel then. And do they have a kitchen in the room in that motel?


User currently offlineNYCFlyer From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 1387 posts, RR: 10
Reply 3, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 1244 times:

Quoting WhyWhyZed (Reply 1):
I have sympathy for the family you know, but in all honestly, did they really need to have that many children?

I hate to sound cruel, but I agree with WhyWhyZed. If they do not have much money, why on earth did they have five children? The family you speak of is not on public assistance (at least you didn't mention it; perhaps they are), but I get very frustrated with single mothers or families with an excessive number of children who need the public's support to care for their own. My parents wanted more, but stopped at two children because they knew that was what they could afford, if they wanted to live in Manhattan.

I realize my mini-rant is off-topic, and I certainly do feel terrible for any hard-working person who can't make their rent. But my sympathy is limited due to the large number of children.


User currently offlineDL021 From United States of America, joined May 2004, 11446 posts, RR: 76
Reply 4, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 1240 times:
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Ok... while I feel some sympathy, they are in the situation they put themselves into....

the father needs to either find one job he's comfortable with, or get two full time jobs. Mom needs to keep whatever she's doing whether she likes it or not. They took on the responsibility and they need to meet it.



Is my Pan Am ticket to the moon still good?
User currently offlineDtwclipper From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 5, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 1231 times:

Quoting OYRJA (Reply 2):
Stupid question here..... How is it that they can afford to stay at a motel but not pay their rent?
That must be a cheap motel then. And do they have a kitchen in the room in that motel?

To get an apartment you need 1st months rent + a security deposit, and often deposits with the utility companies.

This is often the biggest obstacle.


User currently offlineSunking737 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 2036 posts, RR: 8
Reply 6, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 1225 times:

Their rent is $1,025 a month, plus $70.00 a month for water/sewer, $150 a month for power/ natural gas, $75 a month for telephone, $ 500.00 a month for food. Gas for car $ 200.00.

They have no charge cards, pay cash as they go. The motel would be around $200 a week. They would cook with a small microwave or have sandwiches.

They have to have a 4 br home as many places only allow 2 people per bedroom.

2 kids can work but, education is very important, and school is not out for the summer yet.

They are not on welfare, The number of kids has nothing to do with it. It is the high cost of renting or owning a home. Company's are not paying good wages any more, or they have to give up money to keep the company out of bankruptcy.

The dad has worked for an airline for the last 3 years, and they did not get a raise this year because the company broke even. But the union people got their raise.



Just an MSPAVGEEK
User currently offlineDL021 From United States of America, joined May 2004, 11446 posts, RR: 76
Reply 7, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 13 hours ago) and read 1223 times:
Support Airliners.net - become a First Class Member!

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 6):
The number of kids has nothing to do with it



Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 6):
They have to have a 4 br home as many places only allow 2 people per bedroom.

These two statements contradict each other. The number of kids seems to directly affect their ability to afford housing. I guarantee that it impacts their ability to manage a food and clothing budget.

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 6):
Their rent is $1,025 a month, plus $70.00 a month for water/sewer, $150 a month for power/ natural gas, $75 a month for telephone, $ 500.00 a month for food. Gas for car $ 200.00.

I would bet that a more affordable apartment could be found, and they need to get the older kids to work a part-time job to help out. You can put this many kids in a two bedroom apartment until times get a little easier by having kids sleep in the den/living room as well as stacking up in the second bedroom.

Not a really happy situation, but this is a doable deal. People around the world live in far less happy circumstances.

Life won't be easy for these folks, so what I would do if I were you is to look for solutions for them.



Is my Pan Am ticket to the moon still good?
User currently offlineOzGuy From Australia, joined Apr 2005, 392 posts, RR: 13
Reply 8, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 12 hours ago) and read 1209 times:

I'd never wish my families wealth away but it's always hard to hear these stories about other people in such desperation. I have a bucket load of sympathy for them but again, I'll agree with the others in saying that surely a condom could have been more cost effective than another kid, just until they got their first kids through school anyway. Sure it's a $1 outlay but savings'll just keep pouring in.

Having said that, I realise that they may not have wanted a disrupted flow of kids if they were planning a large family. My parents worked out before I was born that they could live well and retire well if they had two kids, but they also wanted to have kids fairly close together so we'd be closer/have similar schools etc. and that they wanted to be young enough to enjoy retirement without kids so they decided to have Me when Dad was just 22 and my sister at 24. I'm sure they struggled for a couple of years but now we live really well and they're well on their way to their early retirement goal. They were lucky that they both come from Wealthy families but I'm sure this family you are talking about will make it through to.

Sunking, one thing, you seem to know a lot about their situation and this situation is very close to your heart, it's not your family is it? sorry if it sounds stupid but you sound like a guy I once knew who posted the same sought of information on a board as "a friend" who was actually just desperate for any advice he could get.

Thinking of the family,
OzGuy

p.s. If education is a big thing I know for a fact that there are fast food joints like maccas that will give students like one shift a week, maybe Friday night or something for 4-5 hours. in Aus that's about $40 pw, two kids on that each giving half there pay would more than makeup the difference on the rent for the house and save moving costs, and they'd still have a little extra each to spend on themselves for their effort....just a thought...


User currently offlineSunking737 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 2036 posts, RR: 8
Reply 9, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 12 hours ago) and read 1198 times:

Thanks for all the input. When they stated having kids, they talked about it,and thought things would get better job wise but never did. The dad wanted to return to school but was never able to.

The oldest son will be working very soon,(full time) and so will the next oldest son.(part time) Many places will not let a large family into a 2br apartment.

They even tried to buy a home but they were just below the income levels to get a loan.

They are very loving people, and stay to themselves. They have not caused trouble with anyone including law enforcement.

The dad was injured on the job 2 years ago and missed work for 6mos, and they are still trying to get back on their feet, from that. It will be an on going medical condition for the rest of his life.



Just an MSPAVGEEK
User currently offlineBaylorAirBear From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 2913 posts, RR: 50
Reply 10, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 11 hours ago) and read 1176 times:

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 6):
Their rent is $1,025 a month, plus $70.00 a month for water/sewer, $150 a month for power/ natural gas, $75 a month for telephone, $ 500.00 a month for food. Gas for car $ 200.00.

It sounds like the dad's pay would cover rent and then some at $12/hr. The mother's job should be able to take up the slack even flipping burgers. I do empathize with them, but they're just going to have to work their butts off unless they are willing to sell a baby or two.

BaylorAirBear



I'm just skipping stones...
User currently offlineSunking737 From United States of America, joined Feb 2005, 2036 posts, RR: 8
Reply 11, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 8 hours ago) and read 1135 times:

Sell the kids we are talking about here in the US, people don't sell the kids.

Over half of his pay goes towards the rent, and etc.

Boy I thought you guys would come up an idea on how to help this family. I sure was wrong.

You guys think you have it easy, you can always find someone who is in worse shape. Just go to the county court's and sit and hear some of the cases.

I get down on my knees every night and pray that people like these can find a way to solve their problems.

I guess it everyone for them selves in this world. Don't help your fellow man, just run his ass over when he is down.



Just an MSPAVGEEK
User currently offlineKaiGywer From United States of America, joined Oct 2003, 12201 posts, RR: 35
Reply 12, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 7 hours ago) and read 1118 times:
AIRLINERS.NET CREW
FORUM MODERATOR

Sunking, I see that you are from MSP. If this family is also from MN, have they looked into Section 8 housing? Granted, it might not be the best neighborhoods, but many nice neighborhoods also allow Section 8. Also, moving out of MSP and into rural areas would be wise in many ways. Rural areas are better for the kids, and housing is cheap. When my inlaws moved to DLH for a year, they rented out their six bedroom house for $450/month. This was on 5 acre farm, with two garages, barn and shed, as well as LOTS of space outside. Of course moving out of the metro means they have to find new jobs and schools, but if neither is happy in their current jobs anyways, wouldn't that just be to the better? The kids, while not fun at first, will probably like a rural area, as they have all the room they want to be loud and play outside without anybody complaining.


911, where is your emergency?
User currently offlineEmiratesA345 From Canada, joined Jun 2003, 2123 posts, RR: 9
Reply 13, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 1084 times:

Quoting Sunking737 (Thread starter):
I know of a family who is looking at being homeless.

What they should be looking at is a way not to end up homeless.

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 6):
The dad has worked for an airline for the last 3 years, and they did not get a raise this year because the company broke even.

We all know airlines don't pay very well unless you're in management or a pilot. He may love his job, but he needs to change. I'm 18, have found a government job which to some, is pretty degrading, but it pays well. Next year, I'll even have benefits and as I said it is a government position so the benefits are second to none.

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
Boy I thought you guys would come up an idea on how to help this family. I sure was wrong.

I don't mean to sound uncompassionate but its not our responsibility to think of ways to help this family. As adults, the parents here should have thought of ways to NOT get themselves into this situation. One way would have been by not having so many kids.

Mark



You and I were meant to fly, Air Canada!
User currently offline777236ER From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 14, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 1056 times:

Nope, never. There are no circumstances at all where it could happen.

Signed,
Lucky people.


User currently offlineRedngold From United States of America, joined Mar 2000, 6907 posts, RR: 45
Reply 15, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 1048 times:

Thousands of us live every day only one paycheck away from being homeless. Right now I am in an even more precarious situation than normal due to high medical bills.

People shouldn't look down on each other just because one or another is homeless. Know the reasons behind it, and even then, you shouldn't judge whether they "deserve it" or not.

As for having five children - you made your bed, now sleep in it. What should they do, put their children up for adoption? Abandon them? This family is a family of seven, and they have to work with that. Why bother criticising them for something they cannot change?


redngold



Up, up and away!
User currently offlineGreyhound From United States of America, joined Mar 2005, 1026 posts, RR: 2
Reply 16, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 1045 times:

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 6):
Their rent is $1,025 a month, plus $70.00 a month for water/sewer, $150 a month for power/ natural gas, $75 a month for telephone, $ 500.00 a month for food. Gas for car $ 200.00.

They have no charge cards, pay cash as they go. The motel would be around $200 a week. They would cook with a small microwave or have sandwiches.

What about medical expenses? Is the whole family covered, just the children, or noone? Those costs may not be there in front of you immediately, but they can crush you quicker than $1000 for rent will. Or unexpected medical costs could put them in a "what bill do I pay now" situation.

Quoting Sunking737 (Thread starter):
the mom is trying to work but hates her job doing fast food,

Still admirable for doing a job she doesn't like or want to help out. I've seen too many people, no matter what the situation is, refuse a job unless it pays $15 an hour.



29th, Let's Go!
User currently offlineGreyhound From United States of America, joined Mar 2005, 1026 posts, RR: 2
Reply 17, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 1038 times:

Quoting EmiratesA345 (Reply 13):
I don't mean to sound uncompassionate but its not our responsibility to think of ways to help this family

Our responsibility, no. But if someone speeds and gets in a crash, would you say it's their fault they were driving fast? It's not your responsibility to help them out of the car wreck, but I doubt you would just watch the person burn. That person could be you.

Quoting EmiratesA345 (Reply 13):
One way would have been by not having so many kids.

I agree, but not fully since I don't know their EXACT situation. Maybe when they started having kids they were better off. What if I was a millionaire, and my wife and I had 6 kids (no, btw, I'm not implying this guy used to be one). Then I lost my millions, and I wound up in the same situation as this guy. Would it be my fault because I had so many kids then? If I instead had kids AFTER times got rough, then no, you're right, I wouldn't be helping my situation any.



29th, Let's Go!
User currently offlineBaylorAirBear From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 2913 posts, RR: 50
Reply 18, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 5 hours ago) and read 1037 times:

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
people don't sell the kids

No shit...

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
Over half of his pay goes towards the rent, and etc

It doesn't matter if 100% goes toward rent, the fact remains that there IS enough money to pay the bills. I appreciate that they may be trying to save money, but $125 by living in a hotel isn't a good compromise.

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
I guess it everyone for them selves in this world. Don't help your fellow man, just run his ass over when he is down.

Who said that?!? We are offering solutions and compassion. Don't ignore
what you don't want to hear.

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
I get down on my knees every night and pray that people like these can find a way to solve their problems.

Is that all that you can manage? Have you offered any assistance?

BaylorAirBear
Livin' Large



I'm just skipping stones...
User currently offlineGreyhound From United States of America, joined Mar 2005, 1026 posts, RR: 2
Reply 19, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 4 hours ago) and read 1032 times:

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 18):
We are offering solutions and compassion

Maybe a little lacking on the compassion in a couple of the posts. Especially if the only "solution" is just that they shouldn't have had so many kids. You know, coulda woulda shoulda.

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 18):
but $125 by living in a hotel isn't a good compromise.

I agree. Why would someone want to live in a hotel if they absolutely didn't have to.

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 18):
Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
I get down on my knees every night and pray that people like these can find a way to solve their problems.

Is that all that you can manage? Have you offered any assistance?

About as much assistance, I'm guessing, as everyone else here. What about your offers of assistance? After all, you stated "We are offering solutions and compassion". I don't have much to offer. I have no jobs or any significant amount of money to offer them. But if someone feels that at least a prayer will help those people, then why not?



29th, Let's Go!
User currently offlineUAL747 From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 20, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 4 hours ago) and read 1018 times:

I have a feeling that perhaps their credit isn't very good as well, seeing as most utility companies do not make you pay a deposit unless your credit is less than par.

Secondly, I really do not see how staying in a hotel room is effecient either. Hotels are much more expensive than rent for an apartment or even a home in some areas. Secondly, many hotels charge per guest. I doubt a family of 7 can get by with, "We are having an extra few guest tonight, can we have 5 roll-away beds?" I think the hotel staff might notice.

I feel sorry for them, but there are MANY things that they could have done to prevent the situation they are in now. Better financial planning would be a start.

UAL


User currently offlineIowaman From United States of America, joined May 2004, 4358 posts, RR: 6
Reply 21, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 3 hours ago) and read 1004 times:
AIRLINERS.NET CREW
FORUM MODERATOR

Quoting WhyWhyZed (Reply 1):
I have sympathy for the family you know, but in all honestly, did they really need to have that many children? That's alot, and I'm sure they knew the finances were getting tight after the second or third child! Also, How old are the kids, can they not start working and help...even A paper route would help!

BINGO! That pretty well sums everything up. The kids need to get jobs. I even have a job at 15 part time at the newspaper. And I don't know the whole situation either but maybe they shouldn't have had all the kids if they couldn't of afforded it.

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
Over half of his pay goes towards the rent, and etc.

What happens to all the other money?

Quoting Sunking737 (Thread starter):
They don't take vacations, go to movies very much. Cheaper to wait until the movie comes out in DVD.

If they can afford DVD's then I think that money should go towards rent. Go to a public library and check them out at little to no cost. We check out movies there all the time because they are free and why buy it when you only watch it a few times?

Quoting Sunking737 (Thread starter):
the mom is trying to work but hates her job doing fast food, as she has no post high school education.

Well, a lot of people hate there job. It's good she is sticking with it.



Next flights: WN DSM-LAS-PHX, US PHX-SJD. Return: US SJD-PHX, WN PHX-MDW-DSM
User currently offlineBaylorAirBear From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 2913 posts, RR: 50
Reply 22, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 3 hours ago) and read 983 times:

Quoting Greyhound (Reply 19):
What about your offers of assistance?

I do agree with you. I choose not to offer assistance to them. I don't want to watch someone burn, as you say, but you have to pick your battles. However, I feel that Sunking's blanket statement was unfair. I'm not going to do nothing, and then speak poorly of those who do the like. I know my shit stinks.

BaylorAirBear



I'm just skipping stones...
User currently offlineWhyWhyZed From Canada, joined Jan 2005, 914 posts, RR: 17
Reply 23, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days 3 hours ago) and read 982 times:

Can I ask another question which will give alot of people the answers to a couple statements. How old is the youngest child?

Also don't get me wrong, I do have sympathy for this family. Also, I don't exaclty have a wealthy life myself, and iI too have major problems of my own, at only the age of 17.

- Jason DePodesta


User currently offlineAvek00 From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 4336 posts, RR: 19
Reply 24, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 2 days ago) and read 941 times:

Quoting Sunking737 (Reply 11):
Sell the kids we are talking about here in the US, people don't sell the kids.

Then the youngest 2-3 children should be given up for adoption to a more sensible set of parents who will give them a much better life than the biological parents could ever accomplish.



Live life to the fullest.
25 Post contains links Bezoar : Many people are skirting homelessness on a daily basis. The number is impossible to determine, as some folks have kind friends, family, and neighbors
26 Post contains images Vaporlock : Sunking, I know it is hard for some of us to understand the situation your friends are in. But it is real and it happens to families every day. Most
27 Sunking737 : Thanks to everyone for giving your point of view. The 3 youngest children are 13, 11, & 7. I would not have them give the kids up for adoption. It wou
28 Gladave : sunking, i cn only help with a few $'s over paypal but if you are interested let me know via PM i do feel sorry for these peopls, i know a few friends
29 Post contains links KaiGywer : Of course that is expensive. You get all the city folks who wants to live on a farm, but still be able to commute to the cities. Move down to souther
30 Sunking737 : KaiGywer the problem with living in Fairmont is the drive to MSP would take several hours just to go to work.
31 KaiGywer : That is true. Then how about RST? See if a transfer is possible...unless the company in question is SY... There are other jobs though, if they aren't
32 Avek00 : Then the couple is unwilling to take the painful reforms necessary to successfully restructure the family's financial situation.
33 LAS757300 : What kind of nutcase are you? Jesus, this family has had some difficult times and your solution is to give up the kids. Maybe he should sell one of h
34 FlyingTexan : They are close to homeless - Even the working poor, who live paycheck to paycheck, are a long way from homeless. Even the *middle class* are living pa
35 Avek00 : No, the solution was to never have that many da*ned kids in the first place in the absence of a guaranteed million dollars in the bank. This alternat
36 Yu138086 : Actually their situation is not so bad.. Emotionally, it may be tough but financially they are not in debt (I assume) since they pay their way with ca
37 Wukka : Whew. I was getting ready to post my sob story about one day having an 80k job, getting laid off, losing my house, sucking up on 140k of medical bills
38 Sunking737 : Thanks to all who posted good wishes. They will pull through. They are making some changes which will pan out over the next few weeks.
39 Luv2fly : Sunking737 everyone should have a friend like yourself and your family.
40 Atrude777 : It is times like these where I need to shut up, and stop complaining, the heat is off or the cold air is too cold. I am sitting here in a nice comfort
41 JAGflyer : Although I feel sorrow for them I have to say that if they are this unstable financially they should not have had 5 children. Children cost money and
42 Sunking737 : If anyone wants to help my friends out just go to my profile and go to my web page, for more information. Thanks to everyone, Sunking737
43 Sunking737 : I would like to thank the people who have helped my friends so far.
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