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Cornish Promoted To Senior Tea Maker  
User currently offlinePe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 19230 posts, RR: 52
Posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1195 times:

Cornish, our much-loved contributor, has just been appointed Senior Tea Maker.

The beast, of Cornish origins, was previously Assistant Tea Maker and General No-Hoper.

We must all praise him for his effort and wish him all the best in the future.

Well done, Cornish!

James.

P.S. 'Senior Aviation Economist' sounds better.  Smile


"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."
23 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 1, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1190 times:

Excuse me - that's "Senior Tea AND Coffee Maker" James.


errr - thanks for letting the masses know....



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlinePe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 19230 posts, RR: 52
Reply 2, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1190 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 1):
that's "Senior Tea AND Coffee Maker" James.

Damn! Always forget that one. Doesn't quite have the same ring.  Smile



"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."
User currently offlineJasepl From India, joined Jul 2004, 3582 posts, RR: 39
Reply 3, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1189 times:

Ooooh! Congratulations Cornish! Sounds very glamorous!  Smile That's one less thing to worry about for that future seaside cafe!


What about you, young James? Still stuck at the bottom of the chain and reduced to sucking on used tea bags for nourishment? Is it Tips or Tetley that Patrick so graciously saves for you?  Wink


User currently offlinePe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 19230 posts, RR: 52
Reply 4, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1179 times:

Quoting Jasepl (Reply 3):
What about you, young James? Still stuck at the bottom of the chain and reduced to sucking on used tea bags for nourishment? Is it Tips or Tetley that Patrick so graciously saves for you?

I have to settle for tea without milk or sugar - or tea. I have to drink it out of a rolled-up newspaper.



"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."
User currently offlineGVBIG From United Kingdom, joined Nov 2004, 341 posts, RR: 0
Reply 5, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1176 times:

Congrats Cornish  bigthumbsup 

As for Pe@rson, someone told me he cleans the toilets in McDonalds.



Booked it, Packed it, f*cked off!
User currently offlinePe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 19230 posts, RR: 52
Reply 6, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1172 times:

Quoting GVBIG (Reply 5):
As for Pe@rson, someone told me he cleans the toilets in McDonalds.

Clean toilets? I can but aim for such a nice position.



"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."
User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 7, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1161 times:

Quoting GVBIG (Reply 5):
As for Pe@rson, someone told me he cleans the toilets in McDonalds.

nope. he's assistant deputy burger flipper Big grin

Quoting GVBIG (Reply 5):
Congrats Cornish

Thanks !



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlineGVBIG From United Kingdom, joined Nov 2004, 341 posts, RR: 0
Reply 8, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1157 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 7):
Quoting GVBIG (Reply 5):
Congrats Cornish

Thanks !

I didn't mean it by the way. I truly hope you get sacked soon  Wink



Booked it, Packed it, f*cked off!
User currently offlinePe@rson From United Kingdom, joined Jan 2001, 19230 posts, RR: 52
Reply 9, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1155 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 7):
nope. he's assistant deputy burger flipper

LOL. Again, I can but aim for such a demanding, delightful position, although they said, after I applied, that I was insufficiently qualified for such a role: apparently you must have a PhD in astrophysics.



"Everyone writing for the Telegraph knows that the way to grab eyeballs is with Ryanair and/or sex."
User currently offlineJasepl From India, joined Jul 2004, 3582 posts, RR: 39
Reply 10, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 6 hours ago) and read 1152 times:

Quoting Pe@rson (Reply 4):
I have to settle for tea without milk or sugar - or tea. I have to drink it out of a rolled-up newspaper.

Inexcusable! That's far more than you deserve.


User currently offlineBA380 From United Kingdom, joined May 2004, 1466 posts, RR: 8
Reply 11, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 3 hours ago) and read 1128 times:

If you are a) senior tea and coffee maker and b) going to travel regularly to Ecuador, Turkey and Singapore, then I fear your emplyer could potentially explore some cost-cutting measures. When you go on these jaunts, do you research effects of differing water softness/hardness on tea/coffee?


cabin crew: doors to automatic and cross-check...
User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 12, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 3 hours ago) and read 1126 times:

Quoting BA380 (Reply 11):
When you go on these jaunts, do you research effects of differing water softness/hardness on tea/coffee?

Errr - no. I just dunk the teabag a few times Big grin



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlineBA380 From United Kingdom, joined May 2004, 1466 posts, RR: 8
Reply 13, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 3 hours ago) and read 1123 times:

do you need a (tea) bag-carrier on the long-haul trips?


cabin crew: doors to automatic and cross-check...
User currently offline7LBAC111 From United Kingdom, joined Jul 2004, 2566 posts, RR: 35
Reply 14, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 3 hours ago) and read 1117 times:

Yes Cornish - I will add to my already personal congratulations, with a very public WELL DONE SIR

Ah go on. Go on go on go on go on go on go on. Ah you will. You will ya will ya will ya will ya will!

Mark

Cornish is now officially Mrs Doyle.

[Edited 2005-08-05 18:12:02]


Debate is what you put on de hook when you want to catch de fish.
User currently offlineBristolFlyer From United Kingdom, joined May 2004, 2297 posts, RR: 0
Reply 15, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 4 days 3 hours ago) and read 1115 times:

Well done. Now mines milk with none, thanks.

BF



Fortune favours the brave
User currently offlineJGPH1A From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 16, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 3 days 11 hours ago) and read 1092 times:

Quoting 7LBAC111 (Reply 14):
Cornish is now officially Mrs Doyle.

 rotfl  The resemblance is quite uncanny !



Congratulations Cornish - welcome to the rarified heights of mid-level semi-custodial junior grade management. When do you get the key to the Executive Hobnob Tin ?


User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 17, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 1 day 6 hours ago) and read 1056 times:

Quoting 7LBAC111 (Reply 14):
Cornish is now officially Mrs Doyle.

Thanks for that. Will you have another cup of tea now Mark. Ah go on.... etc, etc.

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 16):
When do you get the key to the Executive Hobnob Tin ?

They've already giving it to me as a signing on bonus - and better still, they're chocolate coated hob-nobs  yummy 

Quoting BA380 (Reply 13):
do you need a (tea) bag-carrier on the long-haul trips?

Improved quality tea on ALL airline flights will be high on my agenda  Silly



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlineAirEuropeUK733 From United Kingdom, joined Apr 2004, 978 posts, RR: 10
Reply 18, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 1043 times:

Well done again Mr Cornish - as I have said to you before.

I wasn't aware of the Tea and Coffee part (I thought you had lined ME up for that job!) - do you think you could stretch to a few scones and donuts  Wink

AE733



It's nice to fly with friends
User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 19, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 1040 times:

Quoting AirEuropeUK733 (Reply 18):
wasn't aware of the Tea and Coffee part (I thought you had lined ME up for that job!) - do you think you could stretch to a few scones and donuts

Well if Pe@rson's your competition, you've got no worries AE733 Big grin

Hmm - scones with CORNISH clotted cream of course. Donuts too - not sure which, maybe different every day: Mondays Jam, Tuesdays Apple, Wednesdays Custard, etc, etc  yummy 

No expense spared on my fat businessman's account  Wink



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlineAirEuropeUK733 From United Kingdom, joined Apr 2004, 978 posts, RR: 10
Reply 20, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 1032 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 19):
Hmm - scones with CORNISH clotted cream of course. Donuts too - not sure which, maybe different every day: Mondays Jam, Tuesdays Apple, Wednesdays Custard, etc, etc

Yeah but remember which county the 'Pride of the WestCountry' is in  

Quoting Cornish (Reply 19):
No expense spared on my fat businessman's account

You'll be flying Rubberband Airlines in row Z mark my words   On a serious note I hear that the cargo hold isn't actually THAT bad!

AE733

[Edit-typo]

[Edited 2005-08-08 17:14:34]


It's nice to fly with friends
User currently offlineCornish From United Kingdom, joined Feb 2005, 8187 posts, RR: 54
Reply 21, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 1029 times:

Quoting AirEuropeUK733 (Reply 20):
You'll be flying Rubberband Airlines in row Z mark my words

No. I'll never fly Ryanair ever - They'll have to drag me kicking and screaming  Wink



Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
User currently offlineSkidmarks From UK - England, joined Dec 2004, 7121 posts, RR: 55
Reply 22, posted (9 years 1 month 2 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 1026 times:

Have I missed something here? Has Cornish got a job at last? More to the point, has Pe@rson got a job? More questions than answers. I need a cuppa - Cornish, when you're ready mate!! Big grin

And congratulations - for whatever it is you've really done. Big grin

Andy  old 



Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
User currently offlineJGPH1A From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 23, posted (9 years 1 month 1 week 5 days 23 hours ago) and read 993 times:

Quoting Cornish (Reply 19):
Wednesdays Custard, etc, etc

Ewuwuwuw - custard donuts. Time for this week's culinary fatwah ! Custard donuts are pustules on the anal fistula of Beelezebub, and are cursed unto the seventh generation.

Quoting Cornish (Reply 17):
and better still, they're chocolate coated hob-nobs

No no no, clearly you misunderstood your Junior Executive Welcome Pack. Choccy hobnobs are reserved for Senior Management grades and above. You only get plain hobnobs.


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