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Lazy Journalist's Plane Story Generator  
User currently offlineLeezyjet From United Kingdom, joined Oct 2001, 4042 posts, RR: 53
Posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 16 hours ago) and read 1314 times:

Just found this whilst browsing another site.

http://radans.net/jens/planestory.html

What a hoot. Would be cool if it could be made more global though rather than just Australian specific.

 Smile


"She Rolls, 45 knots, 90, 135, nose comes up to 20 degrees, she's airborne - She flies, Concorde Flies"
10 replies: All unread, jump to last
 
User currently offlineTpasxm787 From United States of America, joined Mar 2005, 1730 posts, RR: 19
Reply 1, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 15 hours ago) and read 1304 times:

Bits Fall Off Plane


Tasmanian passengers told of their scared panicked dread aboard a Perth bound Virgin Blue flight which was enforced to return to Darwin yesterday due to explosive decompression.

Some passengers were wounded that the 309 passengers were told few details of the unpleasant incident.

They said the plane 'Cracked in half like a boiled egg that was left in the water too long' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Tupolev A340 landed.

Passenger we can't show you his name, but he is a very scared man last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'It's a good thing I was wearing the brown underwear', the passenger said.



This is the Last Stop.
User currently offlineOmoo From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 2, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 15 hours ago) and read 1288 times:

Flight from Hell

Sydney passengers told of their terrible dreadful fear aboard a Adelaide bound Qantas flight which was advised it was in the best interests of the plane to return to Canberra yesterday due to toilets smelling bad.

Some passengers were bothered that the 196 passengers were told few details of the catastrophe.

They said the plane 'Turned on it's side and flopped like a fish out of water' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Boeing 747 landed.

Passenger we can't show you his name, but he is a very scared man last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'It's a good thing I was wearing the brown underwear', the passenger said.


User currently offlineAsstChiefMark From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 3, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 15 hours ago) and read 1282 times:

Australian passengers told of their terrific horror aboard a Melbourne bound Virgin Blue flight which was required to return to Sydney yesterday due to toilets smelling bad.

Some passengers were distraught that the 36 passengers were told few details of the catastrophe.

They said the plane 'Dropped like a stone and leaned over to the left' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Boeing 737 landed.

Passenger Bruce Goatman last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'The hostess shoved me out of the plane. I landed right on the concrete', the passenger said.


User currently offlineLeanOfPeak From United States of America, joined Oct 2004, 509 posts, RR: 1
Reply 4, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 15 hours ago) and read 1268 times:

Three stories so far and only one has mixed-and-matched make and model. This is highly disappointing.

User currently offlineN229NW From United States of America, joined Sep 2004, 1950 posts, RR: 31
Reply 5, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 14 hours ago) and read 1262 times:

Actually, Tupolev did make the A340 for three months back in 1987, but the program was not a success. Later, attempts failed to sell the aircraft to Western European airlines after the Iron Curtain fell because of the claim that the plane was a direct rip-off from an Airbus model that had not yet been designed.

Also the plane had a tendency to "crack in half like a boiled egg," which sometimes made the toilets smell bad.

[Edited 2005-09-29 20:35:51]


It's people like you what cause unrest!
User currently offlineANITIX87 From United States of America, joined Mar 2005, 3305 posts, RR: 13
Reply 6, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 14 hours ago) and read 1235 times:
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Flight Goes Horribly Wrong


Foreign passengers told of their terror aboard a Melbourne bound Qantas flight which was obliged to return to Sydney yesterday due to a medical emergency.

Some passengers were devastated that the 943 passengers were told few details of the calamity.

They said the plane 'Seemed normal, but everyone knew it was posessed by the Devil' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Airbus 747 landed.

Passenger Bruce Goatman last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'The hostess shoved me out of the plane. I landed right on the concrete', the passenger said.







That's my story...Far better than anything a journalist would ever come up with. I mean, come ON, look how accurate it is!

TIS



www.stellaryear.com: Canon EOS 50D, Canon EOS 5DMkII, Sigma 50mm 1.4, Canon 24-70 2.8L II, Canon 100mm 2.8L, Canon 100-4
User currently offlineTexan From New Zealand, joined Dec 2003, 4278 posts, RR: 52
Reply 7, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 13 hours ago) and read 1227 times:

Terrified Passengers in Dread Flight


Foreign passengers told of their horrific terror aboard a Sydney bound Qantas flight which was told in no uncertain terms to return to Perth yesterday due to explosive decompression.

Some passengers were devastated that the 943 passengers were told few details of the catastrophe.

They said the plane 'Dropped like a stone and leaned over to the left' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Boeing A320 landed.

Passenger Bill Smith last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'The hostess shoved me out of the plane. I landed right on the concrete', the passenger said.



"I have always imagined that Paradise will be a kind of library."
User currently offlineLeezyjet From United Kingdom, joined Oct 2001, 4042 posts, RR: 53
Reply 8, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 10 hours ago) and read 1203 times:

Bits Fall Off Plane


Foreign passengers told of their terrible dreadful fear aboard a Sydney bound Ansett flight which was advised it was in the best interests of the plane to return to Adelaide yesterday due to running out of fuel.

Some passengers were devastated that the 943 passengers were told few details of the unpleasant incident.

They said the plane 'Flew slowly with the engines screaming like Shannon Noll trying to sing' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Airbus 767 landed.

Passenger Nanna Shep last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'I was completely terrified until the wheels touched the ground', the passenger said



"She Rolls, 45 knots, 90, 135, nose comes up to 20 degrees, she's airborne - She flies, Concorde Flies"
User currently offlineDan2002 From United States of America, joined Dec 2002, 2055 posts, RR: 5
Reply 9, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 10 hours ago) and read 1196 times:

Terrified Passengers in Dread Flight


Melbourne passengers told of their scared panicked dread aboard a Sydney bound Qantas flight which was required to return to Melbourne yesterday due to engine failure.

Some passengers were vexed that the 943 passengers were told few details of the calamity.

They said the plane 'Began behaving very oddly' before turning around.

As a precaution, fire trucks were on standby when the Boeing Concorde landed.

Passenger Ms L. Dover last night was still recovering from the ordeal.

'I'll never fly this airline again', the passenger said.


DAn



A guy asks 'What's Punk?'. I kick over a trash can and its punk. He knocks over a trash can and its trendy.
User currently offlineGlydrflyr From United States of America, joined Jan 2005, 207 posts, RR: 0
Reply 10, posted (8 years 11 months 3 weeks 5 days 10 hours ago) and read 1195 times:

I tried to use this form to write a funny story, but the "Journalists" from the New York Times and the National Enquirer were downloading so many blanks that the website overloaded and crashed, flopping around like an editorial without an opinion in it!! Remember, next aircraft mishap, some of these reporters will be jamming this site to get their stories ready for the next edition, so maybe we can help them out by filling in the blanks randomly and e-mailing it to them; they won't know the difference anyway, and we'll get our names in the paper and on TV as "Aviation Experts".


if ya gotta crash, hit something soft and cheap!
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