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"flight Attendants, Prepare For Takeoff..."  
User currently offlineAApilot2b From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 586 posts, RR: 1
Posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 19 hours ago) and read 9305 times:

So here I was, preparing for my first flight on this wonderful aircraft from MD. It was September of 1998, and I was seated in the coach section of an American Airlines MD-11. We had boarded at DFW and this flight (completely full) was soon to takeoff for LGW. Today, we had a direct clearance to the departure runway. There would be no waiting around in long lines. Our path was quick and direct. As we taxied, I noticed that at the front of the coach cabin a small group of flight attendants had formed around the central video device.

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Photo © Brian Peters

Apparently, they were having trouble getting the Safety Video to play. In spite of their efforts, the ____ thing just would not work. As they worked on the monitor, they must have become unaware of the announcement from up front, "flight attendants prepare for takeoff." It was not until our craft had begun to center up on the runway, that one of them noticed the situation. She quickly motioned to the others to be seated, and then started to run to her position at the very back exit. At that same moment, 180,000 lbs of combined thrust came on as our MD-11 began to accelerate down the runway. The laws of physics took over and our poor flight attendant's slight jog became an uncontrolled sprint as the sudden change in momentum forced her towards the back of the plane. Needless to say, she lost her composure for a brief second and cursed one word that had the entire section filled with laughter. Funnily, as the roar of the wheels ceased and we climbed in to a beautiful, calm afternoon sky, the safety video began to play.  Smile
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Do you have a humorous experience to share?

20 replies: All unread, jump to last
User currently offlineAq737 From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 612 posts, RR: 0
Reply 1, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 19 hours ago) and read 9250 times:

Cool Story. Thanks for sharing. Isn't that against FAA regulations? If the FAA found out, would they fine AA? I think that the F/As should have been more vigilent, but nonethe less, very funny!


User currently offlineArtsyman From United States of America, joined Feb 2001, 4748 posts, RR: 32
Reply 2, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 18 hours ago) and read 9232 times:

On a recent BA flight from LGW>CDG, the FA or purser, announced, please be seated for BLAST-OFF....

Are we going to space these days ?


User currently offlineLeezyjet From United Kingdom, joined Oct 2001, 4053 posts, RR: 52
Reply 3, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 18 hours ago) and read 9200 times:

I thought that the purpose of the safety video was so that it was played before take-off, not after, so people know what to do if something goes wrong, as take-off is one of the most critical phases of a flight for an incident to occur. What if something had gone wrong, how would the pax have known what to do ???.
They should have notified the captain of the situation and done a manual demo if the video was not working.

Very unprofessional and potentially dangerous - they should know better.


"She Rolls, 45 knots, 90, 135, nose comes up to 20 degrees, she's airborne - She flies, Concorde Flies"
User currently offlineGoldenshield From United States of America, joined Jan 2001, 6170 posts, RR: 13
Reply 4, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 17 hours ago) and read 9180 times:

Now, I know this doesnt apply world around, but according to the FAA:

Passengers must be advised of use of seatbelts, exits, etc, prior to the aircraft even moving.

This is part 91, Im not sure about 135 or 121.

Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun.
User currently offlineStarFlyer From Germany, joined Sep 2002, 987 posts, RR: 1
Reply 5, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 15 hours ago) and read 9141 times:

I had this happen to me on an Air New Zealand 744 flight...

For some reason the video wouldnt play, they kept trying and trying, but eventually the Inflight Services Director announced "FAs, prepare for manual safety demonstration".

These FAs (I believe this was a flight from LHR to LAX...) must have been flying 747s too much as they were not really sure what to do and they looked at each other to see what the other one did. All in all this was a fun demonstration, for the FAs too, but I would have thought they should be able to perform the safety demonstration in their sleep! So that was quite odd...

This all happened before take off.

Regarding that AA MD11: I would have thought the FAs would have to declare "Cabin ready for take off" or something before the pilots would be able to request take off...

Happy flying,


Yours truly - StarFlyer
User currently offlineDemoose From Canada, joined Mar 2001, 1952 posts, RR: 21
Reply 6, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 13 hours ago) and read 9069 times:

Yeah doesn't the senior FA have to inform the pilot that the cabin is secure before take off and landing?

Take a ride...fly across the sky
User currently offlineKearnet From United States of America, joined Sep 2001, 243 posts, RR: 0
Reply 7, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 10 hours ago) and read 9000 times:

Not the funniest thing in the world but, I found it amusing.

While on my way to PHX a routing on MHT > LGA > PIT > PHX . On the LGA > PIT segment, while we were descending into PIT I couldn't help but feel that something was missing. Almost exactly 1 min till touch down, I remembered what it was as it happend: a flight attentant begain the tradtional accouncment of the connecting flight information.

What made this so odd is that since they were so delayed in making the announcement that she kept right on going, without missing a beat all the way through touch down, rollout and taxi. When the trust reverse kicked in she didn't even pause, even we could barely hear a word she was saying but she kept right on going.

I remember chuckling the whole time, as (of course it being a flight from LGA) we were about an hour late arriving, and me being seated just forward of the intake, I was hoping to hear which gate my flight to PHX was leaving from as I didn't have much time to make it. (Fortuently the departing gate was right across from the arriving one).

User currently offlineTravatl From United States of America, joined Mar 2001, 2177 posts, RR: 6
Reply 8, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 4 days 8 hours ago) and read 8930 times:

Goldenshield -

The F.A.R. is 91.519 PASSENGER BRIEFING (and is applicable to all 121 and 135 carriers). It states:

(a) Before each takeoff, the pilot in command of an airplane carrying passengers shall ensure that all passengers have been orally briefed on -

(1) Smoking: Each passenger shall be briefed on when, where, and under what conditions smoking is prohibited. The briefing shall iinclude a statement, as appropriate, that the Federal Aviatioin Regulations requrie passenger compliance with lighted passenger informatioin signs and no smoking placards, prohibit smoking in lavatories, and require compliance with crewmember instructions with regard to these items;
(2) Use of safety belts: Each passenger shall be briefed on when, where, and under what conditions it is necessary to have his or her safety belt and, if installed, his or her shoulder harness fastened about him or her. This briefing shall include a statement, as appropriate, that Federal Aviation Regulations require passenger compliance with the lighted passenger sign and/or crewmember instructions with regard to these items;
(3) Location and means for opening the passenger entry door and emergency exits;
(4) Locations of survival equipment;
(5) Ditching procedures and the use of flotation equipment required under FAR 91.509 for flight over water; and
(6) The normal and emergency use of oxygen equipment installed on the airplane.

(b) The oral briefing required by paragraph (a) of this section shall be given by the pilot in command or a member of the crew, but need not be given when the pilot in command determines that the passengers are familiar with the contents of the briefing. It may be supplemented by printed cards for the use of each passenger containing -
(1) A diagram of, and methods of operating emergency exits; and
(2) Other instructions necessary for use of emergency equipment.

(c) Each card used under paragraph (b) must be carried in convenient locations on the airplane for the use of each passenger and must contain information that is pertinent only to the type and model airplane on which it is used.

So no, not before the aircraft moves, but before the aircraft takes off. As for the flight attendants being more "vigilant", all the lead can do is tell the captain "we're having some trouble with the video, but it's in now". If he elects to take off before it's conclusion...it's his responsibility, not the flight attendants. And pilots are so embarassed to get on frequency and say "uh, even though we're number one, we're not quite ready, can you give us about five minutes out here to finish up our safety demos?" They should, be they won't...especially the egos of an international MD11 crew....

Don't blame this on the flight attendants.


User currently offlineAApilot2b From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 586 posts, RR: 1
Reply 9, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 3 days 23 hours ago) and read 8734 times:

As I mentioned. Everything went real quick that day. We were on the runway almost immediately. I'm not in to the blame game. We all know that occasionally things happen (even at our own jobs), that shouldn't. Not that it is excusable but lets not be so quick to jump on the poor flight attendants at American Airlines. They were very professional and friendly throughout that flight and honestly when have you been on a plane where everyone paid attention to the safety instructions anyhow? I'm not condoning this behavior, but really most people wouldn't know what to do in a crash anyhow because they are rude and pay no attention to the safety demonstrations. Now I'm speaking to a bunch of fellow airliner buffs, so I expect you all to be more aware of safety when you fly, but now I'm getting us off on tangents that this forum is not about. Sorry.  Big grin Just don't want us to start beating up the people at American.

User currently offlineBabaero From Philippines, joined Jan 2002, 479 posts, RR: 0
Reply 10, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 3 days 19 hours ago) and read 8628 times:
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China Southern Takes some beating

1.On taxi out from HKG to runway 13 the cabin crew started to serve warm beers and coke from a trolley.
Unfortunatly we were at the end of the runway very quickly, and the takeoff commenced with the trolley still in the aisle of a 767. thus on rotate the trolley fell over, and you guess the little cabin attendant was on the floor as well

2.On departure from HKG again in a 767 the safety demo was welcoming you on a 757. How to evacuate on a 757, scary when your on a 767

3.Finally on arrival into HKG on this time a 737 once the aircraft stopped there was the usual mad rush for the doors. Unfortunaly as one of the overhead bins was opened a rather large trolley fell out and knocked a poor little slanty eyed man out cold. Cabin crews response was, let all the passengers get off first, and then we will see if he wakes up.

After that, i never flew CZ again.

User currently offlineDutchdeltadude From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 11, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 3 days 19 hours ago) and read 8648 times:

Coming from SFO and landing in AMS on a KLM MD11, the captain had just told the cabin crew 'ten minutes to landing'. Three minutes later, and without further warning, we landed on runway 240, the flight attendents were still in the aisle. After landing, while the captain was pushing the breakes, they all rushed to their seats, looking totally amazed.

User currently offlineAApilot2b From United States of America, joined Nov 2000, 586 posts, RR: 1
Reply 12, posted (13 years 4 months 3 weeks 3 days 15 hours ago) and read 8596 times:

I remember another occasion when the pilot of a flight I was on gave the normal before landing speech, "blah, blah, blah, thanks for choosing this airline, yada, yada, yada..." then commenced talking to the tower. I don't think he meant to broadcast that through the whole cabin. Smile I guess he forgot to change over the mike.

User currently offlineFLAIRPORT From , joined Dec 1969, posts, RR:
Reply 13, posted (13 years 4 months 2 weeks 3 days 21 hours ago) and read 8186 times:

Thats happened to me once, only at ATL!!!!! The FA seemed to start on time, but when you have all of those connections, I guess you need to start at the gate of your departing city!

I was listening to a scanner once and an MD-80 that looked normal on the runway had to turn back to the gate. I don't know why, but the pilots were too calm to have an emergency.

now AApilot2b,
Most people don't listen to the safety info because they have only seen it a billion times
(or in the case of ATL, they just got off the same aircraft!)

User currently offlineDigitalone From Australia, joined Aug 2001, 137 posts, RR: 0
Reply 14, posted (13 years 4 months 2 weeks 1 day 9 hours ago) and read 8056 times:

I did not experience this, but I heard it from a mate. They were travelling on a MH flight once, and it happened after dinner was served, right when everyone has put their headphones on. Suddenly, the PA went active and it was 2 FAs gosspining about the womanising pilot and his antiques. This went on for about one minute, which was when a fully made up, slim and glamorous kebaya-clad FA made a mad dash to the other end of the cabin. 2 seconds after she disappeared into the galley, the PA stopped, and was reactivated with announcements along the lines of, "Hope you are enjoying your meal and in-flight entertainment system etc".

I wonder what happened to those FAs...

User currently offlineBlink182 From United States of America, joined Oct 1999, 5499 posts, RR: 14
Reply 15, posted (13 years 4 months 2 weeks 1 day 4 hours ago) and read 7994 times:

Not as humorous or anything, but on a very recent flight from YVR, I kept thinking when they were going to turn off the IFE and we landed and taxied to the gate with the IFE still on. I guess the crew was interested in what was being presented.


Give me a break, I created this username when I was a kid...
User currently offlineRyefly From United States of America, joined Jun 2000, 1403 posts, RR: 0
Reply 16, posted (13 years 4 months 2 weeks 21 hours ago) and read 7974 times:

I was on a Continental flight one time from RDU to EWR, and while we were on our taxi to the runway one of the fight attendants was helping a passenger near the front of the plane. The passenger was seated at the window seat, and she was standing directly in front of the empty isle seat. Well the lead FA did not know the person standing was another flight attendant, so she kept saying over the PA system, "please take your seats, you must sit down and fasten your seat belts!" Well the FA helping the passenger didn't know the message over the intercom was directed at her and was just ignoring the announcement

Just before we reached the end of the runway, the plane swerved off to the right and stopped very sharply. The pilot came on over the intercom in a sharp voice and said he has been informed that not everyone was seated and said he was not moving another inch unless everyone sits down and fastened their seatbelts and that he was authorized to cancel the flight and return to the gate if matter was not cleared up. Meanwhile the flight attendant that was helping the passenger was now walking down the isle looking around looking for the passenger breaking the rules with a confused look on her face. With out another word, the plane started moving again. The pilot came back on the intercom a few seconds later and you could tell he was holding back from bursting out in laughter as he said, we are #1 for take off, flight attendants please take your seats for take off." Several of the passengers starting laughing at that point because they knew it was a flight attendant that was the one that caused the whole scene.

User currently offlineB-HXB From New Zealand, joined Jan 2001, 745 posts, RR: 0
Reply 17, posted (13 years 4 months 1 week 2 days 1 hour ago) and read 7808 times:

Once on a CX flight coming in to HKG the first officer came over on the intercom and said: "Cabin crew, please be seated for... er..... um... landing..." Perhaps not that funny, but it was certainly amusing for us in the cabin at the time, a case of the first officer getting a little confused?!

User currently offlineTranStar From United States of America, joined Jul 1999, 530 posts, RR: 0
Reply 18, posted (13 years 4 months 1 week 1 day 6 hours ago) and read 7770 times:

The funniest thing that that I have experienced regarding the safety demonstration was on a Continental Express EMB-120. The flight attendent, who obviously was having a long day, got up to do the manual instruction of safety features. Half-way through she blanked out and stood there unmoving, unable to remember the rest of her lines. At that moment, a group of business men who were obviously well traveled chimed in, in unison, with the proper next phrase....

"Your seatbacks and tray tables must be in the upright and locked positions..."

She laughed, thanked them for feeding her hte line, and completed the rest of the demonstration.


User currently offlineContinental From United States of America, joined Jun 2000, 5557 posts, RR: 15
Reply 19, posted (13 years 4 months 4 days 21 hours ago) and read 7680 times:

We were taxiing to runway 4L in a Sun Country 727 from JFK to MSP back in 2000. We were expecting 2+ hour delays, and I really had to pee. So my mom asked the f/a if I could use the restroom, and she said hurry. So I relieved myself, came back, and noticed the aircraft didn't move. Turned out the pilot found out that I and a few others in front of me were standing during taxi, so he couldn't move the plane. Well, also turns out that we let a Singapore 747, United 767, and a Royal Jordanian A310 which were all behind us, PASS US! I, myself, made a Singapore 747 UA 77 and RJ A310 pass us all because of me! LOL! It was to my advantage though, because I caught my first glimpse of a Kuwait Airways 777 that was then right behind us for the first time ever!


User currently offlineStratofish From Germany, joined Sep 2001, 1076 posts, RR: 5
Reply 20, posted (13 years 4 months 4 days 2 hours ago) and read 7615 times:

I once flew AF LAX-CDG. Just as we centered the runway for take off I noticed all the F/As standing in the middle of the cabin chatting. Just as I started wondering if they didn´t know take off was imminent, the 777-200 (!!!) started it´s mighty take off run. It too sent the surprised F/As unvoluntarily running towards the aft of the A/C. The last F/a took her seat after we were already airborne. Btw, there was no announcement like "prepare for take off..."


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