I need comments on this descriptive essay on an airplane trip (CO A380 HKG-CLE). What should I revise or do? Thx!


One thing that I love to do is go riding on an airplane. These massive machines have always fascinated me since I was just a little kid. It is very amazing that a gigantic piece of metal can fly in the air at about 500 miles per hour. So far, I have been on 10 trips.

Almost every airport has Jetways. A Jetway is a corridor that extends from an airport terminal to an aircraft, for the boarding and disembarkation of passengers. To get on the plane, you walk through this narrow tunnel. The Airbus 380 is big as 20 football fields back in the US. Once on the plane, the pilot and cabin crew greet you warmly. There is a soft hum of the engine and calm music playing from the plane’s speakers. The airplane seats are soft and in good condition but are nothing compared to the fluffy leathery seats in First class. “Good morning passengers. This is your pilot speaking. We will be departing Hong Kong to Cleveland in a few minutes. Meanwhile, sit back and enjoy the flight.” Soon after the pilot finishes his short speech, the plane starts to taxi. The cabin crew shows a short video about safety on the plane. “Flight attendants prepare for takeoff!” booms the pilot. The cabin lights dim. The plane’s four engines goes from a soft hum to a loud boom. The plane accelerates lightning fast to about 200 miles per hour. After that with a small jolt the plane aims toward the air and… takeoff!

The plane climbs at 15 degrees. The cabin gets slightly cooler as the plane gets higher and the pressure makes everyone’s ears pop. Finally, the plane levels off and the cabin fills with a wonderful aroma of food. The cabin crew passes out trays of chicken and rice. The passengers eat and talk with each other. Once in a while, the plane shakes and wobbles. The wind is causing the plane to do it. Sometimes it is just a little jolt of wind sometimes the plane wobbles uncontrollably. The cabin crew serves ice cream and the cabin lights dim again. This time it is for the in-flight movie. The main screen and the PTVs on the A380 show a long movie. Most of the passengers are asleep.

After breakfast the next day, everyone gets ready for landing. “Good morning passengers, this is your pilot speaking. We are about 200 miles north of Hopkins and starting our decent into Cleveland. Please turn off all your electronics and fasten your seatbelts. The temperature in Cleveland is 75 degrees. All of us at Continental Airlines would like to thank you for flying with us.” Again like takeoff, the pressure changes to there is a popping sensation in everyone’s ears. “Flight attendants prepare for landing,” says the pilot. The plane goes lower and lower. The landing gear is out. The flaps and spoilers are activated too. With a sudden bump, the plane touches the runway and stops. What a wonderful flight.

That is what an airplane flight is like. The adventure keeps me coming back for more. I will always enjoy an airplane flight