LHMark
Topic Author
Posts: 7048
Joined: Fri Jan 21, 2000 2:18 am

Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 8:44 am

What are the worst song lyrics you've heard? My top five:

5. "If they say I've never loved you, you know they are a liar." -The Doors (I'm a stickler for grammar)

4. "Egypt was troubled by the horrible asp." -REM (Quick, Amonhotep, run! it is the horrible asp!")

3. "You'd better quit talking that shit, or you'll be leaving with a fat lip." -Limp Bizkit (Really menacing, guys. I can smell the 'tude)

2. "I am a Viking, I'm going out to war
And I've got death upon my mind.
As I was leaving, oh yesterday
I've got no fear in my heart.

[Chorus]
As the shores of my home disappear
I sail over the sea without fear
Dragon ships are charging through the waves
Just want to sail away, far away into the sea, yeah!

I am a warrior, my mind is set to kill
Life and death is on the line
I am a slayer and you will taste my steel
I've got your life right in my hand

You are a loser, and it's such a shame
That you're a fool and you don't know
That I'm a Viking, I'll walk all over you
And by my sword you will die." -Yngwie Malmsteen. (Jesus Christ, is this guy for real?)


1. "Touch, if you will, my stomach. Feel how it trembles inside." -Prince (yuck)


"Sympathy is something that shouldn't be bestowed on the Yankees. Apparently it angers them." - Bob Feller
 
Guest

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 8:46 am

Anything thats rap

Eric
 
KROC
Posts: 18919
Joined: Mon May 08, 2000 11:19 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 9:00 am

Come on Eric, anything thats Rap? You cannot generalise a whole genera, especially when I can garuntee you havn't heard Good, or real Rap music. Jay-Z, DMX, Eminem, Dr. Dre, Snoop, that shit isn't real.
 
KROC
Posts: 18919
Joined: Mon May 08, 2000 11:19 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 9:13 am

The folowing are exerpts from Tim Dog songs....perhaps one of the worst rappers, lyrically of all time.

1.) "I'll wax you, tax you, I'll just fax you
Put in ?(sominian)? pumps to cold mack you"

2.) "Sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down, sit down
You know you can't fuck around wit the Jim Brown"

3.) "Step to a man wit the clan at hand
Ina masterplan, shit, Godam
Lethal weapon, rhymes are def and
Tim Dog's a man, you shouldn't a been sleeping on
I carry on wit the song, you're right, I'm dog-gone
Word is born
I'll compare and dare wit a stare
Your sayind where, I'm over here
Rap bull, a guerilla warfare
Dis my crew, don't you dare
Girls jock me, crowds clock me
While rap artists peer's cock block me
But if there a rapper that think that he's better than me
Bring it on, step to me"

All from the song "Step to Me".

I could go on, but there really is no need too.

 
EGGD
Posts: 11880
Joined: Sat Feb 24, 2001 12:01 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 9:32 am

Oooh eeehh ooohhh aaahhh aaahhhh ting tang wooolllaahhh wooolllaahhh bing bang, Oooh eeehh ooohhh aaahhh aaahhhh ting tang wooolllaahhh wooolllaahhh bang bang.

:D EGGD
 
KROC
Posts: 18919
Joined: Mon May 08, 2000 11:19 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 10:38 am

EGGD, I actually find those lyrics rather deep and meaningfull, lol.  Big grin

Mike
 
Guest

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 10:53 am

"I'm sailing away..."

"Oops I did it again!"

"Hit me baby one more time!"

But, undoubtedly, two songs take the cake...

I love you
You love me
We're a happy family
With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you
Won't you say you love me too?

And, of course...

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

(Hurting yet?)

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

(laughs as the majority of the people reading this thread shoot themselves)

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

(cackles as Johan's head expands to approx. ten time its normal size, then explodes)

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it was
And they'll continue singin' it forever just because

This is the song that doesn't end!
Yes it goes on and on my friends!
Some people started singin' it not knowin' what it- AHHHHHH!

(unknown to me, my head has been expanding slowly during this painful course in songwriting, and it now explodes; pieces of me are left everywhere)
 
An-225
Posts: 3859
Joined: Mon Sep 04, 2000 2:55 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 2:20 pm

Pretty much anything they play on the radio these days. Same goes for MTV.
Money does not bring you happiness. But it's better to cry in your own private limo than on a cold bus stop.
 
Thom@s
Posts: 11674
Joined: Thu Oct 19, 2000 2:03 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 11:11 pm

"Who let the dogs out" (Who let that song out?)  Pissed

Any Britney Spears song.

Any boy band song.

The song Brissie Lions posted in the "What do you think Johan looks like" thread. (Man, that's annoying.)  Smile

Thom@s
"If guns don't kill people, people kill people - does that mean toasters don't toast toast, toast toast toast?"
 
EGGD
Posts: 11880
Joined: Sat Feb 24, 2001 12:01 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 11:32 pm

"It wasn't me" by Shaggy.

hey i bet he got big bucks for writing that! Big grin

Regards EGGD
 
essjay
Posts: 75
Joined: Sun Dec 17, 2000 10:44 pm

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sat Mar 03, 2001 11:57 pm

"I'm a big, big girl in a big, big world, it's not a big, big thing if you leave me..."
NEED I SAY MORE!!!???
 Smile/happy/getting dizzy
 
LHMark
Topic Author
Posts: 7048
Joined: Fri Jan 21, 2000 2:18 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 04, 2001 12:41 am

(Lifts his head up from the toilet bowl) Thanks for the torture, guys.

Deep lyrics from the newest incarnation of Madonna: "Hey, Mr. DJ, put a record on. I wanna dance with my baby. (I can se she's finally emerged from her chrysalis)
"Sympathy is something that shouldn't be bestowed on the Yankees. Apparently it angers them." - Bob Feller
 
SophieMaltese
Posts: 2023
Joined: Sat Feb 17, 2001 2:08 pm

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 04, 2001 2:24 am

I don't know the name of it, but that song that goes "The rich is getting richer and the poor is getting poorer." I think it's that Maria, Maria song. Yick.
 
An-225
Posts: 3859
Joined: Mon Sep 04, 2000 2:55 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 04, 2001 10:08 am

Pretty much anything that's popular now...
Money does not bring you happiness. But it's better to cry in your own private limo than on a cold bus stop.
 
747-600X
Posts: 2494
Joined: Wed Jan 05, 2000 3:11 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 04, 2001 7:13 pm

What AN-225 said...
 
johnboy
Posts: 2561
Joined: Wed Aug 18, 1999 9:09 pm

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Mon Mar 05, 2001 3:38 am

The entire song, "I've Been to Paradise (But I've Never Been To Me)." by Charlene. The entire song is unspeakably bad, but certain lines stick out like a boil on an ass:

"Took the hand of a preacher man and we made love in the sun..."
"I've been undressed by kings and i've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to see..."
"I spent my life exploring the subtle whoring that cost too much to be free..."

I'm physically shuddering right now.


PS This is the same woman who sang, "Torn Between Two Lovers." I think she has major Oprah issues here.
 
Guest

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Tue Mar 06, 2001 10:58 am

'Let's talk about sex .....
let's talk about you 'n meee.....
let's talk about all the good thingzz...........................!'

EEEWWWAARRRGHHHH !!!!!!

Only one turns out to be even worse in everything she does:

'Thiiiis iiiiiis theeeee stoooreeeeee....,
of the hooooolyyyyywoooood gaaaaaaaaal ...............!'

'Oops I did it again ' ,-Ladies and Gentlemen,The Grammy Award for the record breaking amount of 'BURPS' in one single goes to .............!

Man,and they are paid MILLIONS of $ for THAT!
 
Matt D
Posts: 8907
Joined: Fri Nov 19, 1999 6:00 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Tue Mar 06, 2001 11:07 am

Probably not so much bad, but definitely STRANGE would have to be "Desolation Row" by Bob Dylan.

It's a 13 minute song, and I don't have all the lyrics memorized, but here are some of them:

"They're selling postcards of the hanging
"They're painting the passports brown
"The beauty parlor is filled with sailors
"The circus is in town....

"Einstein disguised as Robin Hood
"With his memories in a trunk
"Passed this way an hour ago
"With his friend a jeolous monk....

"Yes I received your letter yesterday
"About the time the doorknob broke
"When you asked me how I was doing
"Is that some kind of joke...

"Everybodies making love
"Or else expecting rain...


There is also a reference to someone "sniffing drainpipes and reciting the alphabet".

If anyone can find the complete lyrics to this song and post them, it would make for some strange reading.
 
Guest

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Tue Mar 06, 2001 4:40 pm

Essjay, Johnboy, agreed!! ROTFL!

I haven't posted here till now because I really wanted to come up with good examples.

This one's bad, but I do enjoy it...


I'm your tamagotchi
so happy that you love me
and we shall be together
forever and forever

I'm your tamagotchi
I need you to protect me
so that in the night
I can feel all right

Oye Oye yum bum, oye yum bum
Oye Oye yum bum, oye yum bum


That's the chorus. I dont remember the verses but it's basically stuff like "oh dont forget to feed me". If you remember what a tamagotchi is, this should prove to be endlessly hilarious  Big thumbs up


Other stuff:

Everything But The Girl was asked if they would allow the following changes to the lyrics for a cover of their hit, "Missing" :


... and I smurf you, like the deserts smurf the rain...


Of course, they said no.  Laugh out loud


Prince, while he was formerly known as himself, made a song with the following, which is bad, but I again find it quite fun to listen to:

and (eye) hate you, because (eye) love you
but (eye) can't love you, cause (eye) hate you

The song is accompanied by a detailed description of how (eye) would spank you in court. Instead of "I", an icon of an eye is inserted everywhere.


One last attempt:


I don't need nobody but myself cause
I don't love anybody but myself, thus
(I am the great blondinoooooo)


Words of wisdom from Swedish DJ, Johan Renck, a.k.a. Stakka Bo.
 
Guest

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Tue Mar 06, 2001 4:56 pm

Another Stakka Bo piece:

To my Bushido I can't lie
On my Bushido I rely
My Bushido gets be by
My Bushido tells me why
...
My Bushido makes me fly
My Bushido is my eyes
My Bushido is hi-fi...

It seems that this guy also directed the video for Madonna's "nothing really matters", my lordy. See the following page for evidence that such music actually exist...  Smile/happy/getting dizzy

http://www.amazon.de/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0000250CW/qid=983864543/sr=1-2_pi/028-6161629-2995740
 
Superfly
Posts: 37735
Joined: Thu May 11, 2000 8:01 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Tue Mar 06, 2001 5:40 pm

Everything by the following:

Eminem
NSYNC
Backstreet Boys
TLC
Destiny's Child
Puff Daddy
Jay-Z
Cisco
Britney Spears

They can all go to hell!  Pissed
Bring back the Concorde
 
N312RC
Posts: 2586
Joined: Mon Aug 28, 2000 10:58 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Tue Mar 06, 2001 9:26 pm

My baloney has a first name, it's H-O-M-E-R, my baloney has a second name it's H-O-M-E-R.

"She's a brick hooooouse!"
"Workin' at the Car Wash yeah"
N/A
 
spoiler
Posts: 47
Joined: Sat Apr 07, 2007 8:19 pm

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Thu Mar 08, 2001 7:14 am

Worst song lyrics? That would have to be anything that falls into the country genre.
 
lewis
Posts: 3581
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 1999 5:41 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Thu Mar 08, 2001 7:23 am

Miss Kitten-Frank Sinatra (DANNY TENAGLIA DC);

Every night with my star friends
we eat chaviar and drink champagne
sniffing in the vip area
we talk about Frank Sinatra
You know Frank Sinatra?
He's dead...hehe...dead!

............................................

Motherf***ers are so nice
s**k my d**k kiss my @$$
In the limousines we have sex,
everynight with my star friends.

And goes on and on...
 
747-451
Posts: 2327
Joined: Wed Oct 04, 2000 5:50 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 11, 2001 7:35 am

1) "you a queen so I treats you royal" rap song unknow, heard it from a "boom" car. Please learn proper diction and sentence structure!

2) "Shake your Bon-Bon" - Ricky Martin whole song...I want to GAG!
 
777YYC
Posts: 702
Joined: Wed May 03, 2000 10:46 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 11, 2001 1:35 pm

"Only time will tell if we stand the test of time" 'Why Can't This be Love' by Van Halen. Still a great song, btw.

 Smile
 
flyf15
Posts: 6633
Joined: Tue May 18, 1999 11:10 am

RE: Worst Song Lyrics.

Sun Mar 11, 2001 5:53 pm

...the typical bulls*** ... all the money they got, all the ice they wear, all the people they shot, all the freaks they know, and all the cars they drive... Want to keep it real? Walk out your door, thats as real as it gets, from the sky to the floor.

From ICP - Take Me Away.

I'd say they came up with a nice list of what bad song lyrics (as far as rap goes) are. Seems like every popular rap song these days are about the above listed items.

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