Shared with me via a co-worker......
It's great to be a man because .....
Your ass is never a factor in a job
Your orgasms are real. Always.
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
You never feel compelled to stop a friend
from getting laid.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You don't give a rat's ass if someone
notices your new haircut.
Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
Wrinkles add character.
A few well placed one night stands gain
credibility, not leave you tarnished.
You don't have to leave the room to make
emergency crotch adjustments.
People never glance at your chest when
you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle
Porn movies are designed with you in mind.
Not liking a person does not preclude
having great sex with them.
Your pals can be trusted never to trap you
with "So, notice anything different?"
You can throw a ball more than 5 feet.
A five-day vacation requires only one
You can open all your own jars.
Dry cleaners and hairdressers don't rob
You can go to a public toilet without a
You can leave a hotel bed unmade.
You can kill your own food.
You get extra credit for the slightest act
If someone forgets to invite you to
something, he or she can still be our friend.
If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
Everything on your face stays its original
You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You don't have to clean your appartment if
the electricity meter reader is coming.
You can sit in silence watching a football
game with your friend for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad
You don't mooch off other's desserts.
You can drop by to see a friend without
having to bring a little gift.
If another guy shows up at the party in
the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
You are not expected to know the names of
more than five colors.
You don't have to stop and think of which
way to turn a nut on a bolt.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe
You don't have to shave below your neck.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one
color, all seasons.
You can "do" your nails with a
You have freedom of choice concerning
growing a moustache.
Christmas shopping can be accomplished for
25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.
Same job ..... more pay.
The world is your urinal.