What the brightest star in the sky is?
My guess would be the sun.
How many constellations there are?
I believe TWA retired the last Constellation operating in passenger service in the early 1960's.
What the difference between a magnitude -1 and a magnitude 3 star are?
About four magnitudes.
What the difference between apparent and absolute magnitude are?
About seven letters.
What the next closet star is to the earth besides the Sun?
That would be the North Star. I believe it is at the north pole, or something like that.
What a parsec is?
Something they say a lot on Star Trek.
What an Astronomical Unit is?
The price of a ticket on AA out of DFW.
What declination and right ascention are?
Declination deals with my inability to do any work today and right ascention deals with the fit of my trousers.
What the ecliptic is?
Rich people are not crazy, they are ecliptic.
What parallax is?
A small cat that forages the southern Kalahari Desert.
What precession is?
The era that preceded the Mexican Cession. As in "California in 1840 sufferred through the pre-Cession economy due to neglect from the Mexican Government."
What proper motion is?
Proper motion is that motion which is not prohibited by federal or state law.
What the Red Shift is?
The Red Shift occurred throughout Europe and Asia during the early and mid 20th Century as governments were overthrown by Communist insurrections.
What the largest and smallest constellations are?
I would think Scorpio is the smallest as scorpions are pretty small and Taurus is the larges because bulls are pretty big.
What constellation Aldebaran is in?
What a variable is?
Something that is not stable.
What constellation has the starts Alnitak, Alnilam, and Mintaka in it, and what those three stars are?
The raging Eskimo
What perhelion and aphelion are?
Characters in the Greek tragedy Antigone
What transit means?
To move (duh)
So, Matt, how did I do? Pretty darn good for not even looking at an astrology book.