Cathay Pacific
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Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Wed Apr 17, 2002 10:49 pm

Time to have some laughs!!!(I got this from another forum.)

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FUNNY SIGNS IN ENGLISH FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD


Cocktail lounge, Norway:
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR


At a Budapest zoo:
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS.
IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD,
GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY


Doctor office, Rome:
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES


Hotel, Acapulco:
THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE


Information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner, Japan:
COOLS AND HEATS: IF YOU WANT JUST CONDITION OF WARM AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF


Car rental brochure, Tokyo:
WHEN PASSENGER OF FOOT HEAVE IN SIGHT, TOOTLE THE HORN. TRUMPET HIM MELODIOUSLY AT FIRST,
BUT IF HE STILL OBSTACLES YOUR
PASSAGE THEN TOOTLE HIM WITH VIGOR


Dry cleaner's, Bangkok:
DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS


Sign in men's rest room in Japan:
TO STOP LEAK TURN COCK TO THE RIGHT


In a Nairobi restaurant:
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER


On the grounds of a private school:
NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION


On an Athi River highway:
TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE


On a poster at Kencom:
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ?
IF SO, WE CAN HELP


In a City restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS


One of the Mathare buildings:
MENTAL HEALTH PREVENTION CENTRE


A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:
DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS


In a Pumwani maternity ward:
NO CHILDREN ALLOWED


In a cemetery
PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES


Sign in Japanese public bath:
FOREIGN GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO PULL COCK IN TUB


Tokyo hotel's rules and regulations:
GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIORS IN BED


Hotel notice, Tokyo:
IS FORBIDDEN TO STEAL HOTEL TOWELS PLEASE.
IF YOU ARE NOT A PERSON TO DO SUCH A THING IS PLEASE NOT TO HEED NOTIS


On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR


In a Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS


In a Bangkok temple:
IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN EVEN A FOREIGNER IF DRESSED AS A MAN


Hotel room notice, Chiang-Mai, Thailand:
PLEASE DO NOT BRING SOLICITORS INTO YOUR ROOM


Hotel brochure, Italy:
THIS HOTEL IS RENOWNED FOR ITS PEACE AND SOLITUDE.
IN FACT, CROWDS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD FLOCK HERE TO ENJOY ITS SOLITUDE


Hotel lobby, Bucharest:
THE LIFT IS BEING FIXED FOR THE NEXT DAY.
DURING THAT TIME WE REGRET THAT YOU WILL BE UNBEARABLE


Hotel elevator, Paris:
PLEASE LEAVE YOUR VALUES AT THE FRONT DESK


Hotel, Yugoslavia:
THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID


Hotel, Japan:
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID


In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY


Hotel catering to skiers, Austria:
NOT TO PERAMBULATE THE CORRIDORS IN THE HOURS OF REPOSE IN THE BOOTS OF ASCENSION


Taken from a menu, Poland:
SALAD A FIRM'S OWN MAKE;
LIMPID RED BEET SOUP WITH CHEESY DUMPLINGS IN THE FORM OF A FINGER;
ROASTED DUCK LET LOOSE;
BEEF RASHERS BEATEN IN THE COUNTRY PEOPLE'S FASHION


From the "Soviet Weekly":
THERE WILL BE A MOSCOW EXHIBITION OF ARTS BY 15,000 SOVIET REPUBLIC PAINTERS AND SCULPTORS.
THESE WERE EXECUTED OVER THE PAST TWO YEARS


In an East African newspaper:
A NEW SWIMMING POOL IS RAPIDLY TAKING SHAPE SINCE THE CONTRACTORS HAVE THROWN IN THE BULK OF THEIR WORKERS


Hotel, Vienna:
IN CASE OF FIRE, DO YOUR UTMOST TO ALARM THE HOTEL PORTER


A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest:
IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE


Hotel, Zurich:
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE


An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS


A laundry in Rome:
LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME


Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia:
TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE NO MISCARRIAGES


Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?


In the window on a Swedish furrier:
FUR COATS MADE FOR LADIES FROM THEIR OWN SKIN


The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE


In a Swiss mountain inn:
SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM


Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS


On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST VISIT TO THE USSR,
YOU ARE WELCOME TO IT


Supermarket, Hong Kong:
FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE, WE RECOMMEND COURTEOUS, EFFICIENT SELF-SERVICE

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sorry if it is too long!
cathay pacific, now you're really flying
 
tbar220
Posts: 6706
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2000 12:08 pm

RE: Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Thu Apr 18, 2002 1:25 am

Don't be sorry, that was hilarious!!  Big thumbs up

I have two pictures of funny signs that I've seen. I will scan them and post them here as soon as I can. These were great! Big grin
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PH-BFA
Posts: 444
Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2002 6:22 pm

RE: Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Thu Apr 18, 2002 6:15 am

I have got some:

plumber: 'We repair everything your husband fixed'
billboard on side of the road: 'Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs'
at an optometrist: If you don't see what you are looking for, you have come to the right place'

PH-BFA
 
flyf15
Posts: 6633
Joined: Tue May 18, 1999 11:10 am

RE: Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Thu Apr 18, 2002 8:23 am

 
ILuvYak40
Posts: 116
Joined: Thu May 03, 2001 5:52 am

RE: Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Thu Apr 18, 2002 12:41 pm

Here's a sign i saw in Nuremberg, Germany... gotta love British English and its innocence...

 
Tcas
Posts: 254
Joined: Sat Sep 23, 2006 5:01 am

RE: Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Thu Apr 18, 2002 12:48 pm



 Big thumbs up
 
ILOVEA340
Posts: 2064
Joined: Sat Oct 30, 1999 9:49 am

RE: Funny Signs IN English From All Over The World

Thu Apr 18, 2002 3:51 pm

they are funny but I have to say that some are not mess-ups. Some were meant as jokes...

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