mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 5:10 am

OK, for the trip report, you can look in that respective forum b/c the flight itself was pretty cool.

Just asked my g/f to marry and she said yes.

Thanks to all for your proposal ideas a few weeks back.

Any mixed religion marriages out there? Care to comment?
Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
Hepkat
Posts: 2134
Joined: Fri Aug 11, 2000 8:22 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 5:18 am

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

Does she know about this forum?

And she still wanted to marry you?
 
Rai
Posts: 1697
Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:12 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 5:24 am

Sure. My parents. My father is Jewish and my mother is Greek Orthadox. Highly unusual union, but it seems to have worked thus far...far better than any of the marriages on my father's side and they all married within the religion. My parents aren't too, too religious. We observed some of the holidays for both religions, but neither really cared too much about what path we chose to follow. How we ended up was completely up to us and my parents were very open-minded about it. I believe being open-minded about this and pretty much any other issue is paramount for any marriage. But anyways, I am the eldest of three children. I stray more to the Christian side and my sister, who is the youngest, seems to be more Jewish. My brother is sort of in the middle and doesn't really care. But regardless of what faith/path we chose, we all respect the religion of our parents and honor both of them come holiday time. Also meant more presents for us.  Smile

But congratulations! This is a momentous event in your life and it only gets more complicated from here. You have mentioned how much you really care for this girl and how you wanted to marry her. You are very lucky to have met the right person, especially at your age. A lot of people spend a lifetime trying to find someone worth spending the rest of their lives with. One word of advice, you're gonna have to get your kids a lot of presents! But they'll probably have a happier childhood this way.  Big grin
 
lubcha132
Posts: 2642
Joined: Tue Feb 20, 2001 10:37 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 5:33 am

Rai- technically you're not jewish at all.

Mirrodie is she Jewish or are you?
 
EGFF
Posts: 2082
Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2001 5:53 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 5:48 am

Congratulations Mirrodie  Big thumbs up
EGFF
All together or not at all
 
Guest

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 6:39 am

... and all our best wishes, and congratulations too...
(s) Skipper, Mrs. Skipper and family
 
mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 7:19 am

I'm the raised Catholic and she is the raised Jew. Raised implies that we are holiday capacity worshipers.

So we are you Judeo-Christian holiday couple.


My parents are fully supportive. Hers are gonna need more, um, talking to.
Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
lubcha132
Posts: 2642
Joined: Tue Feb 20, 2001 10:37 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 8:27 am

yeah well the dwindling numbers of jews in the world and the high rate of intermarriage..i can see why her parents aren't so happy.

any interest in converting?
 
Rai
Posts: 1697
Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 6:12 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:12 am

Rai- technically you're not jewish at all.

You know, that's the reaction I continuously got from the Canadian Jewish community when I was living there. Since I moved to the U.S., I've been welcomed by the Jews here with complete open arms...eventhough "technically I'm not Jewish." Whatever.

Mirrodie: My mother side had no problem with my parents' marriage. But my father's parents, at least my grandmother, was very skeptical at first. They eventually gave in and my grandmother even got to love my mother, eventhough she wasn't Jewish. My grandparents are dead now and we have absolutely no relations at all with my father's side of the family -- mostly because we aren't "Jewish enough". I think it varies.

yeah well the dwindling numbers of jews in the world and the high rate of intermarriage..i can see why her parents aren't so happy.

Well, no offence, but Jewish girls (except for the ones from Israel or Russia) are pretty nasty. I wouldn't marry one either. Israeli girls are hot, but they age really bad after they hit 30. None of my Jewish friends is dating a Jewish girl either, as a matter of fact. One is dating an Italian/Irish girl and the other is dating a Chinese/Japanese. The others are still single.  Smile
 
redngold
Posts: 6673
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2000 12:26 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 10:45 am

Congrats Mirrodie!

 Smile redngold
Up, up and away!
 
User avatar
Goodbye
Posts: 855
Joined: Mon Jan 22, 2001 1:41 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 11:13 am

Congratulations Mirrodie!!

:D

Ash
✈︎
 
mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 11:15 am

First off, thanks for the words all. Feeling good.

Lubcha/ Josh, right? Yes, the world may be dwindling Jews, but my fiance and I have agreeed already that our kids would be raised Jewish. I feel that is a HUGE concern that we decided together and I feel good about it. I embrace the religion and learning about it.

Her mother asked me what I felt about converting and I told her that I was a Catholic that had issues with my own faith. That my simply converting would not be the best way to clear those concerns.

She said she respected that. So overall, I am not contributing to the dwindling amount of Jews worldwide (not that I am saying you said that to me.  Smile/happy/getting dizzy)


Personally, I think we took a big step in deciding that with the kids. Yet why the push to convert me?
Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
trickijedi
Posts: 3201
Joined: Sun May 13, 2001 4:35 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 11:16 am

Just want to say Congrats Mirrodie!
Its better to be on the ground wishing you were in the air than be in the air wishing you were on the ground. Fly safe!
 
lubcha132
Posts: 2642
Joined: Tue Feb 20, 2001 10:37 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 11:27 am

actually i do know a jewish woman who married a catholic guy and the kids are really into judaism. so its not really an issue as long as you get them circumsized and make them legit jews (oh shit i said the C word here comes the holy war). if the boys don't have "milah" (circumcision, the word Bris means covenant more on that later) they're not technically jewish.


the real problem would be non jewish woman and jewish man because unless she converts the kids aren't jewish.


J
 
blink182
Posts: 5282
Joined: Mon Oct 18, 1999 3:09 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 11:29 am

I think as long as none of you are extremely religious and let your future offspring decide for themselves, it really shouldn't be a big deal. I'd say maybe do some things with your religion and do some things with hers. Celebrate both, that way both sides are happy and your kids get full exposure to both sides as well. For the Jewish things, you don't have to actively participate, but be there and have fun and same story with your Fiancee and Christian holidays.

Anyway, congrats  Smile.

blink
Give me a break, I created this username when I was a kid...
 
IMissPiedmont
Posts: 6200
Joined: Wed May 23, 2001 12:58 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 12:58 pm

She said yes? Lord, the world is indeed ending.  Smile/happy/getting dizzy

Can you give me a hint or 2 that might work with my lover? I want the woman as my wife so bad that I can taste it. Wait a minute, that's not what I mean. I mean that I am so in love with her that all I want to do is eat her up. Oh wait a minute, that came out wrong also. I give up.

Seroiusly, congatulations on the upcoming nuptials.
The day you stop learning is the day you should die.
 
AWspicious
Posts: 2780
Joined: Fri Sep 14, 2001 7:47 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 3:09 pm

Gonna need help with what - Skipping the country?  Laugh out loud
Nevermind political correctness - Envision using your turn signals!
 
ryanb741
Posts: 5058
Joined: Thu Mar 28, 2002 6:36 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:13 pm

I am Roman Catholic by birth and my wife is a devout Buddhist. We have no problems ever about religion - I guess the only slight bone of contention is when we have kids - what religion will they be brought up as. We both agreed that the fairest thing to do is bring them up with no religion, and when they are old enough let them make their own choice.
I used to think the brain is the most fascinating part of my body. But, hey, who is telling me that?
 
tincan
Posts: 209
Joined: Thu Apr 06, 2000 11:04 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:17 pm

I agree with what Ryanb741 said "We both agreed that the fairest thing to do is bring them up with no religion, and when they are old enough let them make their own choice."

It's too hard to make a choice between the two religions and choose which one you should raise your kids with.
 
flyboy36y
Posts: 2897
Joined: Sun Mar 19, 2000 1:45 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 9:31 pm

Congrats Mirrodie!

Aww!!! Forger telligion. Forget it exists. All my GF's were not jewish and I love it! No problems. It's all 'bout love.
 
Stretch 8
Posts: 2468
Joined: Fri May 28, 1999 4:00 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Wed Sep 25, 2002 10:55 pm

Good luck with the marriage. The part about raising your children as Jewish should be viewed as a concession to her parents. As for conversion yourself, I suggest you continue to learn about her faith. Don't reject your Christian beliefs casually. She love and respects you, and will still if you decide not to convert. Best wishes!
Maggs swings, it's a drive deep to left! The Tigers are going to the World Series!!!
 
Lindy
Posts: 4722
Joined: Wed May 19, 1999 10:42 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Sep 26, 2002 12:05 am

Hey, I'm going to propose this weekend  Smile
BWIADCA - Nikon D100
 
mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Sep 26, 2002 7:11 am

Good luck on your proposal.

Yep, I am so wanting and willing to learn about Judaism and yes, talk about concession(the ultimate sacrifice) with respect to raising the kids Jewish.

I want to raise the kids Jewish. I want to learn about Judaism but I don't think pressuring me into converting is right. Meanwhile, I think her parents are still trying to brainwash her.

I'm even reading books on interfaith marraige/relationships and subscribe to www.dovetailinstitute.org. I am doing all I can here.

Thanks for your support.

mirrodie

Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
777236ER
Posts: 12213
Joined: Sat Aug 18, 2001 7:10 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Sep 26, 2002 7:16 am

If A.net mods can get married there's hope for us all. Well, except Matt D.

Anyway, why the fuck does religion come into all this? Yknow everyone would be a lot happier if they just worshiped me.
Your bone's got a little machine
 
mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Sep 26, 2002 9:16 am

Now that is an effective and unbiased solution!


Thanks 777236ER.

longer stressed,  Smokin cool -M
Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Fri Sep 27, 2002 6:18 am

Is anyone on the site in a mixed marraige?
Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
USAFHummer
Posts: 10261
Joined: Thu May 18, 2000 12:22 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Fri Sep 27, 2002 10:33 am

My 1st cousin, a Jew, married a Christian (Im not sure what denomination she was, I think Lutheran but Im not positive)...they agreed to raise their kids Jewish too, but at their wedding they had both a reverend and a rabbi speak....

Greg
Chief A.net college football stadium self-pic guru
 
mirrodie
Posts: 6789
Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2000 3:33 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Fri Sep 27, 2002 11:37 am

We definitely want both officiants of both faiths there as well.

Forum moderator 2001-2010; He's a pedantic, pontificating, pretentious bastard, a belligerent old fart, a worthless st
 
propatriamori
Posts: 131
Joined: Wed Jun 07, 2000 6:42 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Oct 03, 2002 2:38 am

My wife was raised Islamic, I was raised in a strict Protestant denomination. Things work out extraordinarily well in our household. In my experience, religious practices/ideas in a mixed marriage do not need to be a huge factor if the two of you are of the "same mind".
 
rapo
Posts: 383
Joined: Fri Sep 17, 1999 12:04 pm

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Oct 03, 2002 2:48 am

My wife is Irish Catholic while I'm Lutheran. Not a too big of a gulf between those two, but the reason for my post if my friend's most mixed of all marriages. He is an Iranian Muslim (family came over here just before the Shah fell) while his wife is Jewish (not sure on her nationality but she's a hottie!) Yep you heard right: Muslim & Jewish. And they've been married for more than 10 years now & have a bright little boy. Just for clarity, his loyalties lie thoroughly with the US of A. He's militantly anti-Taliban (you should see some of the stuff he sends me!) & is completely behind the war on terrorism.

sorry if I got a little too off topic,
rapo
 
Krushny
Posts: 756
Joined: Sun Dec 24, 2000 4:22 am

RE: I Got Engaged This Weekend. Gonna Need Help.

Thu Oct 03, 2002 6:33 am

My wife and me were raised as Catholics (as 99% of Spaniards my age). Not really a curious religious combination. But one of my greatest childhood friends became a Catholic priest and eventually officiated our marriage.
Now my friend has a kid and lives with a woman... I am quite happy for him if he's happy , but isn't it a bad omen for my marriage??

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