USAFHummer
Topic Author
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Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 10:35 am

Lets face it...to me the two are almost identical...given a blind taste test I dont think I could distinguish between the two...anyone else have that feeling?

Greg
Chief A.net college football stadium self-pic guru
 
TheGov
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 11:08 am

I've kinda wondered the same thing.

Oh well, another mystery of the universe to confound the masses.
Always a pallbearer, never a corpse.
 
IHadAPheo
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 11:09 am


There's always Spam
Pray hard but pray with care For the tears that you are crying now Are just your answered prayers
 
BR715-A1-30
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 11:17 am

Read this!!!



DynaCorp

Announcer.....Chris Parnell
.....Jessica Simpson
Porky.....Will Forte




[ open on footage of Jessica Simpson concert ending ]

[ dissolve to Jessica running backstage ]

Announcer: Hey, Jessica - great concert!

Jessica Simpson: [ toweling off ] Thanks!

Announcer: Looks like you worked up quite an appeite out there!

Jessica Simpson: Did.. I.. ever! That's why, after every show, I reach for a can of Chicken of the Sea brand tuna! [ holds up can ] Everyone knows that Chicken of the Sea is tuna, but what you might not know is that tuna is fish, not chicken. So, look for the can with the mermaid on the label! Chicken of the Sea brand tuna - America's #1 non-chicken brand fish!

Announcer: But.. what if you wanted tuna that is chicken?

Jessica Simpson: [ confused ] Huh..?

Announcer: If you like Chicken of the Sea brand tuna, then you'll love new Tuna of the Dirt brand chicken!

[ the can is handed to Jessica ]

Jessica Simpson: [ examining the can ] Tuna of the.. Dirt..?

Announcer: Yep! Tuna of the Dirt is 100% top-grade tuna-free canned chicken!

Jessica Simpson: Hmm.. so, wait.. is it tuna or not?

Announcer: Oh, it's tuna alright - Tuna of the Dirt brand chicken! So, when you're sure you don't want fish, grab the only chicken good enough to be called tuna - Tuna of the Dirt brand chicken. Look for the chicken with the cowboy on the label!

Jessica Simpson: Wait! I'm confused! Why is a.. a cowboy on this chicken can holding a fish pole?

Announcer: Well, because he's fishing around for quality chicken! Tuna of the Dirt - the chicken with the fishing cowboy on the label. In the tuna section of your supermarket!

Jessica Simpson: This is so confusing! I think I'm just going to eat a piece of fruit.

Announcer: Then, you're in luck! Becuase if you're looking for fruit that's every bit as good as our chicken and tuna, then you'll want Turkey of the Jungle brand bananas!

[ the can is handed to Jessica ]

Jessica Simpson: Wait.. stop. Turkey of the Jungle?

Announcer: That's right. Turkey of the Jungle brand bananas. From the makers of Chicken of the Sea brand tuna, and Tuna of the Dirt brand chicken. If fish grew on treees, they'd be Turkey of the Jungle brand bananas!

Jessica Simpson: Thid is ha-ard!

Announcer: Nothing hard about it. Turkey of the Jungle brand bananas can be found in the chicken aisle, right next to Pork of the Orchard brand apples.

[ the can is handed to Jessica ]

Announcer: Pork of the Orchard brand apples. Look for the apples with the picture of a turkey on the can!

Jessica Simpson: [ greatly confused ] Uh.. uh.. so, if the apples.. have a turkey on the can.. then.. what does.. what does the can have with the bananas?

Announcer: Why, that would be the Turkey of the Jungle mascot - Porky, the Scubadiving Chicken! And Porky says:

[ Porky, a scubadiving chicken mascot, waddles up to Jessica ] Porky: [ singing ]
"If you want fruit, not fish nor fowl
Turkey of the Jungle makes this chicken howl!"
Owwwwwww! This turkey is good bananas!

[ Porky waddles off ]

Jessica Simpson: Please stop.. my head hurts..

Announcer: Ohhhh.. then, you need Chicken of the Medicine Cabinet - the turkey-flavored aspirin that comes in a tuna can.

[ the can is handed to Jessica ]

Jessica Simpson: No!

Announcer: Chicken of the Medicine Cabinet brand turkey-flavored aspirin. Look for the tuna can with the chicken can on the label!

[ Jessica appears exasperated, as the camera pans over to a table full of DynaCorp products ]

[ dissolve to phony product labels ]

Announcer: DynaCorp. Bringing you everything from Chicken of Sea brand tuna, to Shoepolish of the Outhouse brand typing paper. DynaCorp. The Kangaroo Rat of the Billiard Room.
Puhdiddle
 
ArmitageShanks
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 1:46 pm

That would have been the funniest commercial ever if it were half as long. Seriously.
 
USAIRWAYS321
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna

Sun Feb 15, 2004 8:08 pm

Greg, if this is the kind of thing you sit and think about for hours, I worry about you... Big grin

[Edited 2004-02-15 12:08:49]
 
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scbriml
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 8:26 pm

Canned chicken - only in America!  Nuts

[he says, hurrying off to see if his local supermarket stocks canned chicken!]
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana!
 
L-188
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 8:27 pm

What is so weird about canned Chicken?

Makes great chicken Salad sandwiches.
OBAMA-WORST PRESIDENT EVER....Even SKOORB would be better.
 
TSV
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Sun Feb 15, 2004 8:30 pm

Everything tastes the same when it's gone off!
"I told you I was ill ..." Spike Milligan
 
SN-A330
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Mon Feb 16, 2004 5:05 am

USAFHummer, what have you been smoking?  Confused

Regards, SN-A330
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USAFHummer
Topic Author
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Mon Feb 16, 2004 5:18 am

Come on, all of you doubters...get someone to give you a blind taste test and then you'll see what I mean!!!

Greg
Chief A.net college football stadium self-pic guru
 
SN-A330
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Mon Feb 16, 2004 5:30 am

Greg,

Just send a few cans to Belgium with DHL please.

Thanks, SN-A330
I would rather be flying...
 
essjay
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Mon Feb 16, 2004 7:00 am

CANNED CHICKEN!!??

You're having a laugh right?

(God bless America...)

 Smile/happy/getting dizzy
 
SN-A330
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Mon Feb 16, 2004 7:08 am

do US chickens swim in the sea or do the fish have feathers ?

Regards, SN-A330
I would rather be flying...
 
USAFHummer
Topic Author
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RE: Why Does Canned Chicken Taste Like Canned Tuna?

Mon Feb 16, 2004 8:23 am

http://www.valleyfreshkitchen.com/ValleyFresh.php?PageReq=OurProducts&screenWidth=1920

All you non-Americans who have never heard of it must be so deprived without the novelty of canned chicken...but just have some canned tuna and you can simulate the experience!

Greg

[Edited 2004-02-16 00:25:42]
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