iakobos
Posts: 3255
Joined: Wed Aug 06, 2003 6:22 pm

Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 5:12 am

Perhaps a chance to have a laugh, possibly a welcome feat under present day life...here follow 17 good reasons to choose the craft with wings.
Glad to see more reasons added, from either side.

1. Airplanes can kill you quickly; a woman takes her time.
2. Airplanes can be turned on by a flick of a switch.
3. Airplanes don't get mad if you 'touch and go.'
4. Airplanes don't object to a preflight inspection.
5. Airplanes operate inverted.
6. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation.
7. Airplanes have strict weight and balance limits.
8. Airplanes can be flown any time of the month.
9. Airplanes don't come with in-laws.
10. Airplanes don't care about how many other airplanes you have flown before.
11. Airplanes and pilots both arrive at the same time.
12. Airplanes don't complain if you hose them down.
13. Airplanes don't mind if you like to look at other airplanes.
14. Airplanes can get high without throwing up.
15. Airplanes expect to be tied down.
16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.
17. Airplanes don't whine unless something is really wrong.
18. However, when airplanes go quiet, just like a woman, it's a bad thing.
 
Boeing Nut
Posts: 5078
Joined: Fri Feb 23, 2001 2:42 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 9:21 am

If it's got props or tits, it's gonna give you problems.  Laugh out loud
I'm not a real aeronautical engineer, I just play one on Airliners.net.
 
futureualpilot
Posts: 2402
Joined: Thu May 25, 2000 10:52 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 9:32 am

hahahahaha

Boeing nut that was the funniest thing Ive heard on here latley.

Remember, airplane engines stop whining at the gate....
Life is better when you surf.
 
DLKAPA
Posts: 7962
Joined: Wed Dec 03, 2003 10:37 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 9:57 am

16. Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.

Woop Woop- Pull Up
Woop Woop- Pull Up
And all at once the crowd begins to sing: Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
 
eclipseflight7
Posts: 482
Joined: Sun Apr 18, 2004 10:00 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 10:50 am

Don't sink
Don't sink
Don't sink
Sink Rate
Sink Rate
Sink Rate
Whoop Whoop- pull up
Whoop Whoop- pull up
Whoop Whoop- pull up
Traffic Alert
Traffic Alert
Traffic Alert

And yes, the airplane is still on the ground.
Holy sh*ts and burritos.
 
FlagshipAZ
Posts: 3192
Joined: Sun Jan 28, 2001 12:40 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 11:44 am

Hugh Hefner had both at one time. A brand-spanking new DC-9-30 & all the bunnies he could stuffed in it.  Wink/being sarcastic Regards.
"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." --Ben Franklin
 
trickijedi
Posts: 3201
Joined: Sun May 13, 2001 4:35 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 12:16 pm

19. Airplanes have no problems taking a full load.
Its better to be on the ground wishing you were in the air than be in the air wishing you were on the ground. Fly safe!
 
dl021
Posts: 10836
Joined: Fri May 21, 2004 12:04 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 1:13 pm

A woman is good to be inside during a bad storm.

A woman can be refueled easily while traveling somewhere.

A woman will perform acts illegal in Alabama with you in an airplane if properly fueled and lubricated.

A woman will keep you warm on cold winter nights, you have to warm up an airplane on cold winter nights. (Both sometimes do require de-icing, depending on weather conditions).

Hell, I'm going to bed!
Is my Pan Am ticket to the moon still good?
 
malb777
Posts: 443
Joined: Thu Jul 08, 2004 5:53 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 1:55 pm

Both have a cockpit so to speak, its up to the individual as to which to sit in
thank god i was not born a bird. this type of flying is much better
 
aa61hvy
Posts: 13021
Joined: Fri Nov 05, 1999 9:21 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 3:04 pm

Women... Last time I checked, a 767 can't give blow jobs.
Go big or go home
 
ZKSUJ
Posts: 6804
Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 5:15 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 6:47 pm

Hard question, let me think about it......(to be continued)
 
Tiger119
Posts: 1593
Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2003 1:52 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 7:50 pm

Depends on what the woman looks like. You pretty much know what the airplane looks like and what it will do in any given situation............
Flying is the second greatest thrill known to mankind, landing is the first!
 
Klaus
Posts: 20578
Joined: Wed Jul 11, 2001 7:41 am

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 8:10 pm

Airplanes don't comment on your piloting skills.

It gets worse: "... 40 ... 30 ... 20 ... retard! retard! retard!" (Airbus)  Big thumbs up
 
iakobos
Posts: 3255
Joined: Wed Aug 06, 2003 6:22 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Sun Sep 05, 2004 9:34 pm

I should have thought that most here are computer-age children and experienced FS room pilots.
In better times, pilots were really driving the planes, with George only giving a helping hand when target altitude and speed had been reached.
Other than George, the only electric help onboard was a bell to call one or more of the delicious air hostesses (a world apart from present day "snack bar style" flight attendants) into the roomy cockpit for whatever reason.

Sorry you missed this chaps.
 
ZKSUJ
Posts: 6804
Joined: Tue May 18, 2004 5:15 pm

RE: Airplanes Or Women? Make Your Choice

Mon Sep 06, 2004 6:49 pm

(continued from reply 10)
...I will choose aircraft if my girlfriend allows me to Big grin

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