Sabena332
Topic Author
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Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:06 am

Hello all,

I noticed that many British members are using the word "Chav" lately, Whitehatter for example posted the following picture in another thread:



Another member used the word "Chav" in a thread in the Aviation Polls & Preferences Forum:

Quoting Fbgdavidson:
I think VS does attract way more chavs than BA...I think it is the LGW South factor.

So what exactly is a "Chav"? I typed it in an English -> German translator but it had no result.

Patrick
NZ1's mother is a disgusting crack-whore and his father is a worthless alcoholic!
 
DIJKKIJK
Posts: 1784
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:10 am

Never argue with idiots. They will bring you down to their level, and beat you with experience.
 
Logan22L
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:13 am

I'm sure many others can explain it in more detail, but it is generally an unemployed teenaged or early 20s scumbag wimp/wimpette who tries to intimidate and harrass decent folk, and walks around wearing Burberry plaid, playing loud obnoxius music, passing out and vomiting on lawns, and generally sucking the life out of society.

Feel free to embellish. I know, it sounds like I'm describing Kirkie to a "T", but even I wouldn't go that far with our kilted friend. Wink

Logan
"The deeper you go, the higher you fly. The higher you fly, the deeper you go."
 
Sabena332
Topic Author
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:25 am

Thanks for your replies guys, now I know what a chav is!

DIJKKIJK, the website is freaking hilarious, I didn't read everything until now but I already laughed my a$$ off a few times. Seems that these guys are not very welcome judging from quotes like the following:

They are a general waste of space and oxygen and I think they should all be boiled in acid, sealed in concrete and dumped in the sea.




Patrick
NZ1's mother is a disgusting crack-whore and his father is a worthless alcoholic!
 
aa61hvy
Posts: 13021
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:35 am

Patty Cakes-this is a double post, this has been discussed before  Smile
Go big or go home
 
DLKAPA
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:42 am

Quoting AA61Hvy (Reply 4):
Patty Cakes

Are you two gay lovers now?
And all at once the crowd begins to sing: Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
 
aa61hvy
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:43 am

Sorry to destroy your fantasy chin pubes, no....
Go big or go home
 
DLKAPA
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 1:51 am

ok roid rage I'll pretend I didn't see you two at the candlelight dinner last night.
And all at once the crowd begins to sing: Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same
 
teahan
Posts: 4990
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 2:22 am

I always believe the best way to explain something is with examples so I was going to give you a few but I see you already got enough replies.  Sad
Goodbye SR-LX MD-11 / 6th of March 1991 to the 31st of October 2004
 
gladave
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 2:36 am

dont forget they have kids at the age of between 13-17 and dont generally know who the father is
NO URLS in signature
 
BMIFlyer
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 3:32 am

Quoting Sabena332 (Thread starter):
What Is A "Chav"?

This should help you  Wink

http://www.chavscum.co.uk/

Thanks


Lee
Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own
 
Mexicana757
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 6:31 am

Quoting Gladave (Reply 9):
dont forget they have kids at the age of between 13-17 and dont generally know who the father is

Something of a cross breed between Jerry Springer and the Maury Povich show.  silly 
 
ZRH
Posts: 4371
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 6:43 am

Is GWB a chav? Big grin (sorry couldn't resist)
 
flyAUA
Posts: 4287
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 6:54 am

Quoting ZRH (Reply 12):
Is GWB a chav? (sorry couldn't resist)

Hahaha, you just earned yourself some more respect!! 

I doubt he'd qualify though!!

[Edited 2005-06-06 23:55:57]
Not drinking, also isn't a solution!
 
whitehatter
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 7:00 am

Quoting Gladave (Reply 9):
dont forget they have kids at the age of between 13-17 and dont generally know who the father is

Lead me not into temptation, I can find my own way there...
 
trekster
Posts: 4319
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 8:05 am

You will have to wait for Alex (myt) to come and answer this question.

He loves this subject.

Should about now be touching down in MAN after a weekend trip to WAW
Where does the time go???
 
JGPH1A
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 3:59 pm

Answer: Kirkie is a chav.  Smile
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Banco
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 4:58 pm

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 16):
Answer: Kirkie is a chav.

Really? Has he been on a self-improvement course recently?
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
JGPH1A
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 5:01 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 17):
Really? Has he been on a self-improvement course recently?

So one hears - there were even rumours of paid (and legal) employment. He is writing a book about his experiences - "From Ned To Chav - The 12 Steps To Burberry Success". Of course it won't be a very LONG book, and will consist of mostly thumbprints and pencilled grafitti, but for Scotland, that's Literature !
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Banco
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 5:26 pm

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 18):
So one hears - there were even rumours of paid (and legal) employment. He is writing a book about his experiences - "From Ned To Chav - The 12 Steps To Burberry Success". Of course it won't be a very LONG book, and will consist of mostly thumbprints and pencilled grafitti, but for Scotland, that's Literature !

This is the one where the publisher, for the first time in history, had to have the title ghost-written, isn't it? Understandable really. Kirkie's counting technique follows the "1, 2, 3, Many" school of thought, so someone obviously had to help him out there. Equally, there are two words with more than one syllable, and he wouldn't know about them. The story was that Penguin gave up right about the point they got into a long and fruitless explanation to him about what "syllable" meant, for the same reason.

Nevertheless, it did win the Book prize in Scotland (re-named from England due to a certain food distribution company having the same difficulty re: number of syllables) where it defeated "Och, Who Yooz Lookin' At?" (a sociological survey) and "A Short History of Nearly Everything" by Bill Bryson, which was erroneously placed in the foreign language section due to the inability of the population to get past the third word of the title.
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
GVBIG
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 6:58 pm



Booked it, Packed it, f*cked off!
 
ly7e7
Posts: 2222
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 7:21 pm

Here's another specimen:

2 things are endless: ignorance and space
 
JGPH1A
Posts: 15080
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 8:46 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 19):
Kirkie's counting technique follows the "1, 2, 3, Many"

Kirkie counts in binary. "None, one, lots..."

Quoting Banco (Reply 19):
"A Short History of Nearly Everything" by Bill Bryson, which was erroneously placed in the foreign language section due to the inability of the population to get past the third word of the title.

I believe this book was withdrawn from competition altogether following numerous complaints to the Scottish branch of Trading Standards, from irate readers who found that it wasn't "short" at all, but consisted of more than 100 words !! The complaint was upheld, and because the publishers refused to change the title to "A Fecken Loooonng Husturrah O' A Lotta Bawlocks" the book has been withdrawn from sale in Scotland.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Banco
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:09 pm

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 22):
Kirkie counts in binary. "None, one, lots..."

Long research has led English etymologists to discover that the provenance of the Scottish word "binary" is entirely different to that recognised around most of the world. They found that there was no understanding of "binary" as we perceive it, but that it was in fact derived from the Scottish pubs. It appears that it came from three Scottish drinkers (identities sadly unknown, it could have been any of them) one of whom refused to pay his way. The other two protested about how he would "buy nary a drink, ya bastad", whereupon the phrase was corrupted to mean simply the other two who went over to the corner to play the longest game of darts the world has ever seen (501-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-1-etc). A nice confluence of two different concepts there I'm sure you will agree.

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 22):
I believe this book was withdrawn from competition altogether following numerous complaints to the Scottish branch of Trading Standards, from irate readers who found that it wasn't "short" at all, but consisted of more than 100 words !! The complaint was upheld, and because the publishers refused to change the title to "A Fecken Loooonng Husturrah O' A Lotta Bawlocks" the book has been withdrawn from sale in Scotland.

This is true; however, the decision to withdraw the book from sale has evoked howls of protest from the Scottish public, many of whom had never known the concept of toilet paper before some of the more enlightened members of the community found a use for said tome. Nevertheless, Health and Safety have now become involved, after the dreadful error made by one newspaper reviewer who called it "food for the brain". Nobody knows who told the Scots that this had been said, but rumour and a whispering campaign led at least one mobile takeaway to dip it in batter and deep fry it, with tragic results.
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
ly7e7
Posts: 2222
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:15 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 23):
Kirkie counts in binary. "None, one, lots..."

Which reminds of an old Scottish ethnological division of the human kind into three different subtypes: those who can count and those who can't.
2 things are endless: ignorance and space
 
JGPH1A
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:22 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 23):
This is true; however, the decision to withdraw the book from sale has evoked howls of protest from the Scottish public, many of whom had never known the concept of toilet paper before some of the more enlightened members of the community found a use for said tome.

Other examples of this interesting "cargo cult" phenomen include certain residents of lowland areas registering their domicile as Carlisle, or some other English locale, to take advantage of the much larger free local phone directory, which is used for the same purpose. Alas, the phone directories in Scotland are sadly slender. The under-developed verbal communication abilities of the locals have rendered the use of telephonic devices in Scotland almost pointless, and even mobile phone operators have been forced to introduce handsets with a single-button SMS feature that just transmits the simple message "Ehhjimmmyy" over and over again.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
DIJKKIJK
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:43 pm

Bad of you peeps to take on kirkie like that when he cannot even defend himself here  Wink
Never argue with idiots. They will bring you down to their level, and beat you with experience.
 
JGPH1A
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:50 pm

Quoting DIJKKIJK (Reply 26):
Bad of you peeps to take on kirkie like that when he cannot even defend himself here

That just adds to the humour-value ! Knowing that Kirkie is out there, gagged and fuming, while being royally and universally slagged Big grin
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Banco
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 9:56 pm

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 27):
That just adds to the humour-value ! Knowing that Kirkie is out there, gagged and fuming, while being royally and universally slagged

Besides which, the oft-repeated "In a battle of wits, Kirkie is unarmed" means that whether or not he is present has little bearing on his ability to defend himself. Big grin
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
cornish
Posts: 7651
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:10 pm

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 25):
The under-developed verbal communication abilities of the locals have rendered the use of telephonic devices in Scotland almost pointless, and even mobile phone operators have been forced to introduce handsets with a single-button SMS feature that just transmits the simple message "Ehhjimmmyy" over and over again.

Must be a nightmare being a telephone operator in Scotland - all those paper cups with bits of string you'd need.....
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
MD11Engineer
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:14 pm

Don´t you miss his usual "You are all tw@ts!" response? Big grin

Jan
Je Suis Charlie et je suis Ahmet aussi
 
JGPH1A
Posts: 15080
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:38 pm

Quoting Cornish (Reply 29):
Must be a nightmare being a telephone operator in Scotland - all those paper cups with bits of string you'd need.....

Paper cups ? My dear sir, clearly you are not abreast of the latest technological advances. The standard 200g bean tin replaced the paper cup as long ago as 1987 in all but the remotest exchanges, and indeed the paper cup has become a rare and cherished collectors item. The last models in use, such as the 1986 McDonalds SuperSize 8oz or the rarer and more fragile Pret a Manger 4oz coffee with weatherproof lid, are much sought after, and fetch high prices from connoisseurs of late 20th Century Pictish telecoms. A slightly battered GNER buffet styrofoam "lidless" from the last exchange to be upgraded to bean tins (Auchtymuchty, 1988) was sold at Sotheby's for GBP187,000.00 to a collector from Japan.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
cornish
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:40 pm

Quoting JGPH1A (Reply 31):
Pret a Manger 4oz coffee with weatherproof lid,

Pret a Manger ??

In Scotland ??

 rotfl 
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
JGPH1A
Posts: 15080
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:44 pm

Quoting Cornish (Reply 32):
Pret a Manger ??

In Scotland ??

Yes, the rarity value is extraordinary. Think of the terrible journey it must have faced, like finding a gold Samarkand dirham at Jorvik - it happens, but very seldom !
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
Banco
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 10:57 pm

Quoting Cornish (Reply 32):
Pret a Manger ??

In Scotland ??

I believe when the first one opened in Scotland, they were besieged with people hoping to see the Baby Jesus. Big grin
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
JGPH1A
Posts: 15080
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:00 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 34):
I believe when the first one opened in Scotland, they were besieged with people hoping to see the Baby Jesus.

True, but unfortunately nobody was qualified for the role of the 3 Wise Men (or the Virgin).
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers
 
cornish
Posts: 7651
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 8:05 pm

RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:01 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 34):
I believe when the first one opened in Scotland, they were besieged with people hoping to see the Baby Jesus.

 rotfl 
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
Logan22L
Posts: 4464
Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2004 5:59 am

RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:11 pm

Quoting MD11Engineer (Reply 30):
Don´t you miss his usual "You are all tw@ts!" response?

Jan, where's the spelling mistake? Wink

Logan
"The deeper you go, the higher you fly. The higher you fly, the deeper you go."
 
Banco
Posts: 14343
Joined: Mon Oct 29, 2001 11:56 pm

RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:23 pm

Quoting Logan22L (Reply 37):
Jan, where's the spelling mistake?

To paraphrase Dr Johnson, Kirkie managing to write is akin to a dog walking on its hind legs: it may not be done well, but you are surprised to see it done at all.
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
Logan22L
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Joined: Fri Jul 16, 2004 5:59 am

RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:39 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 38):
Kirkie managing to write is akin to a dog walking on its hind legs



Who knew Pe@rson was a redhead?
"The deeper you go, the higher you fly. The higher you fly, the deeper you go."
 
cornish
Posts: 7651
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 8:05 pm

RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:42 pm

Quoting Banco (Reply 38):
To paraphrase Dr Johnson, Kirkie managing to write is akin to a dog walking on its hind legs: it may not be done well, but you are surprised to see it done at all.

Yes but has anybody actually seen him write/type ??

I suspect he's got somebody (obviously not Scottish) to type his messages for him. I mean occasionally we can even almost understand what he's saying. Surely this should make us suspicious that its not all his own work  Wink
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
JGPH1A
Posts: 15080
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RE: Brit Members Please Help - What Is A "Chav"?

Tue Jun 07, 2005 11:44 pm

Quoting Logan22L (Reply 39):
Who knew Pe@rson was a redhead?

True - but his penchant for plus-fours is legendary.
Young and beautiful and thin and gorgeous AND BANNED ! Cya at airspaceonline.com, losers

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