airlinelover
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Question For All Of You

Mon Oct 03, 2005 3:15 pm

One of the upcoming topics for discussion in class is marriage in 2005 vs say the 40s/50s etc.. Namely how some women dont like taking the guys last name anymore.. SOme women think it's not right for men to want the girl to take the name, they think the guy should take the girls name. They think the "old way" is sexist, takes away thier rights, etc..

I'd like to hear all your opinions on this subject before class.

thanks

Chris
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AirWillie6475
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RE: Question For All Of You

Mon Oct 03, 2005 3:32 pm

MOST do want to take their husbands last name because after all it doesn't make a whole lot of difference if your planning on staying together till you die like your supposed to. I think this BS women complaining happens only in the U.S and it's because the women don't plan on staying with the husband. It's understandable since half the marriages will end in divorce here anyways. I am also willing to bet that these women who don't want to take their husbands last name are in the upper/wealthy class, because it's all about taking the money.
 
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NWOrientDC10
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RE: Question For All Of You

Mon Oct 03, 2005 5:58 pm

It depends on who gets married

Russell
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gkirk
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RE: Question For All Of You

Mon Oct 03, 2005 5:59 pm

Feminism at it's very worst  Yeah sure
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gordonsmall
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RE: Question For All Of You

Mon Oct 03, 2005 6:04 pm

If there's one thing worse than a male chauvinist pig, it's a woman who won't do what she's told!  Smile
Statistically, people who have had the most birthdays tend to live the longest.
 
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NWOrientDC10
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:47 am

I wonder what opinion Andrew "Dice" Clay would have about this  biggrin 

Cheers,

Russell
Things aren't always as they seem
 
canuckpaxguy
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 7:31 am

I know some women who are quite established in their careers who are afraid of changing their names for fear that many may not recognize the name. There are a number of women I work with who legally changed their name to their husbands'; but used a hyphenated name at work...and since no one EVER uses the hyphenated name, (only the first part of it), they seem to have their cake and eat it too.

I don't think it's a feminist thing anymore. Some women feel empowered by keeping their own name, while others feel empowered by taking their husband's.

I think it's more a sign of the changing times. Women are no longer just "wives" and matriarchs. They're career women with their own established identities with valid concerns for changing their names.

I'd hope my wife would take my name if I were to marry --- but given my last name, I wouldn't blame the woman for not wanting to take it!

As for the kids --- I'd want them to have my name. I'm still a bit stubborn on that one.

G
 
stlgph
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 7:38 am

Quoting AirWillie6475 (Reply 1):

AirWillie, you are a man of deep, deep, deep thought.

Quoting Canuckpaxguy (Reply 6):
while others feel empowered by taking their husband's.

Empowered...or devout in their religious obligations to the head of the household making sure the table is set every night promptly at 5 p.m.?
if assumptions could fly, airliners.net would be the world's busiest airport
 
B744F
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 7:41 am

Quoting AirWillie6475 (Reply 1):
It's understandable since half the marriages will end in divorce here anyways.

That's a misleading statistic, by the way. It is not half of THE marriages, it is half of NEW marriages each year end in divorce
 
canuckpaxguy
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 7:53 am

Quoting STLGph (Reply 7):
Empowered...or devout in their religious obligations to the head of the household making sure the table is set every night promptly at 5 p.m.?

Nah. Has absolutely nothing to do with religion.
I think it has more to do with saying, "I am not a spinster!".

I have a client who is a very wealthy, self-made woman, who always insists on being called MRS. She always jokes, "Hey, snagging my husband was the hardest thing I eved did. You're damn right I'm MRS So-and-so.

Or maybe, just maybe, it could be simply the woman's preference to take her husband's name.
G

[Edited 2005-10-04 01:01:55]
 
seb146
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 8:26 am

Tradition. The wife takes the husbands last name. It has been happening for so long but this is a different era. The wife does not stay home baking cookies waiting for Sally and Timmy to come running home from school to do their chores and finish thier homework. Times have changed. The invitations no longer go out to Mr. and Mrs. Ward Cleaver. Now, it is Mr. Ward Cleaver and Dr. June Smith who have been happily married for 15 years. It is just one of the many many things to discuss before a couple gets married.

GO CANUCKS!!
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SFOMEX
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 8:54 am

Wrong forum to ask it. Most A.netters can't legally get married so what they would know.  duck   biggrin 
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TNboy
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 9:09 am

I've always found it a bit odd that so many American women seem to have three names - (keeping their original name as a middle name?).... e.g. Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy, Mary Tyler Moore, etc., etc. There seem to be plenty of examples around, and its something we dont see in Australia. Maybe its just a celebrity thing?
Cheers
Bill
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regupilot
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 9:54 am

I'm not sure if its like this in most Latin America, but in Puerto Rico and Dominican Republic (Puerto Rico being a US Commomwealth) the wife keeps her name, and the family name becomes both wife and husband names. For example:

Husband: Hector Torres -> Mr. Torres
Wife: Maria Perez -> Mrs. Perez
This will be the house of the Torrez Perez Family.

Kids will be named, Hector Jr. Torres Perez / Maria Jr. Torres Perez.

The whole system is set for both last names. However, as the Puertorricans become more americanized (by USA) they are more likely to use only one name (The husband's -duh!-).. but most of the time its a pride thing. We are raised with two last names and that's how we are buried as well.

-Ragu
 
707CMF
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 6:18 pm

One very good reason : so that the mother shares her kids name.
(I know of a couple of ladies who got married after giving birth so that they could legally have the sae name as their kid's).

As for me, I am maybe old fashionned, but the day I get married, I do not wish to have a different name than my wife. Good thing, my girlfriend thinks exactly the same. Maybe we should get married.

Cheers,

707
 
itsjustme
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 6:37 pm

I wonder if these same women who think it's sexist to take their new husband's last name also think it's sexist to take their husband for everthing he has should the marriage end in divorce.
 
UTA_flyinghigh
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 6:45 pm

UTAette pulled a Zeta-Jones and merged both  Wink

UTA  checkeredflag 
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SLC1
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 8:08 pm

I'm really bored so i figured out how I would do it if I were the supreme ruler of all things:

EDIT: that could have been so much more nicely said like this:
You carry your name through either a maternal or a paternal line, and that is your name, however you borrow the name of your parent of the opposite sex when unmarried, and then your spouse when you are married - hyphenating your name with the borrowed name in whatever way sounds best.

That way:

1. You can have the same name as your parents for the entire time that you are a child & your children have your name until they marry (unless there be children of multiple marriages, in which case at least part of the name will be the same)
2. You can have the exact same name as your spouse, while retaining a part of your family name
3. Neither the female nor the male is given priority
4. Your parents' name and your childrens' names will all have at least 1/2-similarity with your own

In reality, I think it really comes down to what the couple really wants to do. If they want to do the traditional thing, that's great, hyphenate, that's great too, not change names altogether, so's that.




[Edited 2005-10-04 13:27:45]
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EddieGunsmoke
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RE: Question For All Of You

Tue Oct 04, 2005 8:30 pm

Quoting AirWillie6475 (Reply 1):
I think this BS women complaining happens only in the U.S

Here in Sweden the women/feminist-teens complain about almost everything. It doesn't matter what they complain about, as long as there are men involved. It's 'in' to be a feminist and complain.

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