I heard this story today and I wondered what put downs you've had / used / heard.
A waiter took a bottle of champagne to the woman and said, "This is from the gentleman seated over there," indicating the sender. She regarded the champagne coolly for a second; without looking over at the man decided to send a reply note. The waiter, who was waiting for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.
The note read: "For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank and 7 inches in your pants."
After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return. He folded his note, handed it to the waiter and instructed him to return it to the woman.
It read: "For your information, I have a Ferrari Maranello, a BMW Z8, a Mercedes CL600 and a Porsche Turbo in my garage. There is over twenty million dollars in my bank account. However, not even for a woman as beautiful as you would I cut off three inches. Just send the bottle back."
[Edited 2005-10-04 20:27:39]
[Edited 2005-10-04 20:28:46]