- Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshiper? He sold his soul to Santa.
- One reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
- What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate clauses.
- What is Santa's helpers union called? The AF or elves.
- What does Santa like to do in his garden? He likes to ho ho ho.
Flame away, I know they're bad
(credit to Garrison Keiler)