gkirk
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Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 8:28 pm

A guy went into a bar and met a nice girl. They have a few drinks and soon wound up at his place, in bed.

They're having a great time. She was on top when suddenly she had an epileptic seizure -- she was shaking and foaming at the mouth.

Our uninformed male thought this was incredible -- best sex he'd ever had. He finished, but she is still shaking and thrashing about with her seizure. He began to get nervous and took her to the emergency room.

A nurse asked what the problem was and he replied, "I think her orgasm's stuck!"
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
We're Nuts
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 8:41 pm

On behalf of fellow epileptics:  thumbsdown 
Dear moderators: No.
 
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ManuCH
Crew
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 9:20 pm

That's a really bad taste joke IMHO.
Never trust a statistic you didn't fake yourself
 
gkirk
Posts: 23345
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 9:36 pm

Och stop whining you  grumpy  old  gits
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
kiwiandrew

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 9:37 pm

I am so scared that one of these days a UN resolution will be passed banning all jokes because they may offend someone - lighten up people .

I recall a former colleague of mine many years ago after I came out saying to me "I suppose I can't tell you any more gay jokes because you will be offended" My reply was "Only if you tell them badly"
 
gkirk
Posts: 23345
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 9:40 pm

Quoting Kiwiandrew (Reply 4):
lighten up people .

Thank you Andrew  Wink
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
RichardPrice
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 9:43 pm

Quoting Kiwiandrew (Reply 4):
I am so scared that one of these days a UN resolution will be passed banning all jokes because they may offend someone - lighten up people

A recent antiracism law passed in the UK had comedians up in arms because it had the side effect of outlawing jokes mentioning minorities.

Yay, Britain sucks.
 
whitehatter
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Joined: Sat Jun 12, 2004 6:52 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 11:41 pm

A man walked into a New York bar and sat next to a very attractive, smartly dressed woman perched on a bar stool.

"Hi there, Good Looking. How's it going?" he asked.

The woman looked him straight in the eye and said, "Listen, I'll screw anybody, anytime, anywhere, your place, my place, it doesn't matter. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college, and I just love it!"

"No kidding?," said the man, "I'm a lawyer too! What firm are you with?"
Lead me not into temptation, I can find my own way there...
 
7LBAC111
Posts: 2427
Joined: Sun Jul 18, 2004 9:17 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 11:47 pm

Quoting ManuCH (Reply 2):
That's a really bad taste joke IMHO.

Jeez - get a life.  sarcastic 

Quoting Gkirk (Thread starter):

 rotfl 

7L
Debate is what you put on de hook when you want to catch de fish.
 
whitehatter
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Joined: Sat Jun 12, 2004 6:52 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Wed Dec 28, 2005 11:59 pm

Kirky truly is the Bernard Manning of the 21st century....
Lead me not into temptation, I can find my own way there...
 
Andreas
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:04 am

Quoting Gkirk (Thread starter):
Our uninformed male thought this was incredible

That sounds as if a Scottish male was at work here...except that part about the girl...sure it wasn't a sheep? Do they get epileptic fits, too? Well, on second thought most living beings would have epileptic fits if a Scot gets too close...

[Edited 2005-12-28 16:07:46]
I know it's only VfB but I like it!
 
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nighthawk
Posts: 4763
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:05 am

nice one whitehatter, that made me laugh!
 
andz
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:22 am

Reminded me of this one:

An elderly couple sitting in a bar were reminiscing about the old days and the man asked his wife if she remembered having sex out back 40 years ago. A young man sitting at the bar had overheard the conversation and was intrigued when they got up and went outside to recreate the act. He followed to watch and saw the woman bend over and grab the fence, and as the man got going she went crazy, shaking and screaming. After about ten minutes they both collapsed on the ground. The young man hurried over and said "wow you old timers really go for it, that was amazing!" The woman said to her husband " the fence wasn't electrified 40 years ago!"
After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says WTF...
 
gkirk
Posts: 23345
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:23 am

Quoting Andreas (Reply 10):

That sounds as if a Scottish male was at work here...except that part about the girl...sure it wasn't a sheep? Do they get epileptic fits, too? Well, on second thought most living beings would have epileptic fits if a Scot gets too close...

reltih  Yeah sure
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
N276AASTT
Posts: 592
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:31 am

I think these jokes were funny
Dejale Caer tu el Peso! YOMO
 
Banco
Posts: 14343
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:46 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 13):
reltih

Clever stuff, Kirkie. I reckon Bletchley Park would have been stuffed by that one. Big grin
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
Andreas
Posts: 5880
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2001 7:56 pm

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 12:53 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 13):
reltih

Yep, he's a real peach, our Kirkie is...be careful, Sabena332'll be able to read it, too, and off to the shelf our Kirkie goes...for a very long time  Wink Big grin
I know it's only VfB but I like it!
 
gkirk
Posts: 23345
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 1:44 am

Quoting Andreas (Reply 16):
Yep, he's a real peach, our Kirkie is...be careful, Sabena332'll be able to read it, too, and off to the shelf our Kirkie goes...for a very long time Wink Big grin

Funny that, you won't get banned for making racist remarks, yet I write reltih, and you think I'll get banned.

You frigging German idiot
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
DeltaGuy
Posts: 3965
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RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 8:15 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 17):
You frigging German idiot

Hahah  butthead 
"The cockpit, what is it?" "It's the little room in the front of the plane where the pilot sits, but that's not importan
 
Andreas
Posts: 5880
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2001 7:56 pm

RE: Wednesdays Joke Of The Day

Thu Dec 29, 2005 9:41 pm

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 17):
racist remarks

Racist remark...who ME???  wideeyed  eyepopping 

Never ever Kirkieboy would I make racist remarks!! Since when is "Scot" a race?? It's a disg-RACE and that is punishment enough Big grin

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 17):
and you think I'll get banned

Actually I don't hope or think so, it's way too much fun to have you aboard and kick your sorry ass around  Wink

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 17):
You frigging German idiot

Not that I care TOO MUCH, but statements like that could actually get you banned! So you better  tapedshut 
I know it's only VfB but I like it!

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