gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:17 am



Apparently Sabena332 and Andreas have 10 of them each...
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
skidmarks
Posts: 6614
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:51 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:21 am

 rotfl   rotfl   rotfl 

 thumbsup 

Andy  old 
Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
 
NoUFO
Posts: 7397
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2001 7:40 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:21 am

No, we sell them all to Northern England.
I support the right to arm bears
 
sunshine79
Posts: 1560
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2006 8:02 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:22 am

OMFG!!! As if David Hasslehoff isn't bad enough, they come up with this.
Formerly alcregular, Why drive when you can fly?
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:23 am

Quoting NoUFO (Reply 2):
No, we sell them all to Northern England.

No denial that it was invented in Germany then?  Wink
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
NoUFO
Posts: 7397
Joined: Tue Apr 17, 2001 7:40 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:26 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 4):
No denial that it was invented in Germany then? Wink

Look, it's called "Hoff soap", not "Hoff Seife" for a reason.
I support the right to arm bears
 
skidmarks
Posts: 6614
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:51 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:39 am

Looks like "Hoff (triangle shape) OAP" to me. Are you trying to say that the Hoffmeister is an old age pensioner?

Andy  old 
Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:40 am

I think NoUFO is actually embarrassed to be German now  Wink
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
flyAUA
Posts: 4287
Joined: Wed May 25, 2005 3:12 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:49 am

Old joke. I believe Nordair was the first to spread it around. And yes, I'd love to have one Big grin  rotfl 
Not drinking, also isn't a solution!
 
Andreas
Posts: 5880
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2001 7:56 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:55 am

No, we're following a more practical approach here to further boost Germany's thriving export business.

You want it...we build it!!

See, after decades of experience with those perverted Danes (funny...did someone see that coincidence?? It's mostly those neighbours to the North that are not easily dealt with in terms of economical use of their perverted minds  Wink), who cross the border to Germany on weekday nights and on Saturdays to buy cheap and totally demented porn (the Dutch are pretty good manufacturers that cater to Scottish tastes, too, but then you certainly know this, Kirklie) and our cheapest and most horribly-tasting beer, we have now found ways to get the last Euro out of those totally useless Scots.

And we keep on finding ways to get the very last Euro, even from the most demented and deranged Scottish mind.

So yes, I suspect we built this to sell it to Scots! And obviously Kirkie did so...well, looking at that....being on the front pic, it's the furry chest that attracted him! I hear we have a special limited version with real sheep wool on the chest...it even smells!!
I know it's only VfB but I like it!
 
skidmarks
Posts: 6614
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:51 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:00 am

Quoting Andreas (Reply 10):
there's an Austrian turning up making it even worse

Those Austrians eh? Just can't work out what to do with them can you? Big grin

Andy  old 
Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
 
jush
Posts: 1495
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 2:10 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:02 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 12):
Andreas, that German flag next to your name means you are automatically classed as a fool.

Careful mate your next ban is waiting not much further down the road i reckon.

Regds
jush
There is one problem with airbus. Though their products are engineering marvels they lack passion, completely.
 
skidmarks
Posts: 6614
Joined: Fri Dec 10, 2004 7:51 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:03 am

Quoting Jush (Reply 13):
Careful mate your next ban is waiting not much further down the road i reckon.

Hush now!!!!!! You'll spoil the surprise! Big grin

Andy  old 
Growing old is compulsory, growing up is optional
 
Andreas
Posts: 5880
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2001 7:56 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:06 am

Quoting Skidmarks (Reply 11):
Those Austrians eh? Just can't work out what to do with them can you?

Do WITH them?? You can't do anything with Austrians, very strange folks, these! We made an approach to the UN to rename Austria as Scotland II, you know, same look, same sexual preferences, but you know UN, that takes time...

What can you do, sometimes it's the neighbours to the SouthEast, too. Usually they kill themselves by falling from their mountaintops, but sometimes...sometimes...they need a helping hand...at least they were decent enough to keep away from WC 2006!
I know it's only VfB but I like it!
 
Andreas
Posts: 5880
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2001 7:56 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:11 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 12):
that German flag next to your name means you are automatically classed as a fool

I strongly suspect Sabena is sitting in his office right now, rolling himself a nice double-family-size-Bob-Marley-Memorial-Spliff, smiling to himself and thinking "nah, let's get him going just a little bit further...let him think he's safe this time.....lemme first get stoned, and THEN..."
I know it's only VfB but I like it!
 
Andreas
Posts: 5880
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2001 7:56 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:14 am

Quoting FlyAUA (Reply 16):
If you could have a soap dispenser with a hot busty lady on it which gets "wet" once you "finger" it, you'd also die to have one

If said dispenser is a humanoid female that goes by the name of Vanessa, dark-haired and from Vienna...well, yes, we'd be in business Buddy!  Wink Big grin
I know it's only VfB but I like it!
 
tmatt95
Posts: 476
Joined: Sat Sep 17, 2005 9:31 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:25 am

Hi,

I would NEVER use a soap dispenser like that lol, id prefer to stick to the dull white ones (without images on), or a more womanly version. I can see a small problem with these products, if the soap dispensers are designed to arouse, won't the shops be nigh on constantly having to refill the things  Wink  Smile

Quoting Andreas (Reply 10):
shit-faced Scottish expert

 Wow!, In my opinion That seems harsh (and indeed uncalled for)......even for non av. Andreas, I am sure you can make better and more constructive comments than that....... and for putting up with responses like that GKirk, welcome to my respected user list.

Matt
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:47 am

Personally, Andreas should be banned for all these attacks on me calling me a "sheep shagger", "shit faced", amongst others.
Suggested deletion for his posts now.
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
jush
Posts: 1495
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 2:10 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:51 am

Quoting Tmatt95 (Reply 19):
Wow!, In my opinion That seems harsh (and indeed uncalled for)......even for non av. Andreas, I am sure you can make better and more constructive comments than that....... and for putting up with responses like that GKirk, welcome to my respected user list.

GEEEEZ... what? I mean you are right with Andreas comment. I think he got carried away while writing but putting Gkirk on the RR because of his comment?
 wow .
There is one problem with airbus. Though their products are engineering marvels they lack passion, completely.
 
LO231
Posts: 2227
Joined: Tue Sep 28, 2004 5:55 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:08 am

Quoting FlyAUA (Reply 16):
I can't resist an ejaculating soap dispenser with a hunk on it

Did you just call Hasselhoff a hunk?????  Wow!  vomit 

Moe, I thought you had a better taste...  Wink

Regards,
LO231
Got both LO 788 frames already, next LO E95 and 734 BRU-WAW-BRU
 
flyAUA
Posts: 4287
Joined: Wed May 25, 2005 3:12 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:14 am

Quoting LO231 (Reply 22):
Did you just call Hasselhoff a hunk?????

Moe, I thought you had a better taste...

The version I have is with a hunk on it. I got the email a few months back. The version Kirkie posted in this thread with David Hasslehoff on it is just a cheap immitation. Yes I agree he's ugly  vomit 

Quoting Andreas (Reply 18):
If said dispenser is a humanoid female that goes by the name of Vanessa, dark-haired and from Vienna...well, yes, we'd be in business Buddy!

Oh stop crying, be a man, and get over her!  Wink
Not drinking, also isn't a solution!
 
Banco
Posts: 14343
Joined: Mon Oct 29, 2001 11:56 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:30 am

Quoting Tmatt95 (Reply 19):
In my opinion That seems harsh (and indeed uncalled for)......even for non av. Andreas, I am sure you can make better and more constructive comments than that....... and for putting up with responses like that GKirk, welcome to my respected user list.

Yes, Andreas. How dare you be mean to Kirkie like that. I'm sure you're a big enough character to apologise to him publicly, so we'll just have a quiet moment of reflection whilst you compose your abject and heartfelt note of contrition.

We don't want to see such behaviour on these forums and I don't doubt that having had a chance to think about it, you are fully aware that you've let yourself down.

 duck 

[Edited 2006-01-12 18:47:48]
She's as nervous as a very small nun at a penguin shoot.
 
Dougloid
Posts: 7248
Joined: Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:44 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:51 am

Nobody's asked the most important question.

Q: What is the first name of the founder of the Hoff soap company?
If you believe in coincidence, you haven't looked close enough-Joe Leaphorn
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:53 am

Quoting Dougloid (Reply 25):
Q: What is the first name of the founder of the Hoff soap company?

It's either Andreas or Klaus
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
sunshine79
Posts: 1560
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2006 8:02 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 2:58 am

Quoting LO231 (Reply 22):
Moe, I thought you had a better taste... Wink



Quoting FlyAUA (Reply 23):
Yes I agree he's ugly vomit

Phew, for a moment there I was gonna agree with LO231. Does anyone think he is a hunk? I don't like him personally, but each to their own tastes.
Formerly alcregular, Why drive when you can fly?
 
Thorben
Posts: 2713
Joined: Fri Sep 09, 2005 10:29 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 4:13 am

GKirk, GARPD and all you other Northern English:

gkirk_1137075316-160-5105.jpg

(You might have to click on it in order to read the text.)
France 1789; Eastern Germany 1989; Tunisia 2011; Egypt 2011
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 5:22 am

Quoting Thorben (Reply 25):
all you other Northern English:

Haw you, ye Eastern German pansy  Wink
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
Thorben
Posts: 2713
Joined: Fri Sep 09, 2005 10:29 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 7:20 am

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 26):
Haw you, ye Eastern German pansy

I'm from the West, Highlander! West Berlin, the sole island of capitalist slavery in the sea of the paradise for workers and farmers!

Do you really wear nothing under that skirt of yours?
France 1789; Eastern Germany 1989; Tunisia 2011; Egypt 2011
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 7:24 am

Quoting Thorben (Reply 27):
Do you really wear nothing under that skirt of yours?

Only when it's warm. If cold, then never go commando in a kilt. That's just foolish  Wink
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
Thorben
Posts: 2713
Joined: Fri Sep 09, 2005 10:29 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 7:31 am

Gkirk, do bikes in the UK have the steering at the wrong side, too?
France 1789; Eastern Germany 1989; Tunisia 2011; Egypt 2011
 
ltbewr
Posts: 12767
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2004 1:24 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 12:49 pm

I don't know if I would use such a dispenser, especially with the...um... position of the picture to the dispensing point.
 
brokenrecord
Posts: 747
Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2005 6:45 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:00 pm

WTF? Over.

I love hearing Europeans argue. It's definitely more amusing than the American, Canadian, and Mexican business we have over here.
 
jush
Posts: 1495
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 2:10 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 7:01 pm

Quoting Brokenrecord (Reply 31):
I love hearing Europeans argue. It's definitely more amusing than the American, Canadian, and Mexican business we have over here.

Yup it's funny isn't it...

Regds
jush
There is one problem with airbus. Though their products are engineering marvels they lack passion, completely.
 
cornish
Posts: 7651
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 8:05 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 8:02 pm

Quoting Thorben (Reply 29):
Gkirk, do bikes in the UK have the steering at the wrong side, too?

Up in Scotland, even Kirkie's chariot has its reigns on the right hand side  Wink
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
gkirk
Posts: 23350
Joined: Thu Jun 15, 2000 3:29 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 8:04 pm

Quoting Cornish (Reply 33):
Up in Scotland, even Kirkie's chariot has its reigns on the right hand side Wink

Away and drive your Combine Harvester you member of The Wurzels!
When you hear the noise of the Tartan Army Boys, we'll be coming down the road!
 
jush
Posts: 1495
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 2:10 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 9:08 pm

Quoting Gkirk (Reply 34):

Away and drive your Combine Harvester you member of The Wurzels!

Wurzels! I mean it's rubbish if in German English words are used to describe something in German. Like " Oh dieses Kleid is wirklich funky" (Oh, this ... is really funky") or "Hast du das schon gedownloadet?
Did you know that we use the word download in German but we even make a german participle out of it. To me this sounds like rubbish.

But even funnier is if native English speakers use German words and put letters to it that ain't there, really.

Regds
jush
There is one problem with airbus. Though their products are engineering marvels they lack passion, completely.
 
cornish
Posts: 7651
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 8:05 pm

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 9:13 pm

Quoting Jush (Reply 35):
But even funnier is if native English speakers use German words and put letters to it that ain't there, really.

Ahhh actually The Wurzels are a country bumpkin pop group from the 70s from the West Country (Somerset I believe). I suspect they wouldn't know a German word if it came up and bit them on the ass.

How to describe them - imagine them looking a bit like the Kelley Family at their worst and at their most in-bred, if you know how i mean (but all male and similar age) - but that same sort of just came from a field look.

I seem to recall the Kelley Family were popular (and appallingly bad) when i lived out there.
Just when I thought I could see light at the end of the tunnel, it was some B*****d with a torch bringing me more work
 
jush
Posts: 1495
Joined: Sat Apr 09, 2005 2:10 am

RE: New, Shocking German Invention

Fri Jan 13, 2006 9:19 pm

Quoting Cornish (Reply 36):
Ahhh actually The Wurzels are a country bumpkin pop group from the 70s from the West Country (Somerset I believe). I suspect they wouldn't know a German word if it came up and bit them on the ass.

How to describe them - imagine them looking a bit like the Kelley Family at their worst and at their most in-bred, if you know how i mean (but all male and similar age) - but that same sort of just came from a field look.

I seem to recall the Kelley Family were popular (and appallingly bad) when i lived out there.

I bet they will. 20 quid on it?
I lived in Somerset half a year and it doesn't matter whenever you meet someone and they realize you're German they show off what they can say.

Add to that that a lot of older men have done military service and have been to Germany via the military. They they do at least know some chat up lines or swear words.

Regds
jush
There is one problem with airbus. Though their products are engineering marvels they lack passion, completely.

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