saxdiva
Posts: 2329
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If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:39 pm

Okay, folks, I need some ideas...

Over the last few months, an occasional problem has turned into a serious nuisance around here: people are regularly using the area in front of our house and those on either side of us (as well as right across the street) as a sort of local "Lover's Lane." It seems the combination of no streetlights for several hundred yards, a lot of overhanging trees, and a popular restaurant/nightspot just a little farther up the hill are irresistable on a romantic summer night. And while I don't freak out at the thought of folks suddenly needing to be, um... intimate, like right NOW... I do object when they park in front of my house, make an evening of it, and then dump their trash, used condoms, and sanitary objects on the sidewalk, which has been happening several nights a week now. Not to mention that it's just plain creepy when I get home late, pull up as close to my house as possible and park, and walk right past a bouncing vehicle whose occupants are either completely oblivious to my presence (not likely, since I parked right behind them), or are so drunk they don't care (way more likely, I suspect). The other problem is since these are probably random teens and 20-somethings who've probably been out partying, I don't know whether they might also be drinking, getting stoned, gettin' busy with prostitutes or underage kids, or what, and I sure don't want it happening practically in my front yard.

Anyhow... I need a solution, and I'm looking for ideas. Trimming the trees isn't an option, apparently, because the ones in front of my house (between the sidewalk and the street) are owned by the city and no tree service will touch them. These last couple of nights, I've been calling the police. They've been as helpful as possible, but this is a busy city, and I hate having to waste their time with this ridiculous problem. I've also called the city and although they've promised to check it out, I think the real probability of getting a new streetlight is kinda slim. I do have a tree in my yard, about ten meters from the street, that has an electrical line up the trunk--we use it for a walkway light.

Any suggestions? I just got in from picking up a new batch of garbage, and I'm getting reallllly tired of this...

-Leanne
 
fumanchewd
Posts: 2878
Joined: Fri Jun 03, 2005 7:43 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:42 pm

Place a statue of a bassinette in your front yard. Smile Even though they may be using protection, it will still cause them to move on.
In the time of chimpanzees, I was a monkey...
 
AeroWesty
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:43 pm

Take photos, post them on a website.  devil 
International Homo of Mystery
 
LHMark
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:44 pm

Get one of those canned air horns. Guaranteed to ruin the mood. Oh, and tell the OPP to patrol a bit.
"Sympathy is something that shouldn't be bestowed on the Yankees. Apparently it angers them." - Bob Feller
 
Superfly
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:48 pm

Saxdiva:
Oh come on, when did you become a prude? Big grin

I used to know of a place in Burbank down the hill from the Castaways Restaurant that was on a street with no streetlights for several hundred yards and a lot of overhanging trees. That was much better than spending $90 for a hotel room.
Perhaps putting up a sign letting them to properly dispose of there condoms would be a good idea.
Bring back the Concorde
 
LOT767-300ER
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:48 pm

Quoting LHMARK (Reply 3):
Get one of those canned air horns. Guaranteed to ruin the mood. Oh, and tell the OPP to patrol a bit.

Great idea man.

You can also just go outside with a video camera, stand in your yard and they will see you eventually and will be scared shitless. Of course tape the license plates!
 
fumanchewd
Posts: 2878
Joined: Fri Jun 03, 2005 7:43 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhe

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:49 pm

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 2):
Take photos, post them on a website. devil

That's actually a great idea. You could even make money off of outdoor sex/ voyeur shots. Alot of people secretly take photo's of people bonking and sell them on the internet. I made a pretty penny off of my parents until they noticed the hole in the David Hockney.

[Edited 2006-07-25 05:50:23]
In the time of chimpanzees, I was a monkey...
 
canuckpaxguy
Posts: 1482
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhe

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:49 pm

If the city won't install street lights near your house, and the police don't patrol the street at all, I think your best bet is to call the local media and have them make a story out of it. This could be a really fun human-interest piece. Imagine how humiliating that might be when a news crew catches you and your mistress or boyfriend (or both).

You could also set up a strobe light to imitate the flash of a camera.
People may think they've been caught and leave. (Then again, that might make the situation worse).

I'll ask around the office tomorrow. We're a pretty creative bunch.
We'll have your problem licked (pardon the word) by tomorrow evening.

G
 
bristolflyer
Posts: 2103
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:49 pm

Make your own street lights - buy a 500w floodlight (only about $15) and turn it on facing the car when the occupants are about to get it on. That should give them a fright.

Do you know if it's the same people every time? If so once you've scared them off a couple of times they probably won't return.

BF
Fortune favours the brave
 
ANCFlyer
Posts: 21391
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:50 pm

Call the local constabulary - tell them there's a drug deal going on in front of your house . . . or some such suspicious activity . . . of course, your local constabulary actually has to give a crap . . . and show up. Roust 'em outta there.

Better yet, send Mr. Diva out there with a Remington and have him investigate a "suspicious vehicle" parked in front of your house.  biggrin 

Quoting Saxdiva (Thread starter):
The other problem is since these are probably random teens and 20-somethings who've probably been out partying, I don't know whether they might also be drinking, getting stoned, gettin' busy with prostitutes or underage kids, or what, and I sure don't want it happening practically in my front yard.

All the more reason to alert the authorities.
FOR THOSE THAT FOUGHT FOR IT, FREEDOM HAS A FLAVOR THE PROTECTED WILL NEVER KNOW OR UNDERSTAND
 
Superfly
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 12:59 pm

My gosh, you folks sound like prudes!

I live a block away from Golden Gate park and the part near my house is popular for outdoor sex. It's quiet, clean & safe. Luckily there are lots of trash cans and people are respectful and dispose of there condoms.

Quoting Fumanchewd (Reply 6):
I made a pretty penny off of my parents until they noticed the hole in

Videotaping your parents?  Wow!
YUCK!


The next Albert Eienstien could very well be concieved in the car parked out in from of your house.  Smile
Bring back the Concorde
 
piercey
Posts: 2188
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:03 pm

Get a shotgun, fill it with a blank, shoot at the car. They'll sober up pretty quick.

Floodlight the parking spot

strobe lights

get plates

smash windows with baseball bat

media

all else fails, get a car boot and boot the car and make some money off their horniness  Wink
Well I believe it all is coming to an end. Oh well, I guess we are gonna pretend.
 
AeroWesty
Posts: 19551
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:08 pm

Quoting Superfly (Reply 10):
My gosh, you folks sound like prudes!

Prudish? No, aware of property values, yes!

Quoting Fumanchewd (Reply 6):
You could even make money off of outdoor sex/ voyeur shots.

 yes  Especially if the license plates aren't blurred out, so that the "stars" can be found and flooded with phone calls asking for a "private show".
International Homo of Mystery
 
fumanchewd
Posts: 2878
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:09 pm

Quoting Superfly (Reply 10):
Videotaping your parents? Wow!
YUCK!

Ehh. Its nothing I haven't seen before. I'm sure that I got pumped a few times in the head at the age of (-)0-8 months.
In the time of chimpanzees, I was a monkey...
 
Superfly
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:12 pm

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 12):
Prudish? No, aware of property values, yes!

Living in San Francisco, I am very aware of the property values in my area.
Bring back the Concorde
 
IMissPiedmont
Posts: 6200
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:19 pm

Well I doubt that you see this happen so I suggest motion sensor lights.

In my case a 120 lb rottweiller works quite well. I've never seen anything quite so funny as a super quick departure from my property after the bitch goes to say hello. I'd not care if they didn't insist on playing the radio loud enough to hear 1/2 mile away and didn't leave "things" behind.
The day you stop learning is the day you should die.
 
ilikeyyc
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:28 pm

serious response:

Quoting BristolFlyer (Reply 8):
Make your own street lights - buy a 500w floodlight (only about $15) and turn it on facing the car when the occupants are about to get it on. That should give them a fright.

I like this idea.

funny response:
Or, you could walk up to the car , tap on the window and say: "You have two options. You can go someplace else, or I'm going to join you."
Fighting Absurdity with Absurdity!
 
bhmbaglock
Posts: 2489
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:33 pm

Q beam! Million candlepower or more. Hit em from your window without even having to go out the door.

After blinding them you could have real fun with a bullhorn too, i.e.

"NO! OUT OF THE CAR NOW, I DON"T CARE IF YOU"RE NAKED!"
Where are all of my respected members going?
 
Evan767
Posts: 2198
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 1:38 pm

Wow.... I usually never laugh at any of the stupid things posted on this site, but this thread really got me going. Rarely do any posts on A.net that are meant to be funny even bring a smile to my face. This thread is one of the funniest I have ever come across. Some things that I really laughed at:

Quoting Piercey (Reply 11):
media



Quoting Piercey (Reply 11):
smash windows with baseball bat



Quoting LHMARK (Reply 3):
Get one of those canned air horns.



Quoting Piercey (Reply 11):
Floodlight the parking spot
The proper term is "on final" not "on finals" bud...
 
oly720man
Posts: 5754
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 6:30 pm

Do the M*A*S*H thing. Put a microphone next to the offending vehicle and pump out the, erm, entertainment so everyone can enjoy it.
wheat and dairy can screw up your brain
 
User avatar
scbriml
Posts: 13469
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 6:41 pm

Quoting ANCFlyer (Reply 9):
Better yet, send Mr. Diva out there with a Remington

To shave them?  Wow!
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana!
 
Birdwatching
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 6:43 pm



Soren  santahat 
All the things you probably hate about travelling are warm reminders that I'm home
 
ZakHH
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 6:45 pm

Tired of a.net? Join a friendly aviation community!
 
ltbewr
Posts: 12424
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 8:34 pm

This is a serious problem for all parties.
Perhaps you should speak with your neighbors who are also being annoyed by this illegal beheavor, to put together a Neighborhood Watch program with the local police. Working with the police, putting up some signs, placement of some lights temporarly could help discourage your neighborhood from being used as a open bedroom. Maybe your group could borrow a mean and nasty dog, (Pit Bull, German Shepard, one with a big set of teeth) and walk it in the area annoying the interlopers.
You and your neighbors should go to the next meeting of your local government, or some representitive you vote for and present your complaints. You could ask for some increases of policing, put in some new or revised parking and other law changes to discourage the parking there as well as put pressure on the nightclub that seems to be the source of the trouble. Politicans love to help their constitutants with such issues to get your vote.
 
KROC
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:05 pm

Quoting Superfly (Reply 10):
My gosh, you folks sound like prudes!

I live a block away from Golden Gate park and the part near my house is popular for outdoor sex. It's quiet, clean & safe. Luckily there are lots of trash cans and people are respectful and dispose of there condoms.

Being a "prude" has nothing to do with this. Who wants to walk outside their own house, stroll down their sidewalk or walk around their front yard and have to see used condoms all over the place. Or maybe beer bottles, fast food wrappers and other trash? People can bang - More power to them. Just not in front of my house.
 
LHMark
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:14 pm

Quoting KROC (Reply 24):
People can bang - More power to them. Just not in front of my house.

Yeah, they should keep this behavior where it belongs- in the Target parking lot.
"Sympathy is something that shouldn't be bestowed on the Yankees. Apparently it angers them." - Bob Feller
 
CO7e7
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:15 pm

Quoting Saxdiva (Thread starter):
Any suggestions?

What about your local police?
 
User avatar
HAWK21M
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:32 pm

What do the Cops say.If they can't do anything.Focus a Flood light on those Areas.The Crowd will vanish in a few Days.
regds
MEL
I may not win often, but I damn well never lose!!! ;)
 
KROC
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 11:02 pm

Quoting LHMARK (Reply 25):
Yeah, they should keep this behavior where it belongs- in the Target parking lot.

How did I know that was coming? At least it was dark and not in somebodys front lawn.  mischievous 
 
BradWray
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 11:39 pm

You should get one of these.....


Bradley! Big grin
Hamilton: English for 'Alonso's bitch' :D
 
galapagapop
Posts: 861
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 11:47 pm

Add a toll and charge......
 
SlamClick
Posts: 9576
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Tue Jul 25, 2006 11:48 pm

In all seriousness, with regard to some of these suggestions: You may or may not have their license number but they, for sure, know where you live.
Happiness is not seeing another trite Ste. Maarten photo all week long.
 
jfk69
Posts: 1197
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:03 am

Police Siren and flashing Lights.......done and done.
 
miamiair
Posts: 4249
Joined: Thu Jul 15, 2004 9:42 pm

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:13 am

My favorite, is a cherry bomb under the car.

Hope the guy isn't getting a hummer when it goes off...
Molon Labe - Proud member of SMASH
 
StarAC17
Posts: 3400
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:16 am

Quoting ANCFlyer (Reply 9):
Call the local constabulary - tell them there's a drug deal going on in front of your house . . . or some such suspicious activity . . . of course, your local constabulary actually has to give a crap . . . and show up. Roust 'em outta there.

 checkmark  Just call in that you suspect drug use and ask that the local PD send an officer to check it out and hopefully scare the crap out of the kids or possibly ticket them for indecent exposure or something minor along those lines.

Quoting Birdwatching (Reply 21):
This Thread is Worthless without Pics

 rotfl   rotfl   rotfl   rotfl 
Engineers Rule The World!!!!!
 
Falcon84
Posts: 13775
Joined: Fri Sep 10, 2004 11:52 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:25 am

Yeah-open up their car door, and ask if you can take photographs.

They'll leave right quick.  Big grin
Work Right, Fly Hard
 
piercey
Posts: 2188
Joined: Sat Nov 12, 2005 11:07 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:32 am

Quoting Birdwatching (Reply 21):
Soren

 rotfl 

Quoting ZakHH (Reply 22):
Put up a sign

 rotfl  rotfl  rotfl  rotfl  rotfl  rotfl 
Well I believe it all is coming to an end. Oh well, I guess we are gonna pretend.
 
FlyKev
Crew
Posts: 1295
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 3:34 am

Sneak up and chuck a bucket of water over the car. No damage, little noise, but will totally ruin their fun inside.

Alternatly, steal their hubcaps. Face it, you want payment for use of your road for pleasure.

Kev.
The white zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only
 
BradWray
Posts: 641
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 3:42 am

When they are occupied, put a large pice of paper saying 'Thanks for the great entertanment, Im sure the sherif and co will get a great kick from this video at the loacal PD'

That way they are very embarrased, and will never come back!

Bradley! Big grin
Hamilton: English for 'Alonso's bitch' :D
 
A332
Posts: 1421
Joined: Wed Feb 02, 2005 3:58 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 3:42 am

Sneak over to the car and let the air slowly out of the tires... that way, you can really tick the guy off when he's trying to drop the girl off at home and he is faced with the prospect of spending more 'quality time' with her...
Bad spellers of the world... UNTIE!
 
ORFflyer
Posts: 3142
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 3:43 am

Open the car door, and tell them to hurry up, as a whole line of dudes are waiting for sloppy seconds. Big grin
 
NIKV69
Posts: 10893
Joined: Wed Jan 28, 2004 4:27 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 3:48 am

Get the video camera and make some amateur videos. Think of the money you would make. I mean the guy that had the idea to film college coeds on spring break has made millions!  biggrin 
Hey that guy with the private jet can bail us out! Why? HE CAN AFFORD IT!
 
YeahitsK
Posts: 492
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 4:52 am

Two words: Bigfoot costume.
Let's play some Pitch...
 
aa61hvy
Posts: 13021
Joined: Fri Nov 05, 1999 9:21 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 5:10 am

Saxdiva-give the people some credit, hooking up in a car is damn hard (at least in a small car)
Go big or go home
 
DeltaMD11
Posts: 1678
Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2002 4:56 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 5:15 am

I'd give them the thrill of their lives...get a pack of firecrackers or an M-80 if you have the means to obtain one and throw it under the car. That'll scare the crap out of 'em and you'll get a great laugh in the process!
Too often we ... enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought. - John Fitzgerald Kennedy
 
halls120
Posts: 8724
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RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 5:16 am

Quoting Superfly (Reply 10):
My gosh, you folks sound like prudes!

I live a block away from Golden Gate park and the part near my house is popular for outdoor sex. It's quiet, clean & safe. Luckily there are lots of trash cans and people are respectful and dispose of there condoms.

I guess you missed the part of the post where it says the visitors aren't cleaning up after themselves.

1) write a letter to the mayor/city manager outlining the problem, noting that the police aren't responsive. If you get no action,

2) get the news media involved, and if that doesn't work,

3) a big floodlight.
"Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself." Mark Twain, a Biography
 
searpqx
Posts: 4173
Joined: Thu Jun 29, 2000 10:36 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 5:33 am

Quoting Superfly (Reply 10):
My gosh, you folks sound like prudes!



Quoting KROC (Reply 24):
People can bang - More power to them. Just not in front of my house.

I don't even care if its in front of my house, as long as A) It doesn't disturb me, my neighbors or the neighborhood, and B) I don't have to deal with the aftermath. And since both seem to be happening to Leanne, I'd say it's time to do something.

Found this ingenious little device the other day, it's a motion sensor sprinkler. I use it to keep the local herons from eating the fish in my pond, but strategically placed and turned on after you are in for the night, it could be a usefull deterrent (as well as entertaining).

Let us know what you end up doing, if nothing else, this is better than the local gossip column.
"The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity"
 
YYZflyer
Posts: 3516
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2006 9:54 am

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 5:41 am

All you need is three items: a flashlight, a hockey mask, and a very loud chainsaw. Big grin That'll sure scare the crap out of them.

And if that fails, go stare into the car and knock on the window to see if they get disturbed. And don't forget you camera.  Wink
Avoid hangovers, stay drunk.
 
aaflt1871
Posts: 2166
Joined: Fri Dec 24, 2004 7:29 pm

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 5:45 am

Send me car to car to take notes on what they are doing, ask them to fill out a quick survey for a snow globe. I bet they will leave.


Signed

FLairport

That or just holler out the door, hey that is not who you were here with last time.
Where did everybody go?
 
ltbewr
Posts: 12424
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2004 1:24 pm

RE: If You Have To &%*! In Your Car, Do It Elsewhere!

Wed Jul 26, 2006 6:01 am

Some good ones here I liked

Quoting A332 (Reply 39):
Sneak over to the car and let the air slowly out of the tires...

 cheeky 

Quoting DeltaMD11 (Reply 44):
a pack of firecrackers or an M-80 if you have the means to obtain one and throw it under the car. That'll scare the crap out of 'em and you'll get a great laugh in the process!

Just hope they don't have a leaking gas tank  bomb 

Quoting Searpqx (Reply 46):
a motion sensor sprinkler. I use it to keep the local herons from eating the fish in my pond, but strategically placed and turned on after you are in for the night, it could be a usefull deterrent (as well as entertaining).

And hook it up to a hose that would spray on or into their car (problem is with the drought in the UK, this may not be an avilable option).

Quoting YYZflyer (Reply 47):
a flashlight, a hockey mask, and a very loud chainsaw.

 mischievous 
I especially like the chainsaw part....

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