AeroWesty
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Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 6:09 am

In-flight announcements are not entirely truthful. What might an honest one sound like?

"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. We are delighted to welcome you aboard Veritas Airways, the airline that tells it like it is. Please ensure that your seat belt is fastened, your seat back is upright and your tray-table is stowed. At Veritas Airways, your safety is our first priority. Actually, that is not quite true: if it were, our seats would be rear-facing, like those in military aircraft, since they are safer in the event of an emergency landing. But then hardly anybody would buy our tickets and we would go bust.

The flight attendants are now pointing out the emergency exits. This is the part of the announcement that you might want to pay attention to. So stop your sudoku for a minute and listen: knowing in advance where the exits are makes a dramatic difference to your chances of survival if we have to evacuate the aircraft. Also, please keep your seat belt fastened when seated, even if the seat-belt light is not illuminated. This is to protect you from the risk of clear-air turbulence, a rare but extremely nasty form of disturbance that can cause severe injury. Imagine the heavy food trolleys jumping into the air and bashing into the overhead lockers, and you will have some idea of how nasty it can be. We don't want to scare you. Still, keep that seat belt fastened all the same ... "


Link for the rest:

http://www.economist.com/opinion/PrinterFriendly.cfm?story_id=7884654
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Coal
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 6:12 am

I posted this a few days ago in Civ-Av, but got deleted 'cause I posted the whole text since not everyone has E+ membership.

Still funny, though.

Coal
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AeroWesty
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 6:36 am

I tested this out with someone who doesn't have a paid economist.com membership, and they were able to read it without any problems.
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bill142
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:29 am

Does Veritas actually exisit? In airline form anyway.
 
AeroWesty
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:38 am

Quoting Bill142 (Reply 3):
Does Veritas actually exisit?

No. It's called parody.
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bill142
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:51 am

Quoting AeroWesty (Reply 4):
No. It's called parody.

I didn't realise the economist had a sense of humor.
 
AeroWesty
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:55 am

Quoting Bill142 (Reply 5):
I didn't realise the economist had a sense of humor.

You should see what they stuff their shirts with!
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PlymSpotter
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 8:59 am

Veritas was also the name of a Political Party set up the UK by Robery Kilroy Silk with the aim of telling the governement what the people think. With him in charge though it was just another Kilroy style disaster, and eventually he got booted out of his own party!
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davestanKSAN
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 9:41 am

haha thats a cool article. The only part that's not true, or is in question IMO is the cell phone bit. I remember a thread on that topic recently in Civ-Av I think. Anyway, a good read, thanks AW!  Smile

Dave
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RE: Economist.com - An Honest In-flight Announcement

Thu Sep 14, 2006 2:11 pm

Quoting Bill142 (Reply 5):


I didn't realise the economist had a sense of humor.

You should read it more then.
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