sean377
Posts: 1128
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2001 1:18 am

Sperm Crisis

Thu Sep 14, 2006 9:35 pm

Sperm bank clinics are facing a "crisis" over a shortage of donors, an investigation found yesterday.

Almost 70% of UK clinics said they were getting no sperm or were having great difficulties sourcing it.

Any takers givers?


Full story: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/5341982.stm
Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man... Landing is the first!
 
baylorairbear
Posts: 2841
Joined: Wed Jan 26, 2005 5:25 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Thu Sep 14, 2006 9:42 pm

IAH777 and I have organized a relief flight, just for the two of us, tomorrow morning. We should have the banks operating at capacity by week's end.

BAB
I'm just skipping stones...
 
sean377
Posts: 1128
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2001 1:18 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Thu Sep 14, 2006 9:51 pm

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 1):

WOW! You put this guy to shame...

Mark Jackson made a series of 150-mile trips to donate sperm in Manchester last year, and was not troubled by the removal of anonymity.

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 1):
by week's end

You will have!
Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man... Landing is the first!
 
rammstein
Posts: 697
Joined: Wed Jul 26, 2006 6:05 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Thu Sep 14, 2006 10:42 pm

I guess that if only 20% of a.netters would take a visit the UK banks, the banks would have enough semen for the next 20 years Big grin
He who wishes to be rich in a day will be hanged in a day. --Leonardo Da Vinci
 
yooyoo
Posts: 5686
Joined: Wed Nov 26, 2003 5:01 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Thu Sep 14, 2006 10:43 pm

From this site?

I think you'd get more takers!  Wink
I am so smart, i am so smart... S-M-R-T... i mean S-M-A-R-T
 
Doona
Posts: 3382
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 9:43 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 12:33 am

Will I get paid?

Cheers
Mats
Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
 
mika
Posts: 2810
Joined: Thu Jul 27, 2000 7:53 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 12:34 am

Quoting Doona (Reply 5):
Will I get paid?

Do you have to get paid?  Silly
 
Doona
Posts: 3382
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 9:43 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 12:37 am

Quoting Mika (Reply 6):
Do you have to get paid?

It would be nice.
Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
 
sean377
Posts: 1128
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2001 1:18 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 12:57 am

Quoting Doona (Reply 5):
Will I get paid?

You might get a cup of tea and a biscuit, like when you give blood. Talking of giving blood, I wonder if you give sperm lying down or standing up???  Confused
Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man... Landing is the first!
 
Doona
Posts: 3382
Joined: Fri Feb 18, 2005 9:43 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:14 am

Quoting Sean377 (Reply 8):

You might get a cup of tea and a biscuit, like when you give blood. Talking of giving blood, I wonder if you give sperm lying down or standing up???

I doubt that anyone would know if you lie down or stand up while you're... um... "donating"...  silly 
Sure, we're concerned for our lives. Just not as concerned as saving 9 bucks on a roundtrip to Ft. Myers.
 
767Lover
Posts: 3254
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2003 6:32 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:21 am

Or, they could just not worry about it and encourage infertile couples to open their hearts and homes to children who need adoption.

(No offense to any of you who have gone through fertility treatments. It's just that I feel there are too many unwanted kids out there.)
 
User avatar
HAWK21M
Posts: 29917
Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2001 10:05 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:27 am

Quoting Sean377 (Reply 8):
I wonder if you give sperm lying down or standing up

Filling the container matters. Smile
Can the Donor have any contact with his child in future Or are the records confidential.
regds
MEL
I may not win often, but I damn well never lose!!! ;)
 
rammstein
Posts: 697
Joined: Wed Jul 26, 2006 6:05 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:57 am

Quoting Doona (Reply 5):
Will I get paid?

Yes, around £50 for each donation.

Quoting this site:

Quote:

When you have been chosen to donate, arrangements will be made for blood, urine and sperm tests to be taken at your convenience. Blood and urine tests will be repeated every three months for active donors. Sperm tests will only be required every six months for active donors or at intervals determined by us and without prior consent. These tests will be undertaken by a reputable Medical testing Centre who will forward the results to us for checking. By undertaking the tests you are consenting to this process. These tests will include:
BLOOD & URINE TESTS

* Chlamydia Trachomatis
* Syphilis
* Treponemal Pallidum
* Gonorrhoea
* HIV1 & 2 Antibodies + P24
* Hepatitis B
* Hepatitis C

SPERM TESTS

* Sperm count
* Motility
* Abnormal Forms
* Viscosity
* Liquefaction

You will be required to confirm on each occasion in writing that you have not since your last medical engaged in any activity that would possibly give rise to a transmissible disease through your sperm and that you have abstained from intercourse, masturbation, alcohol and narcotics use for a minimum of 72 hours before the donation.

Each donor can only be used up to a maximum of three times a week with £50 expenses paid on each donation.
He who wishes to be rich in a day will be hanged in a day. --Leonardo Da Vinci
 
Jkw777
Posts: 4427
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2003 11:15 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 2:00 am

If I was ever to donate, I'd love to get a helping hand from a cute nurse! Muhaha!  Wink

If I was able to make a small fortune from donating sperm I think I would give my day job up! Big grin

Cheers,
Justin  Wink
jkw6210@btopenworld.com or +447751242989
 
9VSPO
Posts: 4187
Joined: Sun May 18, 2008 9:03 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 2:02 am

The problem here in the UK is you don't get paid - only your expenses like petrol or bus fare.

The other thing is that since a change in the law kids can now contact the doner. So BAB, if you do decide to become a doner you could literally have hundreds of little BAB's knocking on your door in 20 years time.  Wink
 
User avatar
nighthawk
Posts: 4795
Joined: Sun Sep 16, 2001 2:33 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 2:57 am

Quoting Sean377 (Thread starter):
Almost 70% of UK clinics said they were getting no sperm or were having great difficulties sourcing it.

I leave the country for a week and look what happens!!!
 
sean377
Posts: 1128
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2001 1:18 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 4:03 am

Quoting Sean377 (Reply 8):
Talking of giving blood...

...you feel a small prick!
Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man... Landing is the first!
 
TedTAce
Posts: 9098
Joined: Sun Mar 27, 2005 12:31 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 8:00 am

If I didn't have two kids I'd be interested. The only way a girl is going to get knocked up be me is if she wears a blindfold and has no sense of touch/smell.
This space intentionally left blank
 
Leezyjet
Posts: 3542
Joined: Sun Oct 14, 2001 7:26 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 8:04 am

Quoting Jkw777 (Reply 13):
If I was ever to donate, I'd love to get a helping hand from a cute nurse! Muhaha!

If I was able to make a small fortune from donating sperm I think I would give my day job up!

At least you know yours works hey J  Wink

 Smile
"She Rolls, 45 knots, 90, 135, nose comes up to 20 degrees, she's airborne - She flies, Concorde Flies"
 
pwm2txlhopper
Posts: 1148
Joined: Tue Jan 27, 2004 10:40 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:07 pm

Quoting Sean377 (Thread starter):
Almost 70% of UK clinics said they were getting no sperm or were having great difficulties sourcing it.


Why don't they just go to a University Dormitory if they're having a hard time finding sperm? There's so much of it there they have to repaint the walls and ceilings every two years.
Oh, you can even get it there free on Friday and Saturdays after Mid-night!

[Edited 2006-09-15 06:12:50]
 
IAH777
Posts: 2810
Joined: Thu Mar 20, 2008 8:55 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:18 pm

Quoting BaylorAirBear (Reply 1):
IAH777 and I have organized a relief flight, just for the two of us, tomorrow morning. We should have the banks operating at capacity by week's end.

I've been carbo-loading in anticipation. Just make sure there's plenty of hand cream and copies of Swank. Hell, why sit at home and do it for free when you can get paid? Is Greasespot available to sub while I rest my arm?

Last time I was at the sperm bank, I saw GKirk working in the lab. Sadly, I've heard he was fired for drinking on the job.
 
NeilYYZ
Posts: 2443
Joined: Mon Jan 23, 2006 12:55 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:25 pm

I remember an article in a Toronto area newspaper last summer that was advertising for males from 19-35 who were in good health to fly down to Australia, give daily donations for 2 weeks and then fly back, all expenses paid. Now personally, I thought about it, didn't do it, but still, maybe if England could set up something like this program I'd go over there, sew my seed into a cup and have some good ol' English beer.
It may be too early to drink scotch... But it is NEVER too early to think about it...
 
Jkw777
Posts: 4427
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2003 11:15 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Fri Sep 15, 2006 3:49 pm

Quoting Leezyjet (Reply 18):
At least you know yours works hey J

This is very true...  Wink

Cheers,
Justin Big grin
jkw6210@btopenworld.com or +447751242989
 
EZYAirbus
Posts: 2323
Joined: Sun Sep 07, 2003 4:57 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sat Sep 16, 2006 6:39 am

Quoting Sean377 (Thread starter):
Sperm bank clinics are facing a "crisis" over a shortage of donors

With all the wankers in the UK i cannot see how this is possible
http://www.glenneldridgeaviation.com
 
IAH777
Posts: 2810
Joined: Thu Mar 20, 2008 8:55 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sat Sep 16, 2006 3:24 pm

Quoting EZYAirbus (Reply 23):
With all the wankers in the UK i cannot see how this is possible

mattlad alone could probably fill a vat. Just get him a webcam and some hand cream.
 
OlegShv
Posts: 603
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2006 7:22 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:18 am

Quoting Nighthawk (Reply 15):
I leave the country for a week and look what happens!!!

 Big grin
 
diamond
Posts: 3000
Joined: Sun Apr 11, 2004 8:01 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:28 am

Quoting IAH777 (Reply 24):
... Just get him a webcam ...

About two dozen a.netters just had their own 'sperm crisis' by reading that line. Oh, the stories that MSN could tell ...
Blank.
 
petertenthije
Posts: 3308
Joined: Tue Jul 10, 2001 10:00 pm

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:31 am

Quoting Sean377 (Reply 2):
Mark Jackson made a series of 150-mile trips to donate sperm in Manchester last year,

Maybe he should change his name to Mark Jacks-on and on and on and on...
Attamottamotta!
 
sean377
Posts: 1128
Joined: Sat Mar 03, 2001 1:18 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:39 am

Quoting Petertenthije (Reply 27):
Jacks-on and on and on and on...

 rotfl 

...and his Russian cousin Mark Jacksov
Flying is the second greatest thrill known to man... Landing is the first!
 
kaddyuk
Posts: 3697
Joined: Thu Nov 08, 2001 1:04 am

RE: Sperm Crisis

Sun Sep 17, 2006 4:46 am

Quoting TedTAce (Reply 17):
if she wears a blindfold and has no sense of touch/smell.

You should PM Speedbirdie...
Whoever said "laughter is the best medicine" never had Gonorrhea

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